December 23, 2024

Lady In Waiting: Introduction to Meditations

December 7, 2012 by

Diane

Just like anything else, if you keep God out of meditation there is absolutely no point in doing it.  Meditation is defined as a written or spoken discourse expressing considered thoughts on a subject.  I find it HIGHLY important that discourse is defined as written or spoken communication or debate.  Meditation is not about feeling relaxed or a place where you can be calm.  Meditation is an opportunity for YOU to communicate with GOD about any subject you or He would like to discuss.  It is easy to think it is about us: our calmness, relaxation, peace from our craziness.  When in reality, it is all about being with and sharing with our Divine Lover, Jesus!

When you sit down for quiet time what does it look like?  Is your cell phone right next to you just in case your future husband decides to call you while you are trying to hear from God?  Are you alone or in a crowded coffee shop because even this is an opportunity to be seen by God’s man for you?  More importantly though, can I ask you what your heart looks like?  Is your heart open for what the Lord wants to share with you?  Are you willing to be patient and not leave your quiet time until you hear from God?  Does your heart desire to soak in all that God has for you in this moment?  We must empty of “ourselves” and fill up with the Spirit of the Lord!

This week we have been talking about patience.  I was looking forward to this week because this is where I most struggle.  Can I be honest with you ladies; I have not read one blog post this week so far.  Despite feeling the need to read what these women have openly prepared for us to read, I want to wait until I am ready to open my heart for the words God speaks through each and every one of their fingertips.  My heart wasn’t ready for what may be revealed in those posts.  I struggle with the waiting part of being single.  I do not so much struggle with actually being single, just with thinking I will be single forever.  I believe that as much as we are to be patient with God, He is always willing to be patient for us.  He is waiting for me to open my heart to the hearts of the ladies that have shared this week in our study.  He is waiting and His Spirit is praying for me that I will talk with Him about my struggles with patience.

I truly believe the best meditation with God is when we have the ambition to be beyond honest with ourselves and with God, trusting that no matter what the true state of our hearts are at that moment, it is safe to say God will surely transform them into more like His heart when we commune with Him.  He rejoices in the moment we turn to Him for communication.  Just like our Father in Heaven waits patiently for our hearts, so we wait patiently for the heart of the man He is preparing perfectly for us.

I plan to spend quiet time with God, when I know I am ready to get rid of all hindrances, reading the blog posts from this week.  Praying that God will bring out the important truths that I need to let sink into my heart.

Throughout this study of A Lady In Waiting, I just know each one of us struggled with something more than another.  That something more for you, please go back to this weekend or whenever your heart is ready to.  Go back to the chapter; go back to the blog posts for that week.  Most importantly go to God in meditation.  Seek His face in your time alone with Him.  Find out what is in the way of your heart being controlled completely by the perfectness of God and give it over to Him once and for all.  You will find in your moments of complete surrender God’s loving presence.

I pray that we take advantage of the opportunities in the back of the book for meditation with God.  As you work through each meditation, open your heart but also open your ears that you might hear what the Lord has been patiently waiting to whisper in your ear.  I promise it will be just what you need and it will sustain you in the struggles of singleness.

Let’s Pray:

Father God, I thank You so much that we have the privilege of talking to You every moment of every day.  I ask that You prepare the hearts of each and every one of these ladies for the words You want to speak to them.  I ask that they can clearly hear from You.  Lord, Your faithfulness and patience truly take my breath away!  Your love for us is incomprehensible.  I pray that inside of all of us is a desire to spend time with You, growing closer to You, and feeling Your presence in our lives making You more and more real to us.  Bring to light the area we struggle most with and help us to have the courage to spend time talking with You about this area.  I pray all of these things in Your precious name, Amen.

You’re Assignment: 

Look back on your journey through this study.  What are you struggling with still?  What area of your life is God not present in?  Go back to that chapter or topic, and spend a lot of quiet time with God being honest with Him about these struggles.  Ask God to make your heart ready to hear from Him.  Let His presence fill where that struggle once was.

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Our Next Single Women’s Online Bible Study

“Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul”

by John & Stasi Eldredge

Begins January 6, 2013

To sign up for this Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to studying “Captivating” with you!!

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A Daughter’s Worth Week: 10 / Day 1 – Have a Story to Tell

December 3, 2012 by

When I was younger I was never certain I was going to Heaven.  I asked Jesus into my heart when I was five, but I could not say without a shadow of doubt that I would go to Heaven one day.  I was not ready for what that simple prayer I prayed at the wee age of five would do for me.  Though, I soon found out what I was not doing for that prayer.  There were days I would pray that prayer over and over, worrying that I said it wrong or didn’t mean it and had to keep saying it to make sure that there was no chance I was missing out on Heaven.  I spent a decent amount of time praying that God would save me, but from what I was not sure, and from where I was praying-no clue, all I was sure of was it was not coming from the sincerity of my heart.

Today, I can confidently say that I belong to God, and that I will be in Heaven one day.  It took me a long time to believe those words in my heart.  What about you?  Do you believe that you will be in Heaven one day?  Do you belong to God’s family?  If there is even a hint of doubt in your answer to those questions will you please reach out to a leader or pastor!  I cannot begin to explain to you the importance of praying with your heart the prayer of Salvation.  Simply believing that God sent HIS ONLY Son to DIE on a CROSS for YOU AND ME and then ROSE from the DEAD three days later; asking for forgiveness of your many sins and accepting JESUS into your HEART to help guide you and follow HIM, will not only guarantee your entrance to the gates of Heaven one day BUT it is also the start of the perfect story you have with the GOD of the UNIVERSE!

Have you ever thought about your story?  God already has a beautiful story written for you and Him to share together.  In this story you will grow closer to Him, learning to depend on Him for all of your needs.  Everyone’s story is different.  Everyone’s story has potential.  We are the ones that have to choose to embrace the pages of our stories.  It is not enough to just sit back and watch the pages turn.  We must act out on what we feel in our hearts.  We were told to read Acts 22:15-16 today.  Let’s take a look at it.

You will be his witness to all people of what you have seen and heard.  And now what are you waiting for? Get up, be baptized and wash your sins away, calling on his name.

Do not get discouraged if you have not seen or heard from God lately or ever!  It is never too late to change your path and go another way…leading to Jesus.  The more time you spend with Him in prayer, reading the Bible, getting involved in church, etc. the more you will see Him and hear His gentle whispers in your life.  This life is short.  Those of us who know Jesus and call on His name, we are all saved by the blood of Jesus.  We will all get to live the life we were intended for in Heaven with Jesus one day!  Until then, we MUST flee sin and run into the Lord’s arms!  We must take advantage of this life as short as it is and use it as an opportunity to share our stories with others.

I know for certain God did not save me from a life of complete misery just to leave my story on a pretty shelf.  He saved me so that I may share my story; being a light to others and helping others find Jesus as they hear each chapter.  Today, I leave you with a piece of my story; I pray that you share pieces of yours in our discussion group!  One thing I know is that when we let God into our hearts, he transforms our stories into something amazingly beautiful!  I cannot wait to hear what God has done and will do in each and every one of your lives!

Little Tid-Bit of my Love Story with God

I am so thankful that I asked the Lord into my heart when I was 5.  Even though I was not certain what that meant, the Lord heard my words and he never ever left my heart especially when I turned from Him.  When I turned from Him it was the worst time in my life.  One night after too much heartbreak, I cried out to Him and asked Him to help me.  I was not expecting anything but to my surprise, God heard my cry, and helped me.  He protected me and saved me from a life of misery.  He is faithful!  I rededicated my life to the Lord. He is the love story I was always searching for.  I always thought I needed a man, but they all left me feeling empty inside.  When I embraced God, I found His love that fills every possible crevice in my heart and overflows into the lives of so many others that need so desperately to find HIS love.

*****

Let’s Pray:  Dear Heavenly Father, thank You honestly does not seem like enough to show the gratitude I have in my heart for what You alone have done for each and every one of us.  I ask that any girl who is reading this post and does not know You as her personal Savior, will find You and start embracing Your story for herself.  I ask that each one of these girls feels confident in the salvation You have given them, freely.  I pray that these girls truly live out the story You have prepared for them.  Bring opportunities into their precious lives to share their stories with others.  We love You Lord, oh so much and we cannot wait to see You in Heaven one day!!  Amen.

Love to my dear sisters in Christ,

Diane

For the A Daughter’s Worth Online Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Please email GCH_Decaf@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information.

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Winning Him Without Words: Speak Words of Grace/Receive Grace

November 15, 2012 by

Speak Words of Grace

Words. Boy do women use their words! Dr. Louann Brizendine, clinical professor of psychiatry at the University of California, San Francisco states in “The Female Brain” that “A woman uses about 20,000 words per day while a man uses about 7,000.”  The poor guys can barely get a word in edge wise! But ya know what, I think they prefer it that way. Remember what we learned a few chapters back, men are physical beings. The show their emotions through doing, not talking.

But not us, ladies. We will talk until the cows come home, or at least until we think our point is made, whichever comes first. When it comes to arguing, our words can become mind numbing to our men. After awhile, they just shut down & try to find a retreat! That is why it is important for us to find the right words to convey what we are trying to say. When there is a conflict in your marriage that needs to be discussed, it is wise to discuss it with God first.

“A man of knowledge uses words with restraint, and a man of understanding is even-tempered.” Proverbs 17:27

Ask God to give you the right words to reach your husband, to help him to understand your point of view. Use fewer words and words that hold meaning. Your husband will listen harder and comprehend more if you aren’t droning on and on without ever making a clear point. Just because you are disagreeing on something does not mean you have to use hurtful and insulting words either. Choose words of “faithfulness, loyalty, friendship and honor” like Dineen learned to do. Remember what Dineen’s friend shared with her: The words of his queen make him a king. That has really stuck with me and makes me want to really choose my words wisely. To seek God for his guidance before even pursuing an issue with my husband. I am making James 1:19 my new mantra:

 Understand this, my beloved brethren. Let every man be quick to hear [a ready listener], slow to speak, slow to take offense and to get angry.

Receive Grace

Alright, now we know how to speak words of grace to our husbands, but how do you speak to yourself? Are you continually beating yourself up? Telling yourself you aren’t pretty, smart or thin enough? Are you still hanging onto regrets from your past? Well I am here to tell you to stop!

Ladies, let’s address this self-image problem first. God created you to be exactly who you are. You are a woman of God. You are beautiful in his eyes, inside and out. Don’t put down God’s creation!! My nose is a bit large for my face, but I love it because I inherited it from my grandfather. My grandfather has been gone for 11 years, but I still can see him in ME and that gives me great comfort. Can you do that? Can you take one of your “problem areas” and embrace it?

And what about regrets. I’ve had a few… to quote Frank Sinatra. Who hasn’t! None of us are perfect and a lot of our regrets are part of the growing up process. I held onto some regrets for a long time because of my tendency to dwell in guilt. But one day God just shook me up and told me He knew I was going to do those less than pleasing things before I did them. It was all part of my life’s path. Without those regrets, I would have nothing to learn and grow from. God knows you, he knows everything you will do or say before you do it because He has painted your path ahead of you. Ask for His forgiveness and he will give it to you in an instant. But the kicker is, you then have to believe you are forgive and MOVE ON. You can’t keep coming back to it over and over because that is telling God you don’t truly believe you are forgiven. Meditate on this verse for help:

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation, the old is gone, the new has come.

2 Corinthians 5:17

Repent and believe he has restored you. You are now a new body in Christ and He has such great things planned for you!

Let’s Pray

Dear Lord, Life and death is by the tongue. Help us to learn this lesson and take hold of its meaning. Put a guard on our tongues and a filter in our minds before we speak so that every word coming from our mouth is one that is pleasing and affirming to you. We love you, Lord and want to speak only the words that are sweet to your ears. In Jesus precious name, Amen.

Your Assignment:

One word I have deleted from my vocabulary is “hate”. I no longer say things such as “I hate my thighs” or “I hate so & so”. That word has always been a strong and mean word to me and I just don’t want to put it out into the world. What are some words you can delete from your vocabulary?

In our house we do not say “I can’t.” We can always try our best, but we will never start off by saying “I can’t.”  What are some words you can delete from your marriage?

Godspeed,

Sarah

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For the “Winning Him Without Words” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

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A Daughter’s Worth: Week 7 Day 1 – Families Sometimes Struggle

November 12, 2012 by

Ummm…girls can we be real with each other, like really real with each other-especially in this chapter of our book.  Nobody comes from a perfect family.  As much as the idea of living in a huge home with a white picket fence around it appeals to each and every one of us; truth-be told if you took down the walls of that house: inside it wouldn’t be all roses and gumdrops!  NO WAY and can you imagine if it was, you would never have a need for God now that would make for one sad and lonely household.

One thing I have learned from trials in my own family is that when they come (and trust me they will) they make me realize that I need God on a moment by moment basis.  If we went through life without pain how would we know joy?  If we went through like without feeling hopeless how would we know the amazing feeling of hope that comes from God alone?  Family trials are not intended to destroy us or break our families apart; they can be used to grow closer to God and for us to come to terms with the fact that we always need Him.  The Lord is here for us, he desires to help us.  Do you believe that today?

Hebrews 4:16:

So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God.

There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most.

Do you understand this verse?  Sometimes I think back to my teen years and remember not fully understanding most of what I heard in church.  Let’s break apart this verse and try to figure out why it is so important to seek GOD alone in our struggles with family.

Let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God.  How do we come boldly to God?  We do this when we pray.  We think of the requests we have.  I know when I was your age I prayed a lot that my sister and I would get along.  I prayed that my brother would not be mean to me.  I prayed that my parents would not argue as much.  These prayers did not seem like a big deal.  I did not expect anything to come from these requests.  When we pray to God, when we seek Him for help, we must be bold.  We must not be afraid to share with God exactly what is on our minds or hearts.  After all, God already knows what you are thinking so do not be afraid for one minute to approach God with your requests.  This is not just anybody we are approaching here-it is God and more than that it is our GRACIOUS God.  The one who gives generously and the one who loves to hear from us.  When you have a trial in your family first bring your requests boldly and with confidence to our gracious God who loves you so much!

There we will receive his mercy.  Mercy is compassion or forgiveness.  When we turn to God with confidence we are turning to our Friend.  As our Friend, God has compassion on us and He forgives us for all of the times that we mess up big time.  If we so freely receive HIS forgiveness for the times we mess up big time (lying, not being kind, raising our voice, disobeying our parents, etc.) shouldn’t we do the same for our family members and everyone else for that matter when they hurt us?  The answer is yes just so you know.  Trust me, I know this is not an easy task.  When we are in the middle of that long drawn out voice raising battle with our parents the last thing we want to do is forgive them for the hurtful words said.  Do not be discouraged if this seems impossible.  When we come to God and share with Him our hurt, it is God who then helps us to show mercy to that same person who hurt us.  We know how amazing God’s forgiveness is, and we should desire for others to experience His forgiveness too.  When we choose to forgive them, they are able to experience a sliver of His forgiveness!

We will find grace to help us when we need it most.  Grace and mercy go hand in hand.  God’s grace though is one of the absolute coolest things.  I do not know if you know this or not but when we mess up and God loves us still-that is His grace at his finest.  How many times have you gotten into a fight with your parents?  When you are in the fight the last thing you are thinking is you love each other.  BUT after hours or days you realize you really do still love one another.  Well, kind of the same thing with God: except God loves us no matter what, it does not take him hours or days to come around, he loves us in the moment, no matter what that moment may be.  Because God loves us that much and because He is in that moment with us, we have access to His help instantly.  You are not alone.  God is waiting patiently for you to seek Him for help.  He will always help you.  This is a promise from God.

As I said earlier, trials in our families will come that is certain!  It is up to us to let God in to help us through each trial.  I encourage you to share this post with your family today.  I encourage you to make a pact to one another that when the messes in life happen, that you will vow to live out this verse by seeking God first for help to have mercy and grace for one another.  God blessed you with each one of your family members to do life with.  Let us thank Him for their purpose in your life and make the most of the days you have to spend together!

Let’s Pray:  Lord, I thank you so much for family.  I thank you for giving us whoever we have in our families to love and be there for each other.  I thank you that we can turn to you when we need you and you will always be there for us!  I am so glad that you hear us when we pray to you.  Let us remember to seek you for help and remember to offer others grace even when we feel they do not deserve it because you offer us grace every day!  We love you so much!  Amen.

Love you girls!!

Diane

*****

For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information.

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Lady In Waiting: What If It’s Too Late?

November 9, 2012 by

I am not going to lie to you ladies; this will be the hardest thing I probably ever have to write about.  Furthermore, when I saw that I had this part of the chapter to write about I instantly felt sick to my stomach.  Then I prayed, and I know that God gave me this topic for a very special reason.  This is His way of telling me, you are ready to share such an ugly part of your life with others because of the beauty you have let Me make of it.  It is my prayer that as you read this you can get past the ugly my life once was and focus on the beautiful things that God has made from my messes in life.

I can tell you this topic alone has brought so many tears to my eyes; probably enough to make an ocean-no joke.  The past week I have been thinking to myself this part of the chapter is so personal, how can I possibly begin to share what God wants me to share with these women when I don’t want to even share it with myself?  Then I am reminded of Revelation 12:11 They overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony.  There is power in our testimony ladies.  There is hope from our hopeless situations, purity can come from our impurity, and the only reasoning for these miracles is because of the victory we have over Satan and the only reason for THAT is BECAUSE of the beautiful sacrifice of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.  And that my friends, is how I can share what God so desperately wants you to hear today.

When I read the words on page 89, my heart sank.  “If you are reading this after the fact and are dealing with the guilt of the lost gift, do not be discouraged”.  The first time I read that it was about two years ago and I was very uncertain of how to not be discouraged.  Second time around, and two years later when I read that sentence I was overwhelmed with thankfulness to God that I am no longer dealing with the guilt of the lost gift.  What changed in two years you might be wondering?  Honestly, I changed.  Not because of anything I did, it was all because of what God did for me, on a cross.  He died and shed HIS innocent blood and took my guilt and shame away with Him.  Ladies, GOD DID THE SAME THING FOR YOU!  In those two years, I accepted personally what HIS gift meant for me; the new life I have freely been given!  My past did not change, but I chose to change the way I was living.  I chose to start embracing God and when I did I was no longer discouraged.  Have you done the same?

If you are reading this after the fact, please listen closely.  I understand the guilt, I understand waking up and feeling covered in shame.  I understand the pain behind every single tear that falls from your eyes.  I understand the pain of a broken heart.  My heart was broken … correction, shattered when someone who I loved took my innocence from me without asking my permission.  My natural response to this was not “this is all his fault for doing this to me”, instead it was “this is all my fault for letting this happen”.  I suffered with extreme guilt and it led me to turn completely away from God.  It was too late for me; I could no longer be a virgin when I got married like I had always dreamed of so I gave up.  I believed and lived out this lie for two years, living in sin.

One day the Lord placed A More Beautiful You by Johnny Diaz into my life.  I was driving along; crying because of what I had just done, that I knew was so wrong, but I just did not know how to stop going back to that sin.  Out of nowhere, seriously nowhere, my preprogrammed country station became a Christian radio station, K-love in my car.  This is what I heard:

So turn around you’re not too far
To back away be who you are
To change your path go another way
It’s not too late, you can be saved
If you feel depressed with past regrets
The shameful nights hope to forget
Can disappear, they can all be washed away

By the one who’s strong, can right your wrongs
Can rid your fears dry, all your tears
And change the way you look at this big world
He will take your dark distorted view
And with His light, He will show you truth
And again you’ll see through the eyes of a little girl

My heart ached to hear those lyrics over and over again, but my tears got in the way.  I searched for that song for hours after hearing it and could not find it anywhere on the Internet.  Those lyrics God used to start to mend my broken heart.  But that was just the beginning of the mending.

I could not get over the fact that even though I did not choose to lose my virginity, I CHOSE TO KEEP GIVING MYSELF AWAY TO A MAN AND THEN MEN WHO WERE NOT CONCERNED WITH MY HEART, JUST MY BODY.  I fed into the lie that I needed this sin to be a part of my life.  I fed into the lie that I was indeed damaged goods.  These lies were so hard to get rid of.  What lies do you believe about your past?  What is tangling you up inside, making it seem impossible to get past the sins of your past?

PLEASE TAKE A MINUTE TO LET THIS TRUTH RUN THROUGH YOUR SOUL: No matter what your past may look like, all God sees is beauty.  Truly, if you are a child of God, if you have asked for his forgiveness for your mistakes, then you are living a beautiful new life!  God does not see the shame or guilt that weighs so heavy on your heart-He just sees your heart for what he created it to be.  His love is never out of reach no matter how far you have gotten yourself from accepting it.  God has the luxury of forgetting our sins, and we have the luxury of being forgiven and able to live our life filled with God’s love. 

Here is one of many examples of the beautiful things got has brought out of my ugly!  My heart was almost healed.  There were still some things I had to confess to God.  I walked into therapy with my pink journal in hand.  Each page was filled with sentence after sentence of pain, hurt, shame, guilt, sin, and ugliness.  I read aloud each page.  I ripped out each page and put it in God’s hands (literally my therapist drew God’s hands on a piece of paper and sat it against the wall).  As I was done with each page I prayed aloud to God.  I wanted to see His hands so I looked up, at that very instant His hands (the paper) fell over everything I had written.  That was the sign I needed that God loved me so much and that He took all of my shame and pain and guilt with Him where it belongs and left me with a brand new heart!  I am pure, I am a virgin, and I am not damaged, thank you Jesus!

Let’s Pray:  Dear Heavenly Father, thank you for your love.  Thank you for forgiving us and transforming our ugly past into such a beautiful life with you!  I pray that every single person reading this takes away the thing that you had planned for them to hear!  I praise you for the opportunity I have been given to share my heart with others.  I pray your many blessings upon each woman who has felt, it was too late for her.  I cannot put in words how thankful I am for healing our broken hearts!  We love you so incredibly much!  Amen.

Your Assignment:  If you are holding anything in from you past, get rid of it.  Please write it down and put it in God’s hands.  Let’s replace that space with God’s love!  Let’s be each other’s support system when temptations come or when we are starting to go backwards.  Please post below what God tells you when you are feeling bad for you past, I believe these words have the power to encourage and help each and every one of us!

Love you all so much!

Diane

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For the “Lady In Waiting” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

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Winning Him Without Words: Weekly Review w/ Martha Bush

November 9, 2012 by

 

He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”  Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.  [2 Corinthians 12:9]

Trade perfection for authenticity is what Dineen asks us to do in Chapter 6.

Not to sound “holier than thou,” but I aced this chapter.  A perfectionist, I am not!  In fact, that is the character trait that divides by husband and me the most.

Oh yes, he is the perfectionist in the family.  He cleans up most of the things I start because, as he puts it: “You made a mess of this!”  It drives me nuts.  Perfection just isn’t a word in my vocabulary.

I believe there is no room for perfection in our spiritual lives either.  So, I ask you ladies:  “Do you really think you can live this Christian life before your husband perfectly?” “Do you really think those old fleshly flaws within you aren’t going to occasionally pop up?”

“Come on, ladies, you need to get real!”

Authenticity says:  “Yes, I goofed, that is why I need a Savior!”

Authenticity says:  “I need to stop putting up a front before my husband, and ask his forgiveness when I mess up.”

Authenticity says:  “I’m not intimidated to speak about the passion I have within me for my Savior in front of my unsaved husband.

Oops!  I guess I didn’t ace the chapter after all.

Oh, God, forgive me.  I now see that the passion I have within me for Jesus needs to spill out of my mouth “naturally.”  I know not to preach and nag at my husband, nor run my mouth off like a “religious freak.”  But, I now see that I have become unbalanced in my efforts to say “not a word,” and have quenched my passion for you.

I hear you saying, “Come on Martha, you need to get real!”

“Let your passion for me flow out of you like a soft stream of water flowing along the river bands – -sweetly and soothing.”

And now, let’s review what Beverly, Jennifer, Donna, and Sarah had to say about Trading Perfection for Authenticity.

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Weekly Review

Monday:  Perfection for Authenticity / A Fine Linen Belt – Beverly had tried to be the “perfect” wife to her husband for years.  But, this week, she learned a lesson through Jeremiah’s linen belt. God had instructed Jeremiah to take his belt off and hide it in rocks near a river.  When Jeremiah retrieved the belt, the elements had ruined it and it was completely useless.

Beverly compared this to allowing certain “elements” to damage our relationship with our husbands to the point that we are no longer being the living representation of Christ in our homes.

Beverly challenges us in the following ways to reflect and show our husbands God:

Our heart – -what is in there

Our minds – -what she is thinking

Our soul – -what are our desires

May we accept the challenge.

Tuesday:  A Confession – Jennifer asks us some thought provoking questions concerning how we live our lives in front of our unsaved husbands.

How often do you let your husband see the not-so-Christian parts of you?

Do you fear that you might “look bad” or “un-Christian” if you are authentic?

Do you think you might give Jesus a “bad name?

Jennifer suggests reasons why we might be having problems in this area, such as:

My husband might laugh at me

My husband might mock me

My husband might say I’m not really a Christian

My husband thinks I should be perfect if I’m a Christian

My husband’s words might hurt my feelings

Jennifer challenges us to:  Lay down the idol of perfection.  We cannot be an authentic warrior for Christ if we pretend to have it all together.  It is through our authenticity that Christ uses us to reach other people with the Good News of His saving grace.

May we accept this challenge.

Wednesday:  Heart Tablets – Donna points to the scripture Dineen brought out in 2 Cor. 2:3 as humbling her.  In this verse, God says we are a letter from Christ to our spouse.

From this verse, Donna saw that the Spirit of God has reached down and written on her heart.  These reflections from her heart can now be reflected to her un-saved loved ones who does not listen to fleshly efforts of nagging, crying, begging, and anger when she witnesses to them.

Donna makes a very valid point to think about:  Would you listen to someone who is hassling you?  Would you see a loving, caring God in that kind of tone?

She challenges us to:

Take a step back in our marriage.

Don’t worry about planning what to say or do next.

Let yourself be God’s love letter to them.

May we accept this challenge.

Thursday:  Sacrificial Giving – Sarah, uses Dineen’s idea of the perfect gift to give our husbands for Valentine gift, instead of chocolates.  It comes in the form making a listing of the things that she would not do to her husband anymore.  Just plain and simple:

No Nagging

No Expectations

No False Assumptions

No Resentment

Sarah leaves it with each of us to determine where in stand on these matters.  It is definitely food for thought as a means of Sacrificial Giving.

May we expect the challenge and do likewise.

Friday: Discovery/Prayer – Father, God, I thank you for what you have taught us about being real this week.  Help us to get rid of any hang-ups in our lives that are preventing us from representing Jesus before our husband, be he saved or unsaved.  Help us to live our lives before him according to 1 Peter 3.  In Jesus name, I pray, Amen.

 

Your Assignment:

Think back over the week and name one thing you definitely know you should start immediately doing to be authentic with your husband.

 

Have a blessed day,

Martha

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For those who are reading this blog and would like to join the Bible study, we would love to invite you to join us!  Click here and follow the instructions, (you can also click the SIGN-UP link in the menu bar above to be taken to the form). It’s that simple!  We hope to see you soon!

Above all, if you have not accepted Christ as your Lord and Savior, and would like to have someone pray with you, please email us at Prayer@GirlfriendsCoffeeHour.com. and one of our prayer team members will contact you.

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Lady in Waiting: An Advantageous Position

November 2, 2012 by

This chapter makes me think of my sister so incredibly much!  Reading through the story of the married lady you may think-no way does married life really get that crazy.  Now, I am not married, but my sister is, and I can assure you that the story in the book is not even close to as crazy as it really gets being married and having children running around.  Trust me, I have experienced the crazy right alongside of my sister and honestly if it wasn’t for the grace of God-there would be no way she could get through her day without putting her children and husband up for adoption.

My sister and I are very close and very similar.  We both strive to live our lives for God alone.  We both cry at the same things, and laugh at the same things-mainly each other.  We share similar passions.  We encourage one another and are both thankful we are sisters and have each other to go through life with.  There is one thing about us that makes us very different as we live out the lives God has planned perfectly for each one of us- she is married with three ADORABLE children (I know I am biased but they truly are the most adorable kids in the universe) and I am single living in a perfect little apartment all for me.

There are so many times that my sister and I will be talking on the phone (me usually whining on the phone) in the midst of living out the difference in our lives and she will mutter the words, enjoy being single while it lasts because when you are married you won’t have time to yourself.  This is usually said after I go on and on about the fact that I am single and alone and wondering how I am ever going to find the man God has for me if I am sitting home, alone talking to her.  Meanwhile, my sister on the other end is wishing and praying for some sort of miraculous thing where time freezes just for her kids and husband and she can move around doing what she wants and needs without them just for even a minute will do.

I am always reminded of a few things when I talk to my sister in these moments:  living out married life with kids is a lot different than the married life with kids we dream of when we are single.  By enjoying single life she doesn’t want me to enjoy the fact that I feel like a loser sometimes, she wants me to enjoy the time I have with God alone and make the most of that time.  Married women want what single women have-not so much singleness, but aloneness: time to spend alone with God or with a good movie without any interruptions of motherhood and being a wife.  In the same way single women want what married women have: a husband to come home, give us a kiss, ask us how our day was, and to spend our evenings with him and not alone.

The fact of that matter though is that GOD IS CALLING ME AND YOU TO SINGLENESS FOR THIS SEASON OF OUR LIVES.  WE MUST NOT WANT SOMETHING WE DO NOT HAVE.  WE MUST EMBRACE THIS TIME IN OUR LIFE, WE MUST USE OUR TIME THAT WE HAVE ALL TO OURSELVES AND SHARE IT WITH GOD, YEARNING TO HEAR FROM HIM AND GROW CLOSER TO HIM.

My sister will be the first person to tell you that marriage and motherhood is such a blessing and gift from above.  You NEVER want to trade those blessings and gifts for anything.  She will also be the first to tell you that being a wife and mommy makes spending time with God a little more of a challenge.

As a single woman, I am telling you that the only thing that keeps us from taking advantage of the TIME we have to spend with God daily (distractionless) is the whining we do in our minds, the unrealistic dreams we will not let go of.  There will come a day when most of us will not have the luxury of one-on-one time with God without a husband needing socks, a poopy diaper needing changed, and the Bible you are so desperately trying to read being chewed on by a teething little child.  So let us make the most of the time we do have to put all of our attention and focus on the one and only satisfaction to our hearts desires.  You are where you are for a reason, married or single-God still desires to spend time with you.  And as a single woman of God it is our hearts desire to be concerned with living our lives for HIM ALONE.

LET’S PRAY:  Dear Heavenly Father, I thank you and praise you so much for the time you give us every day to spend with YOU!  I pray that in the midst of our singleness we do not become distant from you, but instead we use this time to grow closer to you.  Prepare our hearts for whatever lies ahead for us.  Help us to take full advantage of our single days-with you.  I love you so much Jesus!  We pray all of these things in your HOLY name, AMEN.

YOUR ASSIGNMENT:  List everything you want in your life.  Give that list to God, literally take that list and pray to God about everything on it.  Then put the paper in a safe place.  Ask God to turn that list of your wants into HIS LIST OF HIS WANTS.  As time goes by, compare the lists.  See what has changed and what you have been living out for Him all along!

Love you ladies!!

Diane

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For the “Lady In Waiting” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

 

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Lady In Waiting: Finding the Priceless Pearls

October 26, 2012 by

 

When I looked at the schedule and saw I had this section of the chapter to talk about with you ladies, I was ecstatic!  I am pretty sure this is my favorite chapter.  When I read, A Lady in Waiting years ago, I wrote down this sentence from page 61: From the time you wake in the morning until you go to bed at night, set your heart’s desire on exalting Him.  This paper is sitting in my nightstand drawer.  Every time I read that sentence I pray that I am able to do just what is says that day.  Through the years I have learned what exactly it means to exalt God.

I have not always exalted God.  In fact for three years of my life, my heart’s desire was not for God; it was for a man who I tried to make my God.  I lived to honor this man, I lived for this man, from the time I woke up in the morning until I went to sleep at night I made this man a huge idol in my life.  This was the absolute worst time in my life.  He was very abusive, controlling, manipulative, and to put it simply, his heart’s desire was to destroy me and to sit back and watch in slow motion as he painfully ripped every single one of the pearls away I had received from God the day I accepted Him into my heart.  The worst part was I could not defend these pearls he was taking so viciously from me, because I had no idea they existed.

When all I was left with was an empty strand where beautiful pearls once laid, it was my turn to add new pearls.  Instead of adding God honoring pearls to that strand, it slowly started getting corrupted with ugly pearls of drunkenness, provocativeness, impurity, idolatry, outbursts of anger, carousing, anxieties, depression, and honestly I could probably go on and on.  I did not know what God honoring qualities and character looked like for me.  I saw it in other people, my sister and grandmother especially.  They wore their pearl necklaces proud as they should, and I was happy for them and others who did just that, but I had lost all hope for myself.  I truly believed it was too late for me.  I never thought the day would come where I would wear the pearls God has been preparing for me.

I can very thankfully and happily say that today, and every day, I stand confident in the pearls that God has picked out just for me.  I found them all, some I had to work so hard for, others he so graciously gave to me.  One pearl on the strand I think I am most thankful for is, LOVE.  There are no words this side of Heaven to describe to you the benefits and satisfaction in God’s love.  This is one pearl I never have to work for.  God’s love is there for me, even when my strand was covered with sin, His love was still there, on the other side of the clasp, but still, IT WAS THERE!  One pearl I still struggle with is self-control.  When I read this book, years ago, I wrote in the margin, WORK ON SELF CONTROL.  For whatever reason I ignored that note since it was written years ago.

This is what I learned when I saw that note staring in my face the beginning of the week.  We all have access to the God honoring qualities and likeness he teaches us about in the Bible.  Yes, they are beautiful pearls.  But, for whatever reason, we sell ourselves short.  We believe the lie that we are not good enough for God’s best.  We know of the qualities and pearls we can have in Christ, but we choose or settle for the qualities or pearls we have grown accustomed to in this world.  We go for the dime store pearl necklace when waiting for us is the priceless one in Heaven.

Exalting God is when we put aside the dime store necklace we have felt comfortable with and set our eyes and hearts above to the ONE and only who will give us the pearls HE desires for us.  Exalting God is when we let the Holy Spirit fill us with the pearls we are so deserving of from up above.  Exalting God is when we praise Him and honor Him with the pearls he has provided us with to treasure on our “necklace of virtue”.

Let’s Pray:

Father God, I thank you and praise you so much for the priceless pearls that you have for each and every one of us.  I pray that as we continue this study we strive to exalt you every moment of every day.  I pray that each and every one of us on this journey is able trade in the dime store necklace for a necklace of virtue so graciously given to us by Your Spirit.  Thank you for going along this journey with us.  I pray our heart’s desire YOU alone.  I pray all of these things in your precious name, Amen.

Your Assignment:

What is your heart’s desire?  Spend some time today being honest with God about what pearls you have on your necklace.  Tell Him what ones you want to remove, tell Him what ones you need help getting to their full potential.  Think about what exalting God means, and desire to spend your days doing JUST THAT.

Love you ladies all a super bunch!!

Diane

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For the “Lady In Waiting” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

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Have you accepted Christ into your heart?  Is His Spirit living inside of you?  If you have not, but would like to pray, please contact our prayer team at prayer@girlfriendscoffeehour.com .  Someone from our prayer team is waiting to pray with you! 

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Resolution for Women: Living w/ Grace Weekly Review

September 21, 2012 by

Because He Gave His Everything

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This week, we’ve been talking about living with grace in our home.  Learning to just say “okay”.  Learning how to use WD-40, better known as GRACE, to loosen up a bit and not be so rigid in our expectations.  Then we ended the week in learning how to find that Sabbath Space in our home.

We could focus on grace here on out, if we wanted to; which is technically what this chapter was about.  But I want to focus on something else today.  WHY we are able to offer grace.  Because of Jesus and what He did on the cross.  He gave His everything in order for us to walk in grace and offer it to others.

His sacrifice was the ultimate act of grace!

Today, I want to Praise Him!  I want to shout His name on high.  I want to thank Him, and bring all glory and honor to Him, for that sacrifice of grace.

I’m not sure if we will ever truly comprehend the price He paid to show us grace, until we meet Him eye to eye.  The ultimate sacrifice of being scourged for our sins; of being nailed to that cross….FOR YOU AND I.

GRACE ….

GRACE …

GRACE …

Because of Him and what He did for us that day in Calvary, we CAN offer grace to those undeserving.  There is no reason for us to think otherwise.  He paid that ultimate price to give us the ability to love those undeserving, and offer them grace.

GRACE …. Because He gave His Everything!

The resolution this week calls us to cultivate a peaceful home where everyone can sense God’s presence not only through acts of love and service, but also through the pleasant and grateful attitude with which we perform them.

Next time something in your home calls for grace…and you don’t think you can offer it …. think of what He did on the cross for YOU and how undeserving you were for that sacrifice.  Then extend the same kind of grace to others.

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Let’s Pray:

Jesus, we love YOU so very much!  We thank You for the ultimate sacrifice You paid on the cross that day in Calvary.  Jesus we would be lost without You; but because of You giving Your everything, we can face tomorrow and live eternally with You!

Thank You Lord.  Some days there just doesn’t seem to be an adequate way to say thank you for the deep sacrifice that You paid.  But Lord, my heart is full today; it is alive; and I am alive today because of You!  I give You all my praise, glory, and honor.

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If you don’t know Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and Savior, please write to us so we can get in contact with you today to share the Love of Christ with you, and walk you through a prayer to accept Him into your heart.  We love you!  He loves YOU!!

You can email Robin Packer, our Intercessory Prayer Ministry Leader, at Robin@GirlfriendsCoffeeHour.com.

Robin will contact you and pray with you.

Thank you for joining us this week.  I pray the blogs this week spoke to your heart, as they did mine!

We love you, and so does He!!

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Reminder… on October 1st, we will begin our brand new Online Bible Study, entitled “Winning Him Without Words” by Lynn Donovan and Dineen Miller.  If you are in an unequally spiritual marriage, you won’t want to miss this study!!

To sign up for this study, please send an email to: Womens@GirlfriendsCoffeeHour.com and we will send you all the details you need to get started!

Now jump on over to our Facebook Group for the daily activity!! If you do not yet belong to this group, and would like to, send us an email atGirlfriendsCoffeeHour@gmail.com with FB GROUP in the subject line, and we’ll be glad to add you!

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Resolution for Women: Off Broadway

September 19, 2012 by

 

For the law was given through Moses,

grace and truth came through Jesus Christ.

John 1:17 

 

If you didn’t read today’s chapter, you’re probably wondering what in the world a can of WD-40 is doing in our blog today!!  If you did read it, you will know exactly what it’s meant for!  Read on…..

When I read the script Priscilla mentioned in the first part of this chapter, I have to admit that I was feeling a bit uneasy.  Why?  Because I felt like she was talking about the script that was written about my home a few years back.

The Lord is really working in me the last couple of weeks.  Last week, we talked about loving our kids; and the difference between loving them and being their friend.  This week, we are talking about grace in the home.  This chapter, we are talking about expectations / grace within the home.

I admit when I first moved into this home, I had no experience being a step-mom.  I have been a step-child before, but never a step-parent.  I had good and bad experiences as a step-child.  I learned, or rather I thought I had learned, what to do…and what not to do.  But, as life would have it, I realized very quickly that I hadn’t learned anything about step-parenting.

I had it in my head what I thought my new home was going to be like.  My husband and I talked a lot about what my responsibilities would be.  I thought I was going to just walk in and everything would just be peachy-keen!  Not!!

I can go back now and see the reason why things didn’t go so smoothly.  I was bullheaded.  My expectations were extremely high, especially when there had been NO expectations prior to me living in our home.  ANY expectations that I would have had would have been considered too high because of the lack of expectations before me.

To me, I wanted the kids to understand that I was just doing what their dad wanted me to do.  To the boys, they just wanted me to go away, and leave them to do whatever they wanted, as they had been doing for almost two years.

I was an intruder.  I was a spy.  I was a tattle-tale.  I was the enemy in their little world that had been so rudely interrupted!

Grace?  We didn’t know that word back then.  None of us did.  We were one of the most dysfunctional families in the neighborhood.  Neighborhood?  Nooo, in the whole town it felt like!

I expected the fairly tale setting.  I would move in.  We would all love each other.  We would all get along.  We would all have a great time.  And so on…..  WRONG!!!

I and everyone else in this family found out rather quickly that was not to be!

My expectations were to have respect for each other.  You did what you were told to do.  You didn’t bad-mouth each other.  You, in no way, showed violence.  You kept peace in the home.

Some may say that doesn’t sound like my expectations were too high.  But in this home, it was, only because it had never been reinforced before.  Now I come into the home and I was reinforcing these things, and the troops were not happy, at all!!  I was truly the enemy.

I admit now that I blew it.  My expectations should have been adjusted to a lower level, until we learned about each other.  Instead I just marched in and laid down the law.  Wrong way to go about things.  That blew up in my face, and it caused a lot of heartache for all of us.  I take the blame for that.  If I could go back and do it all over again, I would totally do things differently.

The lesson I learned is that each individual in your home has certain capabilities.  The expectations of that person should be based on what that person is truly capable of giving.  No individual should be forced into doing something they are not capable of doing, no matter what.  It should begin with teaching that individual first.  No one can do what they have not learned.  How can they?  They have yet to learn what is expected of them.  They Will Fail!!  And so will YOU, if you insist on them performing something they have yet to learn!

Re-evaluate your expectations of those in your home.  Re-evaluate how you can adjust your expectations to what is capable for each person in your home.  Don’t set the expectations so very high that no one will be able to reach it.  If you do, YOU will be hurt, disappointed, and more!  You will not achieve what you hope to if your expectations are not attainable.  Yes, I agree that we sometimes have to stretch our expectations to help our self and others strive for success.  But, what I am talking about here is setting the expectations so high, that no one can attain them …. To YOUR Satisfaction!

If you want peace, fun, laughter, acceptance, love, and a well oiled family unit, whip out the WD-40 (GRACE) and start spraying the areas where the expectations are too high, so you can loosen up a bit!  Don’t be a drill sergeant like I was!

 

Be a woman resolved to show grace in your home! 

 

Grace is the smile that everyone in your home is waiting to receive from you.

 

Truly if you use the grace card in your home, you will see much better results that I did when I first moved in here.  Today, we still struggle with past hurts because of how high the expectations had been set, and unmet.  We’re a work in progress, but by the grace of God, we are much better than we were back then!!  Praise God!!

 

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Let’s Pray:

Lord, I lift to You each person who is reading this today, and maybe struggling with expectations that are too high in their home, or their work environment.  Maybe they are the ones with the high expectations.  Maybe they need to loosen up a bit.  Maybe they need to learn how to use grace in their home or workplace.  Father I ask You to give them wisdom and discernment on how they can show grace to each person in their life, or how they can set the right level of expectations for their home, or workplace.  Lord, forgive us for the times that we have expected way too much from others.  Forgive us for the times that we have tried to force our expectations onto others.  Help us give grace to those who need to learn from us.  In Jesus’ Name, AMEN.

 

Your Assignment:

Tell us about an area of your life where your expectations need adjusting.  How will you go about changing them, and why?

 

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Reminder… on October 1st, we will begin our brand new Online Bible Study, entitled “Winning Him Without Words” by Lynn Donovan and Dineen Miller.  If you are in an unequally spiritual marriage, you won’t want to miss this study!!

To sign up for this study, please send an email to: Womens@GirlfriendsCoffeeHour.com and we will send you all the details you need to get started!

Now jump on over to our Facebook Group for the daily activity!! If you do not yet belong to this group, and would like to, send us an email at GirlfriendsCoffeeHour@gmail.com with FB GROUP in the subject line, and we’ll be glad to add you!

 

Living Intentionally to Show God’s Grace,

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