November 5, 2024

A Daughter’s Worth: Week 7 Day 1 – Families Sometimes Struggle

November 12, 2012 by

Ummm…girls can we be real with each other, like really real with each other-especially in this chapter of our book.  Nobody comes from a perfect family.  As much as the idea of living in a huge home with a white picket fence around it appeals to each and every one of us; truth-be told if you took down the walls of that house: inside it wouldn’t be all roses and gumdrops!  NO WAY and can you imagine if it was, you would never have a need for God now that would make for one sad and lonely household.

One thing I have learned from trials in my own family is that when they come (and trust me they will) they make me realize that I need God on a moment by moment basis.  If we went through life without pain how would we know joy?  If we went through like without feeling hopeless how would we know the amazing feeling of hope that comes from God alone?  Family trials are not intended to destroy us or break our families apart; they can be used to grow closer to God and for us to come to terms with the fact that we always need Him.  The Lord is here for us, he desires to help us.  Do you believe that today?

Hebrews 4:16:

So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God.

There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most.

Do you understand this verse?  Sometimes I think back to my teen years and remember not fully understanding most of what I heard in church.  Let’s break apart this verse and try to figure out why it is so important to seek GOD alone in our struggles with family.

Let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God.  How do we come boldly to God?  We do this when we pray.  We think of the requests we have.  I know when I was your age I prayed a lot that my sister and I would get along.  I prayed that my brother would not be mean to me.  I prayed that my parents would not argue as much.  These prayers did not seem like a big deal.  I did not expect anything to come from these requests.  When we pray to God, when we seek Him for help, we must be bold.  We must not be afraid to share with God exactly what is on our minds or hearts.  After all, God already knows what you are thinking so do not be afraid for one minute to approach God with your requests.  This is not just anybody we are approaching here-it is God and more than that it is our GRACIOUS God.  The one who gives generously and the one who loves to hear from us.  When you have a trial in your family first bring your requests boldly and with confidence to our gracious God who loves you so much!

There we will receive his mercy.  Mercy is compassion or forgiveness.  When we turn to God with confidence we are turning to our Friend.  As our Friend, God has compassion on us and He forgives us for all of the times that we mess up big time.  If we so freely receive HIS forgiveness for the times we mess up big time (lying, not being kind, raising our voice, disobeying our parents, etc.) shouldn’t we do the same for our family members and everyone else for that matter when they hurt us?  The answer is yes just so you know.  Trust me, I know this is not an easy task.  When we are in the middle of that long drawn out voice raising battle with our parents the last thing we want to do is forgive them for the hurtful words said.  Do not be discouraged if this seems impossible.  When we come to God and share with Him our hurt, it is God who then helps us to show mercy to that same person who hurt us.  We know how amazing God’s forgiveness is, and we should desire for others to experience His forgiveness too.  When we choose to forgive them, they are able to experience a sliver of His forgiveness!

We will find grace to help us when we need it most.  Grace and mercy go hand in hand.  God’s grace though is one of the absolute coolest things.  I do not know if you know this or not but when we mess up and God loves us still-that is His grace at his finest.  How many times have you gotten into a fight with your parents?  When you are in the fight the last thing you are thinking is you love each other.  BUT after hours or days you realize you really do still love one another.  Well, kind of the same thing with God: except God loves us no matter what, it does not take him hours or days to come around, he loves us in the moment, no matter what that moment may be.  Because God loves us that much and because He is in that moment with us, we have access to His help instantly.  You are not alone.  God is waiting patiently for you to seek Him for help.  He will always help you.  This is a promise from God.

As I said earlier, trials in our families will come that is certain!  It is up to us to let God in to help us through each trial.  I encourage you to share this post with your family today.  I encourage you to make a pact to one another that when the messes in life happen, that you will vow to live out this verse by seeking God first for help to have mercy and grace for one another.  God blessed you with each one of your family members to do life with.  Let us thank Him for their purpose in your life and make the most of the days you have to spend together!

Let’s Pray:  Lord, I thank you so much for family.  I thank you for giving us whoever we have in our families to love and be there for each other.  I thank you that we can turn to you when we need you and you will always be there for us!  I am so glad that you hear us when we pray to you.  Let us remember to seek you for help and remember to offer others grace even when we feel they do not deserve it because you offer us grace every day!  We love you so much!  Amen.

Love you girls!!

Diane

*****

For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information.

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Lady In Waiting: Lady of Security (Reading Assignment)

November 11, 2012 by

 

Happy Sunday ladies!  After tacking the tough topic of purity last week, I hope you are ready to look inward and see where your security comes from.  I truly pray that this study is blessing each and every one of you.  I know for me, it isn’t always easy, but it is definitely beneficial.  We are perfectly imperfect and as long as we continue to seek Him, we will grow in Him each and every day.

Here are the reading assignments for the week:

November 12: Lady of Security Feelings of Insecurity – Jackie


November 13: Believing a Lie / Secure Love – Michelle


November 14: Manipulation and Maneuvering – Tonya


November 15: Quitting the Hunt – Katie


November 16: Motive Check – Diane

LET’S PRAY

ABBA Father, I ask for your blessing upon each and every woman in this study.  You know their hearts even better than they do.  Through this study, through this book, and especially through your Word speak to them.  Give them what they need to hear and give them the clarity to recognize it even when it isn’t easy.

In Him,

Michelle

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For the “Lady in Waiting” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

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Lady In Waiting: What If It’s Too Late?

November 9, 2012 by

I am not going to lie to you ladies; this will be the hardest thing I probably ever have to write about.  Furthermore, when I saw that I had this part of the chapter to write about I instantly felt sick to my stomach.  Then I prayed, and I know that God gave me this topic for a very special reason.  This is His way of telling me, you are ready to share such an ugly part of your life with others because of the beauty you have let Me make of it.  It is my prayer that as you read this you can get past the ugly my life once was and focus on the beautiful things that God has made from my messes in life.

I can tell you this topic alone has brought so many tears to my eyes; probably enough to make an ocean-no joke.  The past week I have been thinking to myself this part of the chapter is so personal, how can I possibly begin to share what God wants me to share with these women when I don’t want to even share it with myself?  Then I am reminded of Revelation 12:11 They overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony.  There is power in our testimony ladies.  There is hope from our hopeless situations, purity can come from our impurity, and the only reasoning for these miracles is because of the victory we have over Satan and the only reason for THAT is BECAUSE of the beautiful sacrifice of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.  And that my friends, is how I can share what God so desperately wants you to hear today.

When I read the words on page 89, my heart sank.  “If you are reading this after the fact and are dealing with the guilt of the lost gift, do not be discouraged”.  The first time I read that it was about two years ago and I was very uncertain of how to not be discouraged.  Second time around, and two years later when I read that sentence I was overwhelmed with thankfulness to God that I am no longer dealing with the guilt of the lost gift.  What changed in two years you might be wondering?  Honestly, I changed.  Not because of anything I did, it was all because of what God did for me, on a cross.  He died and shed HIS innocent blood and took my guilt and shame away with Him.  Ladies, GOD DID THE SAME THING FOR YOU!  In those two years, I accepted personally what HIS gift meant for me; the new life I have freely been given!  My past did not change, but I chose to change the way I was living.  I chose to start embracing God and when I did I was no longer discouraged.  Have you done the same?

If you are reading this after the fact, please listen closely.  I understand the guilt, I understand waking up and feeling covered in shame.  I understand the pain behind every single tear that falls from your eyes.  I understand the pain of a broken heart.  My heart was broken … correction, shattered when someone who I loved took my innocence from me without asking my permission.  My natural response to this was not “this is all his fault for doing this to me”, instead it was “this is all my fault for letting this happen”.  I suffered with extreme guilt and it led me to turn completely away from God.  It was too late for me; I could no longer be a virgin when I got married like I had always dreamed of so I gave up.  I believed and lived out this lie for two years, living in sin.

One day the Lord placed A More Beautiful You by Johnny Diaz into my life.  I was driving along; crying because of what I had just done, that I knew was so wrong, but I just did not know how to stop going back to that sin.  Out of nowhere, seriously nowhere, my preprogrammed country station became a Christian radio station, K-love in my car.  This is what I heard:

So turn around you’re not too far
To back away be who you are
To change your path go another way
It’s not too late, you can be saved
If you feel depressed with past regrets
The shameful nights hope to forget
Can disappear, they can all be washed away

By the one who’s strong, can right your wrongs
Can rid your fears dry, all your tears
And change the way you look at this big world
He will take your dark distorted view
And with His light, He will show you truth
And again you’ll see through the eyes of a little girl

My heart ached to hear those lyrics over and over again, but my tears got in the way.  I searched for that song for hours after hearing it and could not find it anywhere on the Internet.  Those lyrics God used to start to mend my broken heart.  But that was just the beginning of the mending.

I could not get over the fact that even though I did not choose to lose my virginity, I CHOSE TO KEEP GIVING MYSELF AWAY TO A MAN AND THEN MEN WHO WERE NOT CONCERNED WITH MY HEART, JUST MY BODY.  I fed into the lie that I needed this sin to be a part of my life.  I fed into the lie that I was indeed damaged goods.  These lies were so hard to get rid of.  What lies do you believe about your past?  What is tangling you up inside, making it seem impossible to get past the sins of your past?

PLEASE TAKE A MINUTE TO LET THIS TRUTH RUN THROUGH YOUR SOUL: No matter what your past may look like, all God sees is beauty.  Truly, if you are a child of God, if you have asked for his forgiveness for your mistakes, then you are living a beautiful new life!  God does not see the shame or guilt that weighs so heavy on your heart-He just sees your heart for what he created it to be.  His love is never out of reach no matter how far you have gotten yourself from accepting it.  God has the luxury of forgetting our sins, and we have the luxury of being forgiven and able to live our life filled with God’s love. 

Here is one of many examples of the beautiful things got has brought out of my ugly!  My heart was almost healed.  There were still some things I had to confess to God.  I walked into therapy with my pink journal in hand.  Each page was filled with sentence after sentence of pain, hurt, shame, guilt, sin, and ugliness.  I read aloud each page.  I ripped out each page and put it in God’s hands (literally my therapist drew God’s hands on a piece of paper and sat it against the wall).  As I was done with each page I prayed aloud to God.  I wanted to see His hands so I looked up, at that very instant His hands (the paper) fell over everything I had written.  That was the sign I needed that God loved me so much and that He took all of my shame and pain and guilt with Him where it belongs and left me with a brand new heart!  I am pure, I am a virgin, and I am not damaged, thank you Jesus!

Let’s Pray:  Dear Heavenly Father, thank you for your love.  Thank you for forgiving us and transforming our ugly past into such a beautiful life with you!  I pray that every single person reading this takes away the thing that you had planned for them to hear!  I praise you for the opportunity I have been given to share my heart with others.  I pray your many blessings upon each woman who has felt, it was too late for her.  I cannot put in words how thankful I am for healing our broken hearts!  We love you so incredibly much!  Amen.

Your Assignment:  If you are holding anything in from you past, get rid of it.  Please write it down and put it in God’s hands.  Let’s replace that space with God’s love!  Let’s be each other’s support system when temptations come or when we are starting to go backwards.  Please post below what God tells you when you are feeling bad for you past, I believe these words have the power to encourage and help each and every one of us!

Love you all so much!

Diane

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For the “Lady In Waiting” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

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A Daughter’s Worth: Week 6 / Day 1: A Good Friend is Hard to Find

November 5, 2012 by

 

There was a time when I thought I had the best friends a girl could ask for. We vowed to each other that we would be friends forever no matter what happened. At the time, I could not imagine my life without those girls. We loved each other so incredibly much. I truly believed that we really would all be friends forever. Then came the day when they stopped talking to me. This was so devastating and frustrating. I remember crying myself to sleep many nights. I just could not put together why they were doing this to me.

So, I dried my tears and turned to God. Because of how much I valued my relationships with those girls, I had completely forgotten that God had already chosen me to be His friend. “You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit—fruit that will last. Then the Father will give you whatever you ask for in my name.” John 15:16 God had taken all of those best friends out of my life just in time, before I was negatively influenced. You see those friendships were not with Christians who were encouraging my walk with the Lord or joining me in bearing fruit. If I would have continued to be friends with them, the fruit produced by those relationships would be deadly to me and others. God saved me from the dangers of close friendships with non-Christians.

Think about your friendships, what kinds of fruit are they producing? There is a difference between being friendly to non-Christians and being friends with non-Christians. We are called to love others, we are just not supposed to get caught up in relationships with others that are not encouraging us in our most important relationship in our life, the one we have with God.

When I turned to God years ago, in the midst of my tears, God so gently spoke to me and this is what I heard: I love you and call you to love others. You have a friend in me, I will never leave you, I am here for you, you can trust me, and I will never hurt you. I am by your side always. I am your best friend forever.

I never considered God a friend up until that day. There is no doubt that God is our best friend. “A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” Proverbs 18:24 Let it be out heart’s desire to find that friend and in return be that friend. Thankfully, we have Christ as a perfect example of how to be that friend described in Proverbs, simply because Jesus is that friend to each and every one of us. If you are struggling with finding a lasting friendship, ask Jesus to bring one into your life. As your best friend, I guarantee that He will; after all He has enough of them to introduce you to!

I never thought I would have good friendships with godly women. God cares enough about you and me to give us the desires of our hearts. He knew I needed Christian friends so he provided me with some of the absolute best! These women are answers to prayer and I am so thankful for them. Together, we take on this world with God’s hands in ours. We serve others, we love others, we fellowship, and we do it all together, with our best friend forever, God!

LET’S PRAY: Dear Jesus, thank you for being our best friend. Thank you that we can always turn to you for anything and you will be there, patiently waiting to hear from us. I pray for the girls that need Christian friendships in their lives. I ask that you bring godly friendships into their lives. I pray that we all grow in our friendships together in our discussion groups. Thank you for these gifts from above: Godly friendships. We love you so much! Amen

You’ve Got a Friend in ME,

Love Diane
_____________________________________
For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information

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Lady in Waiting: Lady of Purity / Deadly Deception

November 5, 2012 by

 

Girls, I want to be honest with you from the start, this chapter was a struggle for me.  As I read through it, a lot of feelings of shame and embarrassment came up for me.  Feelings I honestly didn’t even know I had.  Then followed the thoughts of, “How am I ever going to talk to these women about purity, when as a single, never married mom, it is obvious I am not “pure”.”  I can say this much to you all.  I have been saved for 3 ½ years, and I have made the commitment to remain pure until the Lord sees fit to show me the man He has planned for me.  I have not had a perfect past, but I ask for your grace as we travel through this topic of purity together.

We live in such a sexually charged society don’t we?  Sexual promiscuity seems more the norm than the exception to the rule.  Yet as Jesus girls, we are held to a higher standard, we have a higher calling.  God wants better for us.  The temptations to compromise physically are all around us, but we are called to be ladies of purity.

This is not a situation unique to 2012.  If you look back to the time of Ruth, her story took place in the time of the judges – a time of disobedience, idolatry and violence.  These were dark days for Israel, when “everyone did as he saw fit.”  Sound familiar?  So to think that Ruth had it any easier than we do in modern society would be fooling ourselves.  So how do we, like Ruth, safeguard our special treasure and stay women of purity?  We will spend the next week trying to figure it all out together.

The deadliest deception we face in today’s society is that we should seek its ultimate pleasures because that will give us the least pain.  More often than not, the exact opposite is true.  As far as guidance on the topic of sex before marriage, look no farther than our Heavenly Father.  God intends for us to enjoy the pleasure of sex within marriage only.  The joy of such an intimate act between two people is maximized when both of you remain pure.  We, especially as women, can get caught up in the fantasy of it, the romance of it, but there is always the truth, His truth: Sex is special!  Not sensuous sex, but satisfying sex in your Creator’s will and time.

We are worth more my dear women of faith.  We are worth more than a temporary pleasure that is likely to lead to the sting of regret.  We are worth more than having a man try to lure you into something you don’t want, by using manipulation.  We are worth the joy and pleasure and love that our Heavenly Father has waiting for us.  Believe it, believe Him.

LET’S PRAY

Father, it is so easy for us to be lured by the traps of today’s society and the pleasure seeking, selfish ways of this world.  But we know you have so much more for us.  We are a precious gift, not to be given away freely.  Help to give us strength when we feel weak.  Show each and every woman reading this her worth.  We are special, and in Your strength we prepare to give ourselves only to the man you have chosen specifically for us in your will and in your time.  We ask this in Your Holy Name.  Amen.

YOUR ASSIGNMENT

Is staying pure a difficult aspect to your single life?  Is it something that is easy for you to cope with?  In either situation, why do you think that is?  What strategies do you have, or can you come up with, to help stay pure in today’s world?

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For the “Lady in Waiting” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

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Lady in Waiting: An Advantageous Position

November 2, 2012 by

This chapter makes me think of my sister so incredibly much!  Reading through the story of the married lady you may think-no way does married life really get that crazy.  Now, I am not married, but my sister is, and I can assure you that the story in the book is not even close to as crazy as it really gets being married and having children running around.  Trust me, I have experienced the crazy right alongside of my sister and honestly if it wasn’t for the grace of God-there would be no way she could get through her day without putting her children and husband up for adoption.

My sister and I are very close and very similar.  We both strive to live our lives for God alone.  We both cry at the same things, and laugh at the same things-mainly each other.  We share similar passions.  We encourage one another and are both thankful we are sisters and have each other to go through life with.  There is one thing about us that makes us very different as we live out the lives God has planned perfectly for each one of us- she is married with three ADORABLE children (I know I am biased but they truly are the most adorable kids in the universe) and I am single living in a perfect little apartment all for me.

There are so many times that my sister and I will be talking on the phone (me usually whining on the phone) in the midst of living out the difference in our lives and she will mutter the words, enjoy being single while it lasts because when you are married you won’t have time to yourself.  This is usually said after I go on and on about the fact that I am single and alone and wondering how I am ever going to find the man God has for me if I am sitting home, alone talking to her.  Meanwhile, my sister on the other end is wishing and praying for some sort of miraculous thing where time freezes just for her kids and husband and she can move around doing what she wants and needs without them just for even a minute will do.

I am always reminded of a few things when I talk to my sister in these moments:  living out married life with kids is a lot different than the married life with kids we dream of when we are single.  By enjoying single life she doesn’t want me to enjoy the fact that I feel like a loser sometimes, she wants me to enjoy the time I have with God alone and make the most of that time.  Married women want what single women have-not so much singleness, but aloneness: time to spend alone with God or with a good movie without any interruptions of motherhood and being a wife.  In the same way single women want what married women have: a husband to come home, give us a kiss, ask us how our day was, and to spend our evenings with him and not alone.

The fact of that matter though is that GOD IS CALLING ME AND YOU TO SINGLENESS FOR THIS SEASON OF OUR LIVES.  WE MUST NOT WANT SOMETHING WE DO NOT HAVE.  WE MUST EMBRACE THIS TIME IN OUR LIFE, WE MUST USE OUR TIME THAT WE HAVE ALL TO OURSELVES AND SHARE IT WITH GOD, YEARNING TO HEAR FROM HIM AND GROW CLOSER TO HIM.

My sister will be the first person to tell you that marriage and motherhood is such a blessing and gift from above.  You NEVER want to trade those blessings and gifts for anything.  She will also be the first to tell you that being a wife and mommy makes spending time with God a little more of a challenge.

As a single woman, I am telling you that the only thing that keeps us from taking advantage of the TIME we have to spend with God daily (distractionless) is the whining we do in our minds, the unrealistic dreams we will not let go of.  There will come a day when most of us will not have the luxury of one-on-one time with God without a husband needing socks, a poopy diaper needing changed, and the Bible you are so desperately trying to read being chewed on by a teething little child.  So let us make the most of the time we do have to put all of our attention and focus on the one and only satisfaction to our hearts desires.  You are where you are for a reason, married or single-God still desires to spend time with you.  And as a single woman of God it is our hearts desire to be concerned with living our lives for HIM ALONE.

LET’S PRAY:  Dear Heavenly Father, I thank you and praise you so much for the time you give us every day to spend with YOU!  I pray that in the midst of our singleness we do not become distant from you, but instead we use this time to grow closer to you.  Prepare our hearts for whatever lies ahead for us.  Help us to take full advantage of our single days-with you.  I love you so much Jesus!  We pray all of these things in your HOLY name, AMEN.

YOUR ASSIGNMENT:  List everything you want in your life.  Give that list to God, literally take that list and pray to God about everything on it.  Then put the paper in a safe place.  Ask God to turn that list of your wants into HIS LIST OF HIS WANTS.  As time goes by, compare the lists.  See what has changed and what you have been living out for Him all along!

Love you ladies!!

Diane

_________________

For the “Lady In Waiting” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

 

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A Daughter’s Worth Week 5 / Day 1: God Helps You Deal With Disappointments

October 29, 2012 by

 

I had to think back to my teenage years for this blog. For most things from my teenage years, it is difficult to remember the details of excitement surrounding certain events.  Prom, I know it was great, I remember the dress I wore, but who all went with us, what car did we take, where was the prom, where did we go afterwards??  I am just not sure of these specific details.  School, I remember the good times, I remember the papers I wrote, the classes I hated, all of the information I learned though I am not too sure about.  In fact I think I told myself to forget if ice cubes are a solid or a liquid…it worked because I still am not too sure.  But certain things I can try to forget but I never will be able to.  The disappointments that I went through in my teenage years, I remember them all.  I can tell you very specific details of just about every disappointment I faced as a teenager.  I am sure you can think of several disappointments you have gone through or are going through right now.

When disappointments come into our lives they cause so much pain and hurt.  But, when you are finally able to look back on them you can be thankful for those disappointments and where they brought you-closer to God.

How many of you desire to be close to God?  How many of you desire to hear from God?  How many of you desire to feel love from God every moment of every day?  I know when I was your age, I desired those things.  I would hear older, wiser women talking about their time with God and what He spoke to them, and I always wondered how to get that with God.  Yes I want to hear from God, but he is not talking to me.  I believed that because I was younger than the women who I heard these tales from God was unable to communicate with me and be close to me.  What a lie-if we open our hearts to God no matter what age we are God will make Himself known to us, we will feel His presence.

If I really think about why these women were able to hear from God and I was not I believe I know the answer.  It was how I was handling my disappointments when I was younger.  I was trying to fix all of my problems on my own.  I was not asking God for help through the pain, I was hiding it all inside.  There were even times I was disappointed in God because of the trials I was constantly going through.  By taking God out of the equation for fixing disappointment I was pulling myself further away from God.  I was making it impossible to hear from Him.  I was avoiding hearing from Him simply because I thought I could not.  I did not know God was capable of helping me.

Do you believe God is able to help you?  Romans 8:26 insures He does!

In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. 

One thing we can be certain of is that disappointments will come our way.  There is no way to avoid disappointments in this world.  But, take heart because God has OVERCOME THE WORLD.  When disappointments do come into your life, ask God for help.  Tell Him your desires to grow closer to Him and to feel His presence more through this disappointment.  Use this disappointment to hear from God.  Instead of turning away from God, run into Him will all of your strength, help, and love.

When I look back on each disappointment I do not feel pain, I see God working to make my life just how he intends it to be.  I see the Lord’s love in each one of the trials I have been through.  I get to experience HIS comfort.  I am thankful that what was intended to cause me pain, God used to bring me closer to HIS comforting arms.  Just a little fun fact for you: an ice cube (not melted) is a solid.

Let’s Pray:  Lord, I thank you so much for each one of these girls in this study.  I ask that you make yourself known to them.  I pray that they are able to see YOU and feel YOUR comfort, and know YOUR help in the midst of disappointments.  I ask that you use these painful times in our lives to draw us closer to you.  Thank you for praying for us when we are just not able to.  We love you so much and we thank you for each disappointment we face, because we trust you are there through them with us, each step of the way.  AMEN.

Much Love,

Diane

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For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information

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Lady In Waiting: Finding the Priceless Pearls

October 26, 2012 by

 

When I looked at the schedule and saw I had this section of the chapter to talk about with you ladies, I was ecstatic!  I am pretty sure this is my favorite chapter.  When I read, A Lady in Waiting years ago, I wrote down this sentence from page 61: From the time you wake in the morning until you go to bed at night, set your heart’s desire on exalting Him.  This paper is sitting in my nightstand drawer.  Every time I read that sentence I pray that I am able to do just what is says that day.  Through the years I have learned what exactly it means to exalt God.

I have not always exalted God.  In fact for three years of my life, my heart’s desire was not for God; it was for a man who I tried to make my God.  I lived to honor this man, I lived for this man, from the time I woke up in the morning until I went to sleep at night I made this man a huge idol in my life.  This was the absolute worst time in my life.  He was very abusive, controlling, manipulative, and to put it simply, his heart’s desire was to destroy me and to sit back and watch in slow motion as he painfully ripped every single one of the pearls away I had received from God the day I accepted Him into my heart.  The worst part was I could not defend these pearls he was taking so viciously from me, because I had no idea they existed.

When all I was left with was an empty strand where beautiful pearls once laid, it was my turn to add new pearls.  Instead of adding God honoring pearls to that strand, it slowly started getting corrupted with ugly pearls of drunkenness, provocativeness, impurity, idolatry, outbursts of anger, carousing, anxieties, depression, and honestly I could probably go on and on.  I did not know what God honoring qualities and character looked like for me.  I saw it in other people, my sister and grandmother especially.  They wore their pearl necklaces proud as they should, and I was happy for them and others who did just that, but I had lost all hope for myself.  I truly believed it was too late for me.  I never thought the day would come where I would wear the pearls God has been preparing for me.

I can very thankfully and happily say that today, and every day, I stand confident in the pearls that God has picked out just for me.  I found them all, some I had to work so hard for, others he so graciously gave to me.  One pearl on the strand I think I am most thankful for is, LOVE.  There are no words this side of Heaven to describe to you the benefits and satisfaction in God’s love.  This is one pearl I never have to work for.  God’s love is there for me, even when my strand was covered with sin, His love was still there, on the other side of the clasp, but still, IT WAS THERE!  One pearl I still struggle with is self-control.  When I read this book, years ago, I wrote in the margin, WORK ON SELF CONTROL.  For whatever reason I ignored that note since it was written years ago.

This is what I learned when I saw that note staring in my face the beginning of the week.  We all have access to the God honoring qualities and likeness he teaches us about in the Bible.  Yes, they are beautiful pearls.  But, for whatever reason, we sell ourselves short.  We believe the lie that we are not good enough for God’s best.  We know of the qualities and pearls we can have in Christ, but we choose or settle for the qualities or pearls we have grown accustomed to in this world.  We go for the dime store pearl necklace when waiting for us is the priceless one in Heaven.

Exalting God is when we put aside the dime store necklace we have felt comfortable with and set our eyes and hearts above to the ONE and only who will give us the pearls HE desires for us.  Exalting God is when we let the Holy Spirit fill us with the pearls we are so deserving of from up above.  Exalting God is when we praise Him and honor Him with the pearls he has provided us with to treasure on our “necklace of virtue”.

Let’s Pray:

Father God, I thank you and praise you so much for the priceless pearls that you have for each and every one of us.  I pray that as we continue this study we strive to exalt you every moment of every day.  I pray that each and every one of us on this journey is able trade in the dime store necklace for a necklace of virtue so graciously given to us by Your Spirit.  Thank you for going along this journey with us.  I pray our heart’s desire YOU alone.  I pray all of these things in your precious name, Amen.

Your Assignment:

What is your heart’s desire?  Spend some time today being honest with God about what pearls you have on your necklace.  Tell Him what ones you want to remove, tell Him what ones you need help getting to their full potential.  Think about what exalting God means, and desire to spend your days doing JUST THAT.

Love you ladies all a super bunch!!

Diane

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For the “Lady In Waiting” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

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Have you accepted Christ into your heart?  Is His Spirit living inside of you?  If you have not, but would like to pray, please contact our prayer team at prayer@girlfriendscoffeehour.com .  Someone from our prayer team is waiting to pray with you! 

Filed Under: Singles Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Lady In Waiting: Ministry of Service, Writing, and Hospitality

October 11, 2012 by

This blog is brought to you

by Katie Blumberg

 

For me, the excuses began in college. I wanted to meet the perfect man, and in order for that to happen, I had to become the perfect woman. In my mind the perfect man for me would be studying to become a pastor or a youth pastor, therefore I would need to become the perfect pastor’s wife. How does one attain this high and regal status? By becoming a Biblical Studies major of course! Now don’t get me wrong, I loved studying the Word and diving through Scripture, pursuing the Lord, and learning about how to do ministry well in my every day life. I do not regret what I studied in school because it has made me the woman I am today; however, my initial intentions were not the holiest! I thought that as I waited for my future man, I would have to give up on becoming anything but a future wife of someone.

Continuing on to graduate school… Studying something that may lead to a job, rather than just a marital status… Pursuing a long-term mission’s trip to another country… Traveling to the other side of the country for a summer to work in a ministry position… Taking a fellowship in another state where I could pursue my dreams of owning a coffee shop, and be connected with other Christians who are figuring out life post-college… Joining Youth With a Mission and traveling the world spreading the good news… Moving in with my aunt in Georgia and doing ministry in her church… The list goes on and on. These are all service opportunities, dreams, and passions that I gave up as I waited for my future husband. “I’ll do that when I get married,” or “What if doing that leads me away from the man that I am supposed to be with, and I miss my opportunity with him?” were always thoughts that held me back from accepting my singleness and running towards my dreams. So here I sit, snuggling my cat in a city I feel safe in, surrounded by people I feel safe with, at a job that is safe. I only fear now that I will get married, eventually, and wonder what could have been if I had pursued the desires of my heart when I was single.

Ladies, you have all been blessed with gifts, desires, and passions. Some you may be figuring out, others you have known your entire life. Use them! Don’t wait around for your husband to arrive thinking that you will be able to pursue those things then! He is not going to make you any more able to be you than you can be RIGHT now! Have you been blessed with a servants’ heart? Find out the needs of those in your neighborhood (ministry is not confined to a four-walled building we call the church!) and help them!

Has the Lord given you the gift of encouragement? Write a letter, and email, send a text, or meet a friend for coffee and tell them how much they have blessed you. Is opening your home to friends and family exciting to you? Break out your best dishes, cook up a delicious meal and invite over everyone you know! Please don’t stuff those gifts inside thinking you’ll pull them out on a rainy day or that your husband will help you to become the woman you were meant to be.

Use this time to build relationships with amazing, godly women who will encourage and lift you up, surround you with love, keep you accountable, and push you to use those gifts for the Lord.

“It is doubtful that there could ever be a better time to serve Jesus than this “moment” of singleness. Rather than wasting precious moments fantasizing about an earthly lover, take advantage of your free hours each day to serve the Lord of Heaven. If you are frustrated and distracted, rather than fruitfully serving Jesus, then ask Him right now to adjust your vision.” (pg 33).

Take this time to let the Lord teach you who you are, what you love, and how you will be used to advance his Kingdom. Your husband is not going to tell you those things, and guess what?! I bet that amazing man will be even more attracted to you if you have spent time figuring these things out, building a strong foundation in Christ, and serving the Lord and your neighbor even without him by your side! Take the risk you have been putting off for fear of losing your chance with ‘him.’ Figure out your love language, and start loving on everyone who comes across your path!

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 Let’s Pray:

 Abba, Pappa; thank you for your grace and mercy on us. Thank you for bestowing gifts upon us to bless you and others with. Please teach us to prayerfully and thoughtfully use these gifts in the way that you intended. Give us the courage to explore our interests; teach us who we are in YOU, so that we never lose our identity, even in marriage! Instill in us a servants heart, and a desire to seek out your plan for our lives. In the name of Jesus Christ we pray, Amen.

Your Assignment:

What have you given up for fear that you will miss out on finding the man of your dreams? Are you waiting to start something big because you think you need a husband to help you? If so, what step are you going to take to stop sitting around bored and day-dreaming about your fantasy man, and start acting on what the Lord has given you? Let’s get started ladies!

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Meet Katie Blumber – Blog Contributor Singles Ministry

Katie is a recent graduate from a small Christian liberal arts school, with a degree in Biblical Studies and Human Services. She has a huge ache for deep justice in her community and city, and longs to do God’s work in her every day life.

She is a barista at a local coffee shop, where she gets to serve amazing coffee and interact with people all day long. She volunteers at her church, loves going to shows and discovering new bands, and spends time with her amazing friends any chance that she gets.

For Katie, life is all about living out Christ’s love in the community that she lives in.  She is also passionate about purity, healthy relationships, and teaching others to see themselves the way that Christ sees them.

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Lady In Waiting: Diligence and the Ministry of Teaching, Encouragement, and Prayer

October 10, 2012 by

 

I was (and sometimes still am) an excuse maker.

“I’m too busy”

“I don’t know what to say”

“What difference will I make?’

“There are better qualified people”

Diligence in ministry is something that I was not, and honestly it is an area that God is still working on.

I did little things here and there at church. But a big lesson I learned was that it doesn’t stop at church. There were and continue to be so many opportunities in where I can be diligent in these areas; I actually saw more opportunities outside of my church than inside of it.

He calls us to do many things in his name; three of those are to teach, to encourage and to pray. My famous line was “I’m busy” or “I don’t have the time”; and yes, truth be told I am busy, but so is everyone else.

I had to stop making excuses.

Teach. Encourage. Pray.

The book asks a great question that can be applied to all three areas “Are we giving out as much as we take in?” I know that I take in a lot, whether it’s quiet study time with God, encouraging words (my love language is words of affirmation) or people praying for me.

I have to ask myself some questions. Am I teaching others, sharing the truths god has shown me? Am I encouraging others, whether it is my co-workers, or the frustrated mom in the store? Am I forming “duets” and lifting others up in prayer? Am I praying for others on my own?

Just yesterday I was in Wal-mart, a young mother was shopping with her little girl and the little girl was way beyond done with the shopping trip. The mom was frustrated which caused the little girl to express her dislike for Wal-mart even louder. I’ve been there. A smile to the mom and to the little girl, plus a reassuring word to the mother about not being alone in the world of toddler tempers tantrums and a prayer for the two; I feel that God had me go down that isle for a reason. It was an opportunity for be to give back.

I’m not always diligent in these areas. I talk myself out of opportunities (a lot); I make excuses (a lot). But He always gives me more chances (a lot). He gives us opportunities to teach, encourage
and to pray.

God doesn’t require us to be the most outgoing, the most eloquent, the most educated or resourceful women. He requires our time and our willingness and diligence.
God will provide us with the words, knowledge and tools to do the things he asks us to do.   I say that because I am not the most extroverted person out there and I was using my excuses to stay that way.

It’s funny, the more I explain to God why I can’t do these things the more opportunities He creates for them to be done. Yes, He is a God of humor. He does something else as well, He brings back the feelings I had when I had someone teach me, when I had someone lift me up and encourage me, when I knew that I was being prayed for.

I had to give back what I took in.

I have to give back what I take in.

Let’s Pray:
Lord, thank you for the teaching, encouraging and prayer that you have allowed us to receive, thank you for those who took in, and gave back out to us. Please open our eyes for such opportunities; for the chances for us to give out to others in need. Thank you for the time you have blessed us with, please let us see the time as a tool, and please let us to be sensitive to the words you give us and the urging you put on our hearts to do as you ask. Thank you for the opportunities to be diligent in teaching, in prayer and in encouragement.

Your Assignment:

Remember a time in which you were taught, encouraged or prayed for. How did it feel? Share some examples of situations in which you gave back what you took in. Reading examples of others may teach and encourage the rest of the group to step out and give back.

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If you would like to take part in this Online Bible Study, and join our Facebook Discussion Group, please click on the “Sign-Up Here” button located at the top of our website, in the Menu Bar.  Once we receive your request, we will add you to our group!

God bless,

Tonya

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