November 15, 2024

Captivating: Introduction

 

Stasi Eldredge

 

 

Welcome Girlfriends,

It’s time to begin our journey through Captivating.  Are you ready? LET’S DO IT!

I must say that I was happy to read in the introduction that Captivating is not another book about all the things that I am failing to do as woman.  In this book, we are not going to go through 12 steps or 10 ways or 5 things on how to become Captivating.  No all of such books are bad or not worthy of your time but I am sure you and I have read a number of such books and like our author Stasi Eldredge, you have been left feeling like “you are not the woman you ought to be.” 

I am pleased to note that femininity cannot be prescribed in a formula.  So this means that I should not judge myself if I don’t love playing dress up, tea parties and china or if I shudder at the thought of women who love to hunt or go hiking through the mountains.  As a woman I have to be happy with who I am whether I am a professor, an athlete, a mom, a secretary or a social worker.  Whether I relate more to Cinderella or Joan of Arc, the most important thing that I should embrace is that I AM A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN.

It is sad that as women we tend to fall into stereotypes, if we don’t fit a certain group or clique, we sideline one another and this puts so much pressure on us to conform to a particular lifestyle.  We need to know that although we may have different lifestyles or likes or dislikes, we share something deep and true, down in our hearts.

Through this book we will find out what is at the core of each woman’s heart? What are our desires? What did we long for as little girls?  What do we still long for as women? And how does a woman begin to be healed from the wounds and tragedies of her life?

 

We are going to find that precious thing that has been lost –

OUR PRICELESS FEMININE HEART.

Do you remember when you first knew in your heart that you were no longer a girl, but had become a woman?  Was it high school or college? Or when you got married or when you become a mom? Like our author Stasi, I don’t either.  I have gone through all the phases of life as a girl and then as a woman but I cannot really pin point the exact moment when I can say wow, I feel like a woman now.  I sometimes look at myself in the mirror and still see the little girl in me.  The little girl who still wants to play with a Barbie doll, or the teenager who wants to stay indoors and read the romance books that the adults around her are reading or the first year student who wants to curl up and talk hours on the phone about the college guys or gossip about who is dating who or who got humiliated at the fresh man’s ball.  When I got married I couldn’t wait to join the women’s clique and talk about our husbands and children, share the secrets about how to treat your husband with respect or how to raise godly children, how to take care of the home and all sorts of things that we as women talk about when we are all gathered in one place.

In each phase of life, there are expectations that are laid upon us by our families, our churches and our cultures.  There are reams of materials on what we ought to do to be a good woman.  But that is not the same thing as knowing what the journey toward becoming a woman involves, or even what the goal should be.

As Christian women, most of us have been told that “you are here to serve.  That’s why God created you: to serve; in the nursery, in the kitchen, on the various committees, in your home and in your community.”  We are expected to be sweet, helpful, disciplined and composed.  Not a hair out of place.

Most of us look to the Proverbs 31 woman as an example of how femininity ought to be.  The more we try to do what she did, the more we fail.  In the end we become tired and disgruntled.  How did she manage to do all that she did and have time for friendships, for taking walks or read good books, our author asks?  Is this the measure we are to use in order to be characterized as godly women?

Let’s take this journey together to get the answer the above question and more.  Let us recover together the things we have lost. Most of all let us come to the point where we accept that we are CAPTIVATING.

 *****

LET’S PRAY

Father, thank You for being with us as we begin this journey together.  I pray that we will allow You to remove the things in our lives that have hindered us to become who we truly are.  Help us to embrace our true femininity and not the stereotypes that we have accepted in our lives.  Most of all lead us to the place where it all begun, in our heart.  Begin anew with us.  In Jesus Name.  Amen.

 *****

YOUR ASSIGNMENT

Let us get to know one another by sharing who we are by identifying the characters that we relate to? Are you a Cinderella or Joan of Arc, or Mary Magdalene or Oprah?  What delights you tea parties and china or are you the adventure type or woman who loves to hunt, mountain climbing or parachuting in the sky?

 

Read Proverbs 31 and tell me your thoughts on the Proverbs Woman.  In what way do you relate to her?

 

Be Blessed,

Jackie

 



If you are interested in joining this amazing online Bible study, click HERE to sign up. Once you are registered, you will receive an email with further details.

If you would like to send a personal message to Jackie in regards to this blog, you may email her at: Jackie@girlfriendscoffeehour.com.

Captivating: Week 1 Reading Assignments

The time is here! We are ready to start! I consider myself blessed to be able to share this journey with you. I have faith that God is going to work in this group over the next few months and we are going to see big things happen!

Here is our reading assignment for the coming week.  Please let me know if you have any questions, or if you are still not quite sure how this whole online study works.  We are here for each other and we want you to get the most out of this study.  Don’t be shy!  We were all new once 🙂

WEEK of JANUARY 6

Chapter 1: The Heart of a Woman

Sunday:  Michelle – Reading Assignment

Monday:  Jackie – The Heart of A Woman (Intro) through A Woman’s Journey

Tuesday:  Tonya – Unseen, Unsought & Uncertain through The Heart of a Woman

Wednesday:  Carissa – To Be Romanced through Beauty to Unveil

Thursday: Michelle – The Heart of a Man through By Way of the Heart

Friday: Jackie – Weekly Review

LET’S PRAY

Father God, as we begin this study I ask You to join us.  We are all in different places in our walk, but You know the heart’s of each and every woman here.  Meet each of us where we are and take us on an amazing journey of growth, love and grace.  We thank You for Your blessing on this study.  We are grateful for Your mercy.   Thank You for loving us.  In Your holy name we pray.  Amen.

In Him,

Michelle



If you are interested in joining this amazing online Bible study, click HERE to sign up. Once you are registered, you will receive an email with further details.

If you would like to send Michelle an email in regards to this blog, please send it to: Michelle@girlfriendscoffeehour.com.

Love Letters from God by Diane Meyers

Today, we want to introduce you to a new blog by Diane Meyers.  Diane was a part of our Singles Ministry during the last bible study that we shared, and then decided she needed to focus on the Teens ministry instead; but her heart was still with the Singles.  She shared with me some of her personal journaling, and throughout that the idea of “Love Letters from God” developed.

Diane will share her letters once a month on the Singles blog.  I hope you enjoy her writing, and these awesome letters, as much as I have!  ~~ Christi Wilson, Founder of Girlfriends Coffee Hour

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My story is made up of many love letters written from my heart to God’s heart and from His to mine.  I open up to Him with a pen in my hand and a journal in my lap.  The Lord speaks to me through my writings and I am beyond excited to share with you bits and pieces of different letters I have from God.  I share parts of my story so that God’s love, power, grace, forgiveness, and perfectness may be showcased.  As you read, I pray the Lord grabs a hold of your heart and fills you with hope!

Psalm 34:5 Those who look to him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame.

~*~*~*~*~

Dear Precious Daughter,

Did you know that you are beautiful?  No matter what you see when you look in the mirror, my beauty is there for you to hold onto.  Do you know what I see when I look down and see your face?  I see my princess, the one I have chosen to love and care for.  I care for you with the most perfect love you will ever experience.  Such love will bring joy to your face.  What is this shame you are hiding yourself in?  This was never intended for you to carry.  I desire so strongly to take the shame you hide your face in every day away from your hands.  I pray that you will see MY beauty that radiates through you from your heart.

When I think of you I think of our beautiful story we have together.  The times where you cannot see me are the times you refuse to get rid of this shame.  Do you know the beautiful story we have together?  I want you to embrace me.  The shame in your life is bringing us further apart.  It is your choice, you can choose shame or you can choose my embrace.  I pray you choose my embrace always.

Love Continually,

God

Love Letters from God

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank you so much for bringing your beauty to every part of my life-even the most shameful parts.  It comforts my heart incredibly that where shame once was in my life it is no longer found.  All that is there is your beauty!  I cannot believe you love me enough to wait patiently every moment of every day for me to hand over to you all that is keeping me from your loving embrace.  I have learned true love waits.  I have learned true love brings beauty to every detail and rejoices in imperfections.  Those imperfections are true examples of your PERFECTNESS!  I find in my imperfections more and more of your perfect beauty!

Please hold onto my heart and let me sway in the direction you want me to walk in every moment of every day-there I will find no shame or burdens, just YOU.  I thank you that I do not need to feel shame; I can choose to feel your love.  That is a choice I pray I have the strength to make every day over and over again.

Love,

Your Shameless Daughter all because of YOU

 



Questions for Reflection

1.        Do you carry around shame from past experiences or bad choices in your life?

2.       Believe that you are not intended to carry around shame, worries, anxieties, or burdens.  God has died for you to live a life free of burdens in HIM.  1 Peter 5:7 Cast all of your anxieties on GOD for HE cares for you.  Memorize this verse and practice giving God all of your anxieties-even if you have to do it multiple times a day!

3.       Spend some time talking with God today.  What does He want to tell you?  I pray you hear his still small voice.

With Love,

Diane

copyright_diane meyers

Captivating Begins Jan 6, 2013!! Are You Ready?

New Year Greetings!

My name is Jackie Chingawale, and I am the Singles Ministry Co-Leader of Girlfriends Coffee Hour, also known as GCH.

I want to welcome you to GCH! We are a group of women all across the world that love the Lord Jesus, and are always looking for ways to better our walk with Him, and improve not only our selves, but those around us, as well. PLEASE be sure to read this blog post all the way through, as I will be taking you through some things that you need to know in order to have a great experience.

Beginning on Sunday 6 January 2013, we will embark upon a new journey with our second Singles Ministry Online Bible Study “Captivating – Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul by John & Stasi Eldredge”.

captivating

I can’t begin to tell you just how excited I am about this study! Being involved in the GCH Singles Ministry, I have learned so many things from the ladies that joined the first study.  As women whether single or married, we have so many things in common.  But most of all, we all want to feel special and loved.

 

As I began going through Captivating, I wanted to write down all of the things I could find that would help explain to you what you can expect from this study.

  • Through Captivating we are going to learn what is at the core of a woman’s heart.  What are our desires?  What did we long for when we were little girls?  What do we still long for as women?  How do we begin to be healed from the wounds and tragedies of our lives?
  • Captivating is not a book about all the things that we are failing to do as women.  Most of us have grown up being told that we don’t measure up, if you act like so and so you will be accepted or if you follow these 10 steps, you will meet the grade.  We will learn who a true woman is – whether you relate more to Cinderella or Joan of Arc.
  • You will discover that God has set within you a femininity that is powerful and tender, fierce and alluring.  It may have been misunderstood or assaulted but it is there and it is worth recovering.
  • As we take this journey of discovery and healing, you will be assured that your heart is the prize of God’s Kingdom, and Jesus has come to win you back for himself.
  • You will find hope and practical illustrations to apply to everyday challenges in being God’s woman.
  • You will find prayer, support, encouragement, accountability, motivation, love, from other women, just like you, who are currently single or divorced or married, and are willing to share how they face each day with the help of Christ Jesus.

Wow! Now can you see why I am so very excited to go on this journey with you!!??

____________

Let’s talk about HOW this Online Bible Study works.

1. Each SUNDAY, you will want to come right here, our website, for your reading assignment for the week.

2. Every Monday through Friday, you will come back here again, to read what we have blogged about for that day’s lesson.

3. You can leave your comments in the comment section of this blog, if you wish. We actually like it when you do because it gives us feedback on how we’re doing! So please do comment! Remember, anything shared here on our blog is open to the public. It is not private. HOWEVER, you do have the option of commenting anonymously, as well.

4. Then if you are signed up for this study, you will go to the Facebook Online Bible Study Discussion Group that you have been assigned to, to discuss that day’s lesson just a bit deeper than we do here on the blog. The Facebook Group is where you will be able to share openly and honestly without anyone outside of that group reading what you’ve posted. This Facebook Group is set up to be a SECRET Facebook group. That means two things: 1) No one outside of the group can even find this group, and 2) Everything shared within the group cannot be seen by anyone outside of the group! How cool is that, huh? We want to make sure that we provide a place for you to share your heart without the concerns of a friend or family member seeing what you are posting! We take every precaution to make the Facebook Groups a SAFE place for you!

That’s it! Pretty Simple, huh?? There are just TWO places that you will want to check every day: HERE (our blog) and Your Facebook Group! It can’t get much easier than that!!

In your Facebook Group, we have a team of women put together for you that will be there to pray with you, and encourage you along the way. They are members of our Prayer Team better known as PoPpers (POP stands for Power of Prayer), who have specifically asked to be placed in the Single Women’s Ministry group. They have a heart for prayer, and for single women’s ministry! I’m sure you will grow to love them just as much as we do!!

We also have an AMAZING Team of Bloggers, who will be blogging about this study! You are going to love these women and their hearts for the Lord, and for Singles Ministry! We took quite a while looking for the perfect women to work with us on this journey, and we believe we have found the perfect women for this study! We can’t wait for you to meet them! Their names are Michelle Graziano my Co-leader, Tonya Ellison, Carissa Markantone and I. Amazing Women!!!

DON’T FORGET TO MARK YOUR CALENDARS!!

Sunday, January 6th, the Bible study begins!  Come back here on Sunday, to get the reading assignment for the week and more.

__________________

Let’s Pray:

Father, we come before You today with thanksgiving in our hearts as we start our new Bible study, Captivating.  Lord, we ask You to start with us and be with us in every area of our study.  We commit every woman who has joined us on this journey that You will bless them.  Help us to stay committed and to learn from You.  Holy Spirit be our guide, comforter and helper throughout this study.  Help us to find the woman that you created us to be.  In Jesus Name Amen.

Be Blessed,

Jackie


To sign up for this Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to studying “Captivating” with you!!

“Captivating” Coming Soon to Girlfriends Coffee Hour

Captivating

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year from Girlfriends Coffee Hour

Merry Christmas

All of us here at Girlfriends Coffee Hour want to wish you and your loved ones a very Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

We will be taking this week off to celebrate the holidays with our loved ones.  We will be praying for you, and your loved ones.  May the good Lord bless your time together, and bring His amazing grace, peace, and agape love into your homes!

We’ll be back again next Sunday with more news about our upcoming 2013 studies!  

Until then, God bless you & your loved ones!!

Christi, Megan, and the GCH Leadership Team

________________________________

A Lady In Waiting: A Reflection

Here is a little fun fact about me…up until two years ago I have NEVER finished reading a book.  Sometimes I would only get two chapters in, other times I got to almost the end but never made it to the last page of the book.  The first book I have ever finished reading completely was A Lady In Waiting! I remember thinking to myself this must have been a really good book because I actually read the entire thing!  That thought was confirmed when I decided to read it a second time with all of you ladies!  One thing that foolishly kept me reading, the first time around, was thinking if I made it to the last page once I flipped it over I would be guaranteed a husband.  In a way that was such a false thought, but in another way I found out what this book did guarantee for me and it proved to be way better than a husband!

For a girl who really struggled with everything that goes along with men, this book was just what I needed-a Godsend if you will.  When I read the title alone I knew I needed it.  I felt God saying to me, buy this book now!  So I did, and from that moment on I went on a journey with God.  One in which He showed me that my love story is not about just any man I may meet one day, it is about ME and GOD.

The first night I started reading the book I could not stop reading.  I highlighted so many words and sentences, I took notes feverishly; you would have thought someone would be quizzing me the next day on what I was reading.  I honestly could not get enough of GOD’S truth that I was reading on each page.  God used this book to draw me closer to Him.  It was through this book that I learned being single is not about me finding my husband, it is about me finding my God.  After the first night I started reading I decided to really find out all I possibly could about who God was to me.

When I first read this book, I was just fine waiting on my husband.  In fact, I still had such a sour taste in my mouth about all men; I was perfectly fine waiting forever.  The second time around that was not the case.  Two years later I found myself completely healed from past hurts with men (thank you Jesus).  Honestly, my heart was ready for a relationship and simply got tired of waiting.  This book has helped me learn what I am supposed to be doing while I wait.  Patience is not all about waiting; it is about our attitude as we wait.  Are we sulking in self-pity because we are alone or are we enjoying and making the most of the time we have alone with God?  This book is filled with the joys of singleness-having time with God.  I have found that when serving God that is when I am closest to Him.  I have decided to serve Him every chance I get and not missing out on those chances because of feeling like I am missing out on my husband.

A Lady In Waiting is overflowing with Godly advice on waiting for a relationship, being in a relationship, and the man you will be in that relationship with.  That is the main reason why I sort of kind of believed that I would finally have a ring on my finger after reading.  The fact of the matter is this book is not our life story.  It does not even come close.  God has written a perfectly thought out and breath-taking story for each and every one of us!  He knows our hearts, thoughts, souls, and desires.  He knows what is best for us and wants us to feel His love every moment of every day.  Singleness may be just a season for some and it may be a lifetime here on Earth for some; but thankfully a relationship with God is not just a season and it lasts longer than a lifetime here on Earth.  Our relationship with God takes us into eternity to be with our Bridegroom in Heaven forever and always!  That is where our joy is found, in a right relationship with God.

Being single does not accurately define us ladies in waiting.  In fact we are not single at all we are in a relationship with God.  With that truth shining so bright I am almost embarrassed of what a worldly demand I had when I first sat down to read this book-to have a ring on my finger afterwards.  What a unfulfilling desire to work towards.  The second time I read A Lady In Waiting with all of you I think I finally got “it”.  This book was not created to guarantee a ring on our finger after completion of the last word on the last page of the book.  Quite the contrary, this book was created to guarantee a stronger, closer, more personal relationship with our God!  It is not about the accessory of a shiny ring, it is about the accessory of the love of JesusRings will not last forever but HIS love will! 

I pray that after completion of this book, you accept and show off the most beautiful part of your story, JESUS’ LOVE.  I pray this book has guaranteed the same for you as it has for me, a closer more personal relationship with the complete love of your soul: Jesus Christ!


Let’s Pray: 

Lord, thank you for the study of A Lady In Waiting that you have brought into each of our lives.  I pray that each woman in this study leaves this study with a closer, stronger relationship with you.  I thank you for your many blessings you pour out on us daily.  Help us to remember the beautiful accessory you are in our lives each and every day.  Thank you for the story you have created for us and we trust you to write every page just the way you want!  We love you so incredibly much, Amen.

Your Assignment: 

Spend time reflecting on this study.  Has this study brought you closer to God?  Do you find fulfillment in the accessory of Jesus’ love or are you still waiting for that ring?  Let us know how we can be praying for you!



Our Next Single Women’s Online Bible Study

“Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul”

by John & Stasi Eldredge

Begins January 6, 2013

Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman's Soul

Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul

To sign up for this Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to studying “Captivating” with you!!

Lady in Waiting: Take the Radical Route

 

“Does it seem too unrealistic for today’s woman to set her sights on a knight in shining armor?…A single friend (a modern Ruth) wrote a letter in which she admitted that her high ideals often made her feel like the “Lone Ranger.” She said, “So often I meet women who don’t want to go the deeper, more radical route of separation from our culture in seeking after God’s standards.” Do we lower our standards because we seem out of step with all our peers? Does the woman in Proverbs 31 seem obsolete? Maybe for the “cosmopolitan” woman she is obsolete, but not for the Lady of Conviction. God has the best in hand for those who seek Him.

Ruth’s choice to wait for God’s best resulted in her union with a Boaz rather than a Bozo. Ruth not only married a man who was a “pillar of strength” (Boaz), but she also was blessed by the privilege of bearing a son (Obed) who would be part of the lineage of Jesus Christ. Ruth’s wise choices resulted in her experiencing God’s overwhelming goodness.

During this study, we have talked a lot about our convictions, setting standards that honor both God and our princess status, as well as sticking to those standards despite the condition of the world around us. If we live radically in our convictions, then we should expect opposition. Have you experienced any opposition from friends or family so far? What have they said? More importantly, how have you responded?

Let’s Pray

Father, we thank You for instilling Your Spirit in us, the One who convicts our hearts and draws us closer to Yours. Lord, You promise to uphold us as we follow You. So, Father, we want to hold You to Your promise and ask that You give us the strength to stand firm in our convictions when criticism, doubt, and peer pressure arise. Father, we can do nothing apart from You. Be with us always. We love You, Jesus. In your precious name we pray, Amen.


Our Next Single Women’s Online Bible Study

“Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul”

by John & Stasi Eldredge 

begins January 6, 2013

To sign up for this Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to studying “Captivating” with you!!

Lady in Waiting: Meditations: You Must Move In, Hannah Whitall Smith

John 15: 9-10

John 15: 9-10

Life can feel so complicated and complex at times, answers can feel so far away and four words “abide in my love” can seem unrealistic and unattainable. How do I abide in His love? How do I find that place that Hannah Whitall Smith describes as a place without the fear of “supposes”? Well, her words tell us to simply move in. John 15: 9-10 does not tell us that we have to be single or married, young or old, whether we have children or not doesn’t matter either. What matters is that we are all children of God and He is our dwelling place, He is our safe place, our place without the worry of fear.

Throughout this study we have had to look deep into ourselves, we have had to ask ourselves questions that may have been difficult, our hearts may have changed, and our way of thinking may have been evaluated; but, in the end it brought us closer to God, closer to our safe place.

I’ve said from the beginning that our relationship is the number one priority, not our status in life. We can abide in His love because He says we can. While you are a lady in waiting, after you are married, and every place in between, abide in His love.

“God is your dwelling place, and you must see to it that you take up your abode there. You must move in.”

 


Let’s Pray:

Dear Heavenly Father, Thank You for a safe place from the fear of the “supposes”.  Thank You for loving us, loving us enough to open Your heart and Your arms to us, regardless of our status. Thank You for using this study to teach us, for using it to help us grow closer to You.  Please help us to continue to grow and learn, please encourage us to abide in You despite the complications of life.  In Jesus’ name, amen.

Your Assignment:

What does abiding in God’s love mean to you?

 


Our Next Single Women’s Online Bible Study

“Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul”

by John & Stasi Eldredge

Begins January 6, 2013

To sign up for this Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to studying “Captivating” with you!!

Lady in Waiting: Meditation: Reality Vs. Fantasy

2 Corinthians 10:5

2 Corinthians 10:5

Meditation from page 292 of “Lady in Waiting”.

“An important method of limiting your own self-defrauding is through daily discipline over “prenuptial fantasies.”  Such fantasies may provide you an escape from monotonous reality, but these moments are dangerous.  They will aggravate your struggle for contentment because they are not innocent daydreams, but an attack on your godly contentment.  You may be so used to daily fantasies that you might not even realize when you begin daydreaming again about your prince.”

“Often single women’s struggle with contentment can be traced back to her fantasies more than to her frustrating circumstances.  Just think for a moment about three words from 2 Corinthians 10:5: Casting down imaginations.  Fantasizing about a future with a guy you have been watching in Sunday school or at work is nothing more than your very active imagination.  What should you do when you start daydreaming about a guy you’ve never dated or even formally met?  You must take your thoughts to Jesus and leave them in His capable hands.  This daily discipline of taking your fantasies to Jesus is the foundation for your future as a contented woman, whether you are married or single.”

LET’S PRAY
Father God, we treasure our time with You. So many times we talk incessantly about our needs, our wants, our hopes and dreams. We know that You love hearing our cares, but we also know You love to speak to us also. Help us to slow down in our prayer and devotional time so that we can hear from You. It is You who guide us, and without taking the time to listen to the guidance we will become lost. Thank you Jesus for Your patience and love as we continue the process of drawing close to You.

YOUR ASSIGNMENT
Please share your thoughts on today’s meditation, either in full or in part, below as well as in our Facebook group. Our hope is that you take the time to journal these meditations so that you have them to look back on and use them to help you grow.

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Our Next Single Women’s Online Bible Study

“Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul”

by John & Stasi Eldredge

Begins January 6, 2013

To sign up for this Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to studying “Captivating” with you!!