November 27, 2024

Resolution for Women- The Encourager

September 12, 2012 by

1 John 3:18

“We must not love with word or speech, but with truth and action.”

_____________________________________

The Intentional Encourager

 In our chapter, Priscilla was amazed that a very young 22-year-old Solomon – when given the opportunity to gain health, wealth, prosperity, and prestige – asked God simply for WISDOM to lead the people he was made king over.  This amazed me as well.  I have 4 children ranging in age from 17-26 and if given the opportunity to gain health, wealth, and prosperity OR wisdom – my crowd would certainly choose health, wealth, and prosperity. What child this age today wouldn’t?  Once again, like Priscilla, my initial thoughts were the same – King David certainly must have raised his child the right way ~ a way different from what I raised my own.  Do you see the similarities of this situation with times today?  They really aren’t any different.  We all have character defects or deficiencies, we all make errors in judgement and King David did as well.  Priscilla says, ‘He made some colossal mistakes in both his personal life and his parenting’; as we all have done and continue to do.

  ‘My son Solomon – God has chosen him alone – is young and inexperienced. The task is great, because this palatial structure is not for man but for the Lord God.’            Chronicles 29:1-2

Solomon has been instructed to build God’s temple – did you get that?  God’s temple!  That is HUGE! …..and although he recognizes that his son is “young and inexperienced”, he also realizes that he is the chosen one.  That God chose Solomon to be king, to lead his people, to get His temple built.  Now it is his job to support, encourage, and most of all BELIEVE and have faith in his son to accomplish this undertaking. David does just that.

Like most parents, I have high expectations for my son and daughters.  I want them to have wisdom, health, wealth, prestige and all the blessings God promises in His word.  Unfortunately there have been many choices made by my children that were not in their best interest, that go against God’s instruction – that have caused me to lose faith in them, that have caused me to stop believing in them in many areas.  Shame on me.   I certainly was not perfect growing up and only in the last 4-5 years have built a relationship with Jesus Christ that has given me the desire and conviction to make my life’s decisions based on my Heavenly Father’s desires, the desires found in His word.  God didn’t give up on me.  God believed in me.  However, it remains very hard difficult to give my children that same gift (virtually impossible! – although we know with God all things are possible!)

As God’s child,  He was with me every step of the way growing up.  I know this because I should have been a ‘street kid’.  As a teenager my brother and I were being raised by my father.  He left our house to move in with his girlfriend and we had free reign.  Our dad wasn’t there giving us parental guidance, he wasn’t cooking for us or taking care of us.  I remember living in that mobile home (our home), just me and my brother (who was only 18 months younger than me) wanting to take care of him. There was no desire to ‘party’ as many teenagers do today. There was no desire to stay out until all hours or to do drugs or drink. God delivered us from what could have been a disastrous young adulthood.  He gave us wisdom.

The lesson being taught to us today is that we MUST be INTENTIONAL (and we have heard this word throughout many chapters n our study) with our children.  We must INTENTIONALLY encourage them, we must INTENTIONALLY provide them support (and I’m not talking about financial support or treasures), we must INTENTIONALLY believe in them.  We have to trust that our Heavenly Father has them – after all, they are His children.  We are simply here to give them earthly guidance and support until such day that they are reunited with their Father in heaven.  They are on loan to us.  We must never give up providing them with the spiritual food they need to get to know their daddy.  We must believe that they are going to do GREAT things in the course of their lives, that they too will build a relationship with God that will allow them to give their children what David did to Solomon.  This is a hard task ladies – a tough, tough task.  It is for me anyway – maybe it’s easier for you guys.  Perhaps you are in a different place in your life than I am in mine.  However, the lesson remains the same.  BE INTENTIONAL with your children.  As we have read in the past chapters, our jobs as parents don’t end when our children become adults.  Even with our grown children we must be INTENTIONAL in our actions towards them and continue to ‘train them up’ in the ways of the Lord. We must believe in them, encourage them, and support them – Intentionally. What incredible life gifts for them!

Let’s Pray:

Father, work in our lives.   Work in my heart Lord and in the heart of every reader here.  Allow us to become convicted and determined to be INTENTIONAL with our children AND the children of this world – those in our churches, in our communities, in  other cities and countries we visit.  Especially those father that do not have a parental figure in their lives.   You know every situation Father – for every parent and every child.  Provide us with the wisdom, guidance, and gentle nudges OR large pushes necessary to give our children the gift of belief in them, of encouragement, and the desire to continue spiritually feeding them regardless of where they are today in their personal lives.  May we be more like David in our daily walk with our children.

Your Assignment:

List some of the immature actions and temperaments in your children that may discourage you.  Keep this list in a place where you can always be reminded to pray regarding them, and consider who you can enlist to encourage your child in these areas (along side of you).  Carefully consider how you can make the overarching tone of your relationship with your child one of encouragement.  Please comment and let us know how we can pray for you in your walk, attempting to be more like David with Solomon.  or God with us.

[My note:  It is very difficult for me personally, psychologically, to see the roses over the thorns many times with my children.  This prohibits me from giving them the encouragement that I need to.  Especially with my son, who is covered in thorns.  This lesson has challenged me.  I will be praying for each of you in your own lives and request you cover my family in yours. Thank you for this.]__________________

Don’t forget, on October 1st, we will begin our brand new Online Bible Study, right here, entitled “Winning Him Without Words” by Lynn Donovan and Dineen Miller.  If you are in an unequally spiritual marriage, you won’t want to miss this study!!  It is AMAZING! (as a personal note, I have read this book – I have communicated with these authors over the past year and they are amazing.  Their personal stories changed my life.  Their words confirmed what my own pastor said when he counseled me in my own marriage.  I pray that you will join us for this study as well!)

To sign up for this study, please send an email to:  Womens@GirlfriendsCoffeeHour.com and we will send you all the details you need to get started!

Don’t forget to stop by Craig’s blog to see what the guys are up to with The Resolution for Men.

www.adversusmundi.wordpress.com

Be sure to jump on over to our Facebook Group for the daily activity!! If you do not yet belong to this group, and would like to, send us an email at GirlfriendsCoffeeHour@gmail.com with FB GROUP in the subject line, and we’ll be glad to add you!

 With the greatest love ever and many hugs,

<3 Kelley

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Diane’s Journey to GCH: decaf

September 12, 2012 by

Introducing……

GCH: decaf blogger Diane Meyers

Have you ever had a desire that God has put on your heart that is so strong that you honestly feel like you are going to just die if you do not do something about that very desire?  That may seem a little extreme, but for the last year or so I have been feeling that do-or-die feeling!

At this time the Lord had saved me, healed me, and completely restored me from an abusive relationship that I was miserably trapped in for three years.   I was so beyond thankful to the Lord for the miracle He has done in my life (still am!) that I now wanted to help every single person I came into contact with find Jesus’ love for themselves.  I figured out what I thought was the best way to go about doing this.  I worked myself to complete exhaustion.  I remember hearing someone say that we cannot just do things and expect God to bless us… we have to go where God is ever so quietly calling us to go.  When I heard that, it was like God himself was speaking to my heart.  This is exactly what I was doing.  All along what I really wanted was to come along side beautiful young women and encourage them and help them grow in a relationship with Christ.  I wanted to be there for girls just like so many women were there for me when I needed them.  I wanted to tell them that ultimately we have Jesus always and forever, he is the one that dries all our tears, holds us when we just need a hug, protects us from complete brokenness, saves us when we need a Savior, and loves us no matter what we have done, and no matter what we can ever do-his love is never-ending, never-fading, and the beauty that shines through us each and every day!

I never thought this opportunity would come.  I never thought I would ever be worthy or deserving of doing what I wanted to do…life just doesn’t happen like that, is what I believed.  What a lie from satan!  God was giving me these desires… that is one thing I am sure of.  God does not just give us the desires to watch them wash away.  He has been preparing our hearts for HIS desires since before we were ever a heartbeat in our mother’s womb.  Here I was trying to attempt to make sure I got just what I wanted, just to realize God already had it all along at GCH: decaf!

I knew the moment I saw the first little blurb about GCH: decaf (a ministry all about encouraging beautiful young women, helping them grow in their relationship with Christ, coming along side of them to be an example of Jesus’ love, mercy and grace, witnessing young women on fire for Jesus coming together and simply flourishing in the presence of Jesus Christ, being a support system) ok this is where I am supposed to be!  This is what the Lord has been preparing for me!  GCH: decaf is what I was so patiently (ok, maybe impatiently…) waiting for all along!

Maybe you are reading this and thinking of your daughter……

Do you desire for her to have a safe place where she can grow in her walk with Christ, a place for her to build lasting friendships with sisters in Christ!? 

That is what WE desire for her! 

Maybe your daughter is reading this, and in that case.. I am so excited she is!  I remember being a teenager, I remember how tough it was, I remember desiring to have relationships with Christians who had the same morals and standards that I had adopted from God.  I remember the hurts that went along with lots of things that happened to me from the time I was 14-19.  I remember wanting to grow in my relationship with God…. but I was not sure how to do that.  Our first study will be talking about these specific issues along with so many more!

It is my prayer that you join a small group here at GCH: decaf so that you may be connected with young girls who are going through life just like you are.  It is my prayer that you join our small groups to hear encouragement and enjoy a safe place to share your heart with others!  Maybe you’re like me and all you need to read is a little blurb about GCH: decaf to know that this is where the Lord wants YOU to be too! 

My name is Diane Meyers, and I am where I want to be, in the Lord’s will for me at GCH: decaf!  I am here to encourage young women.  I am here to use the gifts the Lord has blessed me with to share HIM with the world!  I am so beyond excited and thankful to be here, with you!

Please check out many blurbs about GCH: decaf here: https://www.facebook.com/GCHdecaf.  Be sure to email Megan (who just so happened to follow the Lord’s will to put together GCH: decaf) if you would like to join a small group or if you have any questions: Teens@girlfriendscoffeehour.com .  Our first study will start October 1!  We will be studying A Daughter’s Worth by Ava Sturgeon.

________________________________________

Diane Meyers will be blogging for you right here on the GCH: decaf blog every Monday! She is loving, caring, genuine, and perfectly imperfect.  At almost 24 years of age, she lives in Pittsburgh, PA surrounded by a ton of family and loved ones God has given her to share life with.  To the world, Diane may be single, but to her she has the best date of all… Jesus!  Diane has been touched by so many angels in her life, and desires to be that angel in someone else’s life.  God has given her a huge passion for writing.  Her writings are 100% God inspired and come directly from her heart.   

Diane is very involved with the children’s ministry at her church, and is also a spiritual coach for a ministry aimed toward the youth.  She desires for every single person to know that they do not have to be perfect; they just need to accept the perfect love of their perfect Savior in Heaven.  She knows first-hand how God turns our imperfections into His perfections with His love.  She sees HIS beauty in all of those imperfections. We are honored that God brought her to us as part of the GCH: decaf  Leadership Team!

You can follow Diane’s personal blog here: www.coveredinpink.wordpress.com

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Resolution for Women- The Soul Shaper

September 11, 2012 by

1 John 3:18

“We must not love with word or speech, but with truth and action.”

___________________________

In today’s lesson, Priscilla talks about 3 roles a mother must take on if they are going to love their children well….

The Soul Shaper

The Intentional Encourager

The Discipline Dealer

Mama and dear friend…. I need you to understand right now that YOU are a soul shaper for your children.

It is so vitally important that we pray for our children. These prayers need to start forming in our spirit before we even have them and they must continue to grace our hearts and lips even after they leave our nest and have their own homes and children.

A Soul shaper must….

  • beware that her prayers for her child are significant
  • understand that once her child has received salvation, she is God’s primary tool to work alongside the Holy Spirit to see that the transforming process occurs effectively in her child’s soul.
  • know that she cannot accomplish this without involving her church and relatives to assist in the effort.
  • know along with her spouse that the main responsibility of this soul shaping is theirs.
  • not allow anyone else to take her or her spouse’s place as the primary influencers in the child’s life
  • help the child to become sensitive to God’s conviction
  • teach the child how to recognize God’s way of directing them through their conscience
  • continue to walk this out along with the Holy Spirit as the child grows and matures.
  • continue to seek the Lord for guidance for how she can be used to guide her children in their adult lives.

Dear friends, I hope with all my heart that you see what an intentionally BOLD role you play as your child’s soul shaper! You cannot be lazy about it or turn a blind eye. You must intentionally, every single day make this deliberate choice to invite the Holy Spirit to help you in your actions and speech in order to mold your child’s soul. What an honor and privilege!!!

Please…. if you haven’t already been walking out this bold task, start today. Don’t look back but look straight ahead at what the Lord is asking of you on behalf of His children that He has entrusted you with on this earth. HE deserves no less and neither do they. You will not be perfect… I hope you know that and are okay with that. Being human, we are flawed…. but what is so important is that you believe with your whole heart that your parenting is KINGDOM BUSINESS!!!!

You also must come at this call from a proactive stance and not one of defense. Don’t wait until your child is in trouble to cover them in scripture… we must each live each day being creative and consistent in how we clothe our children in the Word of God. What does this look like?

  • diligently and deliberately read the Bible to your kids
  • post scripture throughout the house
  • play worship music
  • be in fellowship with other believers
  • write scripture on the napkin in their lunch for school
  • send them scriptures in txt messages and emails
  • do devotional together as a family
  • ___________________________. (you fill in the blank)

we all know that if WE as women and mothers love the Lord with all our heart, soul, mind and strength, that we can only then be able to fill this role to its potential and be our best for our children. If you are not regularly in the Word and being fed spiritually…. make it happen today. If you’re not going to church regularly, start this weekend. Your children, wether unborn, non-biological or adult NEED you to! As Priscilla so eloquently puts it….

“A transformed child start with a transformed mom”

________________________

Let’s Pray:

Lord, we ask that you give us bold revelation into this area of our lives today. We don’t want to be the same, Father…. we yearn to be THIS deliberate for our children, who are your’s first. Renew our hearts, minds and spirits to be able to give each of them all we have everyday to work alongside the Holy Spirit in shaping their souls. Thank you for this provision, Lord, and we thank you in advance for all you will do. Amen <3

Your Assignment:

Please leave a comment below telling us how you can creatively live your Christian life openly before your children… in REAL LIFE…. be realistic here, friends and tell us what you are already doing or what you are going to do. If you don;t have children of your own, tell us how you can do this with other children in your life. If your kids are grown, how can you begin to think outside the box to do this? If your children are very young, how can you creatively do this now?

___________________

Don’t forget, on October 1st, we will begin our brand new Online Bible Study, right here, entitled “Winning Him Without Words” by Lynn Donovan and Dineen Miller.  If you are in an unequally spiritual marriage, you won’t want to miss this study!!  It is AMAZING!

To sign up for this study, please send an email to:  Womens@GirlfriendsCoffeeHour.com and we will send you all the details you need to get started!

Don’t forget to stop by Craig’s blog to see what the guys are up to with The Resolution for Men.

www.adversusmundi.wordpress.com

Be sure to jump on over to our Facebook Group for the daily activity!! If you do not yet belong to this group, and would like to, send us an email at GirlfriendsCoffeeHour@gmail.com with FB GROUP in the subject line, and we’ll be glad to add you!

 Be a Blessing today and everyday,

Megan 🙂

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Resolution for Women – True Love

September 10, 2012 by

1 John 3:18

“We must not love with word or speech, but with truth and action.”

___________________________

Are you a “loving” mom, or a mom who is “in-love” with your child?

Is it important to you to be your child’s best friend, or to be one that shows them true love?

I’ve been both.  I’ve been the one that shows love discipline and teaching; and I’ve been the one who just wants to be their best friend!  Let’s fact it, parenting is not for the faint-hearted, is it??

Priscilla makes some very good points in this chapter:

  • Our primary goal as mothers is teaching our children God’s truth.
  • Love doesn’t always come in the form of words.
  • Love is an action.
  • Parenting is not an easy job!
  • Parenting is a rewarding job!
  • A fair share of your actions toward your children will not always translate love.
  • Sometimes kids see our love action as being too strict, or overbearing.

I remember times when my kids were little when they used to think that I was over-protective, to the point that they told all their friends that I wouldn’t let them play out in the street for fear that a plane would crash into them! 🙂  Yes, it was a joke, but in their eyes, they really did see me as too protective.  In my eyes, I was loving them.  Huge difference.

We used to laugh about the plane crashing into them, but today they are both mothers, and the one daughter who used to joke about the plane the most, is the mom who is the strictest with her children! Ha!    I just want to look at her one day and say “When will the plane crash??” 🙂

I’ve seen parents who think their only responsibility is to be “friends” with their kids.  Friends to the point that it was unheard of to say “no” to their kids.  I saw this in my own home when my husband and I moved under one roof.  He had two teenage boys still at home, and his only goal was to be their friend.  All I saw was two boys who were headed for a serious crash when the reality of True Life hit them!  They had much to learn that life wasn’t all about getting whatever they wanted, when they wanted it.  This type of “friendship” with his boys caused us, and the boys, a lot of heartache for the first few years as a family.  But, my husband began to see how important it was to change that relationship with his boys and start teaching them to be responsible adults, who would be ready for real life when they left home.  It wasn’t an easy change-over, that’s for sure.  But we all made it out alive, Praise God!

Really, the only advice I can give new parents, or parents with fairly young children at home, please stop worrying about being their best friend!  As Priscilla said in this chapter, True Love is serious business!  We have the responsibility of training this human life in the way he/she should go, so that when they are old, they will not depart from it.  Your children need YOU to be a parent….not their friend.  There’s always time to be their best friend later in years, when they really need it!

As my youngest said to me one day, “Mom, you were always the hardest on us; but because you were, I always knew that you loved us.”  You will never know what music that was to my ears!

________________________

Let’s Pray:

Father, we lift our children to You today and we thank You for the awesome responsibility You have given us.  We thank You Lord for loaning these children to us for a short period of time, to train them in the way they should go.  We thank You Lord for the patience we will need during this time of actually demonstrating our love through action, and not just through words.  Help us Lord to be the parent that YOU need us to be for each child in our life.

Father, for struggling families out there, Lord, I ask for Your help in repairing damage that has already been done.  Help restore the relationships that have gone sour.  Help restore forgiveness, as well, Lord.

In Jesus’ Name, AMEN!!

Your Assignment:

Please leave a comment below telling us in what way you struggle the most in demonstrating love to your child, in action. How can we pray for you today to have a better relationship with your child(ren)?

___________________

Don’t forget, on October 1st, we will begin our brand new Online Bible Study, right here, entitled “Winning Him Without Words” by Lynn Donovan and Dineen Miller.  If you are in an unequally spiritual marriage, you won’t want to miss this study!!  It is AMAZING!

To sign up for this study, please send an email to:  Womens@GirlfriendsCoffeeHour.com and we will send you all the details you need to get started!

Don’t forget to stop by Craig’s blog to see what the guys are up to with The Resolution for Men.

www.adversusmundi.wordpress.com

 

Be sure to jump on over to our Facebook Group for the daily activity!! If you do not yet belong to this group, and would like to, send us an email at GirlfriendsCoffeeHour@gmail.com with FB GROUP in the subject line, and we’ll be glad to add you!

 

That’s it for today!  Megan will be here tomorrow blogging about the next chapter, “The Soul Shaper”.  I hope you will join us!

 

Living Intentionally to Be a Blessing to My Children,

 

 

 

 

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Resolution for Women – Chapter 11 – Loving My Children

September 9, 2012 by

“We must not love with word or speech,

but with truth and action.”

1 John 3:18

 

____________________________________________________

This week we dive into Chapter 11 full force and learn how to resolve to train our kids in righteousness.  How to demonstrate to our children how to really love God with all their hearts, minds, and strength, and to train them to respect authority and live responsibly.  This is going to be yet another amazing Chapter!!

Your Reading Assignment for this Week:

Monday:  Read pages 206 thru 210:  True Love

Tuesday: Read pages 211 thru 216: The Soul Shaper

Wednesday: Read pages 217 thru 221: The Intentional Encourager

Thursday:  Read pages 222 thru 226: The Discipline Dealer

Friday: Come back here for our Weekly Overview

Be sure to come back here each day of this week to read our blog posts about this awesome chapter from The Resolution for Women by Priscilla Shirer.  We have just 2 more sections to complete before we end this current bible study!  Wow! Where did the time go!!

_________________________________

I would like to take this opportunity to ask for your prayers for my family.  We lost a very dear loved one this weekend, to cancer.  He was my step-father for many years.  He and my mother were divorced many years ago, but he always remained my step-father in my heart; and always remained the PawPaw to my children, and their children.

Delvis Glenn Chandler

you will be missed by many.

We love you!

Rest In Peace

________________________________

On October 1st, right here on the Featured section of our blog, we will begin this 13-week bible study

“Winning Him Without Words…

10 Keys to Thriving in your Spiritually Mismatched Marriage”

by Lynn Donovan and Dineen Miller.

We will cover topics such as: Staying Connected to Your Man, Discovering the Essentials to Love; Trading perfection for authenticity; Cherishing each new season, and so much more!!   This book is amazing ladies, and I can’t wait to get started studying it with you!!  You will need to purchase this book for this study.  This book, a journal, and your bible is all you will need to participate.

If you haven’t already signed up for this particular study, please email us at

Womens@GirlfriendsCoffeeHour.com

and we will send you all the details you need to get signed up!!

Enjoy the rest of your Weekend!

In His Love,

 

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Resolution for Women – Weekly Overview “Fulfilling My Husband”

September 7, 2012 by

Happy Friday!!!  🙂

Here is this weeks video blog!! 😉

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Have a GREAT Weekend Everyone!

See you on Sunday!

Filed Under: Women's Ministry Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Resolution for Women – Hopes and Fears

September 5, 2012 by

If your husband were to describe your marriage to a stranger, what do you think he would say?  If he were to describe you, as his wife, to this stranger, what do you think he would say?

Last night, Girlfriends Coffee Hour hosted a conference call with two women who have both been married 30+ years.  In today’s society, 30 years is an amazing feat!  Together these two women shared much wisdom!  I would like to reiterate what was shared on this call because it just fits perfectly with this chapter of The Resolution for Women.

The keys to a successful marriage:

  • Jesus has to be the foundation.  Without Him, our foundation will not be secure and stable.
  • Choosing is critical to a successful marriage.  Choosing to love him, respect, and encourage him, on a daily basis.  Choosing to see the best in him.  Choosing to always provide for him, and be there for him.
  • Remembering that marriage is a COVENANT.  There is no room for the word “divorce” in your vocabulary!  “No matter what, I will choose to love and to stay!”  Divorce is NOT an option!
  • Mutual respect
  • Never taking each other too seriously.  Being able to laugh with each other.
  • Dating at least 2 times a month to keep the romance alive.
  • Know each others “love language”.
  • Spend time in the Word, and in Prayer.  This is the glue that will hold your marriage together.
  • Love Unconditionally
  • Show your husband respect.
  • Encourage your husband.
  • Support your husband in every way.
  • Pray for your husband.
  • NEVER speak badly about your husband to others.  EVER!

This was an amazing call last night, and I was very blessed by the words of wisdom that were shared by both of our Guest Speakers!

________________

In this chapter of Resolution for Women, we are discussing our husbands Hopes and Fears.  The two fears that were mentioned in this chapter were “Fear of being inadequate” and “Fear of being controlled.  I’m not going to spend a lot of time going over the details of each of these fears, because it’s all available to you in the book.  But, what I am going to focus on today are some statements that were shared in this chapter that stood out to me.  I’d like to reiterate these statements that Priscilla mentioned, to help us remain focused on areas that will benefit our ability to fulfill our husbands.

I want to start by asking a question mentioned on page 194, but in my own words:  “What would your husband do differently if he knew he couldn’t lose your love and respect, no matter what he did?”

Would he be able to be free to do what he’s always wanted to do?  Or would he be held back by his fear of what you would think of him?

Would he be assured of your encouragement and support?  Would he know without a doubt that you would support him and inspire him to do even greater things?  What do you think it would do for him emotionally if you were to be 100% supportive of his dream?

As Priscilla says, “Only one way to find out.”

Your husband needs to know that you trust him.  He needs to know that you believe that he is capable, honorable, and worthy of your attention and admiration.  He needs to know that you believe in him despite his inadequacies.  He needs to know that you are praying for him.  He needs to know that your expectations of him are not higher than they should be!  None of us are perfect, and we all have inadequacies.  Ask yourself how it feels (or would feel) if your husband did not support your dream.  Put yourself in his shoes, and think about what YOU would need from him…and then give exactly that to him in support of his dream.

Maybe your husband hasn’t always made the right choices.  Maybe he isn’t the best with money.  Maybe he hasn’t been the best role model to your children. But even so, YOU CAN CHANGE YOUR THOUGHTS ABOUT HIM!  You can resolve to be a better encourager.  You can become better at affirming him, supporting him, and respecting him.  If this is an area that you struggle with, seek counseling from your Pastor, or a Christian Counselor to help re-establish this trust and confidence in him, and to become more of his cheerleader than someone who constantly puts him down.

You are the helpmeet God created for your husband.  God created YOU to be the one who shows respect, love, honor and encouragement to your husband.  If this doesn’t come easy for you in your own marriage, then seek God for His wisdom and direction. Ask God into your marriage if He isn’t a part of it already.  Pray for your husband.  Ask God to help him in the areas that he is weak, or needs wisdom.  PRAYER WORKS Ladies!  Prayer works MUCH BETTER than nagging does, any day of the week!!  🙂

These ladies on last nights conference call shared much wisdom with us.  After 30+ years of marriage, they still go out on dates.  They still hold hands.  He still opens the door for her.  He still puts his arm around her when they sit together.  They still laugh together.  They pray together.  They trust each other.   They both respect their husbands.

What can you do today, right now, to start showing your husband the respect and honor that he so strongly desires?  To feel like a real man?  I want to reiterate what Priscilla shared in this chapter on how you can start making the necessary changes to fulfill your husband….today:

  • Start with just one day.  24 hours.
  • REFUSE to allow yourself to correct him, or offer any unsolicited advice, or criticize his choices.
  • Go to the restaurant HE wants.
  • Let the kids wear the clothes HE picked out, even if they don’t match!!

Here a few of my own:

  • Don’t criticize his driving.
  • ASK for his opinion and then listen to it!
  • Don’t put down his family in front of others.
  • Don’t disrespect him at home, or in front of others; especially in front of the children!
  • Have a good meal on the table when he gets home.
  • Thank him for being a hard worker and taking care of the family financially.
  • Thank him for being such a good dad.
  • Tell him what a great lover he is.
  • Tell him what a great husband he is.
  • Tell him how handsome he is.
  • Tell him you love him every single day.
  • Kiss him hello and goodbye, every day.
  • Tell him how proud you are to be his wife.

These are just few suggestions.  I know there are plenty of books and online sites that are great tools to use to find ways to encourage your husband.  Focus on the Family has some great articles on this subject!!  Take the time to look it up, and then DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!  🙂  I know without a doubt your husband will appreciate it, and you will begin to see changes in him that are for the better! And that’s a promise!

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Let’s Pray:

Father, thank You so much for the husband You have given each one of us.  Help us to be the kind of wife that he needs every day.  Help us to be the perfect helpmeet that You created us to be.  In Jesus’ Name, AMEN!

Your Assignment:

In the comment section below, list 3 things that you LOVE about your husband, and then tonight when you are alone with him, tell him exactly what you have shared here.  I KNOW he will appreciate it!!

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After you have commented below, go back to our Online Bible Study Group on Facebook to see what our Daily Activity is. If you do not yet belong to our OBS Facebook group, and would like to, please send an email to: GirlfriendsCoffeeHour@gmail.com  

We’ll send you the details needed to get you into this group!

Don’t forget to stop by Craig’s blog to see what the guys are up to with The Resolution for Men.

www.adversusmundi.wordpress.com

Be blessed!

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Resolution for Women: Marriage Proposal

September 4, 2012 by

I was so excited when I logged on to Facebook this morning to see that a very good friend of mine got engaged over the holiday weekend. HOW EXCITING…. right?!?!??!

I noticed yesterday that she had started pinning things like bouquet designs and wedding dresses on Pinterest… so I did have a hunch, but seeing it on my Facebook homepage made it real. She is about to live a wonderful season of planning and prepping…. designing her special day that she has dreamed of since she was a young girl. As I read today’s chapter, I wondered if anyone would be having the real-deal conversation with her like Priscilla’s friend had with her so many years ago.

“Are you sure this is what you want to do?”

Believe me, ladies….. when I was a little girl twirling in my bedroom fantasizing about my wedding day, I never dreamed of having 5 kids at the altar along with my 2nd husband! YIKES!!! Not what dreams are made of, right? Well, before Craig and I even said “I do” we had gone through more in the year and a half we dated than most couples go through in their whole lifetime of marriage! In fact, to this day, I have friends who come to be at the blossoming of a new, blended family relationship for advice because they saw what we lives for so many years and how hard it was and want me to answer for them “So…… has it been worth it?”

Wether you are in your first marriage, second, third or fourth……. your spouse must come first and they must intentionally get your very best or it will just not work. You can not give your kids, family or friends that top spot under God Almighty! Once Craig and I understood this balance and started living our life this way, everything in our relationship came into focus and our entire household was positively effected.

No matter what stage of life, or marriage, we are in, we all want to be fulfilled. We all want our deepest needs to be met and our husband wants this same thing. As Priscilla points out, “He may not be fulfilling his side of the bargain at the moment. But remember, this book is not about him. The reality is, you cannot change him. But you can pinpoint some changes in yourself, and then you can bring that new resolve to your marriage. You can be faithful. That much you can do.”

You may not WANT to do it, but you really need to do it anyway. God calls you to do it. You answer to Him above all else… and He calls us to act and live above our wants as we are not of this world.

I have a story to share that is not a-typical for second marriages, especially when there are children involved.

After the first few years of our marriage, Craig and I were not doing well as we let our house and our lives be led by fear. Craig was not putting me first (after God) because he was scared of his ex-wife and what she might do if he ever stood up to her or “rocked the boat.” This was killing our marriage because not only was I the primary caregiver for all the kids, but I had no voice and no rights. He would give-in to her requests even when it was not in the kids’ or our family’s best interests just to avoid her anger or her wrath. Slowly, it made me retreat and was killing me on the inside because I felt like I didn’t matter and I was scared that it could all be taken from me at any moment. I had given my heart away to these kids and my heart got trampled on every time I turned around. I did not feel safe and I did not feel valued.

Craig finally realized what he was doing and saved our marriage and our family by putting us all in our proper place. It took only saying to his ex a few times “I’ll talk to Megan about it and get back to you” before she got the drill and soon started to say to him “I know you need to run this by Megan but…” VICTORY!!!! He showed me that I came first which also showed the kids how to value their spouse.

I need to do the same.

I cannot have the kids or work or other people taking my top spot. Craig has to come first, or we are out of balance again. What we have found is that once we have our marital balance in place, everything else falls into line and we have a much happier home. It takes a lot of work and intentional actions, but it is so worth it to be able to model this to our kids and show each other how much we value our God and our family by having our spouse in their proper priority.

As you begin this journey this week, list some of your husband’s characteristics that you wish would change but likely will not. Then, record the way YOU can change to adapt to your husband’s characteristics if these attributes are never altered. We’ll look at this later in the week.

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Let’s Pray

Dear Heavenly Father….. no matter what marital season we are in, we need to check our priorities to Your Word. Help us today to begin to “do it anyway” to fulfill our husband’s needs for Your to get all the glory! Lord, show us today how we can make the most immediate impact and help us to lift each other up in prayer to be our best in our marriages. Lord, for those of us who are not in a marriage currently, speak to our hearts about how to best prepare to be able to give our best to our mates. We love you, Lord, and we thank you for showing us all we need to be our best for Your glory! In Jesus’ mighty name we pray, amen <3

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Your Assignment:

In the comment section below, tell us what you might say if you were counseling young woman on the eve of her wedding day. Do you feel that you have accepted the responsibilities marriage has required or have you resisted them?

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After you have commented below, go back to our Online Bible Study Group on Facebook to see what our Daily FUN Activity is. If you do not yet belong to our OBS Facebook group, and would like to, please send an email to:

GirlfriendsCoffeeHour@gmail.com

We’ll send you the details needed to get you into this group!

Don’t forget to stop by Craig’s blog to see what the guys are up to with The Resolution for Men.

www.adversusmundi.wordpress.com

Many blessings,

Megan 🙂

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The Resolution for Women – How do you Heal an Unbroken Heart

August 29, 2012 by

Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom Shall I send? And who will go for us?” And I said, “Here am I, Send me!

Isaiah 6:8

Wow, what a week to have me blog for this chapter!  I just came back from a life changing trip to Nicaragua.  This wasn’t my first mission trip though, in fact, last year I went to Guatemala with all intentions of going back. God started working on me way before we left on August 11.  I signed up to go to Guatemala then a Proverbs 31 She Speaks conference was scheduled in the same month – due to financial reasons I had to choose one or the other.  I chose Proverbs 31 as I felt like God was working on me to expand my personal ministry and begin writing or speaking.  So….I registered for the conference.  A few weeks later at church I see where my own church is taking their first independent mission trip to Nicaragua! Immediately God let me know that I was supposed to be on that team  – so I cancelled the conference registration and joined the missionary team.   My wonderful husband had given me the conference money which I now needed for the mission trip and I was able to raise the rest without issue. Yes, God was at work.  When I almost raised all the money needed, the people at work asked me how much more I needed, I told them $125 – they raised $82 for me.  I talked to our pastor taking us, his records had me only owing $80 and I had just received $82!  I preface this story telling you this so you understand how from the very beginning, when I was asking God to show me what ministry activity I was supposed to participate in – He was there – setting me up the entire time.

With that resolved, Like Priscilla in our story today, I now prayed for a broken heart – for the biggest, cracked, shattered, brokest broken heart because you just can’t heal one that is unbroken.  I truly wanted to FEEL the pain, I wanted to understand, I didn’t just want to go through the motions.  I needed to be broke.  Does that make sense?

The first 5 days of our mission trip were spent in a village called Salinas Grande.  It is on the ocean and is built around a salt mine. It was about 8 miles of dirt roads, Many houses were lean-to’s wrapped in black plastic, some were block but were open to weather.  People rode horses and yes, we saw many horses with make-shift wagons (piece of flat plywood) that they would ride multiple people or things on.  Most had electricity with mostly 1 lightbulb hanging for light. However running water was not an everyday gift in most houses.  People went with buckets and containers to get their water; sometimes on bikes, sometimes on horses, sometimes walking.   Oh yes, the heart was breaking already.  Thank you Jesus.  How can we have so much and they have so little?  Why God?

We met a 90-year-old beautiful, precious woman at one of the feeding programs.  She was manually hoisting the water from a very deep well with a bucket and pulley.  Our guys tried to lift the water to see how she managed, they could not lift it far!  God, she’s 90 and happy, I said.  This is life for her; but why? We all have clean running water into our homes – and this elderly sweet lady had to drop a bucket into a well for hers?  More heart break….I gave this woman the biggest hug I could possibly give.  There is no language barrier with a hug!  And the GREATest news…..We had a person on our team who dealt with water pumps at work and we were able to give this her running water at the flip of a switch.  No more pulling her water up with a 10 gallon bucket!

The children were beautiful.   They would come to the feeding programs at lunch time and get a nice hot lunch. These are funded by missionary teams through Open Eyes Ministries. They would come up on bikes or walking with their empty bowls and spoons and for some, this might be the only full meal a day they get.   Can you feel my heart shattering…..being totally broken.  And I prayed for this! I needed this!  The ladies would cook over their fires, no stoves for them, preparing a big bowl of rice, a big bowl of beans, and a big bowl of some kind of meat and vegetables and we would serve these beautiful little people.  We’d play with them – they loved to play ‘football’ (soccer), we had some doing the hokey pokey with us and a translator – All God’s people, but living a different kind of life.

We went into a pastor’s home for a sewing ministry – the young girls were learning how to sew and were making school uniforms to help furnish uniforms to the children at schools that didn’t have the money for them.  Someone in ministry had gotten them Brother Sewing Machines to work with – they looked so out-of-place in this pastors open house with chickens and little biddies running through it – they even had a couple of green parakeets  running around – but they were happy.  It was HOT and there wasn’t much air running through the house, but here these girls sat learning a trade  because someone cared.  Amazing Grace! God is so good! The navy blue skirts they made had perfect pleats.  I stood in awe.  I had to donate to this ministry.  They were working so hard to give back and they didn’t have enough themselves.  —-crash, shatter—-bang…

I know this is getting long-winded, but I have to tell you about the final straw!  We went into the schools to teach lessons to the children. We taught Honesty, Optimism, Integrity, and on the last day we took them the gospel.  I had the opportunity for the first time to stand up in front of this class and teach them about taking Jesus into their hearts, asking for forgiveness of their sins, teaching them that their slate would wash clean, and they would be new.  In my class, I had 22 students and a teacher pray the prayer of salvation!  Oh be still my heart!  Further shatter…..completely broken – emotionally exhausted.  We had 94 total give their hearts in the school that day!

I will end by telling you that I left Nicaragua with a shattered, broken, destroyed heart.  God made sure that it would never be the same again.  Even as it healed, the remnants of the cracks would remain.   I now know that my heart is in ministry for the lost.  For those that do not know Jesus Christ.  I am on a life mission to be part of the groups that change things in the world for those are less fortunate, and many times lost.   I won’t ever be the same person after this trip.  God used it to change me so I in turn could change the lives of others.  I’m thankful to Jesus for shattering my heart. For showing me the way.  I pray that if you have never had your heart spiritually broken, you pray for it.  Pray that God takes it and shatters in it pieces. The beauty of what you feel afterwards will change your life as it did mine.

_________________________

Let’s Pray

Dear Heavenly Father, Thank you for breaking my heart.  Thank you for allowing me to share my broken heart with others; allowing me to be a vessel for you.  Bless each one that reads this blog today and each one that doesn’t.  I pray that you will work in our lives, in our hearts, and mold us and shape us to be missionaries to the world – starting right here in our own towns and cities.  Thank you for the running water, the electricity, the way of life we have here in the USA.  Work with us so that we can take some of our wealth, spiritually and otherwise, to other places in the world, blessing your children there as we are blessed.  We ask these things in your name, Amen.

Your Assignment:

Perhaps you’ve been burned when trying to reach out too drastically, people have taken advantage of you or misunderstood your motives; but when you to go minister Christ’s love to another person, what is your real reason for going?  What’s a better way to evaluate your success than with measurable, feel-good results alone?

After you have commented below, go back to our Online Bible Study Group on Facebook to see what our Daily FUN Activity is. If you do not yet belong to our OBS Facebook group, and would like to, please send an email to:

GirlfriendsCoffeeHour@gmail.com

We’ll send you the details needed to get you into this group!

Don’t forget to stop by Craig’s blog to see what the guys are up to with The Resolution for Men.

www.adversusmundi.wordpress.com

With Big Hugs and a Big Heart, 

<3 Kelley

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Resolution for Women- Look Again

August 28, 2012 by

I feel so ill-equipped to write the blog post for today’s lesson. I pray you will bear with me as the Lord leads my fingers as they dance across the keyboard…..

Have you ever found yourself in a similar circumstance to the one that Priscilla describes in today’s lesson? Maybe it was at your church or a conference or even watching the news on television….. but have you ever been bombarded with image after image of horrible, unspeakable travesty that make you want to run from it and hide you face?

I have.

For me, it happened a month or two ago when I was catching up one afternoon on Facebook……

I’m “friends” with many of the teens I work with at church Thursday nights and, as you can imagine, I like to encourage them in their walk with the Lord in social media channels like Facebook. On this day, I was at a loss for what to say.

This BEAUTIFUL daughter of the King who I met through my own children at church had started dating a Muslim boy, had renounced her Christian faith, and was excited to show off her new look wearing her burqa veil. I didn’t know what to do. I could not click “like” but I also didn’t want to make her feel like she isn’t beautiful to me…… I wanted to reach through my laptop screen, scoop her into my arms, and help encourage her right back towards her Heavenly Father…… but I didn’t know how to do that in the constraints of reality… so I prayed.

I prayed a lot.

I started reading more and more about the Muslim faith and a woman’s place within that religion/ culture. I kept praying and learning and I found out that many members of my church family had been praying too.

THIS MORNING I popped on Facebook to post today’s FUN in our Resolution Group and I saw this gorgeous face staring back at me once again and my heart sank. Yes, I have been fervently praying for this precious soul, but I still have not acted on encouraging her or speaking into her life in any way…… and then God nudged me….

He reminded me that she sees every single word I post on my own Facebook page every day. She has not unfriended me so I get to assume that she has at least read one or two encouraging things I have posted! However, I know that God is calling me to be more bold than this with her heart…. and I know He will equip me with all I need to do His work in speaking into her heart…. or any other dear heart that He might show me that is in need of His pure, unconditional love.

My town has been in the national news over the recent past about many of our residents not being happy about a Muslim Training Center that is enlarging its current structure here and I am sad to say that I do not feel that some of my brothers and sisters in Christ here have handled their disapproval of this in the most constructive or Godly manner…. I don’t want to fall into that category…. but I also want to respond in a way that glorifies our Father and shows love for all people. I know he will give me the words to share with any young woman He puts in my path and I know He will also equip YOU to represent His Kingdom in a mighty way for whatever cause He places so intentionally on your dear heart.

Habakkuk 1:3

3 Why do you make me look at injustice? Why do you tolerate wrongdoing?

Priscilla reminds us that God puts these images and circumstances in front of us for a reason….. it is simply up to us whether we choose to do something about it or not. I know it is hard not to look away or just pray that SOMEONE ELSE will make a difference with it… but why not allow yourself to be that instrument, that willing vessel for God’s work to be done in this earth? Certain injustices will stir your heart in ways it wouldn’t the heart of another. God has divinely designed YOU to specifically impact that injustice in a unique way that only YOU can, dear sister. I know you don’t feel ready, or able, or prepared…. that’s what God is for!

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Let’s Pray

Dear Heavenly Father….. please please please break our hearts for what breaks your’s!!! Then, we ask that you give us the courage that only can come from You to act in such a bold way as to make a difference for Your Kingdom. We no longer want to stay idle….. we know that You have been preparing us to take action in this season and may You get all the glory, Lord! Give us your eyes, give us your heart, give us your love and give us your strength for we know we could never do this in our own power. Help us to lift one another up as we search our hearts, Lord, and may our relationships be ever strengthened for this stand we will take. In Your Son’s name we pray, amen <3

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Your Assignment:

In the comment section below, tell us about what global or local devastations are you currently seeing that stir compassion in your heart? What has kept you from doing something to help? What is one thing you can do and would be willing to make time to do?

________________________

After you have commented below, go back to our Online Bible Study Group on Facebook to see what our Daily FUN Activity is. If you do not yet belong to our OBS Facebook group, and would like to, please send an email to:

GirlfriendsCoffeeHour@gmail.com

We’ll send you the details needed to get you into this group!

Don’t forget to stop by Craig’s blog to see what the guys are up to with The Resolution for Men.

www.adversusmundi.wordpress.com

Many blessings,

Megan 🙂

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