April 27, 2024

Winning Him Without Words: Weekly Review

 

Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.  (Proverbs 22:6)

One Sunday morning many years ago, I stood staring out my kitchen window, contemplating on not going to church any longer with “just me and my two little girls.”

Three months had passed since we had moved from Atlanta to New Orleans. My husband had been offered a job opportunity he felt he couldn’t afford to turn down.  During the process of our lengthy talks about taking the job, I said to him:  “I’ll go with you anywhere you feel we need to go; it is just so hard for me to move with two little girls to a strange city and have to take them to church by myself.”

To which he replied, “I promise you if you will make this move with me, I will go to church with you and the girls.”  And with that hope, we made the move.

Oh yes, he went the first Sunday to help me find the church, and that was the end of that.  As a young mother I felt so betrayed.

So, on this Sunday morning as I was about to give this church-going up for good, I heard little children in my neighborhood playing out in the street.  It was then I prayed:  “Lord, if he never goes to church with me, I commit to you this morning that I will go alone if I have to; I can’t bear the thought of my children playing on the streets on Sunday morning and not in church.”

And with that, the three of us began our journey, and today both girls and their husbands hold ministry roles in their church and are raising their little ones for Jesus.

I realize it doesn’t always happen this way.  When children become of age, they make their own choices and sometimes stray from their Christian up-bringing. But, I would encourage every mother to make the effort to teach their kids about Jesus and take them to church, even if it she has to do it alone.  It has its rewards—I am blessed. 

On a side note, my husband gloats over his children and grandchildren.  He has been the best husband and father any man could be with the exception of that “missing link of having Jesus in his heart.”  But, as Lynn and Dineen point out:  “God makes everything beautiful in His time.”

As we come to the close of our study in Winning Him Without Words, let me say it has been a pleasure reviewing Beverly, Jennifer, Donna, and Sarah’s blogs for you, our readers, each week.  I know they have inspired you as much as they have me.  Let’s take one final look at what they had to say this week on:  What About the Kids. 

 

Weekly Review

 

Monday:  Where to Start?  Before answering that question, Beverly talks about the thoughts most women have in a spiritually unequally yoked marriage, as Beverly was.

  • Am I doing things right
  • Am I teaching them the truth
  • Will they accept Jesus as Savior one day
  • Will they learn to be a prayer warrior
  • Will they love Jesus
  • Will they wake each morning with a desire to live every moment for Him
  • Will they seek a godly mate for their life
  • Will they love God’s Word and want to spend time getting to know Him

As most mothers, Beverly had thoughts on whether her children would continue living out their Christian foundation after her children were grown and left home.

But, even with these consuming thoughts, Beverly agrees with the answer in our book on page 170 of Where to Start:   “Help our love for Jesus be so contagious it can’t help but rub off on our loved ones and when our kids see us loving God in this way, they will love Him too!”

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Tuesday:  Teachable Moments:  Jennifer brought us to the reality of three main points we must consider if we are to have teachable moments with the children God has placed in our lives.

  1. There are limited moments in our daily lives. We only have 1,440 minutes every single day.
  2. Be ready for these moments.
  3. Create those moments if they are not spontaneously popping up on their own.

Jennifer challenged us to be alert to the teachable moments that will come into your life be it your own children, grandchildren, nieces/ nephews, cousins, etc. Pray that the Lord will open your eyes and your heart to these moments. Seek Him for how to respond; in all situations.  Show love and grace.

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Wednesday:  Start When They are Young:  Donna certainly believes in starting young in teaching and training children for the Lord as she did with her own children.

For starters, she:

  • Prayed before they were conceived.
  • prayed for them during pregnancy.
  •  prayed after they were born that she’d have wisdom to know them like God did and know how to raise them for His purposes.

After her children were born she:

  • taught them to pray at early age
  • no TV was allowed; only Christian radio
  • videos taught God’s word in song
  • read children’s book on their Bible heroes
  • prayed with them for healing of cuts and bruises

Donna knew she was to start out showing them Jesus as soon as they were born.  In addition she knew that her own faith should be lived out in every aspect of her life, every day before her kids.

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Thursday:  As They Grow:  Sarah points to us as parents the spiritual influence, positive or negative, we have on our children as they grow.

Because of some issues she and her believing husband had in choosing a church home, they did not attend church for a year. Her main concern during this time was how this was affecting her girls, ages 11 and 13.

I personally found the prayer Sarah offered at the end of her blog should be the prayer of all of us who desire to be a Godly influence on children as they grow.  Dear Lord, we want to make sure they continue to want to worship You, learn more about You and grow closer to You every day. This is a crazy world we live in, with many negative outside influences that are hard to keep away from our children. Help us in this effort Lord, to keep their eyes focused on You.

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Let’s Pray:   Father God, you have given us a precious gift – -children.  Help us all as parents, grandparents, children church leaders, aunts, uncles – -not let a teachable moment pass us by.  Give us wisdom to guide the children you have placed in our lives.  Above all, may these little ones love you with all their hearts, and live their lives according to what you have created them to be.

Your assignment:  Tell a child today that you love them.

If you have not accepted Christ as your Lord and Savior, and would like to have someone pray with you, please email us at Prayer@GirlfriendsCoffeeHour.com. and one of our prayer team members will contact you.

Have a blessed day,
Martha

*****We would LOVE to have your feedback on this study! Will you take a few minutes to complete the following survey? Your responses will help us create the best online bible study experience for you! CLICK THIS LINK to fill out the short 10 question form. Your responses are completely anonymous, I promise!! Thank you so much!*****

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Our next Women’s Online Bible Study

“Crazy Love” by Francis Chan

Begins January 6, 2013.

To sign up for this new Online Bible Study, click the link HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to learning about this “Crazy Love” with you!!

*****

Please email Christi@girlfriendscoffeehour.com if you have any questions, or if you have a private comment that you would like to forward to one of our bloggers in regards to their post that day.

*****

Winning Him Without Words: As They Grow

I am the mom of two girls, 11 and 13. Since my husband and I are both believers, I never had worried about us being good models for them, until we had trouble in our church.

Because of some issues we had, we did not attend church for a year. My main concern during this time was how this was affecting my girls. I didn’t want them to think not going to church was okay. I also didn’t want them to think changing your religion was something that should be done on a whim or taken lightly.

We had many family discussions about our faith during this time. My husband and I had private conversations about what having our daughters confirmed in a certain religion meant to us. Was it a necessity; was it okay to wait until they were older? All the while we were visiting other churches to possibly join and we just were not satisfied with our options. But I didn’t want to just “go” somewhere because I was worried about the confirmation issue. I wanted to find a church that would develop a love for Jesus in their hearts as well as teach them the importance of God’s word.

To make a long story short, we did find a new church home and it’s one our whole family is very comfortable in, even though it is not the type of church my husband and I were brought up in. Our new church home has a refreshing approach to the scriptures. Church is now something we all look forward to. My 11 year old is the most excited and has benefited the most from our change. This makes my heart so happy because I was very worried that entire year of being without a church that our actions were going to send them the wrong message.  They are at such a hard age. These pre-teen and teen years are so impressionable. But not so much by mom and dad anymore, instead they are more apt to want to do what their peers are doing. Thankfully my girl’s friends are all church going people; some attend our new church, which probably helped them to get on board. But I want you all to know that in my own way, I understand the worry you have over your children’s faith.

There was a moment during that year where we didn’t have a church that I worried my husband was not going to approve of any of the churches in our small town. He had kept finding something wrong with each of them. Then where would we be? When you are a believer, you NEED a church. Your family needs a church. It is VERY important for many reasons, and I worried about them all! But I did learn a few things during that year!

#1 was not to settle on somewhere just to be in a church.

#2 was do not push the subject with my husband! I really liked one church and my husband did not. If I would’ve pushed my opinions on him to try and make him “come to my side”, we would’ve ended up being miserable in that church too.

And finally, #3, continue to pray. I prayed every night that we would find a church for our entire family, and in God’s perfect timing, we found one.

It took an entire year and 2 visits to our new church, but we finally found our home, and we are all so happy there. It was the best reward for all of my praying and waiting.

Let’s Pray:

Dear Lord, as our children grow, we want to make sure they continue to want to worship You, learn more about You and grow closer to You every day. This is a crazy world we live in, with many negative outside influences that are hard to keep away from our children. Help us in this effort Lord, to keep their eyes focused on You. Help these women in unequally yoked marriages. Please let their children want to follow their lead and keep attending church. Hopefully they can be an example of how precious Your love is to their unbelieving father. In your precious son’s name, Amen.

Your Assignment:

As we end this study, I’d like to hear how God has spoken to your heart. Has anything changed in your marriage? Have you been able to minister to anyone else who is an unbeliever, or possibly someone in the same situation as you? Please share your stories below! I can’t wait to hear them!

Thank you for reading my silly rambles week after week! This is my final blog for GCH. 🙁 It has certainly been an honor to write posts on Winning Him Without Words! And I’m so grateful to have made many great, lifelong friends while doing it! God bless you all!

Sarah

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Our next Women’s Online Bible Study

“Crazy Love” by Francis Chan

Begins January 6, 2013.

To sign up for this new Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to learning about this “Crazy Love” with you!!

We would LOVE to have your feedback on this study! Will you take a few minutes to complete the following survey? Your responses will help us create the best online bible study experience for you! CLICK THIS LINK to fill out the short 10 question form. Your responses are completely anonymous, I promise!! Thank you so much!

Please email Christi@girlfriendscoffeehour.com if you have any questions, or if you have a private comment that you would like to forward to one of our bloggers in regards to their post that day.

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Winning Him Without Words: Start When They are Young

Train up a child in the way they should go,

and when he is old he will not depart from it. 

Proverbs 22:6

Raising a child can be a daunting thing, especially when we know that we are responsible to God for that little life! I know before I even conceived, I prayed for them. I prayed for them during my pregnancy. I asked God that He would guide me in raising them for Him. After they were born I prayed for wisdom to know them like He did and know how to raise them for His purposes. I felt so privileged to be able to do it, yet scared to mess it up!

I knew that God wanted me to start out showing them Him as soon as they were born. Even the youngest little person can learn to fold his hands in prayer. Children learn by repetition and imitation.  I remember doing this with them when they were just little toddlers of 2 or 3. Then they would also want to pray out loud too. Even though I couldn’t understand what they were saying, God did. And it was so cute!

You see, I think our faith should be lived out in every aspect of our lives, every day of our lives. Our kids see it, and they should. If it’s real, they will see it in every little area and all the things you do. I don’t think anyone, having encountered the Lord and come to the saving knowledge of Christ, can live a life that hides your faith. Your kids know that and see it from their birth. Children are very smart and perceptive. They know when you are sincere and when you’re not. They can spot a fake a mile away!

When my oldest daughter, Heather, was born, we didn’t have a television. We pretty much listened to Christian radio all the time. She learned all kinds of songs and stories by listening to the radio. And did she love to sing! She would go around singing them to her hearts content when she was playing outside or in. There were kid shows then on the radio like “Odyssey” in the evening. We had tapes (yes, cassette tapes!) with “Bullfrogs & Butterflies” that helped teach her, in kid language, how to become a new creature in Christ. We had videos (VHS!) of Psalty who taught her God’s word in song too. When she had a hurt or a scrape we prayed for healing and that God would take away the hurt. I read her numerous books about all the Bible heroes that taught her God’s word, like Daniel in the lions den. We bought her a Children’s Bible because she would see us reading ours and want one of her own. I was able to lead her to the Lord at the age of 3 because she understood by that age that she needed a Savior, I had taught her that. I believe that God speaks to children, no matter what age, if you bring them up to hear His voice. But I also believe that just living your faith in front of them makes the most impact on them.

There are so many things that you can do to start your children on the right path to God, you just have to look for them. And then pray for God’s guidance to implement them. He’s there waiting for us to ask for His hand, and He loves those little babies more than we do. Trust Him to do it and stand back and watch how these little ones respond to the things of God. It is amazing!!

Thank you for letting me be a part of your lives during this study. I pray God has touched you and helped you with your walk with Him and with your husbands. I have enjoyed sharing it with you.

In Christ’s love,

Donna

Let’s pray: Father we are so honored that you have given us the privilege of raising our little ones for you. I pray you guide us and direct our teaching so that our children will come to know you at  an early age. Give us opportunities to share your love for them often. May you open their hearts to your saving knowledge as soon as it can be taught. Thank you Lord for letting us do this. In Jesus Name Amen!

Your assignment: Share some ideas of how you shared Christ with your children when they were young to help them understand God and His word. We as mothers can use all the ideas we can get!

*****

Our next Women’s Online Bible Study

“Crazy Love” by Francis Chan

Begins January 6, 2013

To sign up for this new Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to learning about this “Crazy Love” with you!!

We would LOVE to have your feedback on this study! Will you take a few minutes to complete the following survey? Your responses will help us create the best online bible study experience for you! CLICK THIS LINK to fill out the short 10 question form. Your responses are completely anonymous, I promise!! Thank you so much!

Winning Him Without Words: Teachable Moments

There are limited moments in our daily lives. In this day of the smartphone, the countless activities with the kids, the full-time job, the dinner preparation, and sleep (if we are lucky!), we often are not intentional with how we spend our moments. But think about this – moments are here and gone in a flash. We only have 1,440 minutes every single day. How are you spending each of your minutes? Are you being intentional? Are you taking advantage of the teachable moments that arise with your children or nieces/nephews/other children in your life?

I love Lynn’s story about her prayer bus. She took what would normally be a mundane daily activity – driving the kids to school – and turned it into a time to connect with her kids. She prayed over their upcoming day with them and through this activity, her kids saw that her faith is real. She was able to teach them to rely on God and to turn to God for their needs as they went into their school day. What an incredible gift to her kids!

But we must be ready for these moments. And sometimes we must create them if they are not spontaneously popping up on their own.

Are you ready to drop everything when your son/daughter/niece/nephew/granddaughter/grandson/cousin/any other child in your life drops a teachable moment right in your lap? Often we are so consumed with worldly things and are not so attuned to what is right in front of us. We do not realize it right away…and then the moment has passed. The teachable moment is gone.

So, I challenge you this week to be alert to the teachable moments that will come into your life. Pray that the Lord will open your eyes and your heart to these moments. Seek Him for how to respond; in all situations, show love and grace.

Let’s Pray: Lord, we ask that You open our eyes, ears, minds, and hearts to the teachable moments that our children present to us each day. Help us to minister to their needs as they arise and to give them wise biblical counsel as You guide and direct us. Help us to faithfully guide these children you have entrusted to us, Lord, whether it is through our biological birthing of them or whether it is through adoption, familial relationship, friendship, or any other relationship. In Jesus name, Amen!

Your Assignment: Tell us about a teachable moment you have experienced with a child in your life.

*****

Our next Women’s Online Bible Study

“Crazy Love” by Francis Chan

Begins January 6, 2013.

To sign up for this new Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to learning about this “Crazy Love” with you!!

We would LOVE to have your feedback on this study! Will you take a few minutes to complete the following survey? Your responses will help us create the best online bible study experience for you! CLICK THIS LINK to fill out the short 10 question form. Your responses are completely anonymous, I promise!! Thank you so much!

Please email Christi@girlfriendscoffeehour.com if you have any questions, or if you have a private comment that you would like to forward to one of our bloggers in regards to their post that day.

*****

Winning Him Without Words: What About the Kids? Where to start?

Train up a child in the way he should go; and when he is old he will not turn from it.  

Proverbs 22:6

 

As we wind down this study we come to last section of this wonderful book and that is “What about our kids” in this journey of our spiritually mismatched marriage.

(what do we do? Where do we start?)

My kids were not the ones who went to church every week with two parents leading them into the church building, or praying with them, or reading the Bible with them, nope it was just me.   Now I am not complaining mind you, but it would have been “wonderful” for both of us to do the leading.

When I had children I was constantly thinking how in the world am I going to raise them in a godly home when the home was not a complete godly unit…and then I remembered how my granddaddy used to teach me saying “Beverly, there is nothing you can do about others, you must just work on yourself, love Jesus yourself, and as He teaches you then you teach them.”

I listened to him and just like I did the 9 years of my marriage before having children I did the same after the children were born……I went to church and took my children with me so they could learn about my Jesus, and learn about WHO will be and make the difference in their life as they grow up.

Even though I took them to church I constantly thought:

  • Am I doing things right
  • Am I teaching them the truth
  • Will they accept Jesus as Savior one day
  • Will they learn to be a prayer warrior
  • Will they love Jesus
  • Will they wake each morning with a desire to live every moment for Him
  • Will they seek a godly mate for their life
  • Will they love God’s Word and want to spend time getting to know Him

My children were learning about God and getting to know Him…both accepted Christ as Savior and then the first big day came when my daughter left for college and then all those same thoughts began creeping back in my head…..except a few different ones…now my thoughts were:

  • Will she remember what she learned growing up
  • Will she stick to the truth in this world of peer pressure
  • Will she not give in to the idea of dating just anyone but continue her commitment to seeking God for her life mate
  • Will she still remain in God’s Word

Oh so many thoughts were swirling around in my head and I could not seem to get enough of wanting to know that she was not straying from the path she was taught.

Then I got the call…the phone call….Mamma I met this guy that I really like….go to the school BCM website and look at his picture….he is so cute Mamma….and I told her hmmmm….let me take a look and so I did…..and my first thought was REALLY?  HIM?  (you know we all do that, those initial judgmental thoughts just based on someone’s looks)……and let me say right now……

 MY JUDGMENTAL THOUGHTS WERE WRONG

 This was the man God set aside for my girl….as her life mate….at that time he was the campus missionary at the college she attended and 3 years later they were engaged/married,  now he is the youth pastor at the church they attend…..and oh how God is moving in their life…..and just think if I had done my normal mamma meddling I would’ve been messing up God’s plan for her life.

So here we are, one child trained and on the path God set for her…..but still one more at home and still my same thoughts creeping in now for this one…

In his high school years my son began showing the same aspects as my husband (not wanting to go to church, I had to “make him go”)  and then the day came when he went off to college…..and here I go with my thoughts again…..and now these thoughts were way different from when my daughter left home….because now that he was in the thought process of “not wanting to go to church”  I knew that the peer pressure of the world would start sinking in heavy on him…..and yes that is where he is now…..NOT GOING….NOT SERVING….not following that path he had been taught as a child…..

 BUT….

 I have the wonderful promise of Proverbs 22:6 that I cling to that He will turn to it……and as he comes home for visits/holidays he sees me continuing to love and serve Jesus, he sees me living out what I taught him all the young years of his life.  He has watched me in times spent in study/devotion…..this has and is the silent witness to my son. He has heard me lifting him up in prayer to God–this is the audible witness to my son.

I await that day to see his faith has not wavered, that he remembers the training he received growing up and that he will make the Lord “priority” in his life.  And I await to see/hear when he says “yes Lord I am here ready to serve” I have not given up….

Oh, What a day that will be!

 So to answer the question of this lesson today; Where to start?   Here’s the answer from Pg. 170 of our study. Help our love for Jesus be so contagious; it can’t help but rub off on our loved ones and when our kids see us loving God in this way, they will love Him too!

 

Let’s Pray:   God I thank you for each lady that has been a part of this study and I pray that your love will seep out through our daily life in subtle effective ways that will influence our children, in your name I pray. Amen!

Your assignment:  Share any thoughts that God brought to your mind as you studied today’s lesson about our kids?

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Our next Women’s Online Bible Study

“Crazy Love” by Francis Chan

Begins January 6, 2013.

To sign up for this new Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to learning about this “Crazy Love” with you!!

We would LOVE to have your feedback on this study! Will you take a few minutes to complete the following survey? Your responses will help us create the best online bible study experience for you! CLICK THIS LINK to fill out the short 10 question form. Your responses are completely anonymous, I promise!! Thank you so much!

Winning Him Without Words: What About the Kids? (Weekly Reading Assignment)

“Your calling is simply to love this man in your life and love God with all your heart, mind, soul and strength. Leave the rest to God.” (pg. 166)

Well, ladies, we have officially read and studied through all 10 keys to thriving in a spiritually mismatched marriage! Let’s do a quick review, shall we?

Key #1: Know that You’re Not Alone!

Key #2: Don’t Save Your Husband – Save Yourself

Kay #3: Stay Connected

Key #4: Know the Essentials of Love: Hope, Joy, Peace and Trust (Oh, Yeah, and Respect)

Key #5: Believe Your Marriage is Blessed

Key #6: Trade Perfection for Authenticity

Key #7: Pick and Choose Your Battles

Key #8: Move from Hurt to Healing – Seasons of Marriage

Key #9: Keep Your Armor On – You’re at War!

Key #10: Learn When to Pray the Most Dangerous Prayer

I don’t know about you, but I have learned SO much with this study. This book is definitely one I will look back to again and again! I encourage you to read the conclusion today and then dig in to our final week starting tomorrow. I can’t believe it is almost over!

*****

The last week of our study, we are going to talk about the kids. What do you do in a spiritually mismatched home when you have children present? This has the potential to be a very touchy area in a marriage. This section of our book can be found in APPENDIX 1.

Here is our Reading Assignment for the week:

Dec 10 – Prov 22:6 – What About the Kids / Where to Start – Beverly

Dec 11 – Teachable Moments – Jennifer

Dec 12 – Start When They Are Young – Donna

Dec 13 – As They Grow – Sarah

Dec 14 – Discovery / Prayer – Martha

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Let’s Pray: Father God, as we go into our last week of this study, I pray that  you will open our hearts and minds to what you have for each one of us. For those of us with children or those of us blessed to have nieces and nephews or other children in our lives, Lord, we ask that you show us how to be a positive spiritual influence in their lives. I pray that you touch each child represented by every woman participating in this study and bless them as they grow into the men and women you created them to be. Help us to guide them and teach them in Your ways, Father. In Jesus precious and holy name, I pray, Amen!

*****

Our next Women’s Online Bible Study

“Crazy Love” by Francis Chan
Begins January 6, 2013.

To sign up for this Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to learning about this “Crazy Love” with you!!

We would LOVE to have your feedback on this study! Will you take a few minutes to complete the following survey? Your responses will help us create the best online bible study experience for you! CLICK THIS LINK to fill out the short 10 question form. Your responses are completely anonymous, I promise!! Thank you so much!

Winning Him Without Words: The Perpetual State of Waiting

I wait for you, O Lord; you will answer, O Lord my God.

Psalm 38:15

Waiting is hard to do when we’ve become accustomed to instant access to just about anything we want or need. So when we are waiting in line, waiting to speak to a human when calling customer service, waiting for good news, or bad…waiting on God, we become frustrated. Because when we send a prayer request to God it’s not like sending an email or text where we can expect an answer within minutes, or even within the day. God answers prayers in His own perfect timing.  Rarely that answer will come instantly, but most of the time we will be in that perpetual state of waiting for a while.

But Why Does God Make Us Wait?

THE TEST. In my own personal experience God likes to run me through a few tests before blessing me with an answered prayer. If I am praying for something like a bigger house, He wants to make sure I can take good care of my current home first. If I am praying for a job with more responsibility, God will make sure I handle the stress of my current job before he promotes me onto something that will likely be more stressful. If I can wait for my prayers to be answered with a good attitude and prove to God that I can handle what I am asking for, I can be sure that He will answer my prayer.

THE RIGHT TIME. You may think the timing is perfect to move, to get a different job, to have another child, but is it right in God’s time? God will sometimes make you wait for answers to certain prayers because it’s just not the right time yet. He, and only He, knows the right time for you to receive your blessings. When we do things on our own time, we’ll often be hit with setbacks and tremendous frustration.  When we wait patiently for God, all things will fall into place and run smoothly.

MOTIVATION. God also wants to make sure your heart is right. What I mean by this is God would love to give you all your heart’s desire, but He also wants to be certain that you don’t misuse your blessings. If your intent of praying for more money is only so you can feel superior above others, that would be a misuse of a blessing. Praying for money to support your family or to help your community is the right motivation for a prayer of prosperity.

These are just a few reasons God puts us in that perpetual state of waiting, but I think they give you a good understanding of why God doesn’t send the answers to your prayers instantaneously.  He is waiting on you. YES! God waits for you too! He waits for you to show Him you can be patient; He waits for you to show Him you will rely on Him for help when there are obstacles in your path, He waits for your heart to be right. So you see, it’s not just us that are doing all the waiting. He waits too.

Let’s Pray:

Dear Lord, we find it so hard to wait, but we do understand that everything has to be done in your perfect timing. Help us to be patient, Lord. Help us to use our waiting period to grow closer to You. Always let us know that it is Your will that will be done, not ours. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Your Assignment:

Reflect back on a time in your life when you prayed for something, but it wasn’t answered right away. When was that prayer answered? In hindsight can you now see why God made you wait for that answered prayer?

Godspeed,

Sarah

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Our next Women’s Online Bible Study “Crazy Love” by Francis Chan, begins January 6, 2013. To sign up for this Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to learning about this “Crazy Love” with you!!

We would LOVE to have your feedback on this study! Will you take a few minutes to complete the following survey? Your responses will help us create the best online bible study experience for you! CLICK THIS LINK to fill out the short 10 question form. Your responses are completely anonymous, I promise!! Thank you so much!

Winning Him Without Words – Prepared by God – Unanswered Prayers

GCH_Eph2_10

During the days of Jesus’ life on earth, He offered up prayers and petitions with loud cries and tears to the one who could save Him from death, and He was heard because of His reverent submission. Although He was a son, He learned obedience from what He suffered and, once made perfect, He became the source of eternal salvation for all who obey Him and was designated by God to be High Priest in the order of Melchizedek. Hebrews 5:7-10

Somehow, reading these verses, I feel strangely uncomfortable and comforted at the same time. I don’t know about you, but it makes me feel uncomfortable when I read that God let His son go through trials and problems so much that He offered up prayers and petitions to his Father. I mean he WAS God, why did He have to go through that? On the other hand, I find myself comforted knowing that He went through trials, just like me! And now I can send up prayers and petitions, too. I don’t think He, Jesus, actually had to go through them; he could have been born and gone through life without one problem or trial. But He chose to be like us, to show us how to pray and be an example of how God wanted to prepare us for our own battles.

I love this paragraph in our study that Dineen wrote: “In our trials, we can look to Jesus and see the pattern of preparation, and perhaps therein lies our joy-in knowing that the Father loves us as much as He loves His Son and is preparing us for the destiny He has planned for each of us, and for our husbands.”

What trials are you going through, or have gone through, in your life and marriage that you can look and see the hand of God in the midst? Perhaps God has asked you to stay the course in your marriage through very tough and heavy circumstances. Maybe He’s asked you to show love to a man who acts unlovable, maybe he’s defensive and angry. Maybe you don’t feel loved by him, but God has called you to love him as He has loved you.

God has equipped us for these and any other situations that might be presented to us on a daily basis. Let’s look at some scriptures that bear out this very thing:

* 1 Corinthians 10:13  No temptation has seized you except what is common to man and God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, He will provide a way out so that you can stand up under it. (NAS)

* 2 Timothy 3:16-17  All scripture is inspired by God and useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right. God uses it to prepare and equip his people to do every good work. (NIV)

* Ephesians 2:10  We are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus, to do good works which God prepared us in advance to do.

If we read these verses, and apply them, we know that not only is God preparing us, but He is equipping us for the battle, sometimes way ahead of it! Stay in the word, learn His way, and apply it to life. God does not say He won’t give us trials in this life.  He said we will have them, but He will help us and provide a way for us.  If the battle is short or long, He will be there for us.

We know that God hears us from the verse Dineen shared, Psalm 17:6  “I am praying to you because I know You will answer, O God. Bend down and listen as I pray” (NLT), but do we really believe it? Sometimes it seems as though God is not listening. We pray and plead and send up our petitions and it seems we’re hitting a wall. We worry that He doesn’t see our situation or hear us, but because of His word, we know He does. So we wait….

I know I’ve talked about my son and his addiction to drugs and alcohol and  rebellion before, but let me just expand on it for a moment. Tristan’s rebellion started when he was 12. He suddenly became this angry, unhappy person I didn’t know. It went on a downward spiral of drugs, alcohol, and girls. He was soon more interested in partying than school, or life. He ran away a few times, screamed that he hated me on daily basis and moved out for a time when he was 17. He only came back because he was hungry.

During this time, we prayed and prayed and prayed. God probably got tired of hearing my voice!! But hear me He did!  When Tristan turned 19 things started to change. He admitted his addiction and got help. He tells me everyday that he loves me, whether in a text or by mouth. He is 21 now and a productive member of society. He hasn’t come back to the Lord yet, but I’m still praying for that. But because we were in the word and had an active Christian life, God prepared us ahead of time for the battle. I can look back and see how God prepared me and listened to me in the heat of the battle. It was part of His plan for us. God heard me!  His timing may not have been  my time, but He was faithful. I know He is hearing my prayers now; He’s proved it to me.  He is hearing you, as well!  Rest in that.

In Christ,

Donna

Let’s Pray:

God thank You for hearing our prayers and for preparing us for the battles You allow to happen in our lives. Help us to hear You, as well . May we stay as ever faithful to You, as You are to us. In Jesus’ name we pray-Amen

Your Assignment:

Let us know the battles you are facing in your marriages and let’s us be privileged to pray for you as we all face the battlefield.

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Our next Women’s Online Bible Study

“Crazy Love” by Francis Chan

Begins January 6, 2013.

To sign up for this Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to learning about this “Crazy Love” with you!!

We would LOVE to have your feedback on this study! Will you take a few minutes to complete the following survey? Your responses will help us create the best online bible study experience for you! CLICK THIS LINK to fill out the short 10 question form. Your responses are completely anonymous, I promise!! Thank you so much!

Please email Christi@girlfriendscoffeehour.com if you have any questions, or if you have a private comment that you would like to forward to one of our bloggers in regards to their post that day.

Winning Him Without Words: Motivated By Agape Love – Crossing a Threshold

Motivated By Agape Love

I want to piggyback on the last paragraph of Sarah’s section from yesterday. It flows right into my section today. Let’s read it again:

John kept his eyes on Jesus. He knew it wasn’t about him but about the mighty God he served. And that’s where we find inspiration. John’s story wasn’t about him; it was about Jesus. Just as our story isn’t about us; it’s about preparing the way for Jesus in the life of our husband (pg. 152, emphasis mine).

Jesus calls us to live out agape love toward our spouse. Agape love is a selfless, sacrificial, unconditional form of love. Agape is the love that Christ has for each one of us. Agape love is based upon a decision, not a feeling. When you live out agape love, you choose to love, despite the fact that you have been hurt. You choose to overlook the ways your spouse has slighted you. You choose to forgive your spouse for the way he has hurt you.

You choose to do all of this because Christ has done this for you. You choose to do this to honor God. You choose to love your spouse without expectation. You choose to love despite the cost.

Jesus loves every single one of us this way. Even Peter, who denied Jesus three times, was able to redeem himself in John 21:15-17 by choosing Jesus three times. If you really stop and think about that, it is pretty incredible. We will make mistakes, sometimes big ones, but Jesus still has agape love for us. We can honor Him by choosing to live out agape love toward the one we have pledged to spend our lives with.

But, you make the choice to love this way. Once you do, Jesus supplies the ability. Because we absolutely cannot do this of our own will. It is impossible. We are only able to love this way because of Christ working in us. The question is: Can you sacrifice your own needs, wants, and desires and truly love your husband with an agape form of love that is not based on anything other than choosing to love him like Christ loves you?

Crossing a Threshold

What are you willing to risk for your unbelieving husband to know Jesus? (pg. 156)

Have you ever prayed the most dangerous prayer? I have. But, I’ll admit the truth to you all since I have from the beginning of this study. I wanted this prayer answered in my way. I was not prepared for anything bad or negative to happen. I was not prepared to risk anything for my husband to know Jesus. I prayed the prayer believing that the Lord would put some things in my husband’s life and then his eyes would be opened. Ta-da! Magic. My hubby would fall to his feet and praise Jesus.

But, to really pray this prayer and sincerely mean it, we have to be loving our husbands with agape love.

The path of the spiritually mismatched is not an easy one. We must be willing to give up the life we have known and live the life that Christ wants us to live. This means sacrificing everything. Everything.

When we can finally do that, we allow God into those places that we have unintentionally closed off from Him. Those places that hurt and ache. He can fill those places and show us how to love the way He loves. Even if we have been hurt. Even if we have unforgiveness in our hearts. God cannot work in those places if we cannot open ourselves up and let Him in to change us.

Are you ready to cross that threshold?

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Let’s Pray: Father, please reveal any areas of my life that I have unintentionally closed off from you. Help me to confront these issues today, Lord, and to release each one of them to you. I choose today to let you in to those dark, hurtful places. Please give me peace and a supernatural strength as I hand over each one of these issues to you and trust completely in your unfailing love and grace. Teach me how to begin loving my husband with an agape love, the way that you love us, Lord. In Jesus precious and holy name I pray, Amen!

Your Assignment: Pray and ask the Lord to show you what areas of your life you are holding back from him; what is holding you back from loving your husband with an agape love. Release these things to Jesus. Let Him in to those places that you have closed off; the places where you hurt and ache; the places where you hold onto unmet expectations. Let today mark a turning point in your relationship with the Lord and with your husband. Leave a comment below and let me know what you think of these sections in our book. What insights did you glean? What did you learn?

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Our next Women’s Online Bible Study “Crazy Love” by Francis Chan, begins January 6, 2013. To sign up for this Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to learning about this “Crazy Love” with you!!  

We would LOVE to have your feedback on this study! Will you take a few minutes to complete the following survey? Your responses will help us create the best online bible study experience for you! CLICK THIS LINK to fill out the short 10 question form. Your responses are completely anonymous, I promise!! Thank you so much!

Winning Him Without Words: Learn When to Pray The Most Dangerous Prayer – John the Baptist

John The Baptist

You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you.

ISAIAH 26:3

Lately I’ve caught myself saying “How GREAT is our God!” a lot. It seems like every time I open a book or read something on Facebook, God has left a personal message just for me to read. Last week my co-leader, Jennifer asked me if I could write today’s post because our sweet Beverly couldn’t. So of course I said I could write it. But then once I read it, I knew the real reason I was asked. It was because God had to reinforce a lesson in me. Yes, I would’ve read this section anyway and probably gathered some great information, but when I have to write about God’s word, I am forced (in a good way!) to slow down, take apart what I’ve just read and really understand it.

Today Dineen talks about John The Baptist and wonders if he ever felt left out, dissed, short changed. Did he feel like he should be part of the Twelve men chosen to walk with Jesus? He certainly had a right to feel that way. If he chose to Compare himself to the other Twelve, he was just as able to follow and spread Christ’s word, but he didn’t. He never questioned or bemoaned his role in life. He was satisfied to do what was predestined for him and he did it with honor and grace.

Sadly, I cannot say the same for myself. I have compared myself to others my entire life. In junior high a list went around our school where you rated the girls in our class based on looks and popularity. I was rated #2. Not too shabby, but to my 12 year old brain, it was devastating. All I could do was think of myself as #2. From that point on, it was my number on all my sports jerseys. I owned the number 2. It was my mind set.  I will always be second best to anyone that stands beside me.

As an adult, I still compare myself to others. And recently I’ve amped up my comparing.  Am I as creative as that mom? No. Am I as wealthy as that person? Certainly not. Will I ever be? No, because I have to be the #2. But I learned something in this chapter about being #2, or what I perceive as #2…it’s my role in life and it’s a GOOD role. I don’t have to be the prettiest wife on the block or the Martha Stewart mom or even the Beth Moore or Joyce Meyer of women’s ministry! I can be ME. Sarah Jane Boyer. And that is a great thing to be because He created ME and He has me on the path He predestined for me. First, He gave me the ability to work with words. Then later on down the path, He urged me to start writing about His words. For the first time in my life I am doing something I really enjoy and know that it is my gift from God, which makes it all the more sweeter. And ya know what? I’m not going to think of myself as #2 anymore. I know I am first and foremost with God because I have begun to make Him first and foremost with me. I don’t need to compare myself to others because there is no comparison. We are all #1 to God and all for different reasons.

What a freeing thing this is to not have to feel like I need to mold myself into something I’m not just to fit into one group/category or another. As long as I am pleasing God, I am in the right group/category. Like John The Baptist, I am content to fulfill the role God has chosen for me and I will do it with grace and honor to Him.

So how GREAT is our God, huh? He took this lesson and brought it to me to write on so that I would slow down, listen to Him and KNOW that I am right where I am suppose to be and there is no need to compare myself with others like I have been doing.  Thank you, God for the reinforcement!

Lets Pray:

Dear Lord, You knew I was struggling with comparison issues again and You brought this message right to me so that I would really sit up and listen. I pray that what I wrote will resonate with other ladies who read this post. Comparing ourselves with others is so harmful to our self esteem. Please show each and every one of our readers how important they are to You. Speak to them like You did to me and show them their special gifts that set them apart and make them #1 in Your eyes…the ONLY eyes that matter.  In your son’s precious name, Amen.

Your Assignment:

Today, please share with us what your special gift from God is. Let’s praise God for the gifts He has put in us to share with the world!

Godspeed,

Sarah

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Our next Women’s Online Bible Study “Crazy Love” by Francis Chan, begins January 6, 2013. To sign up for this Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to learning about this “Crazy Love” with you!!  

We would LOVE to have your feedback on this study! Will you take a few minutes to complete the following survey? Your responses will help us create the best online bible study experience for you! CLICK THIS LINK to fill out the short 10 question form. Your responses are completely anonymous, I promise!! Thank you so much!