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A Daughter’s Worth: Week 9 / Day 2 – Extracurricular Activities are Stressful

November 27, 2012 by

 

Extracurricular Activities are Stressful

When I was younger, much younger, I had BIG dreams.  I felt that God had BIG PLANS for my life…but I was stuck.  At least I felt stuck.  I began seeking God and His plans for me when I was about 12 years old and continued to watch for Him through my teens.  It wasn’t always easy to stay on the straight path and sometimes I strayed.  Having too many extracurricular activities was not a problem where I grew up.  There was nothing, and I mean NOTHING, to do.  Boredom can steal your focus from God just as much as being too busy can.  As I began parenting my girls, I wanted them to experience all that God’s world had to offer.  I wanted them to be able to try things and see where their passions would lie.  I wanted them to grow up with few regrets of things that might have been.

We tried various sports, dance, clubs, groups, camps and mission trips.  We went on field trips, read books and traveled.  Hopefully the girls were able to experience things in their lives that would point them to their God-given passions and abilities.  I encouraged the girls to try everything at least once and the things they liked…DO IT AGAIN.

When middle school came I asked the girls to do everything they had any interest in, but by high school they had to pick one interest.  My daughter Michele tried basketball, clubs, band and peer tutoring.  Lindsay didn’t really have any interests in and around school, she wanted to dance ballet.  Robin is sports-gifted so she tried tennis, basketball, cross-country, soccer, a little bit of golf and band.  By the time high school came around, Michele had dropped band and sports, but kept her grades high and found that she loved to help kids learn.  Lindsay still didn’t like the organization of school much, but loved her ballet classes.  Now she is enjoying being able to choose her college classes on her schedule much better than high school.  Robin chose to play soccer, keep her grades high and volunteer her time at church.

These are only three daughters from the same family with the same values seeking to find their place in God’s family.  It gets crazy at our house trying to balance everyone’s schedule, but the most important thing is to keep God FIRST and all the other STUFF falls into place.  Our family MOTTO is “You have time for what you make time for”.  If God says, “Where’s MY time?” the answer better not be “I didn’t have time”.  He gave up something pretty important for you, so you should be willing to give up a little something for HIM.

There is a famous quote from George Bernard Shaw: “Youth is Wasted On the Young”.  I think it is famous because all of us old people wish we had YOUR energy and potential with OUR wisdom and we would have made better choices when we had the chance.  In the Bible…in Ecclesiates, King Solomon says that it is good to be young and enjoy life.  Solomon lived life to the fullest.  He tried everything under the sun and you know what he found out???  It’s all meaningless unless GOD is there.

Take every opportunity to try new things and meet new people.  Put God first and let him light the way to those new things.  You will NEVER regret one minute following God.  You WILL regret leaving him out.  I promise.  Don’t waste your youth being stupid.  Your life is a GIFT, give it back to God and see what He wants to make of it.

What you ARE is God’s gift to you.  What you make of it is your gift to God.

Let’s PRAY:

Dear Father, Thank you for the gift of this life and the opportunities in it.  Thank you for giving us individual passions and desires that aren’t like anyone else’s.  Help us to find our place in your BIG family.  Help us find balance when life seems overwhelming, stressful and gets us down.  We know you love us and forgive us when we fail.  Help us to forgive ourselves and move even closer to you.  We love you.  Be patient with us as we learn to show you how much we love you with our actions.    AMEN

Be Blessed,

Mama T  <3

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For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information

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Winning Him Without Words: Keep Your Armor On -You’re at War

November 26, 2012 by

When we get up from our bed each morning we are entering a battlefield…many times we have not even had a chance to have our devotion with the Lord or even get a cup of coffee when the battles of our day begins…..

Here is where some of our tug of wars start:

  • Getting breakfast
  • Fixing lunches
  • Doing some laundry/cleaning
  • Getting kids to school
  • Going to work
  • Fixing dinner
  • Getting kids to sports practices
  • Making sure homework is completed
  • Getting everyone showers
  • And on and on and on……

And this list is only a beginning of the tug on our lives and as you notice from our list above, we still didn’t spend any time with God yet.

By the end of our day our brains feel like a battlefield and our hearts have the holes to show the direct hits we’ve taken thru each tug. We sit and ask ourselves “how much longer can I continue and what would happen if I just stopped?”

This happened to me one evening when I fixed dinner and set the table and called my family to come eat.  They all sat down and said to me “awwh I didn’t want to have this tonite, could you not have fixed so and so..they continued for many minutes having something negative to say about the fact that I didn’t fix what “they wanted”.  They had no compassion of the fact that my day was a war zone and that everything that I had encountered was a continuous battle from one moment to the next and yet all they could think about were their wants……so you may be asking “what did you do”.

Well I did what any sweet wife and mother would do in this situation (no it was not fix them another dinner)…..I took every one of their plates and raked it all in the trash can and told them they could all find something to eat on their own and then I took my plate into my room and had dinner alone.

Yes I was having as Dineen called it “the briefest of a pity party”—and so I retreated into my room so I could find shelter to help guide me through what I had just done.  I needed to put on some armor & restore my strength.

In our scripture for today’s lesson Eph. 6:12-17 it explains two parts that we battle in our lives.  Verse 12 talks about what or whom we battle and verses 13-17 tells us about the standing part.

We are on the front lines of battle every morning, and if we get up and let God be the commander and direct the battles, direct our lives, direct everything, then at least when we put on the armor God provides us we are going into the daily battles with strength—we won’t be walking into these daily battles blindly but instead we will be prepared for what will come, and we will be able to hear Him tell us when to strike and when to fall back.

God will be the one to get us through the daily battles and get us through them alive.

Do we want to walk blindly through our battles, letting Satan tear us down, and try destroying our testimony or do we want to put on our armor and do what these verses tell us to do “to stand”.

There will be battles in our marriages that will be coming that we won’t be able to see ahead of time but when they hit, when the interruptions abound, that is when we must, right then, put on the armor and take a stand.

You may be very weak:                                           STAND

You may get weary:                                                 STAND

You may feel fear:                                                    STAND

The roar of battle may be deafening:                    STAND

The devil may remind you of past defeats:            STAND

You may see others fall:                                           STAND

Confusion and chaos may be all around you:      STAND

Everything may seem to be against you:              STAND

You may feel all alone:                                            STAND

You may feel your marriage slipping away:          STAND

 We are strong in the Lord, and in the power of HIS might!   So Stand ladies Stand!

 If you are in a mismatched marriage, there is a soul at stake, so wake up each morning, prepare your heart, put on your armor and stand ready and prepared to help lead your man to the commander by your example.

Let’s Pray:   God I pray for each lady that she would arise every morning and prepare herself with armor on and ready to meet with you on the front lines in our marriages, and allow You to restore us with Your strength in the battles we may face today. In Your name I pray.    Amen!

Your assignment:  Have you recognized any attacks from the enemy in your marriages lately, if so please share with us how you took a “stand” against the enemy and stood strong instead, or if you have learned something new God has shown you from studying today’s lesson that will be of help in future attacks share that with us.

Blessings to you all this week,

Beverly

For the “Winning Him Without Words” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

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Special Post – Thanksgiving Traditions Part 2

November 23, 2012 by

Today we are continuing the second in a two-part feature. Girlfriends Coffee Hour leaders and members have shared some of their Thanksgiving traditions for us! Do you have a special tradition for Thanksgiving? Leave a comment and tell us about it! We would love to hear what it is! If not, maybe the stories shared below will spark some ideas for new traditions in your home!

Have a blessed Day-After Thanksgiving Day!
Jennifer

***

Liz – For Thanksgiving – I have a thankful jar that sits on the living room table year round. All year, we add things to the jar that we are thanksful for and on Thanksgiving we pull out the pieces of paper and read them . When we are done, ( a few weeks later) I paste them all into a yearly thankful journal, so I will be able to keep the kids thoughts, thankfulness and handwriting forever.

For Christmas – I wrap 25 Christian themed Christmas books the week after Thanksgiving and put them under a special Book Tree in the kids room. Just a small Christmas tree in their room that they decorate every year with handmade ornaments. Every night of Advent, before bed, we unwrap a book and read it together. It reminds them of the reason we celebrate Christmas and we get some quality time each night to spend together. On Christmas Eve , we read the Christmas Story together as a family.

***

Sarah – We always buy our Christmas tree the day after Thanksgiving. We go as an entire family, aunts, uncles, grandmas & grandpas. It’s a lot of fun!!

***

Laurie – On Thanksgiving evening, my boys and go for a walk, start the Christmas music, break out the hot cocoa and put up our decorations. Then we light candles, turn out all the lights, lay under the tree and tell what our Christmas list is. <3<3 love that time with my family!!

***

Teresa: Since we have had so many girls living with us, we make a menu together, invite friends who do not have a place to go on Thanksgiving and make dishes in shifts together. Last year was good, here at home, but my mom and brothers were 3 hours away without us.

Can’t please everyone all the time. We do talk about the things that have changed in the past year, what we are thankful for and what we have learned. Our family is always in a state of change.

We stress the importance of being “ever thankful”, not just on Thanksgiving Day. It has helped us survive some pretty rocky times the last few years.

***

Shandy – Watching the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade and having a big dinner with the whole family prepared by my mom!

***

Jennifer B. – My sister made me a “thankful” book 3 years ago. (she is into scrapbooking and it is beautiful) Everyone at our house on Thanksgiving wrote on a page stating what they were thankful for, even great-grandma on my husbands side! I love to read thru the book to read everyone’s blessings…..btw, our family has grown by four, soon-to-be 5 children since then so I cannot wait to read this years blessings of thanks from everyone…..how precious it will be to have for my grandchildren, great grand children etc. A great family keepsake! 🙂

***

Donna – Our Thanksgiving tradition is two fold. First in order to enjoy the meal we start at the head of the table, take our time and go around the whole table, ( there are usually around 20 or more of us!) and say what we have been thankful for that year. Then after the meal is over and cleaned up we play a game of some sort with everyone who is there. One of us shops for a new game every year and bring it to play. It’s lots of fun and helps us all interact together! Just what Thanksgiving is all about!!

***

Colleen –

Events: We have an open house *usually on thanksgiving night but occasionally moved to friday evening*. It is our ‘praise and prayer and pie’ event! Very casual. sometimes we just have a few folks; once we had over 20—that was SO nice! Love just sitting around singing praise songs and some hymns; My husband, Robert, plays his guitar.

Food:
Robert and i always brine the turkey together…it is quite a process but i like that we do it together. (he must, too, ’cause he already asked me if i need the giant stockpot down yet 😉;-) no, dear, not yet!)

Frou-frou:
I start putting up the fall/thanksgiving decorations in early October! When Robert brings the storage totes (yes, there are 3 of them!) up from the basement, I get so excited! There’s always a couple of things that I don’t remember we have; such fun! And, of course, the little mementos that our grandchildren have made. Last year and this year, we made a paper chain that we just keep adding onto…you have strips of paper (like construction paper), and you write a praise or something you are thankful for, etc.; and then just keep adding on to the end. We always ask those who join us for thanksgiving dinner AND the praise & prayer time to add onto it, too.

***

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A Daughter’s Worth: Week 8 / Day 4 – You Can Handle a Difficult Break Up

November 22, 2012 by

I can remember when I was in Middle and High school… I never really dated until I officially got into high school. My dad was not really big on his daughters dating too much into our younger years in school. It was all girls in my family, so my dad tended to be a little sterner with us. He always said that he was a boy once, and he knew how they thought :). It did make it a little difficult for my sisters and me although, I will have to admit that yes, my dad was right: he knew how they thought.

As teenagers we all seem to think that our parents don’t know what they are talking about, we are quick to think that they are trying to make our lives difficult and hard, when all they are really trying to do is make it easier for us. They don’t want to see us hurt. They want to see us happy at all cost. Nine times out of ten, they have experienced heartbreak before and they desire to keep us from having to go through that type of pain.

Let me get to my story. I was in the 11th grade and I can remember my first real boyfriend. I was so in love with him. There was nothing that my wonderful dad could have done to help prevent that heartbreak from happening, although I am sure that he knew it was coming, because I was so head over hills for this guy. He was the perfect gentleman. We had dates to the movies, out to eat, long talks on the phone, good face to face conversations, etc… Then one day, he decided that he no longer wanted to date me. I was so heartbroken. I tried to figure out what I had done wrong, was it something that I had said, or did or didn’t do? It didn’t seem to matter because he just didn’t want to date me anymore. I was HEARTBROKEN!

My dad tried to comfort me, but it just didn’t seem to work. Honestly girls, I had to let God work His wonderful healing powers. I had to lean on Him to heal and mend my broken heart completely. Do I still feel that hurt sometimes? Yes I do, but I also remember how God sent people my way, who loved me dearly to help me work through that painful process. There were loved ones who baked me cookies, friends who sat and listened to me talk and held me when I cried. I can look back over that time and see how much God loved me that He desired to see me whole again. It was hard girls, it really was, but God got me through that painful process and He will do the same for you!!

There are two certain scriptures that are dear to my heart that show me that God is so concerned about us when our hearts are broken.

The Lord is near to the broken hearted and saves the crushed in spirit.

Psalms 34:18

AND

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.

Psalms 147: 3

God never wants to see His children hurt and heartbroken. He definitely KNOWS how it feels, just think about how He felt when He had to watch His only begotten son on the cross, bearing all of our sins and He couldn’t help Him because that was the decision that His son made, just for us, so that we could all be united with Him again. He also had His heart broken when Adam and Eve sinned for the first time by taking a bite out of the fruit when they were told not to. Wow! Yes He does know how it feels to have your heart broken!

So when you are experiencing heartbreak, yes you can go to God! He knows what it feels like. Take your broken hearts to Him, because He KNOWS exactly how to heal and mend them back together again 🙂

Let’s Pray: Dear heavenly Father please help us to remember that we can bring our broken hearts to you because you do know how to fix them. When the pain may feel like it is unbearable, please take that pain and help us to use it for good. Remind us that you love us so much that you don’t want to see us in pain and that you want us to be happy. We love you Lord and it is in your darling son’s Jesus Christ name we pray. Amen

Love Tonya 🙂

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For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information

 

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Special Post – Thanksgiving Traditions from GCH Members

November 22, 2012 by

We have a very special feature today and tomorrow. Girlfriends Coffee Hour leaders and members have shared some of their Thanksgiving traditions for us! So, enjoy this special two-part feature. Do you have a special tradition for Thanksgiving? Leave a comment and tell us about it! We would love to hear what it is! If not, maybe the stories shared below will spark some ideas for new traditions in your home!

Have a blessed Thanksgiving Day!
Jennifer

***

Michelle – One of the things I look forward to every Thanksgiving is my grandfather’s stuffing. He made it every year until he passed away, then my mom started making it, and when she passed away I started making it. Sooo yummy!

***

Amy – I hadn’t thought much about any traditions until my husband and I got together 10 yrs ago. Our first holiday together brought a bit fussing between us because we both enjoyed cooking and kept pushing each other out of the way LOL

So we’ve since learned that he does the stuffings (one cooked inside turkey, one cooked in another pan), and the turkey. I do the side dishes & desserts. He grew up with egg noodles AND mashed potatoes (served together with gravy), while I would have just potatoes. So I’ve made sure to keep that combination going for him.

Another fun tradition that my mom started was a movie with the grandkids. After the big dinner, she will take the kids to an afternoon movie while my husband and I put away the left overs, read the paper, and relax after a busy morning of cooking. It’s been a great activity for the kids & grandma over the years.

***

Tonya – The family tradition that we have started since my divorce my sister and my oldest son cooking the turkey together every year. The rest of us cook the other side dishes together and the ham. We sit down together as a family, when dinner is ready and before we eat, we go around the table saying what we are THANKFUL for and then we pray and eat. After we all eat and clear the table and we have let our food digest, we begin putting the Christmas tree up together 🙂:-)

***

Shauna – my thanksgiving holiday tradition is making my dad’s recipe for turkey gravy. Even when I was single I would make a turkey just so I could make the gravy. Felt like he was there, even though both my parents have been gone for many years now. It’s not thanksgiving without the gravy!!

***

Beverly – Here are some of our traditions over the years
1. Everyone gets the opportunity to speak what they have been the most thankful for since last Thanksgiving
2. Put our Christmas tree up on Thanksgiving evening
3. After thanksgiving dinner, all the girls look at all the ads and plan our Black Friday shopping spree…meet very early about 4:00 a.m. Fri for some grits, eggs and coffee then Stand in line for the freebies at the early bird stores…
4. This year we are going to do something new we are going to have a gingerbread house building contest. Every one in the family must participate from youngest to oldest, we will draw names for teams and there will be a prize for the winners…

***

Anne – I give each person a blank card to write what they are Thankful for and we put them in a basket & read them. Them we save them in our Thanksgiving box.

***

Jennifer M. – Every year one of my aunts (5) or uncles (2) on my mom’s side of the family (yep, that’s 8 kids!) volunteers to host the Thanksgiving dinner (someone else does the Christmas dinner). About 30 family members gather to eat and watch football! This year we will be at my mom’s house. This year is also very special because, Thanksgiving day is also my nephew’s first birthday! We are looking forward to celebrating his birthday on Saturday!

***

Christi – This recipe that I share with you today has been passed down in my family for several generations! It is a recipe my family makes every year for Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year’s. Why we don’t think to make it at other times throughout the year, I have no clue! There is really no reason why it couldn’t be served with other meals throughout the year! It is that good!!

The first I tasted this recipe was when I was a little girl. My “Memay” was born in 1913 in Beaver County, Oklahoma. She was my paternal grandmother. She and my grandfather had three children. My father was the middle child. I love listening to all the stories he tells us about his childhood. Life was so different back then! We really have no idea how good we have it today!

Memay was a school teacher for many years, and then after my grandfather passed away, she put herself through beauty school and became a hair stylist. Her beauty shop was located in a back room of her home. She remarried six years after my grandfather passed away, and became a step-mom to three more children. She lived the rest of her years as a homemaker.

I loved my Memay very much! She was sure one special lady!

This recipe that I share with you today was her dish that she made with every holiday meal! I guess that’s why I always thought it was cooked for just the holidays!! LOL

Since I’ve passed this recipe onto my own daughters, and to friends, I would love to share it with you, as well! I hope you will enjoy it as much as my family does, and it will soon become a holiday for you, too!

Memay’s Potato Sausage Dressing

8 large red potatoes, cubed and boiled

1 lb sage flavored sausage, browned & drained

1 green pepper, thinly diced

2 stalks of celery, thinly diced

½ small yellow onion, diced

3 Tbsp Poultry Seasoning

1 tsp ground cinnamon

½ cup of milk

¼ cup butter

Salt/pepper to taste

  • Dice green pepper, celery, onion into very small pieces; add to sausage and brown together with sausage.
  • Boil potatoes until done; drain. Add in butter and milk. Blend w/ hand mixer until smooth and creamy. Add salt & pepper to taste.
  • Add browned sausage, green pepper, celery, onion, poultry seasoning, cinnamon, and mix well.
  • Bake in pre-heated 350-degree oven uncovered for 30 minutes.

I hope you will give this recipe a try, and then let me know what you and your loved ones thought of it!  Until then, may the good Lord bless you and your loved ones during the holiday season!

***

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A Daughter’s Worth: Week 8 / Day 3 – You Can Go Too Far

November 21, 2012 by

I don’t think I could even begin to count how many times I have heard the question, “How far is too far?” And if I never have to hear that question again, it’ll be too soon. With that being said, that question has come out of my mouth. I have such a problem with this question because it is basically asking how much we can get away with. And how many times have we asked or heard someone say, “…well, the Bible only says that sex itself is wrong before marriage… It doesn’t say anything about the other stuff.” WRONG-O. Ephesians 5:3 says that the Lord wants there to be “not even a HINT of sexual immorality” in our lives.

I will be the first to admit that I did not value or protect my purity when I was in my teens. Did I have sex? No. Did I make allowances for the “other stuff”? Yes. I am being honest with you girls because I do not want you to be deceived like I was! I do not want you to think, “Well, it isn’t sex so it’s okay.” This is SO not true! It is NOT okay. Here’s why… When you start to bring the physical stuff into a relationship outside of marriage it BLINDS you and prevents you from seeing the reality of your relationship. That means that you can’t even tell if you really even like this guy! Another reason it’s not okay- The world tells you that only sex forms an attachment to a man. I can tell you first hand, that is false. You also, at some point, deal with shame and guilt.

If you’re like me and have had that “How did I get here?” moment, you know how disappointed you were. Disappointed in the boy for not stepping up and protecting your purity, but more often than not, you’re disappointed in yourself. The enemy LOVES when we have messed up and are grieving over our sin. He loves to come in and make us feel so much worse. Conviction and guilt are NOT the same thing. Conviction is from the Lord. When you are convicted about sexual purity, you know that God’s Word says to stay away from sexual immorality. And if you have taken part in sexual activity, you can repent, turn away from that sin, and run to the Lord. Guilt, on the other hand, makes you hyper-aware of your sin. You sit and you wallow in self-hatred for hours on end. And forgiving yourself? Ha! Yeah right. That never happens when we allow the enemy to make us feel guilty.

So where do we go from here if we have messed up? Or how do we prevent that from ever happening? We trust that God knows what’s best for us. He knows that it is not good for our hearts for us to take part in sexual activity outside of marriage. He knows that it will only end in heartbreak. If you’re currently having sex outside of marriage, please, please, please stop. Your Father in Heaven is not One to make rules to make us miserable. The guidelines He puts in place are to protect us, because He loves us, and He wants our future marriages to be AMAZING!! Girls, you HAVE to be intentional about setting boundaries in your dating relationships. Here are my new boundaries~ I am not going to kiss another guy until the day of my wedding. I can hear your gasps all the way from over here. I just know that I do not want the enemy to have ANY stronghold over my life, and I am not about to give him any opportunity. Set your boundaries TODAY, BEFORE you get in a relationship. Write them down. Tell them to the Lord. Tell them to a friend to hold you accountable. If a boy is pressuring you to do anything physical, I HIGHLY encourage you to get out of that relationship. You deserve to date guys who HONOR your boundaries and who have made decisions and set boundaries themselves.

Let’s pray~

Lord, Thank You for setting boundaries for us! We know that those boundaries are to protect us from heartbreak. Lord, set girls FREE who are reading this- free from sexual sin, free from the lies of the enemy! Give these girls the strength to make boundaries and stick to them. Give them armor around their hearts, that they would be guarded from any deception. Thank You for Your grace when we mess up. Thank You for freedom from sin! We praise You, Lord, for the GIFT of sex… A precious thing that is a gift if kept within the context of marriage. Give us discernment to know what is right and wrong, and give us discernment to know WHO is right and wrong for us. In Jesus’ name, Amen!

~Jordan

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For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information

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A Daughter’s Worth: Week 8 / Day 2 – You CAN Insist That Boys Treat You Well

November 20, 2012 by

When you CAN do something it means you are Able, Permitted, Possible, or Designed to do something.  That is pretty awesome to think that I was designed to be able to insist that people treat me well.  Does that mean that every person in my life WILL treat me well?  Uh, NO!  Do I have to accept that behavior from them?  Uh, No.  So, why would I let a boy treat me any less than God created me to be?  Uh, WOW.  Do you know what the past tense of CAN is??? COULD.   Could hurts me to say.  Could means that I made a bad choice and, if I could go back, I would change what happened.  Could usually comes with regret. 🙁

In our home, if we have a hard time deciding if something is right or wrong, we take it back to the Bible and see what it says about the subject.  When we have friends or family members who treat us poorly, we look to see if our behaviors have lined up with the scriptures.  The verses we go to about relationships is 1 Corinthians 13.  It’s called the LOVE chapter.  We all want to be loved and want to love other people, so why not seek out what LOVE is from the source, GOD.

 So the Bible says this is what love IS.  Anything that doesn’t look like this is NOT love and you can WALK the other way or INSIST to be treated with love.  Sometimes that is hard to do.  We may have to walk away from our friends or that cute guy that we want to like.  We may have to stand up for ourselves and tell our ‘friends’ (and sometimes our family) that we don’t want to be treated in a way that makes us feel uncomfortable.  When we deal with our friends and family, we also need to follow these verses and treat them with LOVE.

If a young man wants your attention and wants to love you, he will make you feel smart, funny and pretty. (And not because of what he can get from you)  He will never ask you to do anything that will make you ashamed or feel dirty. (Love does not insist on its own way, it does not rejoice in wrongdoing)  He will want you to spend time with your friends and family and would even want to hang out with you.  (Love is patient and kind, it does not envy, it is not arrogant or rude)  Boyfriends should draw you closer to God, not pull you away from Him.  (Love rejoices with the truth, bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things)  Boyfriends should always make you feel good inside; not sick, worthless, jealous or angry.  (Love endures all things)

When you are a teenager it is hard to find a boy that can measure up to all these standards.  Sometimes you want to lower your standards just to have someone you can call “yours”.  Each time you give your heart away, you lose a little piece of yourself.  Most teens are not able to love someone else more than they love themselves. That takes maturity and maturity comes with living life and seeking God.   It is almost impossible to find a teen boy who loves you the way God created you to be loved. It’s OK to wait for that person God has been preparing just for you.

In my family, with so many daughters, we have many different opinions on the topic of dating and boys.  Some of my daughters want to wait to have a boyfriend, to hold hands, to kiss someone; to give him her heart until she is ready to be married.  Some of my daughters enjoy having a young man to call her own and share her “life” with.  A couple have gotten tired of waiting, tried to make it happen on their own and have had broken hearts.  I love them all and continue to point them back to 1 Corinthians 13 to help them decide if they are being treated with love and if they are treating others with love.  There is no cookie cutter answer about having a boyfriend because girls are not cookies.  =D

In our study, Ava Sturgeon says, “As a daughter of worth, you should expect to be treated well.  Dating the wrong guy is a tragic waste of you.  God’s beautiful potential.”  How true!  Protect your heart.  You are going to need all those pieces of yourself.  If you find that your heart is already broken into little pieces, take them to God and let Him put them back together.  He will.  It’s not too late.  He wrote the book on LOVE, so trust Him to show you what perfect LOVE looks like.

If what you are seeing and receiving from people does not match up with what the Bible says you deserve – turn around and head back toward God.  You are on the wrong path.  That leads me back to my life verse, Proverbs 3:6, “In all your ways acknowledge Him and HE will direct your paths”. 

You CAN insist that boys/men/parents/siblings/friends treat you well.  You CAN treat them well in return.  It’s not too late to get on the right PATH facing God’s direction.  Be blessed my friends.

Let’s Pray:

Father we thank you for creating us with the desire to be loved and to want to love others.  Lord we want someone to love us the way YOU love us.  Father, give us patience to wait on the person you are preparing for us.  Give us people in our lives who support us, care about us and protect our hearts.  We know that you are the source of all love and good things and that is what we want for ourselves and for our friends.  Help us to always look to you for guidance and keep our feet on the right path.  We love you, Lord.  Amen

Mama T <3

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For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information

Filed Under: Teens Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

A Daughter’s Worth: Week 8 / Day 1 – You Can Choose the Right Guy to Date

November 19, 2012 by

When I was younger I liked guys all of the time, but I never dated any of them.  In fact they never knew I liked them and it was ok because they never liked me.  Anytime I would talk about guys and my dad would over hear he would say, “Is he a Christian?”  I used to get so annoyed with my dad for throwing in that comment any time I would talk about something as simple as a crush on the cute guy with a pretty smile in my math class.  Only after I started dating someone who was most certainly not a Christian did I wish I would have listened to the advice my dad had given me on dating years prior.

As a teenager it is so hard to truly want to listen to your parents.  You hear what they say, but you want to figure things out for your own.  You want to take risks; they want to stop you from that type of behavior.  You want to try new things; they want to tell you not to because they have been there done that and you just should not be doing certain things.  Even though we cannot see it at the time, our parents are stopping us from things because they love us.  They do not want to see us make mistakes.  I know I wish I would have listened to my parents more than I did.

I know the feeling you get when you find out a guy likes you.  I know how good attention from guys can feel.  There is one feeling that is way beyond what those ones may feel like: the love God has for you.  Do you know how good that feels?  If you do not know, I highly suggest that you spend some time getting to know God so you can find out first hand just how amazing it is!  When we truly know God’s love for us, it will make us want to find the man God has for us and not settle for any guy that thinks we are pretty or who gives us attention from time to time.

Have you ever thought about what you want in a man?  Have you ever thought about what a relationship should be like?  Try writing down a list of qualities that you would like in a man.  (See page 105 and 2 Corinthians 7:1)Keep that list and pray about it to God.  When you are in a relationship ask yourself, honestly, does this relationship bring you closer to God or pull you away from Him?  If you hold out for a man who has the qualities you have been praying for- chances are you will grow closer and closer to God together!  Any relationship that brings you closer to God is definitely a good one to have.

Personally, I struggled with dating.  I never thought that there were men out there that would be what I wanted (someone who loves God, goes to church, reads the Bible, is kind to others, and will love me as Christ wants someone to love me).  So, as my high school years came and gone, I decided that I needed to change my standards.  I ended up settling for an older man who was not a Christian.  GIRLS, this was the biggest mistake I have ever made.  I ended up stuck in an abusive relationship.  I KNOW now that waiting for the man God has for us-a good guy who is devoted to God will come our way!  God will bring you together in His timing.  It is so important to hold out for that man.  And the best part is while you wait-you have the opportunity to grow closer to God and experience so much of the perfect love He has for you!

Please remember that you are not defined by what guys say or by how they make you feel, if you are getting attention from them, or getting no attention at all.  The only thing you are defined by is the love Jesus has for YOU!  You have the privilege to CHOOSE the man you go on a date with.  Make sure you make God apart of your choosing process.  Praying to Him to lead you to the right man will save you from heartache and the pain of dating the wrong one!

Let’s Pray: 

Lord, I thank you so much that you love us with unconditional love that no man will ever be able to replace.  I love that you have handpicked a man for us if that is your will in our lives.  I pray that these girls and I are able to hold out for this man.  I pray that we never settle for less than the best you have for us.  As these girls start to date, I pray that they choose wisely the men they bring into their lives.  May they seek you in each decision they make.  We love you so much and thank you for guarding our hearts.  AMEN!

Much Love to YOU all,

Diane

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For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information

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A Daughter’s Worth Week 8: Dating With Discretion

November 18, 2012 by

 Proverbs 2:11-12

Discretion will protect you, and understanding will guard you. Wisdom will save you…

A few words from Megan…

My dear friends….. PLEASE, please, please listen carefully to the lessons from this week in our book A Daughter’s Worth. This week is all about exploring the rewards and responsibilities of letting God be your matchmaker….. and accepting God’s plan for your life!

I know there is so much pressure in your day-to-day lives from friends and the media telling you that you MUST have a boyfriend. I can understand you WANTING one… I wanted one too, when I was your age. I wanted one so badly (because all of my friends had them and I felt left out…) that I didn’t make the best choices in dating. As an adult, I am still dealing with the insecurities that came from those relationships, too. I was too impatient and was not willing to hold out for what GOD had for me, and I pray that through studying God’s Word this week, you will be EMPOWERED by all of the things you CAN DO through God’s supernatural strength in dating.

This week, we will explore how….

  • You CAN choose the right guy to date
  • You CAN insist that boys treat you well
  • You CAN go too far
  • You CAN handle a difficult break-up
  • You CAN enjoy being single

…And on Saturday, we will continue with Coleen’s series: Lord Teach Us To Pray: Part 9

A few words from Morgan…..

Hey girls… hope you are having a good week! This week is all about boys and relationships, which I have never done! I’ve never had a boyfriend but I have learned that God has such an AMAZING guy out there for you and that at the right time, He will reveal him and show you who you are supposed to be with. This week we will also talk about how you shouldn’t settle for less! You are a princess in Christ and you should find a man of God that will treat you like that and nothing less, and PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE don’t ever lower your standards or not insist that you are treated right. So, I just want to do a prayer for this week that is along the lines of what I pray constantly. It has helped me just be content with being single.

 Let’s Pray:

Dear God, thank you for the man of God that You have planned out for me and that You have found for me, God I just pray that You will give him strength to wait out for me, and if not, I will always love the same. God, give him comfort, and God please give me comfort. I pray that you will help me not settle for less, and wait it out for the right guy that You have for me. Thank you so much, I love you. In Jesus Name, Amen.

It’s just a simple little prayer, and even shorter at times, that I pray for my husband because I already know that I will love him so much. God has a plan, girls!

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For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information

Filed Under: Teens Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

A Daughter’s Worth Week 7/ Day 5: Families Bless Us

November 16, 2012 by

Proverbs 17:6

Children’s children are a crown to the aged, and parents are the pride of their children.

Ok girls, how many of you grew up in the perfect family where everyone is always happy and smiling? Where no one is trying to put the blame on somebody else and mom and dad never exchange dirty looks or utter harsh words? I wish I could put my hand up and say that I grew up in the perfect family, but that would be a lie!

I am one of 5 children, I have 3 brothers and 1 sister. My mom has been married 3 times and all 3 husbands passed away. When my mom was 6 months pregnant with me, my dad, her 2nd husband was hit by a train. I was about 2 years old when she married again and about 4 when my baby brother was born.

I remember being extremely jealous of the new addition to our family because he had someone to call dad. But what an amazing man my step dad was. Even though he had his very own son, he still treated the 4 of us as his own. He put the 4 of through college, and when my brother was in his senior year in high school, my step dad passed away and the 4 of us stepped up and was able to pay my baby brother’s college tuition.

Things might not always be the way we want them to be, but when we think back on everything that has happened in our lives , we can see how God and our families have blessed us.

Our parents might work on our nerves at times, they might fail and dissapoint us, they might give us advice that we think we don’t need because we know it all. But just think back on who was there to hold your hand when you did not feel well, who made you cookies when that guy dumped you, or who paid for that outfit that you really, really wanted. We might not always agree with everything they say and do, but our families are a blessing.

Be blessed!

Edwina

Let us pray:

Father God, today we want to thank you for our families. Although we do not always get along, we want to thank you for each one of them. I pray that in tough situations we will come to You, knowing that You know best and will guide us in the right direction. Amen.

________________________________________

For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information

Filed Under: Teens Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
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