November 28, 2024

Lady In Waiting: Fit for a King

October 24, 2012 by

 

And Isaac went out to meditate in the field in the evening; and he lifted his eyes and looked, and there, the camels were coming. Then Rebekah lifted her eyes, and when she saw Isaac she dismounted from her camel … Then Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah’s tent; and he took Rebekah and she became his wife, and he loved her.

Genesis 24: 63-64, 67

 

Ahhh, so this is where Disney gets it from?

As little girls we learn to be princesses from Cinderella, or Sleeping Beauty, my daughter is learning from Mulan, and Tiana (Princess and the Frog). I honestly never thought to look at the Bible and the stories of Ruth and Rebekah as how-to guides on my journey to being a princess. But, the creative minds at Disney were not far off from the example of what makes a good Princess. They are always kind, willing to help and always seem to want to do what’s best. I am willing to go as far as to say that some of them pulled the characteristics of some of the best selling princesses from the bible.

Ruth and Rebekah were hard working, king, selfless, sought to do what was right, and were both examples of a virtuous woman. I’m not saying that God is necessarily asking you to haul water for strange men, or glean off of the field, but He is asking us to display his characteristics now while we are ladies in waiting, so that these characteristics will be second nature to us in what God has planned for us.

He doesn’t just want and expect this. He gave us guides on how to be the princesses he destined us to be.

A great how-to guide on being a princess is Proverbs 31. God tells us step by step how we can live to become that princess.  The commonality between the Proverbs 31 woman, Ruth, and Rebekah is that all three fully allowed God to move in their lives without trying to stop Him.  They allowed Him to create a Christ likeness within them that shown brighter than their outward appearance could ever have.

God gave Boaz to Ruth.
God gave Isaac to Rebekah.
And God showed how much the Proverbs 31 woman’s husband and children loved and respected her.

There are things and people God wants to place in our lives, but first He wants to prepare us for the futures He has planned out for us.  Every little girl dreams of being a princess on some level, as that little girl grows up that dream doesn’t often fade, it may go to the back of the dreams pile but it remains. God is telling us that we are his princesses, and He is preparing us for our Prince; but we are responsible as well. We are responsible for opening our hearts and minds and allowing God to work in us, we are responsible to being Christ-like.

To be honest I was far from these three women in these examples. I believe that God was preparing me for marriage before I married my husband, but I don’t think that I fully accepted what god was doing until after I was married, and until after I felt the pains of a lack of preparation. I didn’t truly surrender myself to God to allow Him to mold me into the princess He created me to be until after I said “I do”, until after I saw how lack of preparation on my part can affect a marriage, and myself. I thank God every day that He continued to prepare me and that He continues to prepare me.

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Let’s Pray:
Father, thank you! Thank you for making us royalty, thank you for not simply expecting something of us, but showing us how to be the virtuous women you destined us to be, thank you for your examples.  Thank you for continuing to sustain and strengthen us on our journeys as ladies in waiting.  Please continue to prepare us, and mold us. You have our “happily ever after”, we don’t know what it is, but we do know that it is from you and that it is good. Thank you for this time in our lives.  In Jesus’ name, Amen

Your Assignment:
Read through the stories of Ruth, Rebecca, and the Proverbs 31 woman, what Christ-like characteristics do you see that we as princess possess.  What characteristics have you been blessed with? What characteristics are you praying for to be strengthened?

** Remember God isn’t asking that we be a perfect princess; it takes work, preparation and his grace and mercy. It’s a life long journey.

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 For the “Lady In Waiting” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

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Winning Him Without Words: It’s Not About Us

October 23, 2012 by

Keep praying, keep believing, and then pray some more.

—  Dineen Miller

The Lord revealed something to me this past week that showed me how vital our prayers really are.

Are you ready for a quick Bible study lesson? Turn to Daniel chapter 10.

Although I think it is beneficial to read the whole chapter for context, I specifically want to focus on verses 12 and 13.

Then he {the angel} said, “Don’t be afraid, Daniel. Since the first day you began to pray for understanding and to humble yourself before your God, your request has been heard in heaven. I have come in answer to your prayer. But for twenty-one days the spirit prince of the kingdom of Persia blocked my way. Then Michael, one of the archangels, came to help me, and I left him there with the spirit prince of the kingdom of Persia. (Daniel 10:12-13, NLT, emphasis mine)

Daniel prayed here on Earth and Scripture tells us that his request was heard in heaven. God sent an angel to deliver a message in answer to his prayer. But between Heaven and Earth, a spiritual battle took place. An evil angel blocked God’s angel until Michael, one of the higher ranking archangels, came to help. It took 21 days for God’s angel to get to Daniel to deliver the message.

God places a very high value on answering our prayers. For most of us with an unbelieving spouse, it may seem as if it is pointless to pray because we do not see any result in our spouse. And, hey, we prayed once a while back for his salvation, so God should already be working on it, right? Yes, but these prayers may spark supernatural battles that we are not even aware of! Therefore, we should be in constant, persistent prayer for our husbands. If Daniel had stopped praying, he could have missed out on the blessing he received.

This passage brought me to tears when I first read it. To realize that there is a supernatural battle waging for my husband’s soul is not to be taken lightly. These verses reiterate how important it is to pray for our unbelieving spouse diligently, without ceasing. We cannot be saddened or disheartened if we do not see a change in our husbands’. God is doing His work in our spouse. Our job is to continue to pray.

As Dineen says, prayer is truly a journey. As we walk our own journeys of faith, prayer connects us with our Father and opens our hearts to what He has for us. It strengthens us and prepares us for the next step in our life journey. So, draw close to your Father as you pray for your unbelieving husband. Trust Him to answer those prayers in His perfect timing. Trust that He is fighting those spiritual battles for us and He is already VICTORIOUS!

*****

Let’s Pray:

Lord, thank you for your Word and for teaching us through your Holy Spirit. Help us to become prayer warriors for our unbelieving spouses and to draw strength from you as we continue to walk this unequally yoked journey. In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.

Your Assignment:

Comment below answering the following question – Do you find it difficult to pray for your unbelieving spouse? Why or why not? My challenge to you today is to write out a prayer for your spouse and tuck it into your Bible (you don’t have to post it here)!

*****

For the “Winning Him Without Words” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

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Winning Him Without Words: Our Deepest Need

October 22, 2012 by

Ladies, this blog today was extremely difficult for me to share with you and the world as I have never been one to be so transparent about my life, so I pray that God would use this to reach someone out there that must need to hear it, to be encouraged from it.

When you were a teenager did you make this statement to one of your girlfriends, “I found the man of my dreams, my soulmate”  I did that when I met my man.  I wanted so much to graduate high school and get married and have someone else meet my needs that I didn’t feel were being met at home.     When I met my guy at high school,  I thought right then OK there is no one else for me, he is “the one” for me.  I never dated anyone but him.  At that time I was not a Christian so I didn’t know anything about seeking “the man” God wanted for my life, I was strictly going with “my feelings, my wants, and my desires.”   A strong desire to “get married” and get out of my home.    My parents were having marital problems and I just wanted to get out of all that was going on, so I kept putting myself into this dating relationship more and more so I kept my mind off of what was going on in my home.

We dated for four years and the day he asked me to marry him was “wonderful”.  I thought YAY, now my needs will finally be met.  I will get something that I want.  I did not truly know at that time what my “deepest need” really was nor did I know that he was not the one who would meet it.

I thought I was Cinderella and all my dreams I had ever had were gonna finally come to fruition…..but ladies this was only the beginning of what would be coming to pass in my life.

Wedding plans were being made…

A new job was provided for us both…

A home was found for us to move into…

We both were attending church at the time…

my dream life, my needs were coming together…..or so I thought

I thought this man was going to be my knight in shining armor, the one that would give me “everything” I had always wanted and needed. I talked myself into believing that, into believing in him to solely take charge of that area, “to provide me with “every need” (and wants by the way)…..he had a good job making money like I had never experienced in our home before.  Ladies I had NEEDS and I just knew he was the one to “provide”.

I had need for:

  • Acceptance – knowing that I was loved and needed by him
  • Identity – knowing that I was significant to someone
  • Security – knowing that there was someone to protect and provide for me
  • Purpose – knowing that I have a reason for living

I was spending my life trying to get my needs met by many sources and at this time in my life I was totally focused on my boyfriend to do that for me, by marrying me.

In the year before we were married I began going to church more and learning more about God and I was beginning to understand that there was someone else who could meet “my true need”.

THE NEED OF SALVATION

 

I finally realized that no human being could meet “my deepest need”, that only God could.   I was placing a lot of expectations on my boyfriend soon to be husband to take on that role and he could not do it.

Only God could meet my needs I had (acceptance, identity, security and purpose).   In John 6:35 Jesus says to me “I am the bread of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry and he who believes in me will never be thirsty.”

Ladies, Jesus had the ability to give me the spiritual food and drink that I needed to “satisfy” my longings, my needs.  He invited me to come to him for my need to be met.

On April 17, 1979 I accepted His invitation to do just that and oh how my life changed.    I “finally” had someone who could and wanted to meet “my every need”, not just the wants I was experiencing before this day.    I still did not understand that I needed to seek God for the man I was to spend my life with, I mean I had been dating for 4 years and my wedding was planned and the wedding day was approaching, was I really suppose to put all that on hold until I had time to “seek Him” for answers, well since I didn’t truly know all that, I kept going with all the plans as they were and we were married on June 23, 1979.

We continued to attend church together and God was meeting my needs.   I was growing but “we” were not growing in Him.  I was still expecting my husband to meet needs that I wanted met.  I was placing expectations on my husband that he could not uphold—you see my “deepest need” would then and always only be met by God, so I need to keep these areas separate and allow God to meet the needs He will meet and my husband to meet the needs he can meet as they are not the same ladies.

I needed to release my husband from the job that was God’s. God can heal us, love us in the way we need.

Man’s love is natural.

God’s love is supernatural.

Our husbands can’t possibly take on a role that was not his to begin with and if we try to “make” him do it he will begin to feel like a failure and resentment will begin to creep in and threaten our relationship.

 Pg. 70-71; When our expectations are rightly placed in the One who created those needs in the first place we will discover freedoms in our marriage that allows us to be the woman God created each of us to be and the wife He needs us to be so that He can work through us to reach our husband. The burden is taken off our man, as is the label of failure. We can then respect our husband as he is and love him unconditionally.

I am happy to say I have been married 33 years, but sad to say I have just recently realized in the past year that I can’t force my husband to join me at church and in “my relationship” with God because he has to find those things on his own, but what I can do is pray for him and pray for us and:

“look only to God to meet our needs”

My man is my man and I want him as much today as I did back in high school and I have hope, joy, peace, trust and respect in Him and I need him every day, but to need him,    I NEED GOD FIRST because it is God who will indeed meet the deepest places in “our marriage”.

 

Let’s Pray:  God I thank you for meeting my every “need” since that day I met you and I pray for each lady who reads part of my short testimony today that if they have that same “need” to meet you as their provider that they too will say yes and release their “guy” from trying to be the one to meet it, but allow You to be their true provider in their life, in your name I pray Amen!

Your assignment:  Who is meeting your deepest need? On a daily basis, on whom do you rely the most and to whom do you go to first to get your deepest need met?   Tell us about it….

 

 

For the “Winning Him Without Words” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

Please email Christi@girlfriendscoffeehour.com if you have any questions, or if you have a private comment that you would like to forward to one of our bloggers in regards to their post that day.

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Winning Him Without Words: Know the Essentials

October 21, 2012 by

 “Then why do you treat him any differently now?

Treat him as if he were a Christian.”  

OUCH!  I wonder how many of us have ever had this epiphany!?!  Men need respect … while women need love.  We women know that we need love.  It makes us feel secure in our relationship.  But have we really truly thought of what respect means to our husband?  As Dineen said, “some even equate respect with love.”

Having respect for our husband means treating him with the utmost kindness. Treat him as you want to be treated.  Do you treat your husband with the utmost kindness; or the way you want to be treated?  Do you let your husband take the lead in the household?  Do you belittle your husband in front of others?  Do you laugh at him in front of others?  Do you add to the stress that he already has? Do you nag him?

God calls us to respect our husbands.  He doesn’t tell us to respect our husband only IF he does this or that; only if he is a good father; only if he is a good provider; only if he shows you love, and so on.  He simply tells us to respect him….period!

Respecting your husband simply put, means that you have chosen to obey God.  When you obey God by respecting your husband, you are showing honor to God!  God never called you to nag your husband.  In fact, in Proverbs 21:9 tells us that it’s better to live on the corner of a roof than to share a house with a nagging wife.  Proverbs 21:19 tells us that it’s better to live in a wilderness than with a nagging and hot-tempered wife.

From there, we move into the section of the book that talks about our needs.  We have such a way of putting such high demands on our spouse to meet our needs that it’s impossible for him to meet them all!  Then we get frustrated, disappointed, or angry, that he isn’t able to meet these needs. First off, your spouse was never made to meet your every need!  Only God can do that!  Once you figure this out, it takes the pressure off of you both!  You are no longer disappointed in him for not meeting your needs; and he is no longer working so hard trying to figure out how to please you!!  Win-Win Situation for you both!  Praise God!

The one thing that really stood out to me in this chapter though, is the section that talked about his salvation and praying for your husband.  I know how important his salvation is to you.  But I want to ask you something.  I want you to really think about this, too.

“Would you rather your husband have a ‘forced’ relationship with God because you forced him into this with your nagging? Or would you rather he have the kind of relationship that allows him to love the Lord with his whole heart, soul, mind, and strength?” 

I really want you to think about this question today.  The rest of this chapter goes into a lot more things for us to think about, and I don’t want to take away from our awesome ladies who will be blogging the rest of the week.  So with that, I’m going to end my blog here today.  I hope I have given you some food for thought today.

_______________________

Here is Your Reading Assignment this Week:

Oct 22 –

Know the Essentials / Our Deepest Needs – Beverly

 Oct 23 –

It’s Not About Us – Jennifer

 Oct 24 –

To Know & Be Known – Donna

 Oct 25 –

God Is the Wild Hope Maker – Sarah

 Oct 26 –

Glue to Hope, Joy, & Peace / Discovery / Prayer – Martha

Don’t Forget! Saturdays with Shandy!

Shandy is taking us through a 6-week journey to prepare our homes for the Holidays!

______________________

Let’s Pray:

Father, thank You so much Lord for loving us the way You do.  Thank You Lord for the spouse you have given each of us.  Lord, allow us to see him through Your eyes.  Allow our hearts to love him the way You do.  Put a guard over our tongue this week Lord, and help us to watch the words that come out of our mouth.  Lord, help us to truly be the kind of wife that You designed us to be for the spouse You have given us. In Jesus’ Name, AMEN!

_________________

 God bless you,

.

.

.

________________

For the “Winning Him Without Words” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

Please email Christi@girlfriendscoffeehour.com if you have any questions, or if you have a private comment that you would like to forward to one of our bloggers in regards to their post that day.

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Saturdays with Shauna: Photography! Part 1

October 20, 2012 by

PHOTOGRAPHY

 

This week I thought I’d start a mini-series and share something with you that is near and dear to my heart.  Some of you may know that I used to run a part-time portrait photography business a few years ago and I still love to take pictures even though I’ve closed the business.  Photography is something I feel we take for granted now that we have digital cameras and the ability to take as many pictures as we want… some of you may remember the days of film when we had 24 or 36 shots to a roll and we were much more discerning in what we deemed photo worthy.  Then we had to wait anywhere from an hour to a week to see the prints!  These days, we come back from vacation with 2,000 digital photos to sort through and many of them never even see print.  It’s such a shame that treasures like this end up living on our computer or camera cards instead of in frames on our walls so they can be enjoyed.

In my opinion, photography is the greatest invention of mankind; it is truly a gift from God that we are able to preserve our memories and the faces of our loved ones for future generations.  I would like to share some of my thoughts and tips with you in the next few weeks on getting great shots that you and your family will treasure in the years to come and also how to get those images into frames and albums so they can be appreciated.  I also want to show you how to archive and manage your digital media so you don’t lose your images in the event of a hard drive crash.

Me with my parents a LONG time ago 🙂

 Week 1 – Getting the Shots!

First of all, you have to actually take pictures!  Some of us get busy and forget and we let months or years go by without really taking any photos, except maybe at functions like graduations and weddings.  Especially if you have little ones, pets, and elderly people in your lives, you really need to make an intentional effort to take photos of them often.  Little ones don’t stay little for long and sadly, pets and elderly relatives aren’t getting any younger.  I don’t mean to be Debbie Downer, but having lost all of my grandparents by the time I was 19, my dad when I was 21, then my mom when I was 27, along with my father-in-law in 2006 and our beloved toy poodle, Ginger, last year, I find myself wishing all the time that I had taken more photos of all of them.

Here are some ways you can be intentional (there’s that word again!) about taking photos of your loved ones for posterity:

Look at every day as a photo opportunity!  You don’t have to wait for a family get together or a holiday, just take photos!  In your backyard, in the living room, at the park, whatever.  Especially if you have young children – they change and grow up fast so you really need to make it a point to take photos of them often.  Use your camera or your smart phone if you have to, but just make sure to get the shots.

My son, Gunnar, having dinner one night at home <3

Create your own “family photo days”.  Schedule a day and take your family to a scenic venue for some family photos.  Do it once a month or once a year, it doesn’t matter – just do it.

My sister-in-law (at the time), me, and my brother… love that 70’s film look! lol

Use the holiday season and family get togethers to take photos.  Maybe you don’t see Aunt Judy but once a year at the family reunion.  Make sure to take a photo of her!  Maybe with the birth of a new baby there’s now five generations alive in the family – get them together for a group shot.  Maybe Great Grandma is celebrating her 97th birthday – get a picture of her blowing out her candles.  Or Uncle Joe flew in from Timbuktu for Christmas this year.  You get the picture (pun intended 😉 )

Get in the shot!  Maybe you’re like me and you abhor photos of yourself.  You avoid the camera at all costs and make jokes about breaking the camera lens when someone forces you to pose for them.  Quit it!  Your kids and their kids and so on and so forth, will treasure photos of you one day.  Get out from behind the camera once in awhile and get in the shot.  Use a tripod and your camera’s self-timer or give the camera to someone else.  Your loved ones won’t care about how bad you think you look in the picture, they will cherish photos of you regardless of what you looked like.

Our toy poodle, Ginger, who passed away in February 2012

Don’t forget Fido!  Our pets are like family too and they have a much shorter life span than we do.  Sometimes we neglect taking their photo because they’re always around.  But unfortunately, your beloved pet won’t be around forever.  Be sure to take plenty of photos, even if it’s just a picture of the dog lying on the couch.  One day you’ll be glad you did.

Next week, I’ll have some basic tips for you on taking better pictures!  In the meantime, your homework assignment is to take some photos this weekend!  Be sure to share some of them on our Facebook Fellowship page and comment below and tell us about your experience! 🙂

Filed Under: Singles Tagged With: , , , , ,

Lady in Waiting: Chance Rendezvous

October 16, 2012 by

It all comes down to trust.  It seems to always come down to trust, doesn’t it?  No matter what the situation, no matter what we are waiting for, no matter how hurt we are, no matter what decisions we make, it all comes down to that word, “trust”.  So tell me, do you like to take things into your own hands, or do you trust God?

As I was reading today’s passage I had to smile.  If we are honest, we have to admit we have all done something to try to cause that “chance” rendezvous.  I can’t say I have joined a ministry to be closer to a man I was interested in, or that I have switched churches to find a more singles-rich environment, but yes, I have lingered at times, hoping for a chance to say hello or have a conversation.  I have also gone to an event because there was more of a chance that there would be single males there, even if I weren’t 100% interested in the event itself.

I struggle with “putting myself out there”.  To say there is a shortage of single men in my church would be an understatement.  As I sit here and think about it, there are probably less than 10 men that would be appropriate for me to even consider as a possibility (and that may be being generous) and if I am not involved in church activities, I am involved in my son’s activities, which means even if I am around men, they are married dads.  So yes, sometimes I wonder how I will ever meet someone if I am never around single Christian men.  That is when I can fall into the trap of taking things into our own hands.

The hard part, for me, is knowing what is walking in faith, and what is taking things into my own hands.  Is going to an event I am not totally sold on walking in faith, because I need to give God opportunities and sitting in my house or at my singles starved church won’t do that?  Or is it taking things into my own hands because it’s not something I would have normally chosen to attend and I am trying to force God’s hand?

Another time this question comes up for me is when the topic of online dating comes up.  Some (married) friends have asked me whether I have considered doing e-Harmony or another Christian dating site.  Cost aside, I have the same questions.  Is that really having faith in God if I go onto these sites, or am I trying to speed up a process that God may already have in place that has nothing to do with the computer?  Is it opening myself up to temptations when I should be focusing somewhere else?  Or will God use this method to give me the man He has been preparing for me?   How do we know?  We need to check our hearts.

The last part of the passage really made me think.  How is your heart preparation?  When we get ready for church, or a singles event, or a small group, whatever it is, and you know “he” or “they” will be there, do you spend as much time preparing your heart, like Ruth, as you do preparing your physical appearance, like Orpah?  I can humbly and honestly say I never even thought of doing something like that.  I make sure I shower, do my hair, makeup, try to find a cute outfit, the whole deal.  I have never taken even 10 minutes to spend praying and talking to God.  Think about the difference that might make.  Not only will we look cute, but our heart is softened and opened to the will of God.

When we talk to someone at church, maybe we won’t be thinking about saying the right thing, we will know that God will give us the right words.  How does that sound?  Instead of wondering if we should be spending time with this man, we will be open to the nudging of the spirit and He will let us know if we are where we belong.  Don’t we want a man that is interested in more than what we have on the outside? I am reminded of the quote, “A woman’s heart should be so hidden in Christ that a man should have to seek Him first to find her.” Well then ladies, I urge you, spend just as much time preparing your inside as you do preparing your outside.  Then you will be amazingly beautiful to the man God has for you.

Let’s Pray
Lord I ask You to work on our hearts today.  We may not always have the purest of motives, even when we think we do.  But You know.  You know what is in our hearts.  According to Your word “All a man’s ways seem innocent to him, but motives are weighed by the Lord” (Proverbs 16:2).  Help us to discern our true motives when we make the choices we do.  We want to have a heart like You, and we need You to help us with that.  Help us to trust You, to truly believe that Your plans are the best plans for us.  Through the tough situations, the waiting, the hurts, the hard choices, help us to know You are there for us and, as always, have only the best intentions for us.  We love You Lord and want Your will for us.  Amen.

Your Assignment:
Please leave a comment below about chance rendezvous that you have tried to create.

 

Thoughts to ponder:

Have you ever made a major decision based on finding a mate?  If so, what was the outcome?  How about the little things we do?  Share some experiences you have had.

When getting ready to go somewhere do you spend as much time on heart preparation as you do on physical preparation?  If so, have you seen a difference?  Is this a new concept for you?  If it is, do you intend on making any changes?

God bless,

Michelle

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If you are interested in joining us in this Online Bible Study, click on the “Sign-Up Here” button at the top of the page, and follow the instructions.  Once we receive your request, you will be added to a group.

 

Filed Under: Singles Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Winning Him Without Words: Stay Connected

October 14, 2012 by

 

1 Corinthians 13: 4-7

 4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

__________________________________________

 

Well, how did the first two chapters go for you?  Are you ready to move forward and learn more about making your unequally yoked marriage thrive?  I am!!  Let’s get to it!

In this Chapter, Lynn walks us through different ways that we can stay connected to our husbands.  In the beginning of this chapter, she talks about how putting together a Fantasy Football Team gave her something in common with her husband.  I admit I haven’t been that much into football, or any other sport for that matter. But there are things that my husband and I do like to do together; riding motorcycles, movies, reading, playing cards, trying new restaurants, trying new foods and recipes, and more.

A little over five months ago, we turned off our television. Yes, shut it off!  We even had the cable turned off!  We had discussed this for a couple of years, but he was never really ready to give it a try.  But one day he brought it back up again, and I jumped at the chance.  I called the cable company and asked them to turn off our cable.  We looked at each other and said, “Well, Now What????”  🙂

From there, the only time we watched television was if the two of us wanted to sit down and watch a movie.  Netflix has some fun programs that we enjoyed watching, as well; like Myth Busters, or How It’s Made; both fun and interesting shows.

We weaned ourselves away from the television, and began to find new things to do together.  We began to explore new books.  We got into the reading the bible more.  We learned how to play new card games, or board games.  We went for more walks. We TALKED more!! That was a big one!!

During these five months, we grew together.  We learned more about each other.  We learned each others Love Language.  We spent more quality time together.  During our meals, we sat at the table and talked, instead of in front of the television without speaking a word to each other!  It was amazing what was happening in our marriage!

If you do not know what your spouse’s Love Language is, please click HERE for an online test.  HE WILL NEED TO TAKE THIS QUIZ.  It will be well worth it,Ladies, to learn his love language!!  His love language will speak directly to his heart!  Win-Win situation!  You will also see other quizzes for wives, children, teens, and singles!  Excellent site!

About a week ago, we decided that with winter months coming on board, and football season starting, we would turn the television back on; but we both agreed that it was not going to become the idol that it had been in our home before.  It would not become the thing that divided us, or took away our quality time!

It was funny when we turned the television back on and hooked it up to the antenna…we flipped through a few channels and said “Eh, nothing really on…so now what do you want to do?”  LOL  It wasn’t like before, where we would flip through the channels and even if we couldn’t find something worthy of watching, we would watch it anyway just to have something to do!!  That will not happen again!

We gained a lot during this time without our television, and we are determined not to let a stupid little box divide our relationship again!

I love my husband.  I know he loves me, too.  We want our marriage to be successful.  So we are determined in finding ways that we can make our marriage even better.  It isn’t a bad marriage, in any way!  Don’t get me wrong!  But I believe that every marriage has room for improvement, no matter how good it is!!  All it takes is a little work, creativity, and the determination to do it.  Whether it’s turning off the television, or creating a fantasy football league, or ??? … ask the Lord what will bring your marriage to a higher level, and then be intentional about it!!  Your marriage is worth it!

This week’s chapter has a whole lot more to offer you than what I’ve shared here.  Lynn covers some pretty awesome topics!  Be sure to spend the time that you need in this chapter.  I believe it is truly going to open your eyes in so many ways!!

 

Your Reading Assignment

Oct 15 – 1 Cor 13:4-7 – Love Is a Lifetime – Beverly

Oct 16 – All Things Are Not Equal – Jennifer

Oct 17 – Bring On the Bedroom – Donna

Oct 18 – When You Don’t Agree – Sarah

Oct 19 – Discovery / Prayer – Martha

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Let’s Pray:

Lord, I pray for each women that reads our blog posts this week.  I pray that each woman would be given creative ideas to stay connected with her husband.   Give us creative ideas of how we can meet our husbands needs physically, emotionally, and more.  Teach us his love language Lord. Help us to speak to him through his love language.  In Jesus’ Name, AMEN!

If you would like to join this Online Bible Study and our Facebook Discussion Group, please click on the “Sign-Up Here” button at the top of our page, and follow the instructions.  We will add you as soon as we receive your request.  🙂

God bless you,

 

Filed Under: Women's Ministry Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Lady In Waiting: Ministry of Listening, Helps, and Non-Newsy Works

October 12, 2012 by

This blog post is brought to you 

by Diane Meyers

Where is Your Glue Gun?
1 Corinthians 10:31: So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.  This verse is one of my LIFE VERSES!  When I spend time in the word, every so often I read a verse that the highlighter does not even do justice to!  These verses struck a chord in my heart, and because of that they change me.  These verses are my strength in weakness, my light in darkness, my solid ROCK when shaken; or LIFE VERSES as me and my sister like to call them!  1 Corinthians 10:31 is one that really struck me when I read it.  I’m not sure if it was because as I read it over and over again, I thought of everything that I had once done in my past that was the complete opposite of giving glory to God; or, if it was because I instantly thought of everything that I would do from that moment forward to GIVE GOD GLORY.  Probably both, this verse was my motivation and God used it to lead me to live a life full of helping others.

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Every single day I (WE) encounter broken after broken hearts.  These hearts come in all shapes, sizes, and pieces.  It is the heart of the lady you sit next to at work who cannot go home because she is her husband’s punching bag.  It is the heart of the man that you pass by at the bus stop wondering how he is going to provide for his family because at his last interview he was too experienced or just not what they are looking for.  It is the heart of the little boys and girls you hear about on the news who are ripped out of their homes and now living with temporary families.  It is the heart of the lives of every single person that you encounter who does not know their Savior in Heaven personally, that ought to make you want to grab a super-size glue gun and help fix these broken pieces.  I know I have my glue gun, all because when I look into the faces of these broken lives all I see is my old, glory-less self; the lost little girl in a big scary world.  I see the hurt behind their smile, the pain in their eyes, and I know them all too well.

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Can I ask you some things that you either will not get or crave to find out the answer to?  Where is your glue gun?  Have you been renewed from all of your hurts?  Do you know what it is like to be made new, with no broken pieces all because of the glue guns of others that God is the power source to?  If yes, don’t you want to be that glue gun to others, leading them to the only power that will heal them, help them, and restore them; Jesus Christ.  If no, be honest to God; let Him know where you need those broken pieces to be glued together again.  His glue lasts forever.

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Matthew 25:40 And the King will answer them, “Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.”  There it is, another LIFE VERSE.  That one hit me even harder, everything I have ever done to anyone I did to God.  That realization brought about a huge change in how I treat others.  Now, I still do see myself in the brokenhearted of the world, but even more so I see Jesus.  When people look at me, I want them to see Jesus, NOT ME.  This verse also helps me remember that God is with the brokenhearted, and I want to be where God is.  I have come to love my single days instead of dreading them because I get to spend them looking for Jesus, among the brokenhearted.

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There are opportunities all around me and YOU to share God’s light.  Are you sulking in your singleness that it is blinding you from taking advantage of all of the opportunities God is giving you to minister to others, and live each day with HIM (where you just so happen to be the happiest, not in a marriage)?  Being single is the perfect time to ask God to bring the brokenhearted along your path.  This is the time to spend listening to others needs instead of focusing on the one need you think you need that God has not given you yet-a husband.  This is the time to figure out your LIFE VERSES, and share them with the world.  This is the time to find that glue gun and go on a journey with God to find the broken pieces.  Don’t let what the world says about being alone and single ruin your happy.  And better yet, LET THE WORLD KNOW you are not alone, you are with God; and they can be too!

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LET’S PRAY:

Lord, I thank you so much for always shining through when I write.  I thank you for this time we have to hear from YOU.  I pray that each and every one of us that is along this journey together desire to seek your face among the brokenhearted.  I pray that you bring opportunities into our lives to help others come to know you as their personal Savior.  Lord, we love you so much, and I just pray that we learn to be happy, productive, single women, helping to FURTHER YOUR KINGDOM, give us your strength Lord.  I pray these things in your Son’s precious name, AMEN!

YOUR ASSIGNMENT:  

What are some things you have done to help others all around you?  Are there people in your life that you know God has placed in it so that you can minister HIS love to them?  What areas of helping, listening, and staying humble do you enjoy most or struggle the most with?  Please comment answers below, I CANNOT WAIT TO HEAR WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY!

Join Us!
Want to join the conversation in our Online Bible Study Facebook Discussion Group? We would love to have you, just click the Sign Up Here button at the top of this page and follow the directions. See you there!

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If you have not accepted Christ as your Lord & Savior, we would love to pray with you. Please contact our Prayer Team leader by emailing Prayer@GirlfriendsCoffeeHour.com. Someone from our prayer team will contact you soon!

Blessings,

Diane

Filed Under: Singles Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Winning Him Without Words: Throw Me a Life Preserver!

October 10, 2012 by
Jesus answered,
“I am the way and the truth and the life.
No one comes to the Father except through me.”
John 14:6
The decision I made to follow Christ was the single most life changing decision I could have made.Once I decided to follow Him I immersed myself in Him. We literally ate, drank and slept Jesus. It was a time of learning and seeking for both my husband and I. The things I learned and resolved were so freeing!
As I grew in Christ I learned to forgive. I was able to let go of the unforgiveness I had for the abuse I suffered at the hands of my parents when I was a child. That forgiveness was for me as well. I had carried it around for so long and letting go of it gave me a freedom in my heart I didn’t even know existed!! God has said the truth shall set you free and I was free indeed. So in my journey with Christ I have learned to recognize that nudge from God when I need to let something go and forgive.
Having already confessed that I am somewhat of a control freak, letting go is sometimes hard for me. I need refining and reminding just like Lynn says. Our marriage is always being refined and I think it should be. As we yield our marriage to God, he loves and shapes us into the couple who can serve Him free of all the hurts and pain we bring on each other. Our life journey is together as well as separate. We experience life and problems from our own unique perspectives.
As I yield these experiences to God and choose to let Him lead, I react in a right and godly way. My husband sees that and hopefully wants to respond that way too. We, as their wives, are a constant example of Christ to them since we live together 24/7. I’m always asking God to show me how to respond, move on and forgive if I need to, in the situations in our life. Now I’m not always successful, I fail more times than I want, but I get right back up and try again knowing God always gives me another chance. The little things I let crowd in and fester can be let go of  if I yield it to my Savior.
Twenty years ago, when I gave up looking for our new house because our supposed “dream house” fell through, I let anger take over. I left it to my husband to find us a house. He finally chose one that I hated! It had gold shag carpet, gold draperies, and brown and orange wall paper in the dining room! It was ugly! But my husband saw potential. So once again I had to choose not to be angry and let it go.
The choice to let go of the control of choosing a home for us and leave it to God and trust that my husband had made the right choice was not easy. I prayed and spent much time speaking out to God that I wanted Him to be in control. Giving it over daily was all I could do.
My husband has literally remodeled every room in the house and even built us a beautiful bedroom retreat with a balcony just for us!  Our home is beautiful thanks to God and my husband. I can praise God that he chose it and my husband for all the hard work he has put into it. God took care of my needs and our marriage too. I have found that when I hang onto God and trust him to be in control I find freedom and, to quote our author, God can change little ole me and my marriage for His glory!
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Let’s pray:
God we love you. Help us to let go of things that hold us back from making us all you want us and our marriage to be.  Free us form those strongholds that we let take over. Free us to move in our marriages just the way you want us to. Thank you Lord. In Jesus name Amen
Your assignment:
Are there things in your life, like I had in mine that hold you back in your marriage? Unforgiveness, anger, control? Let’s name some of these things and purpose to give it to God and then let’s pray for one another over them. After all the body of Christ need each other and what better way than to pray for our sisters to be free??!!
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If you are interested in joining our FREE Online Bible Study, please click on the “Sign-Up Here” button at the top of our webpage, and follow the instructions.  We’ll be glad to get you signed up!
Blessings,
Donna
Filed Under: Women's Ministry Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , ,

Lady in Waiting: Lady of Diligence, No Time to Waste and Free to Follow

October 8, 2012 by

LADY OF DILIGENCE – The perfect time to make the most of every opportunity is while you are single.

“Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is.” Ephesians 5:15-17 (NIV)

Before I got married, I used to wonder why the young married ladies of our church stopped being active in church after they said I do.   We discussed this at one of Singles Ministry meetings because it puzzled us.  How come the gifted lead singer in the choir with a beautiful Soprano could no longer usher in the presence of the Lord during the worship service?  That beautiful voice was now seated quietly in the pew opposite her husband.

I got that answer when I got married.  I realized that my time was not mine alone.  I had to consider that my husband’s needs came before my own.  I could no longer just come home, change clothes and leave for an evening meeting.  There was dinner and other things to be prepared.  Most of ministry meetings took place in the evenings and since I was at work all day, I could not be out in the evening as well.

“God has called me to live now. He wants me to realize my full potential as a man right now, to be thankful about where I am, and to enjoy it to the fullest. I have a strange feeling that the single person who is always wishing he were married will probably get married, discover all that is involved, and wish he were single again! He will ask himself, ‘Why didn’t I use that time for the Lord when I didn’t have so many other obligations? Why didn’t I give myself totally to Him when I was single?’ ”

John Fischer could easily have written the above with me in mind because as a single woman, I was so zealous for the Lord.  I grabbed every opportunity that came my way to reach out to others.  I was out of the house on Monday for Youth Meeting, Tuesday for Bible Study, Wednesday was mid-week service, Thursdays, we had Singles Ministry meetings, Friday evenings and Saturday were mine to have girlfriends over for  slumber parties, watch movies and talk all night.   Housework was also thrown in the mix.  Sunday was a day spent at church starting with teaching Sunday school, ushering in church during the main service and in the evening, community outreach.  You must be rolling your eyes just by reading this schedule but I enjoyed doing this so much.  No out of boredom but because the time was just perfect for me.

Now, to adjust all this to married life and staying at home in the evening really took some doing.  It’s a topic on its own!  I asked my husband for at least two evenings.  But overtime even the two evenings were too much until I settled for just Sundays.

“The single woman can be involved in the Lord’s work on a level that a married woman cannot because of the distractions and responsibilities of being a wife and mother. Ironically, some single women can be so distressed by their single state that they become emotionally more distracted than a wife and mother of four children.  Page 26.

It’s so easy to judge when you are seating on the other side of the table.  But when you get there you tend to appreciate things more.  I always admire a mother with children who are under 5.  To get them prepared and be on time for any activity is really work.  While I only need 45 minutes to get ready, she needs at least 2 hours or more!

Let’s end today by thinking about what Jackie and Debbie asked us.

Are you busy serving Jesus during your free time, or do you waste hours trying to pursue and snag an available guy? Ruth was a widow, but she did not use her time sponsoring pity parties for all unhappy single women to gather and compare the misery of datelessness. When she and Naomi moved back to Bethlehem, Ruth did not waste a moment feeling sorry for herself. She went right to work. Instead of being drained by her discouraging circumstances, she took advantage of them and diligently embraced each day. Page 27.

I don’t know about you but I am challenged by Ruth not to waste time anymore.  You have all the freedom to follow Christ wherever He may lead you.  I still dream of visiting India one day for missionary work!

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LET’S PRAY

Father I thank you for challenging us through the life of Ruth who did not waste time feeling sorry for herself as a widow but she did her work diligently.  Lord help us to open our eyes and see that the harvest is plenty but the laborers are few.  May we seize the opportunities that come our way so that we may joyfully serve you.   In Jesus Name. Amen.

 

YOUR ASSIGNMENT

Life is so full of traumatic situations.  Single ladies have their share of such situations.  In the comment below let’s discuss the following:

 

  1. Has someone disappointed you in the past that you feel like you cannot fully serve the Lord in any way?

  2. Have you put your life on hold and you are using this as an excuse for not serving Jesus?

 

If you would like to take part in our Online Bible Study and Facebook Discussion Group, please click on the “Sign-Up Here” button located at the top of our website, in the Menu Bar.  Once we receive your request, we will add you to our group!

 

Be Blessed,

Jackie

 

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