November 22, 2024

Life’s Healing Choices: Chapter 6 – Relationships (pgs 166 – 203)

Choice 6:

Evaluate all my relationships.

Offer forgiveness to those who have hurt me and make amends for harm I’ve done to others.

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Forgiveness isn’t based on a feeling. Think about it, do you ever feel like forgiving someone? Or do you ruminate over ways to get back at them, or hope they get what they deserve? We keep score. We tally up the wrongs and maybe consider what they did right. We spout out “vengeance is MINE” but we forget the last part, ‘Says The Lord.” (Romans 12:19)
This week in Life’s Healing Choices we’ll take steps to mend relationships. Now, this doesn’t mean we will magically have the Hallmark moments, grand reunions, tears of joy from our reconciliations. But it will bring freedom from the harbored emotions when we let it all go in to His hands.

Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.

Colossians 3:13 NLT

Now, if you had asked me at the time what good would come out of my failed marriages, I would have said nothing. Today, I can look back and see God’s guiding hand, bringing me to a healthier place in life. All because of His mercy & love.

When I met my ex-husband, I was ending a bad marriage and an affair … definitely NOT the time I should have been getting involved with anyone else. But he swooped down and took care of me by making me laugh, doing small things to show he appreciated me, surprised me with visits & phone calls. It was the romancing and wooing we all want. Looking back, I should have seen signs that things weren’t going to work out well. Friends joked that he had bad luck, nothing ever turned out well for him, etc. Sometimes he was the brunt of the jokes just because his choices usually led to poor outcomes. But he had explanations for everything (excuses, really), and I wanted the companionship too much to listen. At one point, his mother commented that I was the best thing to ever happen to her son, but she didn’t know what I saw in him. Wow … did I really just hear that from his mom? Hindsight being what it is, I wish I had explored that comment more deeply. Instead, I listened when he told me the relationship with his mom had been strained since his parent’s divorce and he was closer to his dad.

Fast-forward about 4 years and you’ll find us married, raising a new baby, juggling jobs with family life. We quarreled about his excessive time on the computer or role-playing games with friends. He was too distracted to really be a good husband or father. We had just purchased our first home together. Our jobs were solid with promising futures. I had finished a college program; he was just starting one. The bad times seemed justified by the stress around us.

Suddenly, in a flash, it all came crumbling down around me. In the blink of an eye, I learned of lies, inner demons, addictions, and secrets that he had been keeping from me … from everyone, really. This changed everything about my life without my knowledge, agreement or consent! But for the first time in my life, I didn’t blame God. I didn’t curse at Him, demanding to know what I had done to deserve this fate.  I turned to God. I cried out to Him with a desperation I had not felt before, because I knew He was always there for me.

I prayed to the LORD, and he answered me.

He freed me from all my fears.

Those who look to him for help will be radiant with joy;

no shadow of shame will darken their faces.  

Ps 34:4-5 NLT

During this time, I was embraced by a church community. I learned what God’s “peace that passes all understanding” truly feels like (Philippians 4:7). I learned to lean on Him. I learned to accept help from others around me. I learned to trust again. I learned to love again. I learned to forgive.
I read once that harboring anger, resentment and an unforgiving heart only hurts us. The other person goes on with their life, without a care in the world, completely oblivious to the fact we’re fuming and miserable. We may be angry, but it doesn’t affect their life any anyway. So until we learn to let it go, it continues to eat away at us, hardening our heart more and more with each passing day.

It wasn’t an easy process, I assure you. And, I can’t give a date when it happened. I just know that through the following years, my heart softened as I learned more about my identity in Christ. I accepted more that he needed God’s love more than I needed to hate him. At one time, his dad asked if I could help find a Bible for him. They were not believers or church-going people. Rather than tell them what to buy, or ignore their request, I went out and bought one myself. Yes, I bought a Bible for my ex-husband even after all the pain he caused. I realized that I didn’t want to face God one day and have Him say, “all I wanted you to do was give him a Bible, and you said no.” I was being asked to do a simple task, and I answered His call.  People ask me how I could forgive him for what he did to his family and friends. How could I not knowing the lengths God went to in order to forgive me? Romans 3:24 CEV

But God treats us much better than we deserve, and because of Christ Jesus, he freely accepts us and sets us free from our sins.

I stood before a judge and gave my testimony, something called a “victim’s impact statement.” I shared the details of that fateful day. I recalled the excuses and lack of responsibility my ex-husband displayed. And, I shared that I forgave him and how it was by God’s grace that I could stand before them that day. It was the last time I saw my ex-husband face to face. I will never forget the past, and there are days when the pain is still felt and the sorrow washes over me. But the good news is that I don’t harbor the resentment, the animosity … the hatred that initially consumed me. All credit for this transformation of my heart goes to God, and God alone.
This week, we’ll explore more on making amends.

Reading Assignment for Week 6: Chapter 6 of Life’s Healing Choices
Monday: Laurie will discuss Principle 6: The Relationship Choice
Tuesday: Leslie will discuss How do you forgive Others (& Self)?
Wednesday: Kim will discuss Repair by Making Amends
Thursday: Amy will discuss Make The Choice
Friday: Laurie will bring it all back home with a recap of our week

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Let’s Pray:
Lord, we cannot begin to thank You enough for the gift of Your forgiveness through Jesus Christ. To know You gave Your Son on our behalf gives us strength to extend grace and mercy to those who have offended us. It’s not an easy task, but it is something we strive for through our healing process. We know that letting go of the pain and resentment is necessary so that we can become more like You. Bless all who read and follow our study this week. Amen.

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Power Verses for Chapter 5:
Luke 6:31-37
Hebrews 10:24
Philippians 2:4
Romans 12:17-18
Matthew 5:23-24
1 Peter 5:10
Colossians 3:13
Romans 8:31
2 Corinthians 12:9-10

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If you are interested in joining us for the “Life’s Healing Choices” online Bible study, click HERE to sign up.

Once we receive your registration, we will email you further details.

If you would like to email Amy in regards to this blog, please email her at:

Amy@GirlfriendsCoffeeHour.com

Life’s Healing Choices: Moving Past Guilt – Part 1 (Steps 1, 2, 3)

“Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord.”

Lamentations 3:40 NIV

Two years ago when I went into recovery, I entered into AA as part of an out-patient hospitalization. I came to the part of needing to write an inventory of my resentments. At that time, I had pages and pages that piled up so high I thought this whole step would be impossible. I rushed through them leaving out important details. I could not face them all, especially the REALLY PAINFUL ONES. The really painful ones showed like movie reruns in my mind. I also experienced physical symptoms such as a racing heart, difficulty breathing, chills, smells, and vivid details. These physical symptoms caused me to run from them even faster because every time I thought of the place or person I felt like it was happening to me all over again. Finally when I could hit “pause” on the movies (my life), I would take those people and places and kick them into that corner of my closet and cover them with all kinds of pretty stuff so I would not have to look at them anymore. If I don’t see them, then they can’t hurt me right? LOL!

Today I have only a few on that list because I have not totally surrendered them over to the Lord. The resentments I did give over to Him were healed and I became set free in a very powerful way that only God can do. Why I did not do this with all of them, I still ask myself that question. God took many of my resentments and showed me just how powerful He is by healing them so quickly. In my heart, I believe He was showing me proof of who He is and what He does. Some healed slower and hurt in the process. I am not going to lie, it was not fun. It was hard. I remember sitting on the couch scared and not trusting that God could take those things from me, but He did.

But unfortunately today, I still have a few I just have not fully dealt with and want to store them away in that dark corner in my closet. I don’t even want to see an edge of one sticking out. This realization shows me it’s time to do something about it. I started writing down each of these resentments that I’m allowing control over me today. My new list is much shorter today than my first one from two years ago. There are a few people, places, and events that I have been resenting, causing me anger, hurt, and fear that just won’t leave me alone. They have caused a lot of damage over the years to my thinking, attitude, relationships and self-worth. I would say the HARDEST part of this section has been writing down and owning up to my part. This is not easy at all! Yes, I have been severely hurt, but in each item on my list, I see that I have sinned also, and I am responsible for things I have done. “The Lord gave us a mind and a conscience. We cannot hide from ourselves” (Proverbs 20:27). I cannot keep blaming others, rationalizing, and deceiving myself any longer.

Prov20_27

I would like to briefly share a resentment of a place and event I have written down on my list. About six years ago, my doctors suggested having shock therapy for my major depression/bipolar illness. This was a last resort because nothing else worked, such as medications, hospitalizations, and psychotherapy. Wanting to die, I was desperate and decided to get started. My shock treatments consisted of twenty-five treatments. My husband had to take off work and also drive me two hours each time to the hospital. There were times our girls had to come along for the ride and had to wait on me for hours until my treatment was finished. Some weeks they had to stay with friends and family. Our girls also had to witness me confused as a side effect from shock treatment and having memory loss. Are you hearing my guilt I have been feeling for years right now?

As a result of my guilt, I have been parenting out of guilt. I have for years felt like a horrible mother who subjected our children to trauma over the years witnessing a sick mom who went to the hospital frequently and being sad a lot. I have felt guilty for so long I have actually believed my illness is my fault. I carry that guilt around with me every single day. It effects the way I parent, it affects me when I see the road sign of that hospital, it affects me when I read the word ECT (electro-compulsive therapy/shock treatment), it affects me when I see electrodes hooked up to people at the hospital, and all the details of the actual event. This whole situation and guilty feelings from it have consumed me for years.

Today I am ready to ask for forgiveness and be set free!If we freely admit that we have sinned, we find God utterly reliable and straightforward-He forgives our sin and makes us thoroughly clean from all that is evil” (1 John 1:9).  I have been sinning by not forgiving myself. I have been consumed with fear continuing to let these past events hurt me deeply over and over again. The really exciting news is by confessing this, sharing this, God will forgive me! Come now, let’s settle this,” says the LORD. Though your sins are like scarlet, I will make them as white as snow. Though they are red like crimson, I will make them as white as wool” (Isaiah 1:18).  I don’t have to bribe Him, or beg Him to forgive me; I just have to believe He will.

Are you ready to Move Past Guilt? Are you ready to take this step and transform your life? Take this step and get ready for God to do really great things in your life. Let’s get to work and start taking a personal inventory.

– Make time to begin your inventory

– Open your heart and your mind

– Rely on God’s grace

– Analyze your past, honestly

– List both the Good and Bad choices and events in your life

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Let’s Pray:

Father God, we desperately need You. Lord, how incredible it is to believe that our sins are covered and our guilt has been forgiven! Lord, through this study, continue to reveal to us what makes You sad and lead us along the path of everlasting life. (Psalm 139:23, 24 TBL) Lord, please give strength to everyone ready to make a change in their lives. Please give us courage to confess faults and come clean. Father, we are all so ready to let You set us free from our hurts, hang-ups, and habits.

Your Assignment:

Make some time to be alone with no interruptions. Open up your heart and mind to let God reveal what you need to see. “Search me, O God, and know my heart; test my thoughts. Point out anything You find that makes You sad and lead me along the path of everlasting life” Psalms 139:23, 24.

 

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If you are interested in joining us for this amazing Online Bible Study, click HERE to sign up. Once we receive your registration, we will email you further details.

If you would like to send a private email to Leslie in regards to this blog, please email her at:
Leslie@GirlfriendsCoffeeHour.com

Love Letters from God by Diane Meyers

Today, we want to introduce you to a new blog by Diane Meyers.  Diane was a part of our Singles Ministry during the last bible study that we shared, and then decided she needed to focus on the Teens ministry instead; but her heart was still with the Singles.  She shared with me some of her personal journaling, and throughout that the idea of “Love Letters from God” developed.

Diane will share her letters once a month on the Singles blog.  I hope you enjoy her writing, and these awesome letters, as much as I have!  ~~ Christi Wilson, Founder of Girlfriends Coffee Hour

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My story is made up of many love letters written from my heart to God’s heart and from His to mine.  I open up to Him with a pen in my hand and a journal in my lap.  The Lord speaks to me through my writings and I am beyond excited to share with you bits and pieces of different letters I have from God.  I share parts of my story so that God’s love, power, grace, forgiveness, and perfectness may be showcased.  As you read, I pray the Lord grabs a hold of your heart and fills you with hope!

Psalm 34:5 Those who look to him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame.

~*~*~*~*~

Dear Precious Daughter,

Did you know that you are beautiful?  No matter what you see when you look in the mirror, my beauty is there for you to hold onto.  Do you know what I see when I look down and see your face?  I see my princess, the one I have chosen to love and care for.  I care for you with the most perfect love you will ever experience.  Such love will bring joy to your face.  What is this shame you are hiding yourself in?  This was never intended for you to carry.  I desire so strongly to take the shame you hide your face in every day away from your hands.  I pray that you will see MY beauty that radiates through you from your heart.

When I think of you I think of our beautiful story we have together.  The times where you cannot see me are the times you refuse to get rid of this shame.  Do you know the beautiful story we have together?  I want you to embrace me.  The shame in your life is bringing us further apart.  It is your choice, you can choose shame or you can choose my embrace.  I pray you choose my embrace always.

Love Continually,

God

Love Letters from God

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank you so much for bringing your beauty to every part of my life-even the most shameful parts.  It comforts my heart incredibly that where shame once was in my life it is no longer found.  All that is there is your beauty!  I cannot believe you love me enough to wait patiently every moment of every day for me to hand over to you all that is keeping me from your loving embrace.  I have learned true love waits.  I have learned true love brings beauty to every detail and rejoices in imperfections.  Those imperfections are true examples of your PERFECTNESS!  I find in my imperfections more and more of your perfect beauty!

Please hold onto my heart and let me sway in the direction you want me to walk in every moment of every day-there I will find no shame or burdens, just YOU.  I thank you that I do not need to feel shame; I can choose to feel your love.  That is a choice I pray I have the strength to make every day over and over again.

Love,

Your Shameless Daughter all because of YOU

 



Questions for Reflection

1.        Do you carry around shame from past experiences or bad choices in your life?

2.       Believe that you are not intended to carry around shame, worries, anxieties, or burdens.  God has died for you to live a life free of burdens in HIM.  1 Peter 5:7 Cast all of your anxieties on GOD for HE cares for you.  Memorize this verse and practice giving God all of your anxieties-even if you have to do it multiple times a day!

3.       Spend some time talking with God today.  What does He want to tell you?  I pray you hear his still small voice.

With Love,

Diane

copyright_diane meyers

A Daughter’s Worth: Week 12 / Day 2 – Recognize the Holiness of God

 

It is very fitting that the final week of our study is coming to a close just before Christmas.  It could not be more perfect to recognize that God wants to “come alive” in our hearts and lives than at Christmas when we celebrate Jesus coming to live with us.  We began this study learning who we are to God and just how much HE loves us.  We continued the study to learn how we are to respond to HIM as Father.  It has truly been an awesome journey to realize what A DAUGHTER IS WORTH to God.  He gave His only Son for you.  Your life matters to HIM.  How will you show Him how much HE matters to you????  Words are cool and everything, but ACTIONS speak louder!!

How are you going to bring HIS love to LIFE inside of you?  God calls us to be different from the world.  He wants us to be holy, like he is holy.  Today’s lesson focuses on church and how we are to recognize God’s holiness.  I would like to challenge you to think outside the box (the church box) and apply God’s call to YOUR LIFE – how you live every day.  When people think of you, do they think “holy”?  Hmmmm

The only time many of us use the word ‘holy’ is when we need an adjective to make something seem important.  Like cows and moly and poo.  Well, “HOLY” is important. It means to show a devotion to God and to a life of virtue; to set apart or worthy of respect by association with God.  Holy means being completely WHOLE just like GOD.

“But now you must be holy in everything you do, just as God — who chose you to be his children — is holy.  For he himself has said, “You must be holy because I am holy.”

1 Peter 1:15-16

Peter says we have been chosen to be God’s children – HIS Daughters – and we are to be holy, LIKE HE is HOLY.  God is calling out this generation to bring HOLY back.  Don’t be afraid, BE BOLD.  Can there be any safer place to be than a chosen daughter of the King of KINGS?  When God makes a promise, HE DOESN’T BREAK IT!!  All those promises in the Bible; they are still good.  God is still providing for every promise He ever made.  All those promises in the Bible – they are YOURS.  Claim them, they are free.  Let those promises bring holy to life inside of your heart.

“For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart.”

Hebrews 4:12 ESV

God knows what is in your heart.  Do not be deceived to think that you can say one thing and act another and God will not know.  Give God permission to change your heart to be like HIS and He WILL.  It’s a promise.  You won’t regret living your life for Jesus, but you will regret it if you don’t.  This season of Christmas when we celebrate Jesus being born as a baby and coming to life a life as a human, embrace the story of His holiness.  Take it inside you and let it change your heart.  Let your heart break for the things that break HIS heart.

Let Love Come to LIFE Inside of YOU this Christmas!  As Ava tells us, “As a worthy daughter, being holy is both challenging and rewarding.  You may not be perfect every time, but working toward purity is all that God asks.  Don’t be frightened by a lifestyle of holiness; after all, the Holy Spirit is in you, making all things possible.  Praise God for His presence, and most of all, acknowledge His awesome holiness.” (p. 171)

Let’s Praise God together:

Father, we praise You for WHO You are.  We thank You for Your promises to care for us and lead us and guide us every day.  Father, we give You permission to bring our hearts to life inside us and make us burn to be Your hands and feet.  Make us holy like You are holy.  Make us whole and complete in Your love.  We love You, Lord.  Thank You for loving us so much that You sent Your Son to this earth as a baby to be a sacrifice for our sins.  May our generation be one that lives to love others the way You would have us to.  Continue to teach us your ways.   AMEN

My love to you all and Merry Christmas,

Mama T <3

If you have come to a place that your heart is telling you to ask Jesus into your life as Lord and Savior, please ASK HIM.  It’s easy, it’s free and it’s the best gift you could give Him for Christmas.  We invite you today to ask Him into your heart.

Please pray with us:

Lord Jesus, I come to You today and ask You to be my Lord and Savior. I have learned who You are through this bible study Lord, and I want to know You personally.  I admit that I am a sinner, I confess the sins that I have in my heart, and I believe You will forgive me for all my sins. I ask You now to come into my life, as my personal Lord and Savior. AMEN!

If you prayed that prayer today, let us know.  We would love to rejoice with you as you celebrate you BIRTHday as a sister in Christ.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf  
Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Please email GCH_Decaf@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information.

A Daughter’s Worth: Week 12 – Living with Optimism

This is our last week with “A Daughter’s Worth” bible study.  I hope you have enjoyed this study, as much as we have!  Sometimes online Bible studies can be kind of pressing, especially when you have such a busy schedule.  But, one thing that I have learned is that putting God first and foremost, in all things, is an absolute necessity in order for everything else in my life to run smoothly.

The Word tells us to seek Him first and all things will be added unto us.  That means first thing every day, we should be making time for God.  We should be seeking God in our daily schedules, tests, extra-curricular activities, church functions, sports, and more.  If God hasn’t called us to it, we cannot expect Him to bless it.

This week, in Week 12 of A Daughter’s Worth, we will discuss “Living with Optimism” and what that means.  This may be the end of this study, but it’s a very important part of this book!  I hope you will take the time to read it, meditate on what you’ve read, and spend time with God.

Here is your schedule for the week:  

On Monday, Diane will discuss giving honor to God.

On Tuesday, Teresa will discuss recognizing the holiness of God.

On Wednesday, Jordan will discuss receiving happiness from God.

On Thursday, Tonya will discuss resting in the hope of God.

On Friday, Edwina  will discuss looking forward to Heaven with God.

And then to close the week off, Coleen will have a special message for us.  So be sure to stay tuned!

Be sure to check back soon because we will be announcing what’s next for GCH:decaf SOON!!!

Now a word from Miss Morgan:

Hey girls this is our last week, which is crazy; but this week we will be talking about how we should give God glory and that we should know the holiness that God has. God also will give us happiness, which we should learn to accept, and to always have the Joy of the Lord with us.

Lastly we will also be talking about resting in the hope of the Lord, and that we should always look forward to Heaven and living with God forever. It’s weird thinking this life will end, but we will live FOREVER in Heaven with God, which is amazing. I love you girls!!



Before Morgan and I close for today, I want to ask you if you know Jesus as your personal Lord and Savior?  If not, we invite you today to ask Him into your heart.  Please pray with us:

Lord Jesus, I come to You today and ask You to be my Lord and Savior.  I have learned who You are through this bible study Lord, and I want to know You personally.  So today, Lord, I confess the sins that I have in my heart, and I ask You to forgive me and cleanse me of all unrighteousness.  I ask You now to come into my life, as my personal Lord and Savior.  AMEN!

If you prayed this prayer with Morgan and I, would you send us an email?  We’d like to pray with you.  You can reach us at GCH_decaf@girlfriendscoffeehour.com.  

We love you, so does He!

Have a GREAT week everyone!

Morgan & Christi

 

Lord, Teach Us to Pray – Week 12

Today we are finishing the series entitled Lord, teach us to pray!

Do you ever cry out with that same desire as Jesus’ disciples did — ”Teach {me} to pray”?

Each Saturday over the last few months, we have been intentionally pursuing asking the Lord to do just that—teach us to pray. I believe that, as we have looked at learning how to pray through the Scriptures, we have developed the heart of daughters who delight, yearn, love to pray to their Father!!!

Jesus was asked this important question by His disciples. One of the places that it is recorded is in Luke 11, verse 1: “Then He was praying in a certain place; and when He stopped, one of His disciples said to Him, Lord, teach us to pray….”

Listen to the words that He spoke to them when they asked:
Pray, therefore, like this:
Our Father
Who is in heaven,
hallowed (kept holy) be Your name.
Your kingdom come,
Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread.
And forgive us our debts,
as we also have forgiven (left, remitted, and let go of the debts,
and have given up resentment against) our debtors.
And lead (bring) us not into temptation,
but deliver us from the evil one
For Yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever.
Amen.
Matthew 6:9-13

The first week, in this series, we focused on the very first, and most important aspect, of Jesus’ instruction—addressing God Almighty as “Our Father….” We found that He wants to be our Father…our Abba Father!

The second week, we looked at the very next aspect of prayer that Jesus deemed of importance—“Who is in heaven.” This attribute tells of the utmost importance of God Who is in heaven. And we also were reminded of an awesome promise from God, that we will dwell for all eternity with Jesus and our Father, Who is in heaven.

Then we came to the third aspect, as we followed Jesus’ instruction,— “hallowed (kept holy) be Your name.” And we looked at five examples in the Scriptures where Almighty God is described as holy: we saw the Psalmist proclaim that ‘You are holy’…that the prophet Habakkuk called Him ‘my Holy One’…that Isaiah saw in a vision God seated on His throne with the seraphim proclaiming ‘holy, holy, holy’…that Jesus our Lord prayed ‘Holy Father’…that one of the seven angels praise Almighty God saying ‘You Who are and were ‘O Holy One.’ What a privilege that our Father…Who is in heaven…would allow us to come before Him and call Him ‘holy!’

After that we looked at the next aspect of prayer that Jesus deemed important—‘Your Kingdom come.’ We considered the question, “What is the Kingdom?” by focusing on just two ways to understand what Jesus meant. The first connotation that “Kingdom” has refers to the eternal Kingdom. And then to understand “Kingdom” in another way, we looked specifically at Matthew chapter 13 where Jesus spoke in parables and used tangible examples to help His disciples (and us!) to understand the importance of having the Kingdom established in our hearts. He wants you and me to be in that Kingdom along with Him.

Then the following week we focused on another aspect of Jesus’ instruction: ‘Your will be done.’ It is Almighty God’s will that we are to be concerned about…not our own. We considered scripture after scripture and saw our Lord’s constant example of desiring not His will but His Father’s. If it were ever possible for anyone to justifiably state and act on their own will, it would have been Jesus; true? Jesus always desired His Father’s will, always sought His Father’s will, always purposed to know His Father’s will so that He always did His Father’s will. And what did we find was His Father’s will?—salvation and redemption through Jesus Christ.

And the next week we studied the phrase ‘Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven’ from the perspective of our Lord’s life and ministry. We read that Jesus came down from heaven not to do His own will but to do the will of His Father on the earth. Jesus was always the perfect example to His disciples. He simply and clearly taught His disciples (and us!) to do always seek to do the same.

The following week we considered the phrase, “Give us this day our daily bread.” We recognized that Jesus IS the ‘bread of life.” We clearly saw Jesus’ heart of compassion, wanting His disciples (and us!) to live forever by partaking of the Bread of Life. We also looked at Jesus’ instruction that if they would pray, “give us this day our daily bread…” they would be humbly acknowledging that their heavenly Father already KNEW what their needs would be that day.

Then we focused on the next direction Jesus gave as He taught His disciples (and us!) to pray. It is the request to “…forgive us our debts.” We looked first at the record where Peter asked Jesus how many times did he need to forgive? Jesus answered him, ‘I tell you, not up to seven times, but seventy times seven!” Nothing has changed. We, too, are to forgive “…seventy times seven…” (In other words, just keep on forgiving!) Then Jesus gave further clarification and direction to Peter and the other disciples. He held nothing back in communicating that forgiveness, or the refusal to forgive, is an issue of the heart. God through Christ has forgiven us for SO much! And He compassionately, mercifully, and lovingly, continues to forgive us as we repent and ask.

We looked next at His direction to His disciples (and us!) to ask our Father to “lead us not into temptation…” Of great importance is to remember that God does not “tempt” anyone (James 1:13, 14). And in Matthew 4:3 we clearly saw that THE tempter is satan, our enemy. We are not alone in handling temptation. He understands and has shown us how to handle satan’s tempting. We saw Jesus’ great example in Matthew 4:1-11. His response—the very thing that kept Him from being tempted—was the truth of the Scriptures. Jesus replied to satan each time with “…it is written….” We, too, can have the assurance of the truth of the Scriptures when our enemy tries to tempt us.

And then we focused on the final instruction Jesus gave to His disciples (and us!) as He taught them how to pray–“And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.” These two phrases are to be understood together in their context. Jesus clearly stated that not only did they need to recognize temptation but also recognize that they could not ‘handle’ it on their own—they needed to pray for God’s deliverance. One portion of Jesus’ prayer (in John 17) includes asking God “keep and protect them from the evil one,” and also Jesus praying for “…all those who will ever come to believe in (trust in, cling to, rely on) Me.” THAT IS US! You and me…mentioned in Jesus’ precious prayer to God! Our reliance on our heavenly Father and our Lord Jesus (seated at His right hand) gives us the ability, the strength to be delivered from evil.

Now, the phrase we studied last week was ‘for Yours is the Kingdom, and the power, and the glory forever.’ In Jesus’ teaching His disciples (and us!) to pray, He began and ended with praise. Praising God should be a part of all of our communication with our heavenly Father but especially in our prayers. Jesus made sure that His disciples (and us!) knew that God was to be glorified and praised! His final point to them (and us!) when they asked Him to teach them to pray was the importance of praising and glorifying God.

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And, finally, we come to Jesus’ very last word as He taught His disciples (and us!) to pray—“amen.’ In the Hebrew language, ‘amen’ simply is an affirmation, a recognition of truth, “so be it.’

I read a quote that impacted me greatly, and I would like to share it with you.  “The word “amen” is a most remarkable word. It was transliterated directly from the Hebrew into the Greek of the New Testament, then into Latin and into English and many other languages, so that it is practically a universal word. It has been called the best known word in human speech. The word is directly related—in fact, almost identical— to the Hebrew word for “believe”  (amam), or faithful.  Thus, it came to mean “sure” or “truly,” an expression of absolute trust and confidence.”*

But equally important, I think, is to put yourself in the sandals of the disciples. Think about it for a moment…. Here they are with their Master. Throughout the months that they have spent with Him, they have seen Him pray all along. And finally, one of them blurts out, “Lord, teach us to pray!” And so, as we have seen, He takes them step-by-step through a series of instructions; helping them to have the right heart attitude towards God when they pray.

That, truly, is what this instruction of our Lord’s is all about—having the right heart…not the perfect words…not a ‘method’ of praying. But rather to approach our Father God with humility and to…

Acknowledge that He is our Father,
and that He dwells in heaven,
and that He IS Holy, Holy, Holy.
Recognize that His Kingdom will come
and that His Will will be done on earth
just as it is in heaven.
Ask for our daily bread, every day.
Deal with forgiveness,
and to give up resentment against others.
Acknowledge where temptation truly comes from,
and our need to be delivered from the evil one.
Praise Him…giving Him the honor and the glory forever!

Jesus had so much compassion towards His disciples (and us!), knowing of their need to be led in such a way that they then could pray after He left them and returned to His Father in heaven. His instruction gave them (and us!) the ability to pray on their own.

Oh. How. He. Loves. Us. So. <3
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In our study A Daughter’s Worth, we have focused this week on being ready to hear God’s voice..being sensitive to leading of the holy spirit…being prepared to wait on God…being willing to accept His answer…being confident in Who God is and His perfect provision for us. Perhaps could we say that we have been working on preparing our hearts to say ‘amen.’ Or ‘so be it!’

This week instead of a question, I believe we can confidently make the statement, ‘I, ______, (insert your precious name here) am a daughter of the Most High God, and to Him I am of SUCH worth!

 “Amen!”

* I found this quote in a number of sources (the Online Bible, Bible.org, etc.) and have quoted from the ‘The Blue Letter Bible.org;’ source unknown.



If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Please email GCH_Decaf@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information.

A Daughter’s Worth: Week 11 – Day 2: Be Sensitive to the Holy Spirit

 

I have a story to tell you and it’s not pretty.  It’s one of those stories that you really wish had never happened and you never had to own up to.  But the truth is, it did happen and it is part of my history.  Kind of like a Series of Unfortunate Events, only I was a main character and I made decisions that I knew I shouldn’t have and I paid the price for my actions.   I have to tell you so you will see how the Holy Spirit works in our lives if we let Him.

First of all, to have the Holy Spirit in your life you have to have given your life to follow Jesus.  That is #1.  Getting to know Jesus and what He expects from us is #2.  Learning to walk the walk and talk the talk is #3.  Making a mess of life and making changes to bad behavior and habits is part of #3.  Deciding that God’s way is best and that He wants what is best for me, that’s #4.  Today’s story comes in at #3 and I’ll tell you about how I learned about #4.

I have to tell you that I am a very stubborn and strong-willed person.  Sometimes that works in my favor, sometimes it gets me into trouble.  Finding that balance is where the Holy Spirit comes in.  I was raised in church and was drawn by the Holy Spirit to give my life to Jesus when I was 11.  Boy was that a hard admission to make when you are stubborn and head strong…and shy.  I knew I needed Jesus and I knew He wanted me.  I was afraid to admit it publicly because people would look at me.  My God did not give up on me and He continued to tell me to come to Him.  Finally at summer camp, during cabin quiet time, I gave my heart to Jesus.  No tears, no hysterics, no party…just obedience to the prompting of the Holy Spirit.  Peace entered my heart and calmed the inside of me.  That was pretty cool, then I had to tell my mom, and my pastor, and my church.  It’s biblical you know.  Romans 10:9 says, “If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”  So after I told my church, I got baptized…in the river, the Tennessee River, just like the old songs and the movies show it.

Man, I was on fire…on the inside.  Still shy, you know.  I dug in to the Bible even more than I had before.  My favorite verse was, and still is Proverbs 3:5-6, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;  6 in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.  At 12, I felt God (through the Holy Spirit) tell me of the plans He had for my life.  I asked Him questions and He answered me.  I have held those words in my heart all these years.  They are just as real today as they were when I was 12.  I am now living those plans that God revealed to me when I was young.  Never could I have known what my life would look like, or who I would marry, or how many kids I would have, or that I would be leading an online Bible study.  I had to trust that if I gave my life to Jesus, He would take care of the details.

So HERE is where I MESSED up and had a NO good, DIRTY, rotten, Horrible DAY for about a year.  :-/  I was in church, in school and everybody had boyfriends.  I felt left out and really wanted a boyfriend soooo bad.  I prayed for a boyfriend, ANY boyfriend to make me feel special and show the world that somebody wanted me.  I was getting attention from some boys, but none that I really liked or thought would be a good choice.  I got really tired of waiting for the person God was preparing for me and decided to take a risk on a “bad boy”.  Well, in my defense, he was the pastor’s son, he rode my school bus and he was kinda cute.  He also cussed, smoked pot on said school bus and didn’t do his homework.  He and his buddies got into all kinds of trouble, but he liked ME.  HMMMMM, what’s a good girl to do?

So back to #3.  I got distracted from walking the walk, because the talk I was talking was not good.  I let this relationship with the boy distract me from the plan God had for me.  I got in trouble at school.  I lost some friends.  I got two In-School suspensions and one 3-day unpaid vacation that my parents were not thrilled about.  (sarcasm here)  I’m surprised they let me live.  It was a close call in my house for a while.  My sophomore year of high school is one I wish I could get a do-over, or take a HUGE eraser to and wipe it from my history.  I can’t erase it, because it brought me to #4, “Deciding that God’s way is best and that He wants what is best for me”.  I had to learn the hard way and some of you do too.  Maybe I went through that way back then so I could share it with you today.  DON’T DO WHAT I DID!

Ava tells us in today’s lesson, “When you focus on God, the Holy Spirit goes to work.”  Try really hard to get your heart focused on God.  Push out the distractions and listen for the Holy Spirit to speak to you.  Just because I messed up at 14, I didn’t erase God’s plan that He gave me when I was 12.  He didn’t throw me away because I made a bad decision, or several bad decisions.  He loved me and drew me back to Himself and taught me to walk the walk.  I’d like to say that was the only mistake I made in my life, but it’s not.  It is however, one that I was embarrassed to talk about for a long time.  Now it is part of my love story with Jesus.

LET’S PRAY: 

Heavenly Father, Thank you for loving us enough to let us make our mistakes, correct our path and give us a job that brings glory to YOU.  Forgive us when we mess up.  You know we are going to mess up and need you to come to our rescue.  Thank you for picking up the pieces of our heart and putting it back together.  We love you, Father and want to bring you all of us to use any way you want.        AMEN

Much Love,

Mama T <3

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If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Please email GCH_Decaf@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information.

A Daughter’s Worth: Week 10 / Day 2 – Keep Your Life Clean

 

I talked to my girls about some of the names girls get called when they try to live out their life for God.  I added a few ‘old school’ words I heard when I was in school, too.  Things haven’t changed so much.  See if these look familiar:

Teacher’s Pet                                       Party Pooper                                        Weak

Goodie 2 Shoes                                   Kill Joy                                                  Stuck Up

Know It All                                           Buzz Kill                                                Goody Goody

Nerd                                                      Lame                                                  Add Yours Here

When people think about you, what kind of words come to mind?  I look over this list of words meant to hurt and cause peer pressure.  They say these words to make themselves feel okay about the way they are choosing to live their lives, not so much about the way a “good girl” lives hers.  So look back over that list again.  Is there really anything bad on that list?  Is there anything there that would cause God to be ashamed of your behavior?  Can you bring glory to God as you live your life…even if people call you names like that?   I know you have heard the words that “Bad Girls” get called.  Think about that list.  Is God glorified if you are living a “bad girl” kind of lifestyle?

At this point in our study, we have learned what God expects of us as a Daughter of the King.  We know how to bring our earthly parents joy and we know how to make our Heavenly Father happy.  It’s time to live out our faith in God.  There may still be some bad habits we have, or some areas in our lives we need to turn away from.  Look how easy it is to change:

Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.  Psalms 51:10

When your heart is clean, your thoughts will change, your actions will change, people will notice.  In today’s lesson of A Daughter’s Worth, Ava Sturgeon says, “After accepting Christ, you begin to desire the clean heart that He provides. “  Then Ava encourages us:  “Sharing Christ is so much easier when you become a living testimony.” 

For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks.  Luke 6:45b

Live YOUR Faith.  It’s impossible to give away something you don’t have.  Make sure the people in your life can see the change Jesus has made.  You won’t be perfect, but you will be forgiven and can begin each day fresh and new.  Show love, kindness, compassion and generosity.  There will be a different list of words people will say about you.  Words that truly do bring glory to God, the Father and words that you WILL NOT be embarrassed by.

Before we go, I want to remind you of ways to Keep Your Life Clean:

Put God first. This means making the commitment to seek God.

Finding ways to be a blessing. “Being a Blessing” means taking the focus off yourself and placing it onto someone else.

Acting right on purpose. This means treating people with kindness, respect, and patience, even those that are hard to love.  Right behavior is Christianity in action.

Let’s Pray:

Heavenly Father,  We want to bring glory to You.  We want others to see Your life shining through us.  Create in us a clean heart.  Give us the desire to remove those bad habits from our lives and live for You.  Help us to treat others with kindness, respect and patience.  Help us as we walk out our faith, especially on the hard days.  We love You Lord.  AMEN

Be A Blessing,

Mama T <3

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For the A Daughter’s Worth Online Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button located at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH: decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Please email GCH_Decaf@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information.

A Daughter’s Worth Week: 10 / Day 1 – Have a Story to Tell

When I was younger I was never certain I was going to Heaven.  I asked Jesus into my heart when I was five, but I could not say without a shadow of doubt that I would go to Heaven one day.  I was not ready for what that simple prayer I prayed at the wee age of five would do for me.  Though, I soon found out what I was not doing for that prayer.  There were days I would pray that prayer over and over, worrying that I said it wrong or didn’t mean it and had to keep saying it to make sure that there was no chance I was missing out on Heaven.  I spent a decent amount of time praying that God would save me, but from what I was not sure, and from where I was praying-no clue, all I was sure of was it was not coming from the sincerity of my heart.

Today, I can confidently say that I belong to God, and that I will be in Heaven one day.  It took me a long time to believe those words in my heart.  What about you?  Do you believe that you will be in Heaven one day?  Do you belong to God’s family?  If there is even a hint of doubt in your answer to those questions will you please reach out to a leader or pastor!  I cannot begin to explain to you the importance of praying with your heart the prayer of Salvation.  Simply believing that God sent HIS ONLY Son to DIE on a CROSS for YOU AND ME and then ROSE from the DEAD three days later; asking for forgiveness of your many sins and accepting JESUS into your HEART to help guide you and follow HIM, will not only guarantee your entrance to the gates of Heaven one day BUT it is also the start of the perfect story you have with the GOD of the UNIVERSE!

Have you ever thought about your story?  God already has a beautiful story written for you and Him to share together.  In this story you will grow closer to Him, learning to depend on Him for all of your needs.  Everyone’s story is different.  Everyone’s story has potential.  We are the ones that have to choose to embrace the pages of our stories.  It is not enough to just sit back and watch the pages turn.  We must act out on what we feel in our hearts.  We were told to read Acts 22:15-16 today.  Let’s take a look at it.

You will be his witness to all people of what you have seen and heard.  And now what are you waiting for? Get up, be baptized and wash your sins away, calling on his name.

Do not get discouraged if you have not seen or heard from God lately or ever!  It is never too late to change your path and go another way…leading to Jesus.  The more time you spend with Him in prayer, reading the Bible, getting involved in church, etc. the more you will see Him and hear His gentle whispers in your life.  This life is short.  Those of us who know Jesus and call on His name, we are all saved by the blood of Jesus.  We will all get to live the life we were intended for in Heaven with Jesus one day!  Until then, we MUST flee sin and run into the Lord’s arms!  We must take advantage of this life as short as it is and use it as an opportunity to share our stories with others.

I know for certain God did not save me from a life of complete misery just to leave my story on a pretty shelf.  He saved me so that I may share my story; being a light to others and helping others find Jesus as they hear each chapter.  Today, I leave you with a piece of my story; I pray that you share pieces of yours in our discussion group!  One thing I know is that when we let God into our hearts, he transforms our stories into something amazingly beautiful!  I cannot wait to hear what God has done and will do in each and every one of your lives!

Little Tid-Bit of my Love Story with God

I am so thankful that I asked the Lord into my heart when I was 5.  Even though I was not certain what that meant, the Lord heard my words and he never ever left my heart especially when I turned from Him.  When I turned from Him it was the worst time in my life.  One night after too much heartbreak, I cried out to Him and asked Him to help me.  I was not expecting anything but to my surprise, God heard my cry, and helped me.  He protected me and saved me from a life of misery.  He is faithful!  I rededicated my life to the Lord. He is the love story I was always searching for.  I always thought I needed a man, but they all left me feeling empty inside.  When I embraced God, I found His love that fills every possible crevice in my heart and overflows into the lives of so many others that need so desperately to find HIS love.

*****

Let’s Pray:  Dear Heavenly Father, thank You honestly does not seem like enough to show the gratitude I have in my heart for what You alone have done for each and every one of us.  I ask that any girl who is reading this post and does not know You as her personal Savior, will find You and start embracing Your story for herself.  I ask that each one of these girls feels confident in the salvation You have given them, freely.  I pray that these girls truly live out the story You have prepared for them.  Bring opportunities into their precious lives to share their stories with others.  We love You Lord, oh so much and we cannot wait to see You in Heaven one day!!  Amen.

Love to my dear sisters in Christ,

Diane

For the A Daughter’s Worth Online Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Please email GCH_Decaf@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information.

A Daughter’s Worth: Week 8 / Day 3 – You Can Go Too Far

I don’t think I could even begin to count how many times I have heard the question, “How far is too far?” And if I never have to hear that question again, it’ll be too soon. With that being said, that question has come out of my mouth. I have such a problem with this question because it is basically asking how much we can get away with. And how many times have we asked or heard someone say, “…well, the Bible only says that sex itself is wrong before marriage… It doesn’t say anything about the other stuff.” WRONG-O. Ephesians 5:3 says that the Lord wants there to be “not even a HINT of sexual immorality” in our lives.

I will be the first to admit that I did not value or protect my purity when I was in my teens. Did I have sex? No. Did I make allowances for the “other stuff”? Yes. I am being honest with you girls because I do not want you to be deceived like I was! I do not want you to think, “Well, it isn’t sex so it’s okay.” This is SO not true! It is NOT okay. Here’s why… When you start to bring the physical stuff into a relationship outside of marriage it BLINDS you and prevents you from seeing the reality of your relationship. That means that you can’t even tell if you really even like this guy! Another reason it’s not okay- The world tells you that only sex forms an attachment to a man. I can tell you first hand, that is false. You also, at some point, deal with shame and guilt.

If you’re like me and have had that “How did I get here?” moment, you know how disappointed you were. Disappointed in the boy for not stepping up and protecting your purity, but more often than not, you’re disappointed in yourself. The enemy LOVES when we have messed up and are grieving over our sin. He loves to come in and make us feel so much worse. Conviction and guilt are NOT the same thing. Conviction is from the Lord. When you are convicted about sexual purity, you know that God’s Word says to stay away from sexual immorality. And if you have taken part in sexual activity, you can repent, turn away from that sin, and run to the Lord. Guilt, on the other hand, makes you hyper-aware of your sin. You sit and you wallow in self-hatred for hours on end. And forgiving yourself? Ha! Yeah right. That never happens when we allow the enemy to make us feel guilty.

So where do we go from here if we have messed up? Or how do we prevent that from ever happening? We trust that God knows what’s best for us. He knows that it is not good for our hearts for us to take part in sexual activity outside of marriage. He knows that it will only end in heartbreak. If you’re currently having sex outside of marriage, please, please, please stop. Your Father in Heaven is not One to make rules to make us miserable. The guidelines He puts in place are to protect us, because He loves us, and He wants our future marriages to be AMAZING!! Girls, you HAVE to be intentional about setting boundaries in your dating relationships. Here are my new boundaries~ I am not going to kiss another guy until the day of my wedding. I can hear your gasps all the way from over here. I just know that I do not want the enemy to have ANY stronghold over my life, and I am not about to give him any opportunity. Set your boundaries TODAY, BEFORE you get in a relationship. Write them down. Tell them to the Lord. Tell them to a friend to hold you accountable. If a boy is pressuring you to do anything physical, I HIGHLY encourage you to get out of that relationship. You deserve to date guys who HONOR your boundaries and who have made decisions and set boundaries themselves.

Let’s pray~

Lord, Thank You for setting boundaries for us! We know that those boundaries are to protect us from heartbreak. Lord, set girls FREE who are reading this- free from sexual sin, free from the lies of the enemy! Give these girls the strength to make boundaries and stick to them. Give them armor around their hearts, that they would be guarded from any deception. Thank You for Your grace when we mess up. Thank You for freedom from sin! We praise You, Lord, for the GIFT of sex… A precious thing that is a gift if kept within the context of marriage. Give us discernment to know what is right and wrong, and give us discernment to know WHO is right and wrong for us. In Jesus’ name, Amen!

~Jordan

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For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information