February 19, 2018

Glorious Living w/ Coach Megan: Finding Forgiveness and Freedom from Guilt

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Dear Coach Megan,

I am really struggling with letting go of feelings of guilt I have had over things I did a long time ago. I am hoping that you can give me some direction on how to let go of this guilt that is keeping me locked up inside. I know God needs me free from this so that I can truly live free and forgiven for his glory. Thanks in advance for any guidance you can give! ~S.J.

Thank you so much for your questions, S.J!

I remember when my kids were little and they would fall and scrape their knee on the playground. They would come running towards me at full speed, tears in their eyes for me to kiss it and make them feel better. It always worked, every time….a big hug and lots of love always made the sting of a scrape feel that much better. A few moments later, they would run off again, to play in the sun without a care in the world. The same is true when we take our bruised and broken lives to God…. He forgives and forgets, and it ALWAYS works! AND…when we trust in Him, He takes away all the guilt.

Luke 5:20

When Jesus saw their faith, he said, “Friend, your sins are forgiven.”

Please, dear friend, do not stay stuck in the ditch of guilt! God has so much bigger and better plans for you that cannot be fulfilled to their fullest until you let yourself be FREE and transformed! I have some practical steps for you today that I pray will help you grow in Christlike maturity and bring all your guilt to our forgiving God for good! Grab a journal, print this out, and get ready to work through all the guilt that is holding you captive so you can finally be set free!

1. Find the source of your guilt

  • Examine why you feel guilty
  • Determine if your guilt is true or false
  • Use Scripture as the ONLY standard for determining true guilt

Psalm 51:6

Yet you desired faithfulness even in the womb;
    you taught me wisdom in that secret place.

2. Own the responsibility for your sin

  • Agree with God that you are guilty of sinning
  • Ask God to reveal your personal sin patterns
  • Make restitution to those you have sinned against

1 John 1:9

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.

3. Realize and believe that God means what He says
  • Thank God for the gift of His Son, who paid for your forgiveness
  • Thank God for His unending forgiveness, even if you don’t feel forgiven
  • Choose to believe what God says

Ephesians 1:7

 In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace

4. Stop and give up for good dwelling on the past

  • Give up holding on to past pain
  • Give up self-condemnation
  • Give up refusing to forgive others

Isaiah 43:18

Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past.

5. Invest time in renewing your mind

  • Memorize scriptures that reinforce God’s forgiveness
  • Remember that in Christ, you are a “new creation” {2 Corinthians 5:17}
  • Learn to see yourself as a valuable child of God

Ephesians 4:22-23

You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self,
which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds;

6. Verify satan’s lies to God’s truth when satan accuses

  • Learn to discern the difference between the Holy Spirit’s voice and that of satan
  • Answer satan’s accusations with truth from Scripture
  • Verbalize a personal prayer receiving God’s forgiveness

Isaiah 54:17

“No weapon forged against you will prevail,
    and you will refute every tongue that accuses you.
This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord,
    and this is their vindication from me,”
declares the Lord.

7. Exchange your life for the life of Christ

  • Understand you cannot live the Christian life in your own strength
  • Allow Christ to transform you and live out His character through you
  • Continue to nurture the Holy Spirit’s presence through personal prayer and Bible study

Galatians 2:20

I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me.
The life I now live in the body,
I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.

8. When you obey Him, God brings your feelings in line with the facts

  • Know that God is a God of second chances
  • Know that your feelings won’t change immediately
  • Know that feelings usually follow thinking

Psalm 32:1-2

Blessed is the one whose transgressions are forgiven, whose sins are covered.
Blessed is the one whose sin the Lord does not count against them 
and in whose spirit is no deceit.

Dear God,

We ask You to give us the discernment to know when we are feeling false guilt instead of true guilt. Please Lord, have Your Spirit convict us when we are headed the wrong way so that we will get on the right path and be in line with Your will. We also pray that we will always be sensitive to the convicting touch of the Holy Spirit’s hand. Thank You that we are forgiven and set free through the redemptive work of Jesus on the cross. We pray these things in Your holy name, amen <3

Blessings,

Coach Megan 🙂

Glorious Living w/ Coach Megan: Christ’s Ambassadors

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2 Corinthians 5:20 and 21

We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ’s behalf: Be reconciled to God. 

God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.

*********************

 Merriam-Webster’s definition of Ambassador:

1: an official envoy; especially: a diplomatic agent of the highest rank accredited to a foreign government or sovereign as the resident representative of his or her own government or sovereign or appointed for a special and often temporary diplomatic assignment
2a: an authorized representative or messenger, b: an unofficial representative <traveling abroad as ambassadors of goodwill>

Being a Christ follower, I am who people look to in order to see what Christianity is like. If you are a Christ follower, you are, too. Our eternal home is in Heaven, and our job as ambassadors of Christ is to show people how amazing it’ll be through the way we live our life and how we interact with others…showing the love of Christ.

Why are we ambassadors? Jesus has instructed us to do so, in the Great Commission. In Mark 6:15 Jesus tell us to “Go into all the world and preach the gospel to all creation.” That is all the reason we need, right? So then why is it so HARD to just do it??? Fear of rejection? Afraid you won’t have all the answers? Why?

We are commissioned to NOT keep the good news to ourselves – it should be contagious! In Matthew 10:27,  Jesus tells us “What I tell you now in the darkness, shout abroad when daybreak comes. What I whisper in your ear, shout from the housetops for all to hear!” If you are called to do something by the Lord and you choose to ignore that calling, not only are you not receiving the full blessing of God, but think of all the lives who are also not receiving it! God put you on this earth for a specific reason and puts you in the different seasons and places you are in for His purpose to be done on the earth. If you are not seeking Him to guide you through this life, to give you the boldness to be His ambassador, just think of the many lives you are not affecting!

Before we can be ambassadors, we need to know the person we are representing. Think about it…if you took a job as an ambassador of a country you knew nothing about and had never been to, you wouldn’t be able to do a very good job of representing it, right? It makes sense then that in order for us to do a good job of representing Christ to an unbelieving world, we need to first spend time getting to know Him. This means that we need to be spending time with Him on a regular basis—reading His Word, spending time in prayer, and growing closer to Him. He is craving this relationship with you…. all relationships need work. Are you doing your part?

Being an ambassador of Christ means being “like Christ” and having a servant’s heart. We need to strive to:

  • Be kind and compassionate.
  • Challenge what is wrong.
  • Speak out for truth.
  • Be joyful.
  • Refuse to conform to society’s standards.
  • Have self-control.
  • Do things only to please God, not man.
  • Be spontaneous and creative.
  • Think of others rather than yourself.
  • Live out life in all its fullness.

We must have integrity in our words and actions. Integrity means that what you say, what you profess to believe, and what you actually do, match up. This is certainly an intentional process. For us to be effective ambassadors of Christ, we can’t go around claiming to love God and then not show that we love Him by our actions. Actions speak louder than words, right? It is imperative that our actions back the Word of God that we are professing. We are not perfect, we are human…but we can strive to do our best, intentionally, everyday for His Glory!

We must love people without any agenda. We don’t love people so that they will become Christians. We show love to them because they are God’s creation and sometimes, as a result of that, they will eventually come to accept Christ. We shouldn’t give up on loving them if after a few months it has had no visible spiritual impact. Loving people doesn’t mean doing good deeds begrudgingly for them because we feel as Christians that is what we should be doing. If that is the case, we are acting out of duty, not love.  Sometimes it can be hard, but we need to remember the example of Jesus. Many of the people He showed love to turned their back on him (such as the time he healed ten lepers, but only one came back to thank Him). We are working for a heavenly reward, not an earthly one…and that must remain at the front of our minds and hearts.

We must encourage people not to want to stay “on the outside looking in.”  This means making them want to be a part of the Christian community we are a part of. In Romans 11:14, Paul says “I want somehow to make the people of Israel [the non-believing Jews] jealous of what you Gentiles [the early Christians] have.”  If people see contentment, joy, and genuine passion when they look to us they are going to be curious. If all they see is people with the same doom and gloom as the godless world around them, they won’t be interested. Would you?

We must be openly honest about our faith, not hiding it when it is inconvenient. In Matthew 5:15, Jesus says “No one lights a lamp and then puts it under a basket. Instead a lamp is placed on a stand, where it gives light to everyone in the house.” Because sharing your faith isn’t just about your words, it’s about actions, too. Here is a question to honestly ask yourself: If someone was watching your life 24/7 “Big Brother” style, how long would it take for them to realize you were a Christian? Would it be evident through the way you live your life, or would it take them until you went to church on Sunday to make the connection?

Hmmmmmm? OUCH!

Being an ambassador of Christ means being his hands and feet to a world that desperately needs God.

1 Corinthians 12:27 says that “All of you together are Christ’s body, and each of you is a part of it.” You have probably heard the Casting Crowns song, If We Are the Body, which has a really challenging chorus for those of us who profess to be trying to be ambassadors of Christ.

“If we are the body,

Why aren’t His arms reaching, why aren’t His hands healing,

Why aren’t His words teaching, why aren’t His feet going,

Why is His love not showing them there is a way?”

If we REALLY are serious about being ambassadors of Christ, we need to reach out to the world through being Christ’s hands and feet.

Being an ambassador is what we have been called to do. It is not optional to the Christian life.

Ephesians 6:19 and 20

Pray also for me, that whenever I speak, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel, 

 for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it fearlessly, as I should.

Blessings,

Coach Megan 🙂

Glorious Living w/ Coach Megan: Stress Management

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Dear Megan,

I have been feeling really overloaded and burned out lately and I’m not sure what to do to make it stop. I was on your GCH call last week and I completed the exercise you gave us and talked about in your blog last Friday…. but I just feel stuck with what to do next. I know I need to delegate more and God showed me some tasks He does not intend for me to do, but I feel like I could be handling it all (especially the stress) better. I’m hoping you can give me some advice on this!

~M.

Sweet sister,

Thank you for taking the first step by doing that exercise from last week ! I pray it was a blessing for you to be able to see in black and white how you are spending your precious resource of time. Our world makes it easy for us to feel overloaded, over burdened and over worked! What I heard through your cry for help is that you are looking for some practical stress-management tools to help you now that you are beginning to spend your time more wisely (as God intends you to).

Adopting healthy stress management skills will enable you to slow down, stop, yield and reduce speed at appropriate intervals on your path of life. In turn, your pace will be regulated and you will be lifted out of the ditch of overload and burnout. As you work through this exercise, you will see how you can begin to walk the road to transformation in the peaceful assurance that God will never call you to do more than He gives you time and ability to do (1 Thessalonians 5:24).

SLOW

{Slow down and make the necessary changes for good physical health}

  • Do you eat a balanced and healthy diet?
  • Do you exercise at least three times a week?
  • Do you take at least one day of rest per week?
  • Do you get adequate restful sleep most nights?

Psalm 127:2

 In vain you rise early and stay up late,
toiling for food to eat—for he grants sleep to those he loves.

{Slow down and evaluate your priorities}

  • Do the exercise from last week if you have not done so (Link up above)
  • Consider other priorities that should be on the list
  • Choose your commitments with careful prayer
  • Eliminate unnecessary stressful obligations
  • Don’t accept impossible deadlines
  • Don’t give in to the pressure of urgency
  • Tackle only one problem at a time

Ecclesiastes 4:6

Better one handful with tranquility
    than two handfuls with toil and chasing after the wind.

{Slow down and nourish your spiritual life}

  • Remind yourself daily to “be still, and know that (He is) God” {Psalm 46:10}
  • Open lines of honest communication with God about your concerns, needs, and fears
  • Set aside time daily for personal prayer and Scripture meditation
  • Memorize Scripture that builds assurance of God’s love {Psalm 36:7; Jeremiah 31:3; John 14:21; Romans 8:39}

Psalm 119:71

It was good for me to be afflicted so that I might learn your decrees

STOP

{Stop and look at the real reason you are experiencing stress}

  • Do you try to meet your own needs instead of waiting on the Lord?
  • Do you think God cannot accomplish His purposes without your over-achieving?
  • Do you seek self-worth through proving your adequacy and effectiveness?
  • Are you Spirit-led or people-pressured?

Galatians 1:10

Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people?  If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.

{Stop, confess and turn away from any known sin in your life}

  • Do you manipulate or control others?
  • Do you feel envious or jealous of others?
  • Do you express your feelings inappropriately?
  • Do you overreact to criticism?
  • Do you have impure motives?

Proverbs 28:13

Whoever conceals their sins does not prosper,
    but the one who confesses and renounces them finds mercy.

YIELD

{Yield to God’s sovereign control over your circumstances}

  • What is God doing in your circumstances?
  • In what way does God want you to change?
  • How does God want you to respond?
  • Do you have impure motives?

Proverbs 21:1

A king’s heart is like streams of water in the Lord’s hand:
He directs it wherever He chooses.

{Yield to God your rights and expectations}

Dear God,

  • “I yield my right to control my circumstances.”
  • “I yield my right to be accepted by others.”
  • “I yield my right to be successful.”
  • “I yield my right to be heard and understood.”
  • “I yield my right to be right.”

Proverbs 3:5

 Trust in the Lord with all your heart
    and lean not on your own understanding

RESUME SPEED

{Resume speed, living in the presence of God}

Dear God,

  • “I choose to let Christ live His life through me.”
  • “I choose to live in the present, not worrying about tomorrow.”
  • “I choose to refocus my thoughts away from my pressures to Your purposes for allowing these pressures.”
  • “I choose to have a thankful heart regardless of the pressure I feel.”
  • “I choose to call on You, Lord, for wisdom and peace.”
  • “I choose to commit to talking less and listening more.”

Psalm 62:1

My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from Him

Blessings,

Coach Megan 🙂

Glorious Living w/ Coach Megan: Managing Your Time

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This past Tuesday night I had the privilege of being a part of an incredible conference call with many of you and my dear friend Crystal Breaux. I gave a little assignment on the call and I know that many of you have taken me up on it with much success! Praise God! I thought it might help to give you more in-depth background on this subject of time management and the exercise as a whole. I pray this is a blessing to all of you!

______________________________________

As Christian women, it is incumbent upon us to achieve good time management skills. We need to be on time for appointments, conference calls, or any of the millions of events we commit to. Some of us already have these skills and others of us need to do more work in this area.

I have found that when the events you commit to line up with your values, you have less of a struggle with participating or completing them. When events are contrary to what you feel is right, is it any wonder why confusion or stress can result? It has been said that if we do not control the events in our lives, then the events can overrun and begin to control us. So, my friends, now is the time to take control of our time and begin to prioritize more effectively!

I certainly know this first hand…. From the outside looking in, I have a pretty busy life as all of you do. I am a mom to 3 teens and 2 young adults (all 5  live under our roof.) I have a husband who travels just about every week for 3-4 days…so most of the time, I am a “single mom.” I work 20+ hours a week outside my home and I work 20+ hours a week as a Christian Life Coach. We lead a bible study in our home Friday nights and I volunteer with the high school kids Thursday nights at our church…and then there’s all of my other household duties, appointments, dates, etc.

Are you still with me?

To some of us, this may sound easy and others may feel overwhelmed by this concept, but God does not call us to anxiety or confusion…. That all comes from the Devil and he would love nothing more than to de-rail your day from the Lord’s purposes in your life. How much longer do you plan on letting satan win?

First, we need to understand event control: There are only 2 types of events

  1. The events we cannot control: traffic, weather, time of day, other people, your family
  2. The events we can control: the time I get up, the foods I eat, my exercise program, how I allow others to make me feel, and who my friends are

The problem lies in the basic thought patterns of most individuals…. There are some events in life I CANNOT control, but I believe I CAN!! There are some events in life I CAN control, but I believe I CANNOT.

We cannot control people, places, or things. The only thing in life we can truly control is ourselves. Also, others cannot make us feel a particular way, without our permission. If we feel bad, we have allowed this. It takes a conscious decision to feel good and remain positive…. understanding these concepts and successfully living them out will save you a lot of time!!!

“God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference!”

~The Serenity Prayer

Increasing Productivity

When we control our events, we have increased productivity, thus, higher self-esteem! People who feel good about themselves produce good results! Isn’t it true that when you take the time to plan your day, you accomplish more than when you fly by the seat of your pants? Isn’t it rewarding to check off the things on your list and see what you have completed?

Ideally, your first step is to get a day planner or learn a new application in your smart phone. I prefer Microsoft Outlook because for my job, I spend much of my day on the computer and Outlook also syncs to my other mobile devices. In that calendar or day planner, you will be able to organize your day from morning ’til night. The benefit of this is that you will be able to see exactly how you spend each hour of your day.

I have an exercise for you to make you aware of how you currently spend your time:

First, begin by writing everything you do in real time as you go throughout your day. This includes everything from saying your prayers to brushing your teeth to having lunch with your favorite friend. Everything takes time! Next to each event, write down the time it takes to do it. Do this for three days to evaluate how you spend your time.

Next, you must plan your days’ events with priorities in mind. Use a letter A to indicate high value priorities, B for medium value priorities, and C for low value priorities.

  • An  A  event is a “MUST” (doctor appointment, boss meeting, pick kids up from school, etc.)
  • B  event is a “should do” (getting your car washed, calling your mother-in-law, sending a card to a friend)
  • C  event is a “could do” (read a good book, a sale at the mall, etc.)

       ****can you make any into a D event and DELEGATE????

This is a great way to see what we deem as most important in our lives. Is God really first? Or do we just say He is and put Him on the C list??? When we look at our list it is important to realize that no matter what, we should get every A event accomplished…then we can go to the B and C events are those we can push to the next day or things we can fit in if time allows.

What we realize when we schedule everything we do, like watching TV and spending time with our spouse, is that we sometimes spend more time watching TV than we do spending time with our spouse! The problem most people don’t realize is that WE CANNOT MAKE UP TIME!!! Once time is wasted, we cannot get it back. There will be time for re-runs of your favorite show, but if you show up for TV more than you do for your spouse, you may be watching those re-runs alone!

Optimum time management is when my behavior is in line with my values!!!

 To help you decide how to spend your day, pray for God to give you discernment. What is important and what is not? By listing all the things you do each day, you can begin to see what it is you spend your time doing. Most of us waste time, but until we look at it in black and white, we have trouble seeing it.

I spend the first 45 minutes of my morning with God every single day and since I have let Him have complete control of my to-do list, I am amazed with all I get done and how good I feel about it! I live for Him, so its silly for me to think that I can actually control my day! I can create boundaries around the tasks God wants me to complete but that’s about the extent of the control I have on my days!

We must live our everyday life and fulfill our obligations.

The Universal to-do list looks something like this:

  • Work (meetings, marketing/ publicity, desk tasks, planning, billing, reading, writing)
  • Errands (banking, gas station, post office, cleaners)
  • Children (school, lessons, sports, car pool, play dates, parties)
  • Appointments (health, fitness, beauty, car, animals)
  • Shopping (food, clothing, home, gifts)
  • Correspondence (bills, letters, cards, packages)
  • Home (cleaning, laundry, cooking, repairs, entertaining, gardening, decorating)
  • Family (holidays, reunions, get-togethers)
  • Friends (dinners, hobbies, coffee dates)
  • Church/Community (attend church, fundraising, service projects, Bible study)
  • Personal (rest, introspection, relaxation, grooming, creativity, education, pleasure)

Life is made up of one resource: TIME. You do have choices on how you spend your time. Start by considering why you waste time on the things that do not agree with your priorities based on what your values are. Re-evaluate the importance of these events.

Life is too short to waste because you can never recover what you lost. When you realize this, you will see the changes you can implement. You will then begin to experience relief when you have more time to spend on the things you cherish and less time on the things you don’t.

How to realistically manage your time wasters (TV, Facebook, email, phone, etc…)

I schedule it in! Seriously! It might look like I am on Facebook all day because I have it available to me on mobile devices, but I only really spend TIME on Facebook in the morning and in the evening for a half hour at a time, if that.

I do not answer my phone every time it rings and I do not answer emails as soon as I get one. I carve out periods of time in my day for those things. Now, if it is my spouse or one of my kids, I answer when I can; but for calls that I KNOW are not urgent, I give them a backseat until the time I have scheduled for that. Otherwise, I would let my day get de-railed all over the place! Satan would love that, right?

You might not like to hear this, but I don’t watch TV. Now, I have other ways I unwind, but TV is not one of them. I like to play words with friends or read a book, but that time is scheduled and it is a “C” item for me…as time permits. God is so good, He knows when I need that time and He always makes a way for me to have it!

Now…. have you done this exercise yet? I would love to hear your thoughts in a comment below!

Blessings,

Coach Megan 🙂

Glorious Living w/ Coach Megan: In God’s Strength

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Hey sweet lady,
How does a working mom balance time for kids, home, work, church, etc when husband travels for his job?  Brian’s job has been more stressful & time consuming than I thought it would be a year ago.  I’m left to manage EVERYTHING for the household and lately have been reprimanded for being too grumpy.  How do I keep things running smoothly without feeling resentful, unappreciated, etc for what I do?
~AB
My Dear AB,
Ah… I know this world you speak of all too well and my husband has traveled for work for the past few years, At first, I was a HOT MESS…. but I have learned strategies that have helped so much! There are many layers to your question…. but they all come down to RELATIONSHIP!
Your relationship with God
Your relationship with your Husband
…and, yes… in that order!
***I could easily write whole blog posts on each item listed below… so please forgive me if I am too vague or if you need more clarification. I will do my best to share with you what has worked well in my own family and I am more than happy to expand on any of these suggestions in future blog posts or in comments on today’s blog!
The more intimate your walk with the Lord, the better you will handle every single situation and circumstance that life brings your way!
  1. Be consistent with your daily quiet time and be in The Word.
  2. Keep God with you throughout your day.
  3. Let God prioritize your day! Don’t give HIM your to-do list… give it up to HIM and I promise you, what MUST get done will get done… in perfect timing!
  4. Take a look at all you do in one day and ask God if there is anything you can delegate or anything you have taken on that HE is not intending for you to do in this season. If He shows you anything that falls into these categories, give them up.
  5. Give yourself a “time-out” when you need it to re-center and focus and not be “grumpy.”

The stronger your relationship is with your husband, the better you will handle every single situation and circumstance that your kids bring your way! 

  1. Submit to his authority and let him handle the big stuff…. even while out-of-town.
  2. You both need to be on the same page with boundaries and consequences (good and bad) with the kids.
  3. Clear expectations need to be set with the kids. We call it our family’s “culture” and I highly recommend drawing up a family constitution together with the kids so that everyone has input and understands what is expected of them.
  4. Woo your husband even {and especially} when he is out-of-town.
  5. Stay positive and know that this, too, shall pass!

Philippians 4:11-12

I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.

I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation,

whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.

Philippians 2:14

Do all things without grumbling or arguing

God calls us to be content in all situations and circumstances. That is not an easy task, but it IS possible through God! I know how hard it is to stay content when you have so much pulling at you and you feel as if you have the weight of the world on your shoulders. Where we get into trouble is when we start doing things for people and not for God. You are not here on this earth to please your husband, kids, friends, or even your boss! If you truly are living to please our Heavenly Father, that will help you maintain the proper perspective no matter what curve balls get thrown your way! Yes, people might not like what you do or how you handle something, but as long as you know that your actions, words, responses (not reactions) are in line with God’s Word and His commands, that ultimately is what matters.
Remember, feelings can be so deceptive! If something happens and you feel out of sorts, the first thing you need to do is ask yourself…
Is this really a BIG deal? {If your answer is yes OR no: Why is this hurting my heart? What “button” is this pushing?}
  1. Check your heart condition! {Most of the time if something happens that is small but our reaction is BIG…. we need to check the condition of our own heart}
  2. Go to God and let Him fill that space! No one else needs to own what is yours to go to God with!
Dear Lord, comfort my sweet sister and help her to know that You are always near and ready for her to run into Your arms when she is feeling overwhelmed, over tired, and over burdened. Strengthen her and help her to find the balance she so desperately needs. I pray that You strengthen her marriage as they are one accord and may YOU always be at the center of every decision and conversation, Father. Direct their steps and keep them all safe when Mr. AB is out-of-town. I thank you in advance for all you will do! In Jesus’ mighty name I pray, Amen. <3
Blessings,
Coach Megan 🙂 

Lady in Waiting: Wait – Ditches of Discontentment

 

“Then Naomi said, ‘Wait, my daughter, until you find out what happens. For the man will not rest until the matter is settled today’” (Ruth 3:18 NIV).

Wouldn’t you want to have a mother-in-law like Naomi on your side to give you words of wisdom when it comes to matters concerning marriage?  Especially when the most eligible bachelor in town has told you that He would do whatever you want.

Waiting for what you want is difficult but it is the most rewarding thing any single woman can do in order to avoid discontentment.  So many of us have been led on by men who made promises which they knew they would not keep.

Jackie Kendall and Debbie Jones address ways that we as women have been defrauded by such men of ill intention.  The word to defraud means to excite physical or emotional desires that cannot be righteously fulfilled.

Many of us have fallen prey to men who have whispered sweet nothings to us and we have been led to believe that we are the center of their world only to found out later on that we were not the only ones these words were being spoken to.  I know of a man who called every girl “sweetheart” or “sweetie”.  When asked how many sweethearts he had he explained that he called his sister “sweetheart” so he considered every girl his sister.  Imagine the heartbreak of the girls when they heard that he thought of them as his sisters and not something more.

There is a recent type of defrauding that is going on called “friends with benefits” where boys and girls especially in colleges, or young men and women do not set any boundaries as to what they do in their relationships.  They even move in together and live as if they married.  The sad part about this set up is the emotions that a young woman puts into such a relationship.  I don’t believe a young woman can live with a man, share everything including a bed and say that such a relationship has “no strings attached”.  There are strings attached to this, where you like it or not, your heart is not detached to you when you are living in this environment.  A woman cannot be honest with herself if she says she is content living in this situation.  What happens when the man decides he is not ready to move this further and he is happy with the status quo?  Where does that live you?  Honestly which man wouldn’t be happy when he finds hot food on his table every time he arrives home from work or class, clean clothes nicely folded for him to pick and wear?  You literally wait on him hand and foot yet the only word he said was “let’s move in together” and not “let’s get married.”  The man gains everything at the expense of the woman who gives more than herself to play house with a man.

Unfortunately, this scenario is not only found in Hollywood movies but even among the Christian circles.  Many single women are falling into this trap which only leads to discontentment.  The Lord does not want us to sell ourselves short because we feel time is not our side.  Let us wait upon the Lord and He will give us the desires of our hearts.  Running ahead of the Lord will only lead us to discontentment and we will want to dig a hole and hide because we find ourselves in a situation where we wonder how we got there in the first place.

Naomi did not want Ruth to be overly excited and begin making orders for her “Vera Wang” wedding dress or choosing who is going to be her maid of honor or to begin planning a guest list.  She wanted her to wait and see how things will turn out with Boaz.  This is one woman to be applauded for having such wisdom.  Imagine if the other kinsman redeemer was willing to redeem Ruth and she has already told the world who she was going to marry!

When we are in a dating relationship, it’s so difficult to heed to the wise words of others; we seem to be walking on cloud nine and whenever someone says something we do not like we close our ears and words of wisdom enter through one ear and go out of the other ear.  It’s like all over sudden we are deaf to advise.  All we want to hear is how we look great together and how beautiful our children will be.  We only surround ourselves with people who agree with us and not those who want to tell us to slow down and concentrate on building a friendship.  It’s sad to hear “I told you so” when we come face to face with failed relationship.

As our writers clearly puts it:  “Another way a guy may defraud a woman is by emphasizing the future potential of the relationship rather than focusing on the present opportunities for the friendship to grow. This way of defrauding incites feelings in a woman that cannot be properly fulfilled at that time. This creates emotional turmoil for many women, making it difficult to wait with contentment. Postpone talk of a future together, marriage, or what kind of home you want, until engagement. Do not encourage talk of things that “might be,” but rather encourage words and actions that develop the present friendship.”

Let us not fall into ditches of discontentment by allowing every Jim and Jack to mess with our hearts.  Don’t become too desperate so as to fall prey to their schemes.   Let us guard our hearts because out of them springs of water will flow.  Let us wait for what God has in store for us for Proverbs 10:22 says “the blessing of the Lord brings wealth, and he adds no trouble to it.”

LET’S PRAY

Father, we thank you so much for you love us so much that you want us live a life that is full and content.  Jesus came that we should have life in abundance.  However, we also let the enemy use others to come and steal, kill and destroy the joy and contentment that you died for us to have.  Help us to take back this joy so that we may wait patiently for what you have for us.  In Jesus Name Amen.

YOUR ASSIGNMENT

A contented woman has the ability to lay down the terrible burden of always needing life on her terms. Are you a contented woman? (Read Judges 21:25, Luke 1:38, and Matthew 26:39.)

Be Blessed,

Jackie

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For the “Lady in Waiting” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

Lady in Waiting: Contentment (Reading Assignment)

 

Precious girlfriends, how are you doing?  I hope you are allowing the truths that we are learning in this Bible study transform your life to the glory of the Lord.  I am so blessed to hear from some of you how the study is making you grow into the women that God wants you to be.  I can also testify that this book is life changing and I am learning so many new things from each chapter.

This week we are going to learn how to become a Lady of Contentment.  This chapter will help us answer questions like – How does one become content as a single woman in a world full of couples?  How do you help a friend who starts planning a wedding just after a first date?  Have you been defrauded by yourself or a boyfriend?  Do you know what the Eleventh Commandment is?

The Apostle Paul in Philippians 4:11-13 teaches us the Secret to Contentment.

“I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.  I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty.  I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.  I can do everything through Him who gives me strength.”

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Here is our reading assignment for Week 8

November 19:

Lady of Contentment / Torture of Desire / Capacity to Wait – Michelle


November 20:

Wait / Ditches of Discontentment – Jackie


November 21:

11th Commandment / Prenuptial Fantasies – Tonya


November 22:

Spiritual Monitor – Tonya


November 23:

Mystery of Contentment / Stop Arguing with the Umpire – Diane

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LET’S PRAY

Our Heavenly Father, we thank You each day for leading us to this Bible Study.  Thank You for teaching us new truths that are helping us become the women You desire us to be.  As we continue in this study, we ask You to continue to transform our minds so that we can be content with our lives as the Apostle Paul was.  We ask all this in the wonderful name of Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior.  Amen.

Be Blessed

Jackie


For the “Lady in Waiting” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

Please email Christi@girlfriendscoffeehour.com if you have any questions, or if you have a private comment that you would like to forward to one of our bloggers in regards to their post that day.

The Resolution for Women — Weekly Overview

Well, how was your first week with The Resolution for Women?  Were you able to make some changes in your life, or at least see some areas where changes are needed?  I know I did!  I saw a few things!

Our Memory Verse of the week:  

Yet true godliness with contentment is itself great wealth.

1 Timothy 6:6 (NIV)

Monday we talked about making “every bite count” and enjoying your life where you are right now!  Taking the time to smell the coffee, and enjoying what God has given you; scraping up every last crumb of that amazing dessert!  No matter what age you are, there is still time to start enjoying your life TODAY!  Resolve to make that change in your life; spend more quality time with your husband and children, and move on from there.

Tuesday we talked about the “secret” to contentment.  Do you remember what the secret is?  Choosing to recognize that God has already supplied us with everything we need in life, and choosing to be perfectly content with what He has already given us.  Only then will we be able to fully engage in life in a way that we never have before….living life to the fullest.

Wednesday we talked about His “overflowing blessings”.  Here we learned how to be more comfortable with giving, because we have learned that God’s got our back, no matter what!  To use the abundance that He has already given us to give to others, and not to worry about “what if I run short by giving what I have to someone else”.  This was truly an eye-opening chapter for me!!  How about you??

Thursday we talked about the “balancing point”.  Again, another eye-opening chapter, for me!  What is true contentment?  Priscilla describes in so many different ways in this chapter, but the one that I liked the best was this, “It’s a balance.  A holy equilibrium.  A genuine gratitude for what the day brings, all the while maintaining a controlled anticipation for tomorrow may offer.”  I LOVE that!!  Having gratitude for today, and a “controlled anticipation” for tomorrow!  Meaning, not allowing ourselves to get ahead of God and begin to worry about tomorrow!

I don’t know about you, but I have learned a lot in this section of the Resolution for Women!  Be sure to go back over this first section once more, before we head into next week.  Highlight areas in each chapter where you feel God is speaking to you about.  Then pray and ask Him to help you resolve to become increasingly satisfied in your life, as Paul was.  Ask Him to teach you to be content.  As Paul said, being content is a process that we need to learn.  It isn’t something that just happens overnight.  But it is something that can be learned!

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Next week, our topic is “Purposefully Feminine — a resolution to champion biblical femininity”.   Another awesome chapter!
 
Have a Great weekend Ladies!  See you again on Sunday! 
 
Living Intentionally for Him,
Christi
 
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Let’s pray:
Father, thank You so much for the lessons we have learned this week.  As Paul learned how to be content in all things, Lord, we ask that You help us learn to be content in all things, as well.  We understand that in our own power, it can’t be done completely, but through You, Lord, we can truly learn to be content!  We thank You Lord for what You are doing in our lives through this study.  We ask special blessings upon Priscilla Shirer, the author of this book, for the work she put into writing this amazing book!  We love You Lord, in Jesus’ Name, AMEN!
 
After reading today’s blog, please return to our Online Bible Study Group on Facebook for your daily activity!  ♥  You just never know what we have in store for you!
 
 
If you are not currently a part of our Online Bible Study group, and would like to be, please send an email to GirlfriendsCoffeeHour@gmail.com, and we’ll be glad to add you!

The Resolution for Women: Overflowing Blessing

Memory Verse for this week:

“Now godliness with contentment is great gain”

1 Timothy 6:6 (NIV)

I’ve heard it, you’ve heard, it we have all heard it – in fact, we have probably heard it time and time again throughout our lives.  “If you give, you will get it back ten-fold” , “You will reap what you sow”, “Bless and you will be blessed”., Yes, we’ve all been raised on a variation of Luke 6:38 and its a scripture that doesn’t lack understanding.  God promises if we give, we shall receive.

I have a friend who has struggled most of her life with addiction.  However, even during these times of addiction I watched her stop to help strangers time and time again.  At one point downtown she ran into someone that had a dog with a health problem and right there on the street she showed the owner how to correct it.   I’ve watched her change tires for people on the side of the road, get gas for a vehicle that ran out, and not think twice about passing out cigarettes from a pack that someone just had to buy her because she didn’t have a dime to her name.  She just GAVE without thinking, even in the state of addiction.  This was the goodness very few people saw in my friend.  She was a [quiet] giver and do-er – nothing was publicized or bragged upon – this was just who she was.  She gave with total contentment.    As I helped her pack up her house to go into treatment and worked along side of her to get ready to go, all she could think about was making me a special steak dinner to thank me.  I didn’t want her to spend her money on me; however, the last night in her house she had dinner waiting for me and we ate on a small table covered with a white towel – all because she wanted to give in appreciation.  I am sitting here with tears in my eyes thinking about that night – here she sits at rock bottom, leaving her son and all she has right now to go into treatment – but all that was important to her that night was ‘giving’. – giving with total contentment.  How many of us give without thinking?  How many of us have to stop and evaluate, pray for a few days, and then decide if we have enough to give?  Where are we in our level of ‘giving’.?

Now, Where is God in His?  OVERFLOWING  is the only way to describe it.  As Priscilla says, “His gifts are overflowing. He’s not stingy with His goodness or ungenerous with His supply”  YES, He fills us up with far more than we started with, far more than what’s fair ~ He fills our cups until they runneth over and can no longer be contained – when we choose to give, this is His promise.

AND, it’s even larger than that……Days when we are at our lowest points, when we have given all we think we can possibly give – if it is God’s Will  and we feel that ‘nudge’  but we just don’t know how we will find the energy to give with the desire of Our Heavenly Father’s heart – He will simply bust up inside of us with all of His power and through HIS power we’ll get it done.  He provides us with every need to follow his request. Do you get those ‘nudges’?   Those nudges that are ever so slight,  but oh so powerful;  that you just KNOW it is a request coming from above and not just random voices in your head?  WOW, I do……  More often than not, I feel my Father telling me – “Now Kelley, you know you need to do this’.  It’s then I know there is no further questioning what is expected of me. It is also here when I must understand and find peace within, KNOWING that giving contently and carrying out this desire of my Father’s heart will provide me with an over abundance of blessings – when we take what little we have left inside and are willingly able to give that away, God promises, it truly will come back to us in unimaginable amounts – in blessings beyond belief.  How absolutely amazing and beautiful our God is.  He never ceases to amaze me with His Love for us.

Remember, every day starts with a choice.  We can be content or discontent ~ let’s make the resolution right now to be CONTENT, let’s intentionally live our lives each and every day being content -content in giving, content in doing, and content being a Christ Follower.  Try this and watch the blessings flow – be prepared, anticipate, and be ready to pour yourself out at the drop of a hat, the nudge of Our Father – whether we are weary and tired, full of energy, or lacking – remember, He will provide so we can provide.

HOMEWORK:

Based on God’s provision that you listed at the end of the last chapter, what is the one thing you could close this book and go do for someone else out of that resource?

Let’s pray:

Dear God,  Thank you for the ‘nudges,  for pushing us ~sometimes not very comfortably~ into being the Christ Follow we need to be. For teaching us to live in contentment rather than discontented.  Thank you for providing us with the strength when we are weak, for smiles instead of frowns, for sunshine instead of rain – for taking care of each and every detail in our lives, preparing us to carry out your requests to give contented. We love You, Honor You, and prayerfully make the resolution today give with a content heart. <3 Amen

Question of the day:

When you consider your level of willingness to give of yourself, does it reveal more contentment or discontentment residing in your heart?  In what way?  Let us know below –

After reading today’s blog, please return to our Online Bible Study Group on Facebook for your daily activity!  ♥  You just never know what we have in store for you!

If you are not currently a part of our Online Bible Study group, and would like to be, please send an email to GirlfriendsCoffeeHour@gmail.com, and we’ll be glad to add you!

Praying you have a beautiful, blessed 4th of July holiday.  Remember today the soldiers that continue to fight for our freedom and our country every day of their lives.

Live  Intentional, Live Content

Hugs, Kelley

The Resolution for Women: The Secret

Memory Verse for this week:

“Now godliness with contentment is great gain”

1 Timothy 6:6 (NIV)

I am speechless. Dear Priscilla…….. I, Megan Smidt, am SPEECHLESS!!!!!

I don’t even know what to write. There is no way I could add anything of importance to what Priscilla penned on the 6 pages that make up the section of Chapter One called “The Secret.” If you have not read it yet, I BEG YOU to stop reading my words, pull out your Resolution book, and read pages 17 to 22. Go now. I’ll wait…..

Ok so I just gave you pleanty of time to read this all for yourself. Now….. let’s chat.

I was a retail sales manager for over 10 years and I was good at it. It was my job to motivate people to sell things to other people wether they needed it or not. I’m not talking about a $30 handbag either…. the handbags I sold cost anywhere from $500 to $10,000. I decided I couldn;t do it any longer when my boss came to me a few weeks after 9/11 complaining about our sales numbers. She urged me to make my sales people “play up” feeling better about life and the state of our world by buying things to make them feel better. While we were living in the midst of complete uncertainty about EVERYTHING, I was supposed make my sales people prey on our customer’s insecurities, fear and doubt to get them to buy stuff to give them a false sense of security.

I couldn’t do it.

I was recruited to a higher paying retail job managing “secrets” of another kind involving lots of bras and panties. I didn’t work there for very long though, as I was more needed managing my newly acquired full-time household of 7.

Philippians 4:12-13

12 I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry,whether living in plenty or in want. 13 I can do all this through him who gives me strength.

Priscilla states: “When you’ve concluded that what you already have on hand is enough, that it’s adequate- that it’s been deemed by God as sufficient- then you’re EQUIPPED and EMPOWERED to participate fully in the tasks set before you during this season of life.”

Do you know that you can BANK on that? Really, deep down in your soul, do you TRUST that God is not only capable of providing for you but He wants to give you even more than you need to be able to EXCEL at His purposes?

This is Biblical, my friends, and I urge you to let this sink into your heart. Priscilla shares with us that “God has already given enough. He always does. And when you and I choose to recognize this and TRUST in His continued supply, we’ll be able to engage in life in a way we never have before. We’ll finally be living life to the fullest.”

THAT is the secret. WE MUST RESOLVE TO BE CONTENT!!!

Please, please, please DO NOT keep it to yourself!!!!! Really let this penetrate into every crevice of your heart and soul today. Spend time with this TRUTH and I urge you to spend a good amount of time in prayer with your Heavenly Father before beginning today’s homework.

HOMEWORK:

When you are ready, begin your journey to contentment by making a list. Label one side “My Needs.”  Label the other side “God’s Provision.” Then match up your needs with the way God is currently meeting them. Place your list in a handy place for the times you are tempted to lean toward dissatisfaction.

Let’s pray:

Dear God, You don’t ask us to do anything in Your Word that isn’t possible through You and through having a deep, intimate walk with You. Thank you for this perfect provision, Lord, and I pray that TODAY is a new day for every woman who reads this blog who is struggling with trusting You with every aspect of her life. Speak boldly into her life today, Lord! Wake her up to your perfect provision so that she can FINALLY be all You have created her to be for YOU to get all the glory Lord! You want more for us than we could ever come up with on our own for your love is truly extravagant…. more amazing than anything we could try to replace it with of this world. Help us to only seek satisfaction through walking intimately with You within Your will, God, and help us to boldly share the  perfect provision found only through You with every life we encounter. We are believing for INCREDIBLE revelation today, Father, and I pray that none of us will EVER be the same again as our eyes are now open to YOU being the only satisfaction that could ever quench our thirst. We love you and we thank you. In Your Son’s matchless name we pray, amen <3

Question of the day:

What might God be trying to grow in your character or cement in your relationship with Him by keeping you separated from some of the things you want but don’t have yet?  Please share your thoughts about this in a comment below!

After reading today’s blog, please return to our Online Bible Study Group on Facebook for your daily activity!  ♥  You just never know what we have in store for you!

If you are not currently a part of our Online Bible Study group, and would like to be, please send an email to GirlfriendsCoffeeHour@gmail.com, and we’ll be glad to add you!

…AND don’t forget to also follow my husband Craig and I’s blogs as we are writing about this journey daily here:

Me: www.glorytoglorylifecoaching.wordpress.com

Craig: www.adversusmundi.wordpress.com

Many blessings, dear friends,

Megan 🙂