May 10, 2024

Captivating Begins Jan 6, 2013!! Are You Ready?

January 4, 2013 by

New Year Greetings!

My name is Jackie Chingawale, and I am the Singles Ministry Co-Leader of Girlfriends Coffee Hour, also known as GCH.

I want to welcome you to GCH! We are a group of women all across the world that love the Lord Jesus, and are always looking for ways to better our walk with Him, and improve not only our selves, but those around us, as well. PLEASE be sure to read this blog post all the way through, as I will be taking you through some things that you need to know in order to have a great experience.

Beginning on Sunday 6 January 2013, we will embark upon a new journey with our second Singles Ministry Online Bible Study “Captivating – Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul by John & Stasi Eldredge”.

captivating

I can’t begin to tell you just how excited I am about this study! Being involved in the GCH Singles Ministry, I have learned so many things from the ladies that joined the first study.  As women whether single or married, we have so many things in common.  But most of all, we all want to feel special and loved.

 

As I began going through Captivating, I wanted to write down all of the things I could find that would help explain to you what you can expect from this study.

  • Through Captivating we are going to learn what is at the core of a woman’s heart.  What are our desires?  What did we long for when we were little girls?  What do we still long for as women?  How do we begin to be healed from the wounds and tragedies of our lives?
  • Captivating is not a book about all the things that we are failing to do as women.  Most of us have grown up being told that we don’t measure up, if you act like so and so you will be accepted or if you follow these 10 steps, you will meet the grade.  We will learn who a true woman is – whether you relate more to Cinderella or Joan of Arc.
  • You will discover that God has set within you a femininity that is powerful and tender, fierce and alluring.  It may have been misunderstood or assaulted but it is there and it is worth recovering.
  • As we take this journey of discovery and healing, you will be assured that your heart is the prize of God’s Kingdom, and Jesus has come to win you back for himself.
  • You will find hope and practical illustrations to apply to everyday challenges in being God’s woman.
  • You will find prayer, support, encouragement, accountability, motivation, love, from other women, just like you, who are currently single or divorced or married, and are willing to share how they face each day with the help of Christ Jesus.

Wow! Now can you see why I am so very excited to go on this journey with you!!??

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Let’s talk about HOW this Online Bible Study works.

1. Each SUNDAY, you will want to come right here, our website, for your reading assignment for the week.

2. Every Monday through Friday, you will come back here again, to read what we have blogged about for that day’s lesson.

3. You can leave your comments in the comment section of this blog, if you wish. We actually like it when you do because it gives us feedback on how we’re doing! So please do comment! Remember, anything shared here on our blog is open to the public. It is not private. HOWEVER, you do have the option of commenting anonymously, as well.

4. Then if you are signed up for this study, you will go to the Facebook Online Bible Study Discussion Group that you have been assigned to, to discuss that day’s lesson just a bit deeper than we do here on the blog. The Facebook Group is where you will be able to share openly and honestly without anyone outside of that group reading what you’ve posted. This Facebook Group is set up to be a SECRET Facebook group. That means two things: 1) No one outside of the group can even find this group, and 2) Everything shared within the group cannot be seen by anyone outside of the group! How cool is that, huh? We want to make sure that we provide a place for you to share your heart without the concerns of a friend or family member seeing what you are posting! We take every precaution to make the Facebook Groups a SAFE place for you!

That’s it! Pretty Simple, huh?? There are just TWO places that you will want to check every day: HERE (our blog) and Your Facebook Group! It can’t get much easier than that!!

In your Facebook Group, we have a team of women put together for you that will be there to pray with you, and encourage you along the way. They are members of our Prayer Team better known as PoPpers (POP stands for Power of Prayer), who have specifically asked to be placed in the Single Women’s Ministry group. They have a heart for prayer, and for single women’s ministry! I’m sure you will grow to love them just as much as we do!!

We also have an AMAZING Team of Bloggers, who will be blogging about this study! You are going to love these women and their hearts for the Lord, and for Singles Ministry! We took quite a while looking for the perfect women to work with us on this journey, and we believe we have found the perfect women for this study! We can’t wait for you to meet them! Their names are Michelle Graziano my Co-leader, Tonya Ellison, Carissa Markantone and I. Amazing Women!!!

DON’T FORGET TO MARK YOUR CALENDARS!!

Sunday, January 6th, the Bible study begins!  Come back here on Sunday, to get the reading assignment for the week and more.

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Let’s Pray:

Father, we come before You today with thanksgiving in our hearts as we start our new Bible study, Captivating.  Lord, we ask You to start with us and be with us in every area of our study.  We commit every woman who has joined us on this journey that You will bless them.  Help us to stay committed and to learn from You.  Holy Spirit be our guide, comforter and helper throughout this study.  Help us to find the woman that you created us to be.  In Jesus Name Amen.

Be Blessed,

Jackie

To sign up for this Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to studying “Captivating” with you!!

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Lady in Waiting: Lady of Conviction – Wedding Day Chains

November 29, 2012 by

 

Today, I want to introduce you to Carissa Markantone.  Carissa will be blogging for you every Thursday, for our Singles Ministry.  I am extremely excited to have Carissa join us!   — Christi Wilson

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He asked. She said yes.  But in the back of her mind, something wasn’t right.  To be honest, something wasn’t right way before he asked.  But she ignored it.  After all, she’d seen his progress.  He was actually going to church now, he was leading prayer before each meal, he was reading his Bible on a … weekly basis.  That has to count for something, right?  She’d convinced herself that his “progress” was good enough.  Good enough to put a ring on it.

Three weeks later, she took the ring off.  And with tears streaming down her face, she gave it back.  Oh, and did I tell you? That woman…was me.

I’d love to tell you that since then, I’ve changed my ways.  I’d love to tell you that I haven’t been out on a date with a non-believer or lukewarm Christian ever since my broken engagement.  But I can’t because that would be a lie.  As our authors point out, I’ve definitely justified a date or two “in the guise of being a witness for Jesus.”

When you think of a missionary dater, what does she look like? My imagination runs wild with some Bible-banging woman speaking about Jesus with every other sentence.  In reality, this isn’t the case.  Missionary dating looks just like normal dating.  I think of Mary Poppins and her “spoonful of sugar.”  What does Ms. Poppins do when the children don’t want to take their yucky medicine?  Why, she simply adds a spoonful of sugar! What does the missionary dater do when her man doesn’t want to include Jesus in his life?  When he doesn’t want to pray, read his Bible, or go to church?  Why, she simply adds romance (the spoonful of sugar) to help that yucky medicine go down!

Have you ever caught yourself justifying a relationship or a date that wasn’t God-centered as I have?  Missionary dating begins as a condition of the heart.  We’ve discussed motives a lot in this study, but the missionary dating motive is a dangerous one because it intertwines both emotional and spiritual intimacy with someone of the opposite sex.  Once those intimate bonds are formed, they are hard to break. In fact, only God can break them. So avoid creating those bonds with non-believers or even those with superficial faith.  If a man isn’t encouraging you to grow and isn’t challenging you in your own walk with the Lord, then he isn’t God’s best! Proverbs 4:23. Guard your hearts, ladies!

“You must set a higher standard and resist dating a guy who is not growing in his intimacy with Christ.”

So what does “growing in his intimacy with Christ” look like? I’d like to draw on the commonly quoted distinction –it’s more than religion; it’s a relationship.  Relationships require a desire for commitment, a devotion of time, and a consistent communication.  Does the man you’re interested in display these characteristics?  Did he prior to meeting you? Ladies, it’s more than attending church every week.  It’s more than saying a prayer before each meal.  And it’s certainly more than a coerced time spent with God every week.  He must want God.  He must want God more than he wants you.  Wow, that’s powerful.  He must want a relationship with Jesus more than he wants a relationship with you.

Regardless of your relationship status right now, let’s meditate on Ephesians 6:18:  “And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests.  With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.” (NIV) So, ladies, pray in the Spirit.  Submit your hearts and minds to the direction and leading of the Holy Spirit, and then pray in His power. Let Him lead you, and listen to Him and only Him.  Put aside your good intentions, and let God take the reins.

God bless,

Carissa

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Let’s Pray:
Father God, we thank you for Your awesome power.  Father, that You and only You have the power to change the hearts of men.  Help us surrender our own will and our good intentions to You.  Father, give us patience for Your timing, trust in Your plans, and hope for the future You have in store for us.  While we wait, Father, let us live for You and You alone.  Let us be a light to a lost world by living for You each day.    Thank you, Jesus, for your unfailing love and grace.  In your Holy Name we pray, Amen.

Your Assignment:
These questions are loaded, so be prepared!

What is the problem with dating guys who are good, but who are not Christians? What is the difference between a good man who goes to church and a growing Christian man?  What difference would it make in marriage?
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For the “Lady in Waiting” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage, which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

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Carissa Markantone joins us from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania where she’s lived nearly all of her 25 years.

Carissa was saved at the age of 5, but recently rededicated her life to Christ a little more than a year ago.  She has a huge heart for serving others, especially children with terminal illnesses.

Carissa desires to live every day for her King, striving for more of Him and less of her with each waking day.  Outside of her analyst duties at a major sporting goods retailer, Carissa enjoys spending her time with friends and family, reading, writing, working out, and singing praises to her Savior at the top of her lungs (the neighbors haven’t complained…yet)!

Carissa desires for every woman to know her worth through the eyes of God.  Her motto for 2012 (which will definitely carry to 2013) is “get comfortable with the uncomfortable.”  God doesn’t call us to an easy life.  Living for Him is hard, but it will be so worth it once we get Home!

Girlfriends Coffee Hour is very excited to add Carissa to our Singles blogging team!.  She has been an active participant in our Singles Ministry, and has been such a joy!  God is doing great things in her life!

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Lady in Waiting: Chance Rendezvous

October 16, 2012 by

It all comes down to trust.  It seems to always come down to trust, doesn’t it?  No matter what the situation, no matter what we are waiting for, no matter how hurt we are, no matter what decisions we make, it all comes down to that word, “trust”.  So tell me, do you like to take things into your own hands, or do you trust God?

As I was reading today’s passage I had to smile.  If we are honest, we have to admit we have all done something to try to cause that “chance” rendezvous.  I can’t say I have joined a ministry to be closer to a man I was interested in, or that I have switched churches to find a more singles-rich environment, but yes, I have lingered at times, hoping for a chance to say hello or have a conversation.  I have also gone to an event because there was more of a chance that there would be single males there, even if I weren’t 100% interested in the event itself.

I struggle with “putting myself out there”.  To say there is a shortage of single men in my church would be an understatement.  As I sit here and think about it, there are probably less than 10 men that would be appropriate for me to even consider as a possibility (and that may be being generous) and if I am not involved in church activities, I am involved in my son’s activities, which means even if I am around men, they are married dads.  So yes, sometimes I wonder how I will ever meet someone if I am never around single Christian men.  That is when I can fall into the trap of taking things into our own hands.

The hard part, for me, is knowing what is walking in faith, and what is taking things into my own hands.  Is going to an event I am not totally sold on walking in faith, because I need to give God opportunities and sitting in my house or at my singles starved church won’t do that?  Or is it taking things into my own hands because it’s not something I would have normally chosen to attend and I am trying to force God’s hand?

Another time this question comes up for me is when the topic of online dating comes up.  Some (married) friends have asked me whether I have considered doing e-Harmony or another Christian dating site.  Cost aside, I have the same questions.  Is that really having faith in God if I go onto these sites, or am I trying to speed up a process that God may already have in place that has nothing to do with the computer?  Is it opening myself up to temptations when I should be focusing somewhere else?  Or will God use this method to give me the man He has been preparing for me?   How do we know?  We need to check our hearts.

The last part of the passage really made me think.  How is your heart preparation?  When we get ready for church, or a singles event, or a small group, whatever it is, and you know “he” or “they” will be there, do you spend as much time preparing your heart, like Ruth, as you do preparing your physical appearance, like Orpah?  I can humbly and honestly say I never even thought of doing something like that.  I make sure I shower, do my hair, makeup, try to find a cute outfit, the whole deal.  I have never taken even 10 minutes to spend praying and talking to God.  Think about the difference that might make.  Not only will we look cute, but our heart is softened and opened to the will of God.

When we talk to someone at church, maybe we won’t be thinking about saying the right thing, we will know that God will give us the right words.  How does that sound?  Instead of wondering if we should be spending time with this man, we will be open to the nudging of the spirit and He will let us know if we are where we belong.  Don’t we want a man that is interested in more than what we have on the outside? I am reminded of the quote, “A woman’s heart should be so hidden in Christ that a man should have to seek Him first to find her.” Well then ladies, I urge you, spend just as much time preparing your inside as you do preparing your outside.  Then you will be amazingly beautiful to the man God has for you.

Let’s Pray
Lord I ask You to work on our hearts today.  We may not always have the purest of motives, even when we think we do.  But You know.  You know what is in our hearts.  According to Your word “All a man’s ways seem innocent to him, but motives are weighed by the Lord” (Proverbs 16:2).  Help us to discern our true motives when we make the choices we do.  We want to have a heart like You, and we need You to help us with that.  Help us to trust You, to truly believe that Your plans are the best plans for us.  Through the tough situations, the waiting, the hurts, the hard choices, help us to know You are there for us and, as always, have only the best intentions for us.  We love You Lord and want Your will for us.  Amen.

Your Assignment:
Please leave a comment below about chance rendezvous that you have tried to create.

 

Thoughts to ponder:

Have you ever made a major decision based on finding a mate?  If so, what was the outcome?  How about the little things we do?  Share some experiences you have had.

When getting ready to go somewhere do you spend as much time on heart preparation as you do on physical preparation?  If so, have you seen a difference?  Is this a new concept for you?  If it is, do you intend on making any changes?

God bless,

Michelle

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If you are interested in joining us in this Online Bible Study, click on the “Sign-Up Here” button at the top of the page, and follow the instructions.  Once we receive your request, you will be added to a group.

 

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Lady In Waiting: New Friends / New Surroundings / New Faith

October 3, 2012 by

 

Today’s lesson is brought to you by Tonya Ellison – GCH Singles Ministry

I want to be a woman of God. I want my thoughts and actions to glorify Him. I want to find my worth in Him before I look for that love and validation in any other person. I want to develop a relationship with Him before I invest time into any other relationship. How do I fully embrace this?
When I started reading this book last week I came up with a little saying on these three sections:

 

Person, Place and Faith

(because faith is more than just a thing)

New friends (person):  Who am I allowing to influence me?  How many times have I found myself spending time with friends and something just didn’t feel right? I’ve been in seasons in my life where I have to stand back and ask God and myself “How did I get here? What’s the deal? And to be perfectly honest I didn’t consider my friends to be part of the problem. I’m grown, I’m not doing what they’re doing, and I’m just there spending time with them.  I’m not letting them control my thoughts or actions either.

I was wrong. Like the authors said, I wasn’t spending time with other Christian women who encouraged me to live my life for God, women who “spurred” me forward on my journey.  My friends weren’t necessarily pulling me down but they weren’t pushing me forward either.

I’m not sure if you’ve experienced this but being a Christian woman in today’s society isn’t always going to make you the most popular person in the group. I found myself looking the other way and ignoring the behaviors of my friends because I didn’t want to lose them as friends and because I didn’t want them to look at me differently, mainly because I didn’t want to feel alone.

“Do not be deceived: Bad company corrupts good morals”

1 Corinthians 15:33

New Surroundings (Places):  I have to ask God where He wants me to be. Like the example in the book it can be something as minor as a choice between two activities, or something as big as a move across states. He has places picked out for us, whether it is a church, a job or a home. He knows where He wants us.

Surroundings pt. 2: Culture. The culture we find ourselves in today is not always the most growth producing place to be. I have to ask myself on a daily basis if I am reflecting a “Christ-like culture, or am I molding to the culture of the world? I understand how hard it is to not do as others do.

We need to reflect His culture;

we need to be influenced by his behavior.

New Faith:  “…devoting as much energy to Jesus as I would in a relationship with a boyfriend.”  Wow! I want to devote more to Him than I would, my husband, my kids, my job, my friends, more than everything. Without a true relationship with Him, without a true journey with Him, I am not going to become the woman He destined me to be.

I have to give Him my all

before I can give any part of me to anyone or anything else.

So, what does this all mean to me? I need to look at who I spend time with, where I spend my time, and my willingness and readiness to place all of my faith in God and focus on my relationship with Him.

Who and what am I allowing to stand in the way of my reckless abandonment?

Let’s Pray:
Lord, I pray that you open our eyes and our hearts to the new things we need in our lives. The new areas that will allow us to grow in your love and to be the women you destined us to be. Please help us to love our friends who have not broken their alabaster box at your feet without allowing them to influence our thoughts and actions. Please help us to seek your will when it comes to where we need to be, where we need to work, worship, live. Lord please give us strength when we walk our journey with you, when we choose your culture over the culture of the world. Thank you for your grace in this journey. Thank you for your hand on our lives as we strive towards reckless abandonment.  In Jesus’ name Amen.

Your Assignment:

In the comment section below, please answer the following questions:  What do you look for in friends? What do you do, or does a friend do for you in regards to encouraging growth, and a stronger relationship with God?

And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.

Hebrews 10:24

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If you would like to take part in our Online Bible Study Facebook Discussion Group, please click on the Sign-Up Here button located at the top of our website, in the Menu Bar.  Once we receive your request, we will add you to our group!

 

Blessings,

Tonya

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