November 25, 2024

Winning Him Without Words: What About the Kids? Where to start?

December 10, 2012 by

Train up a child in the way he should go; and when he is old he will not turn from it.  

Proverbs 22:6

 

As we wind down this study we come to last section of this wonderful book and that is “What about our kids” in this journey of our spiritually mismatched marriage.

(what do we do? Where do we start?)

My kids were not the ones who went to church every week with two parents leading them into the church building, or praying with them, or reading the Bible with them, nope it was just me.   Now I am not complaining mind you, but it would have been “wonderful” for both of us to do the leading.

When I had children I was constantly thinking how in the world am I going to raise them in a godly home when the home was not a complete godly unit…and then I remembered how my granddaddy used to teach me saying “Beverly, there is nothing you can do about others, you must just work on yourself, love Jesus yourself, and as He teaches you then you teach them.”

I listened to him and just like I did the 9 years of my marriage before having children I did the same after the children were born……I went to church and took my children with me so they could learn about my Jesus, and learn about WHO will be and make the difference in their life as they grow up.

Even though I took them to church I constantly thought:

  • Am I doing things right
  • Am I teaching them the truth
  • Will they accept Jesus as Savior one day
  • Will they learn to be a prayer warrior
  • Will they love Jesus
  • Will they wake each morning with a desire to live every moment for Him
  • Will they seek a godly mate for their life
  • Will they love God’s Word and want to spend time getting to know Him

My children were learning about God and getting to know Him…both accepted Christ as Savior and then the first big day came when my daughter left for college and then all those same thoughts began creeping back in my head…..except a few different ones…now my thoughts were:

  • Will she remember what she learned growing up
  • Will she stick to the truth in this world of peer pressure
  • Will she not give in to the idea of dating just anyone but continue her commitment to seeking God for her life mate
  • Will she still remain in God’s Word

Oh so many thoughts were swirling around in my head and I could not seem to get enough of wanting to know that she was not straying from the path she was taught.

Then I got the call…the phone call….Mamma I met this guy that I really like….go to the school BCM website and look at his picture….he is so cute Mamma….and I told her hmmmm….let me take a look and so I did…..and my first thought was REALLY?  HIM?  (you know we all do that, those initial judgmental thoughts just based on someone’s looks)……and let me say right now……

 MY JUDGMENTAL THOUGHTS WERE WRONG

 This was the man God set aside for my girl….as her life mate….at that time he was the campus missionary at the college she attended and 3 years later they were engaged/married,  now he is the youth pastor at the church they attend…..and oh how God is moving in their life…..and just think if I had done my normal mamma meddling I would’ve been messing up God’s plan for her life.

So here we are, one child trained and on the path God set for her…..but still one more at home and still my same thoughts creeping in now for this one…

In his high school years my son began showing the same aspects as my husband (not wanting to go to church, I had to “make him go”)  and then the day came when he went off to college…..and here I go with my thoughts again…..and now these thoughts were way different from when my daughter left home….because now that he was in the thought process of “not wanting to go to church”  I knew that the peer pressure of the world would start sinking in heavy on him…..and yes that is where he is now…..NOT GOING….NOT SERVING….not following that path he had been taught as a child…..

 BUT….

 I have the wonderful promise of Proverbs 22:6 that I cling to that He will turn to it……and as he comes home for visits/holidays he sees me continuing to love and serve Jesus, he sees me living out what I taught him all the young years of his life.  He has watched me in times spent in study/devotion…..this has and is the silent witness to my son. He has heard me lifting him up in prayer to God–this is the audible witness to my son.

I await that day to see his faith has not wavered, that he remembers the training he received growing up and that he will make the Lord “priority” in his life.  And I await to see/hear when he says “yes Lord I am here ready to serve” I have not given up….

Oh, What a day that will be!

 So to answer the question of this lesson today; Where to start?   Here’s the answer from Pg. 170 of our study. Help our love for Jesus be so contagious; it can’t help but rub off on our loved ones and when our kids see us loving God in this way, they will love Him too!

 

Let’s Pray:   God I thank you for each lady that has been a part of this study and I pray that your love will seep out through our daily life in subtle effective ways that will influence our children, in your name I pray. Amen!

Your assignment:  Share any thoughts that God brought to your mind as you studied today’s lesson about our kids?

————————————————–

Our next Women’s Online Bible Study

“Crazy Love” by Francis Chan

Begins January 6, 2013.

To sign up for this new Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to learning about this “Crazy Love” with you!!

We would LOVE to have your feedback on this study! Will you take a few minutes to complete the following survey? Your responses will help us create the best online bible study experience for you! CLICK THIS LINK to fill out the short 10 question form. Your responses are completely anonymous, I promise!! Thank you so much!

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Winning Him Without Words: What About the Kids? (Weekly Reading Assignment)

December 9, 2012 by

“Your calling is simply to love this man in your life and love God with all your heart, mind, soul and strength. Leave the rest to God.” (pg. 166)

Well, ladies, we have officially read and studied through all 10 keys to thriving in a spiritually mismatched marriage! Let’s do a quick review, shall we?

Key #1: Know that You’re Not Alone!

Key #2: Don’t Save Your Husband – Save Yourself

Kay #3: Stay Connected

Key #4: Know the Essentials of Love: Hope, Joy, Peace and Trust (Oh, Yeah, and Respect)

Key #5: Believe Your Marriage is Blessed

Key #6: Trade Perfection for Authenticity

Key #7: Pick and Choose Your Battles

Key #8: Move from Hurt to Healing – Seasons of Marriage

Key #9: Keep Your Armor On – You’re at War!

Key #10: Learn When to Pray the Most Dangerous Prayer

I don’t know about you, but I have learned SO much with this study. This book is definitely one I will look back to again and again! I encourage you to read the conclusion today and then dig in to our final week starting tomorrow. I can’t believe it is almost over!

*****

The last week of our study, we are going to talk about the kids. What do you do in a spiritually mismatched home when you have children present? This has the potential to be a very touchy area in a marriage. This section of our book can be found in APPENDIX 1.

Here is our Reading Assignment for the week:

Dec 10 – Prov 22:6 – What About the Kids / Where to Start – Beverly

Dec 11 – Teachable Moments – Jennifer

Dec 12 – Start When They Are Young – Donna

Dec 13 – As They Grow – Sarah

Dec 14 – Discovery / Prayer – Martha

*****

Let’s Pray: Father God, as we go into our last week of this study, I pray that  you will open our hearts and minds to what you have for each one of us. For those of us with children or those of us blessed to have nieces and nephews or other children in our lives, Lord, we ask that you show us how to be a positive spiritual influence in their lives. I pray that you touch each child represented by every woman participating in this study and bless them as they grow into the men and women you created them to be. Help us to guide them and teach them in Your ways, Father. In Jesus precious and holy name, I pray, Amen!

*****

Our next Women’s Online Bible Study

“Crazy Love” by Francis Chan
Begins January 6, 2013.

To sign up for this Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to learning about this “Crazy Love” with you!!

We would LOVE to have your feedback on this study! Will you take a few minutes to complete the following survey? Your responses will help us create the best online bible study experience for you! CLICK THIS LINK to fill out the short 10 question form. Your responses are completely anonymous, I promise!! Thank you so much!

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Saturdays with Shandy: Christmas Edition! “Tea-Stained” Fabric

December 8, 2012 by

This week and next is a two-part project. This week I am teaching you how to make the  “tea-stained” fabric that you will need for next week’s Prim Christmas Stitcheries. This is one of my favorite craft projects to do. It’s easy, smells wonderful for years, and looks beautiful.

simplify

What You Will Need:

  • muslin fabric (I dye 1 yard at a time)
  • cheap instant coffee
  • cheap imitation vanilla extract
  • cinnamon
  • large pot
  • large cookie sheet

Directions:

  1. Fill a large pot with water (approx. 5 cups) and heat on the stove to boiling.
  2. Remove from heat and add 1/3 c. vanilla extract, 2 cups of instant coffee, and 1/4 c. cinnamon to the water.
  3. Put the fabric in the pot and let sit for an hour.
  4. If you want a “grubbier” textured fabric, you can rub cinnamon directly into the fabric as well, after you take it out of the pot.
  5. Gently wring out, then hang to dry, or place fabric on a large cookie sheet and bake on low heat (200 degrees F) for a few minutes. You will need to stand by and watch the fabric so it doesn’t burn. This is my preferred method, and it makes for a slightly stiffer fabric as well.

Tips:

  • You can make more stained fabric with the remaining mixture, or put it in a container and refrigerate to reuse later.
  • This fabric is wonderful for all sorts of craft projects, especially for those like me who love primitive country decor.
  • I buy my coffee, cinnamon, and vanilla at dollar stores. No need to spend money on good ingredients!
  • I never pay full price for fabric! The popular craft stores have apps with 40% off coupons!
  • I also dye embroidery floss to give it a muted or aged look, and just put it on a plate to dry. Works well for lace, too!
  • Use for craft fabric only, and not for garments, as it will at least partly wash out.
  • I once dyed a shower curtain in the bathtub using the mixture, leaving it in for a few hours, and it came out beautifully. I just hung it to dry! When it came time to wash it, I washed it in COLD water, and it preserved some (but not all) color.

This opens up a whole new world of crafting. Have fun with it! The possibilities are endless!

Love & Blessings,

Shandy

Be sure to visit Shandy’s personal blog Aprons ‘n Pearls for crafts, recipes, homekeeping tips & more!

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Winning Him Without Words: Weekly Review

December 7, 2012 by

 

GCH_Esther14_4


“Who is to say you have not been brought into the kingdom for such a time as this.”
(Esther 4:14)

This week, we are brought to some soul searching questions we must answer if we choose to be a part of God’s plan in helping our husband find his way to Christ.

The chapter begins with the role John the Baptist played in the life of Christ.  John was chosen to prepare the way of Christ, and not be one of the elite group of Twelve Disciples who would walk side by side Him during his ministry on earth.

As I read the role John the Baptist played, my mind raced back to a time when I felt I was being placed in a role for a bigger picture to unfold in my marriage.  Quite honestly, I didn’t want to assume that role.  But, one day Esther 4:14 caught my attention: “Who is to say you have not been brought into the kingdom for such a time as this.”

I raced to my computer and composed a poem, recalling people and, yes, even animals, in the Bible who were pre-positioned for an important role in the history of all mankind.

Who is to Say?

(Martha Bush – -November 10, 2005)


Esther, a Jewish slave, became the wife of a pagan King in the land,
Discovered that Haman wanted all the Jews destroyed by the King’s command.
But, Esther had favor with The King and Haman’s plot went amiss,
Who is to say that a slave girl wasn’t brought into the Kingdom for such a time as this?

Think of Rahab, who was called a harlot by name,
Heard about God drying up the Red Sea and bringing the Egyptians to shame.
So, she hid the Israelite spies and every wall of Jericho fell without a miss,
Who is to say that a harlot wasn’t brought into the Kingdom for such a time as this?

And then there is the donkey that stopped Balaam in his tracks,
From going the wrong way less the Israelites be cursed and attacked.
Now we might scoff at the idea of God using a donkey & say: “that idea I will dismiss,”
Who is to say that the donkey wasn’t brought into the Kingdom for such a time as this?

Let’s never forget Mary, a young virgin in her day,
Received a visit from an angel who had powerful words to say.
“You shall bring forth a son to save the world by shedding blood of His.”
Indeed, a virgin was brought into the Kingdom for such a time as this!

But wait, there were others involved in the nativity scene,
Shepherds, wise men, angels, all around the stable they leaned.
Quite unnoticed was Anna who proclaimed the redemption message in their midst,
Who is to say that an unknown woman wasn’t brought into the kingdom for such a time as this?

Now each of these people probably questioned their position from the start,
Why, even Mary pondered these things in her heart.
No doubt they even found discomfort in doing what they had been asked to do,
For example the donkey, “I’m sure he didn’t like being kicked by Balaam, would you?”

But, the Bible shows how God uses slaves, harlots, virgins, and even donkeys too,
To fulfill the plan and purpose they were created to do.
And so if I should be pre-positioned by God in a position that I would rather dismiss,
Who is to say that I, an ordinary housewife, wasn’t brought into the Kingdom for such a time as this?

************

Let’s review Sarah, Jennifer, and Donna’s points on how God prepares us, an ordinary housewife, in helping our husband find his way to Christ.  

Weekly Review

Monday:  Sarah – John the Baptist – -Sarah reviews Dineen thoughts on John The Baptist’s role and wonders if he ever felt short changed because he wasn’t chosen to be part of the Twelve men who walked with Jesus daily?  If John compared himself with the other twelve, certainly he knew he was just as capable to spread Christ’s word as they were.

Sarah confessed to comparing herself to others from junior high into her adult life. But, Sarah has discovered that: “I can be ME, Sarah Jane Boyer. And that is a great thing to be because He created ME and He has me on the path He predestined for me.

Sarah has moved herself from 2nd best into the #1 spot:  “I don’t need to compare myself to others because there is no comparison.  We are all #1 to God and all for different reasons.”  Like John The Baptist, I am content to fulfill the role God has chosen for me and I will do it with grace and honor to Him.”

May we do likewise.

Tuesday: Jennifer-Motivated By Agape Love / Crossing a Threshold

Jennifer points to a place of preparation for our role in helping our husband find his way to Christ – –Agape Love.

Agape Love is:

  • a selfless, sacrificial, unconditional form of love.
  • the love that Christ has for each one of us.
  • is based upon a decision, not a feeling

When you live out agape love, you choose to love, despite the fact you have been hurt; overlook the ways your spouse has slighted you; forgive your spouse for the way he has hurt you.

Pointed questions Jennifer ask us:

  1. Can you sacrifice your own needs, wants, and desires and truly love your husband with an agape form of love that is not based on anything other than choosing to love him like Christ loves you?
  1. Are you ready to cross the threshold and say:  “Lord, do whatever it takes to bring my husband to Christ?”
  1. What are you willing to risk for your unbelieving husband to know Jesus?

May we prayerfully consider these questions.

Wednesday: Donna – Prepared by God / Unanswered Prayers – -Donna brings out another way God prepares us for our role in bringing our husband to Christ:  TRIALS.  She points to the fact that Jesus learned obedience and submission from His sufferings.

Some of the trials we might face:

  1. Perhaps God has asked you to stay the course in your marriage through very tough circumstances.
  2. Maybe He’s asked you to show love to a man who acts unlovable
  3. Maybe you don’t feel loved by him

Donna agrees with Dineen who wrote:  “In our trials, we can look to Jesus and see the pattern of preparation, and perhaps therein lies our joy-in knowing that the Father loves us as much as He loves His Son and is preparing us for the destiny He has planned for each of us, and for our husbands.”

Thursday:  Sarah – -The Perpetual State of Waiting – -Sarah brings us to another way God prepares us for helping bring our husband to Christ: Waiting.

Why Does God Make Us Wait?

  1. The Testing Time – – Involves a good attitude
  2. The Right time – – Doing things on our own time, causes setbacks and frustration. Waiting patiently for God; all things will fall into place and run smoothly.
  3. Motivation – – God also wants to make sure our heart is right. He wants to be certain that you don’t misuse your blessings.

Sarah concludes with:

  • He is waiting on you. YES! God waits for you too!
  • He waits for you to show Him you can be patient.
  • He waits for you to show Him you will rely on Him for help when there are obstacles in your path.
  • He waits for your heart to be right.

So you see, it’s not just us that are doing all the waiting. He waits too.

 

Friday: Discovery/Prayer – Father, God, I thank you for what you have taught about the role we play in helping our husband find his way to Christ.  May we not compare ourselves with others, live in agape love, and be willing to wait for your perfect timing.    In Jesus name, I pray. Amen.

Your assignment: What do you need to do to be better prepared to help bring your husband to Christ?
_______________

Above all, if you have not accepted Christ as your Lord and Savior, and would like to have someone pray with you, please email us at Prayer@GirlfriendsCoffeeHour.com. and one of our prayer team members will contact you.

Have a blessed day,
Martha

*****

Our next Women’s Online Bible Study
“Crazy Love” by Francis Chan
Begins January 6, 2013.
To sign up for this Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to learning about this “Crazy Love” with you!!

We would LOVE to have your feedback on this study! Will you take a few minutes to complete the following survey? Your responses will help us create the best online bible study experience for you! CLICK THIS LINK to fill out the short 10 question form. Your responses are completely anonymous, I promise!! Thank you so much!

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Winning Him Without Words: The Perpetual State of Waiting

December 6, 2012 by

I wait for you, O Lord; you will answer, O Lord my God.

Psalm 38:15

Waiting is hard to do when we’ve become accustomed to instant access to just about anything we want or need. So when we are waiting in line, waiting to speak to a human when calling customer service, waiting for good news, or bad…waiting on God, we become frustrated. Because when we send a prayer request to God it’s not like sending an email or text where we can expect an answer within minutes, or even within the day. God answers prayers in His own perfect timing.  Rarely that answer will come instantly, but most of the time we will be in that perpetual state of waiting for a while.

But Why Does God Make Us Wait?

THE TEST. In my own personal experience God likes to run me through a few tests before blessing me with an answered prayer. If I am praying for something like a bigger house, He wants to make sure I can take good care of my current home first. If I am praying for a job with more responsibility, God will make sure I handle the stress of my current job before he promotes me onto something that will likely be more stressful. If I can wait for my prayers to be answered with a good attitude and prove to God that I can handle what I am asking for, I can be sure that He will answer my prayer.

THE RIGHT TIME. You may think the timing is perfect to move, to get a different job, to have another child, but is it right in God’s time? God will sometimes make you wait for answers to certain prayers because it’s just not the right time yet. He, and only He, knows the right time for you to receive your blessings. When we do things on our own time, we’ll often be hit with setbacks and tremendous frustration.  When we wait patiently for God, all things will fall into place and run smoothly.

MOTIVATION. God also wants to make sure your heart is right. What I mean by this is God would love to give you all your heart’s desire, but He also wants to be certain that you don’t misuse your blessings. If your intent of praying for more money is only so you can feel superior above others, that would be a misuse of a blessing. Praying for money to support your family or to help your community is the right motivation for a prayer of prosperity.

These are just a few reasons God puts us in that perpetual state of waiting, but I think they give you a good understanding of why God doesn’t send the answers to your prayers instantaneously.  He is waiting on you. YES! God waits for you too! He waits for you to show Him you can be patient; He waits for you to show Him you will rely on Him for help when there are obstacles in your path, He waits for your heart to be right. So you see, it’s not just us that are doing all the waiting. He waits too.

Let’s Pray:

Dear Lord, we find it so hard to wait, but we do understand that everything has to be done in your perfect timing. Help us to be patient, Lord. Help us to use our waiting period to grow closer to You. Always let us know that it is Your will that will be done, not ours. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Your Assignment:

Reflect back on a time in your life when you prayed for something, but it wasn’t answered right away. When was that prayer answered? In hindsight can you now see why God made you wait for that answered prayer?

Godspeed,

Sarah

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Our next Women’s Online Bible Study “Crazy Love” by Francis Chan, begins January 6, 2013. To sign up for this Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to learning about this “Crazy Love” with you!!

We would LOVE to have your feedback on this study! Will you take a few minutes to complete the following survey? Your responses will help us create the best online bible study experience for you! CLICK THIS LINK to fill out the short 10 question form. Your responses are completely anonymous, I promise!! Thank you so much!

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Winning Him Without Words – Prepared by God – Unanswered Prayers

December 5, 2012 by

GCH_Eph2_10

During the days of Jesus’ life on earth, He offered up prayers and petitions with loud cries and tears to the one who could save Him from death, and He was heard because of His reverent submission. Although He was a son, He learned obedience from what He suffered and, once made perfect, He became the source of eternal salvation for all who obey Him and was designated by God to be High Priest in the order of Melchizedek. Hebrews 5:7-10

Somehow, reading these verses, I feel strangely uncomfortable and comforted at the same time. I don’t know about you, but it makes me feel uncomfortable when I read that God let His son go through trials and problems so much that He offered up prayers and petitions to his Father. I mean he WAS God, why did He have to go through that? On the other hand, I find myself comforted knowing that He went through trials, just like me! And now I can send up prayers and petitions, too. I don’t think He, Jesus, actually had to go through them; he could have been born and gone through life without one problem or trial. But He chose to be like us, to show us how to pray and be an example of how God wanted to prepare us for our own battles.

I love this paragraph in our study that Dineen wrote: “In our trials, we can look to Jesus and see the pattern of preparation, and perhaps therein lies our joy-in knowing that the Father loves us as much as He loves His Son and is preparing us for the destiny He has planned for each of us, and for our husbands.”

What trials are you going through, or have gone through, in your life and marriage that you can look and see the hand of God in the midst? Perhaps God has asked you to stay the course in your marriage through very tough and heavy circumstances. Maybe He’s asked you to show love to a man who acts unlovable, maybe he’s defensive and angry. Maybe you don’t feel loved by him, but God has called you to love him as He has loved you.

God has equipped us for these and any other situations that might be presented to us on a daily basis. Let’s look at some scriptures that bear out this very thing:

* 1 Corinthians 10:13  No temptation has seized you except what is common to man and God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, He will provide a way out so that you can stand up under it. (NAS)

* 2 Timothy 3:16-17  All scripture is inspired by God and useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right. God uses it to prepare and equip his people to do every good work. (NIV)

* Ephesians 2:10  We are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus, to do good works which God prepared us in advance to do.

If we read these verses, and apply them, we know that not only is God preparing us, but He is equipping us for the battle, sometimes way ahead of it! Stay in the word, learn His way, and apply it to life. God does not say He won’t give us trials in this life.  He said we will have them, but He will help us and provide a way for us.  If the battle is short or long, He will be there for us.

We know that God hears us from the verse Dineen shared, Psalm 17:6  “I am praying to you because I know You will answer, O God. Bend down and listen as I pray” (NLT), but do we really believe it? Sometimes it seems as though God is not listening. We pray and plead and send up our petitions and it seems we’re hitting a wall. We worry that He doesn’t see our situation or hear us, but because of His word, we know He does. So we wait….

I know I’ve talked about my son and his addiction to drugs and alcohol and  rebellion before, but let me just expand on it for a moment. Tristan’s rebellion started when he was 12. He suddenly became this angry, unhappy person I didn’t know. It went on a downward spiral of drugs, alcohol, and girls. He was soon more interested in partying than school, or life. He ran away a few times, screamed that he hated me on daily basis and moved out for a time when he was 17. He only came back because he was hungry.

During this time, we prayed and prayed and prayed. God probably got tired of hearing my voice!! But hear me He did!  When Tristan turned 19 things started to change. He admitted his addiction and got help. He tells me everyday that he loves me, whether in a text or by mouth. He is 21 now and a productive member of society. He hasn’t come back to the Lord yet, but I’m still praying for that. But because we were in the word and had an active Christian life, God prepared us ahead of time for the battle. I can look back and see how God prepared me and listened to me in the heat of the battle. It was part of His plan for us. God heard me!  His timing may not have been  my time, but He was faithful. I know He is hearing my prayers now; He’s proved it to me.  He is hearing you, as well!  Rest in that.

In Christ,

Donna

Let’s Pray:

God thank You for hearing our prayers and for preparing us for the battles You allow to happen in our lives. Help us to hear You, as well . May we stay as ever faithful to You, as You are to us. In Jesus’ name we pray-Amen

Your Assignment:

Let us know the battles you are facing in your marriages and let’s us be privileged to pray for you as we all face the battlefield.

***********************

Our next Women’s Online Bible Study

“Crazy Love” by Francis Chan

Begins January 6, 2013.

To sign up for this Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to learning about this “Crazy Love” with you!!

We would LOVE to have your feedback on this study! Will you take a few minutes to complete the following survey? Your responses will help us create the best online bible study experience for you! CLICK THIS LINK to fill out the short 10 question form. Your responses are completely anonymous, I promise!! Thank you so much!

Please email Christi@girlfriendscoffeehour.com if you have any questions, or if you have a private comment that you would like to forward to one of our bloggers in regards to their post that day.

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Winning Him Without Words: Motivated By Agape Love – Crossing a Threshold

December 4, 2012 by

Motivated By Agape Love

I want to piggyback on the last paragraph of Sarah’s section from yesterday. It flows right into my section today. Let’s read it again:

John kept his eyes on Jesus. He knew it wasn’t about him but about the mighty God he served. And that’s where we find inspiration. John’s story wasn’t about him; it was about Jesus. Just as our story isn’t about us; it’s about preparing the way for Jesus in the life of our husband (pg. 152, emphasis mine).

Jesus calls us to live out agape love toward our spouse. Agape love is a selfless, sacrificial, unconditional form of love. Agape is the love that Christ has for each one of us. Agape love is based upon a decision, not a feeling. When you live out agape love, you choose to love, despite the fact that you have been hurt. You choose to overlook the ways your spouse has slighted you. You choose to forgive your spouse for the way he has hurt you.

You choose to do all of this because Christ has done this for you. You choose to do this to honor God. You choose to love your spouse without expectation. You choose to love despite the cost.

Jesus loves every single one of us this way. Even Peter, who denied Jesus three times, was able to redeem himself in John 21:15-17 by choosing Jesus three times. If you really stop and think about that, it is pretty incredible. We will make mistakes, sometimes big ones, but Jesus still has agape love for us. We can honor Him by choosing to live out agape love toward the one we have pledged to spend our lives with.

But, you make the choice to love this way. Once you do, Jesus supplies the ability. Because we absolutely cannot do this of our own will. It is impossible. We are only able to love this way because of Christ working in us. The question is: Can you sacrifice your own needs, wants, and desires and truly love your husband with an agape form of love that is not based on anything other than choosing to love him like Christ loves you?

Crossing a Threshold

What are you willing to risk for your unbelieving husband to know Jesus? (pg. 156)

Have you ever prayed the most dangerous prayer? I have. But, I’ll admit the truth to you all since I have from the beginning of this study. I wanted this prayer answered in my way. I was not prepared for anything bad or negative to happen. I was not prepared to risk anything for my husband to know Jesus. I prayed the prayer believing that the Lord would put some things in my husband’s life and then his eyes would be opened. Ta-da! Magic. My hubby would fall to his feet and praise Jesus.

But, to really pray this prayer and sincerely mean it, we have to be loving our husbands with agape love.

The path of the spiritually mismatched is not an easy one. We must be willing to give up the life we have known and live the life that Christ wants us to live. This means sacrificing everything. Everything.

When we can finally do that, we allow God into those places that we have unintentionally closed off from Him. Those places that hurt and ache. He can fill those places and show us how to love the way He loves. Even if we have been hurt. Even if we have unforgiveness in our hearts. God cannot work in those places if we cannot open ourselves up and let Him in to change us.

Are you ready to cross that threshold?

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Let’s Pray: Father, please reveal any areas of my life that I have unintentionally closed off from you. Help me to confront these issues today, Lord, and to release each one of them to you. I choose today to let you in to those dark, hurtful places. Please give me peace and a supernatural strength as I hand over each one of these issues to you and trust completely in your unfailing love and grace. Teach me how to begin loving my husband with an agape love, the way that you love us, Lord. In Jesus precious and holy name I pray, Amen!

Your Assignment: Pray and ask the Lord to show you what areas of your life you are holding back from him; what is holding you back from loving your husband with an agape love. Release these things to Jesus. Let Him in to those places that you have closed off; the places where you hurt and ache; the places where you hold onto unmet expectations. Let today mark a turning point in your relationship with the Lord and with your husband. Leave a comment below and let me know what you think of these sections in our book. What insights did you glean? What did you learn?

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Our next Women’s Online Bible Study “Crazy Love” by Francis Chan, begins January 6, 2013. To sign up for this Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to learning about this “Crazy Love” with you!!  

We would LOVE to have your feedback on this study! Will you take a few minutes to complete the following survey? Your responses will help us create the best online bible study experience for you! CLICK THIS LINK to fill out the short 10 question form. Your responses are completely anonymous, I promise!! Thank you so much!

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Winning Him Without Words: Learn When to Pray The Most Dangerous Prayer – John the Baptist

December 3, 2012 by

John The Baptist

You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you.

ISAIAH 26:3

Lately I’ve caught myself saying “How GREAT is our God!” a lot. It seems like every time I open a book or read something on Facebook, God has left a personal message just for me to read. Last week my co-leader, Jennifer asked me if I could write today’s post because our sweet Beverly couldn’t. So of course I said I could write it. But then once I read it, I knew the real reason I was asked. It was because God had to reinforce a lesson in me. Yes, I would’ve read this section anyway and probably gathered some great information, but when I have to write about God’s word, I am forced (in a good way!) to slow down, take apart what I’ve just read and really understand it.

Today Dineen talks about John The Baptist and wonders if he ever felt left out, dissed, short changed. Did he feel like he should be part of the Twelve men chosen to walk with Jesus? He certainly had a right to feel that way. If he chose to Compare himself to the other Twelve, he was just as able to follow and spread Christ’s word, but he didn’t. He never questioned or bemoaned his role in life. He was satisfied to do what was predestined for him and he did it with honor and grace.

Sadly, I cannot say the same for myself. I have compared myself to others my entire life. In junior high a list went around our school where you rated the girls in our class based on looks and popularity. I was rated #2. Not too shabby, but to my 12 year old brain, it was devastating. All I could do was think of myself as #2. From that point on, it was my number on all my sports jerseys. I owned the number 2. It was my mind set.  I will always be second best to anyone that stands beside me.

As an adult, I still compare myself to others. And recently I’ve amped up my comparing.  Am I as creative as that mom? No. Am I as wealthy as that person? Certainly not. Will I ever be? No, because I have to be the #2. But I learned something in this chapter about being #2, or what I perceive as #2…it’s my role in life and it’s a GOOD role. I don’t have to be the prettiest wife on the block or the Martha Stewart mom or even the Beth Moore or Joyce Meyer of women’s ministry! I can be ME. Sarah Jane Boyer. And that is a great thing to be because He created ME and He has me on the path He predestined for me. First, He gave me the ability to work with words. Then later on down the path, He urged me to start writing about His words. For the first time in my life I am doing something I really enjoy and know that it is my gift from God, which makes it all the more sweeter. And ya know what? I’m not going to think of myself as #2 anymore. I know I am first and foremost with God because I have begun to make Him first and foremost with me. I don’t need to compare myself to others because there is no comparison. We are all #1 to God and all for different reasons.

What a freeing thing this is to not have to feel like I need to mold myself into something I’m not just to fit into one group/category or another. As long as I am pleasing God, I am in the right group/category. Like John The Baptist, I am content to fulfill the role God has chosen for me and I will do it with grace and honor to Him.

So how GREAT is our God, huh? He took this lesson and brought it to me to write on so that I would slow down, listen to Him and KNOW that I am right where I am suppose to be and there is no need to compare myself with others like I have been doing.  Thank you, God for the reinforcement!

Lets Pray:

Dear Lord, You knew I was struggling with comparison issues again and You brought this message right to me so that I would really sit up and listen. I pray that what I wrote will resonate with other ladies who read this post. Comparing ourselves with others is so harmful to our self esteem. Please show each and every one of our readers how important they are to You. Speak to them like You did to me and show them their special gifts that set them apart and make them #1 in Your eyes…the ONLY eyes that matter.  In your son’s precious name, Amen.

Your Assignment:

Today, please share with us what your special gift from God is. Let’s praise God for the gifts He has put in us to share with the world!

Godspeed,

Sarah

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Our next Women’s Online Bible Study “Crazy Love” by Francis Chan, begins January 6, 2013. To sign up for this Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to learning about this “Crazy Love” with you!!  

We would LOVE to have your feedback on this study! Will you take a few minutes to complete the following survey? Your responses will help us create the best online bible study experience for you! CLICK THIS LINK to fill out the short 10 question form. Your responses are completely anonymous, I promise!! Thank you so much!

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What’s New with the GCH Online Women’s Bible Study?

December 2, 2012 by

We have just two more weeks left for the Winning Him Without Words online bible study, and then we will take a short break in order to spend time with our families during the Christmas season.  I hope you have all enjoyed this study as much as I have!  I know for me personally, it has really enlightened so many things for me, and in my marriage!  Lynn Donovan and Dineen Miller did an amazing job putting this book together!  If you haven’t already, you should check out their website for continued encouragement!  That website is: www.SpirituallyUnequalMarriage.com.  Drop by and tell them what this study has done for you!  Be sure to tell them Girlfriends Coffee Hour sent you!

We would LOVE to have your feedback on this study! Will you take a few minutes to complete the following survey? Your responses will help us create the best online bible study experience for you! CLICK THIS LINK to fill out the short 10 question form. Your responses are completely anonymous, I promise!! Thank you so much!

__________

This week, our reading assignment is as follows:

Dec 3 – When to Pray the Most Dangerous Prayer / John the Baptist

Dec 4 – Agape Love / Crossing Threshold

Dec 5 – Prepared for God / Unanswered Prayers

Dec 6 – Perpetual State of Waiting

Dec 7 – Discovery / Prayer

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And now for our BIG Announcement!!

Our next bible study is going to be another one of those “Life-Changing” studies!  My church did this study a few years ago, and it was AMAZING, to say the least!!

Here is a video by author Francis Chan, about “Crazy Love“.

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Our Next Online Bible Study

“Crazy Love”

Begins January 6, 2013!

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Crazy Love

Overwhelmed by a Relentless God

By Francis Chan

With Danae Yankoski

Crazy Love

Crazy Love

God is LOVE! Crazy, relentless, all-powerful love. Have you ever wondered if we’re missing it? It’s crazy, if you think about it. The God of the universe–the Creator of nitrogen and pine needles, galaxies and E-minor–loves us with a radical, unconditional, self-sacrificing love. And what is our typical response? We go to church, sing songs, and try not to cuss. Whether you’ve verbalized it yet or not…we all know something is wrong.

Does something deep inside your heart long to break free from the status quo?

Are you hungry for an authentic faith that addresses the problems of our world with tangible, even radical, solutions?

God is calling you to a passionate love relationship with Himself. Because the answer to religious complacency isn’t working harder at a list of do’s and don’ts–it’s falling in love with God. And once you encounter His love, as Francis Chan describes it, you will never be the same. Because when you’re wildly in love with someone, it changes everything.

Girlfriends Coffee Hour is so excited to host this next Online Bible Study beginning January 6, 2013.  What an amazing way to start the New Year off, right?  We hope you will join us!!

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To sign up for this Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions.  You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study.  We’re looking forward to learning about this “Crazy Love” with you!!  

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Saturdays with Shandy: Christmas Edition! Cinnamon Applesauce Ornaments

December 1, 2012 by

ornaments2

I have such fun decorating our family’s Christmas trees. Yes, TREES. Plural. We have our big tree that is beautifully decorated in our front room, and we have two smaller trees… a Norwegian and Swedish tree in our dining room, and our kitchen tree, decorated with miniature kitchen utensils and cinnamon applesauce ornaments – which I am going to teach you how to make today! They are very simple, last for years, and make the house smell wonderful! And who doesn’t love a spicy aroma wafting from the kitchen this time of year? It just shouts Christmas! By the way, kids of all ages will have fun joining you in the kitchen to make these, so let them help, and make some memories together!

ornaments

Here’s what you may need to pick up at the store if you don’t have them on hand:

Applesauce. Cinnamon. Cookie Cutters. Material Scraps or Twine.

Easy, right? Let’s get started!

Directions,  adapted from McCormick.com:

  • Preheat oven to 200° F.
  • In a bowl, mix together 3/4 c. applesauce and 1 cup + 3 T. cinnamon until well incorporated and smooth.
  • Sprinkle cinnamon on a cutting board, and roll out dough to 1/3″ thickness.
  • Cut out with small cookie cutters.
  • Carefully place cut outs on an unprepared cookie sheet.
  • Using a straw, poke a hole at the top of each ornament, as shown in the picture at the top.
  • Bake in oven for 2-1/2 hours, until hard. I kept mine in for an additional 15 minutes.
  • Cool on a wire rack.
  • Cut or tear strips of muslin, homespun, or twine for each ornament. I used coffee-stained muslin. Mmmm, smells delicious!
  • Place a strip through the hole of each ornament and knot at the top.
  • Hang on tree!
  • These will last for years if stored carefully in an airtight container!
  • Note: even though these are made with just applesauce and cinnamon, they are not edible. Trust me 😉

Here is a picture of my kitchen tree. It’s a work in progress… needs primitive grungy lights, another strand of red beads, and a few more handmade ornaments yet, but I wanted to give you a peek at what I do with my applesauce cinnamon ornaments!

kitchen tree

Love & {Christmas} Blessings,

Shandy

Be sure to visit Shandy’s personal blog Aprons ‘n Pearls for crafts, recipes, homekeeping tips & more!

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