December 27, 2024

Captivating: Unseen, Unsought, Uncertain – The Heart of a Woman

January 8, 2013 by

To be honest, dealing with matters of the heart, dealing with heart issues and things along these lines is something that I try to avoid if I can; I think a lot of women do the same. I am a strong, independent woman who is working full time, being a wife, raising a family, running a home, all at the same time as trying to look like the woman in the magazine. I may at times pull off this illusion but I’m not fooling myself, and I’m most definitely not fooling God.

There are days that the laundry and dishes don’t get done, the kids eat pizza for breakfast and cereal for dinner, I’m not the nicest to those around me, I get frustrated and lose my temper and I am as far from the character of Ruth as I can get. But I am a child of The Most High.

To continue with my honesty, I often feel like a failure, like I’m not living up to the standards of a woman, mind you, a lot of these standards were standards that I set in place for myself. In order to be successful in life, well, to be successful in my day, I need to accomplish a,b, and c; and I need to look pretty and appealing while doing this a, b and c. yes, I know it’s laughable, but it’s so real. Not only for myself, but for so many women.

When I started reading this section of the book I was screaming on the inside in response to the first statement regarding how she knew she wasn’t alone in feeling a sense of failure, I was screaming “no! You’re not alone, I’m right there with you!” From not finishing the dishes one night to not feeling like the woman God called me to be, it seems as if failure or at least the illusion of failure is everywhere I turn.

But, I can’t help but ask myself, who am I to shame myself into feeling this way? Who am I to allow satan’s lies of inadequacy fill my head? We were created in God’s image. He knew who He was creating when He created me and when He created you.

 

One night, a while ago I was reading this verse and I realized that I need not guard my heart from outside influences but I also need to guard my heart from myself; from my mind and from my words, from my self-imposed standards. I realized that what I say to myself can do just as much damage as what others may speak into my life.

Life can cause us to feel unseen at times, unsought, and these can leave us with a feeling of uncertainty.  God sees our hearts. God is seeking after our hearts. And in all the uncertain areas of our hearts, God is that certainty we can count on.

It’s time to learn our hearts again, it’s time to listen to our hearts again. The Eldredge’s presented some questions to us within these sections. “What is it that a woman wants?” “What is it that she dreams of?” Let’s make these more personal; begin to think about what you want, and what you desire.

 

With Love,

Tonya

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Your assignment:

 

I am _________ enough!

 

So often we speak into our hearts what we feel we aren’t, but how often do we say what we are? Today we are going to shout and declare what we are and what God has gifted within us. We are going to speak positive words into our hearts.

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Let’s pray:

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank You for creating us in Your image. Please help us to remember this when we question ourselves and when the feelings of shame and failure began to creep into our hearts. We were beautifully and wonderfully made. Please open our hearts and minds as we shout the positive words today.  Please help us to see the gifts You have placed inside of our hearts. Thank You for seeing us Lord.  Thank You for seeking our hearts, and thank You for remaining the certainty we need in our lives.  In Jesus’ name we pray, amen.

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If you are interested in joining this amazing online Bible study, click HERE to sign up. Once you are registered, you will receive an email with further details.

If you would like to send a personal message to Tonya in regards to this blog, you may email her at:  TonyaEllison@girlfriendscoffeehour.com

 

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Lady in Waiting: Meditations: You Must Move In, Hannah Whitall Smith

December 12, 2012 by
John 15: 9-10

John 15: 9-10

Life can feel so complicated and complex at times, answers can feel so far away and four words “abide in my love” can seem unrealistic and unattainable. How do I abide in His love? How do I find that place that Hannah Whitall Smith describes as a place without the fear of “supposes”? Well, her words tell us to simply move in. John 15: 9-10 does not tell us that we have to be single or married, young or old, whether we have children or not doesn’t matter either. What matters is that we are all children of God and He is our dwelling place, He is our safe place, our place without the worry of fear.

Throughout this study we have had to look deep into ourselves, we have had to ask ourselves questions that may have been difficult, our hearts may have changed, and our way of thinking may have been evaluated; but, in the end it brought us closer to God, closer to our safe place.

I’ve said from the beginning that our relationship is the number one priority, not our status in life. We can abide in His love because He says we can. While you are a lady in waiting, after you are married, and every place in between, abide in His love.

“God is your dwelling place, and you must see to it that you take up your abode there. You must move in.”

 

Let’s Pray:

Dear Heavenly Father, Thank You for a safe place from the fear of the “supposes”.  Thank You for loving us, loving us enough to open Your heart and Your arms to us, regardless of our status. Thank You for using this study to teach us, for using it to help us grow closer to You.  Please help us to continue to grow and learn, please encourage us to abide in You despite the complications of life.  In Jesus’ name, amen.

Your Assignment:

What does abiding in God’s love mean to you?

 

Our Next Single Women’s Online Bible Study

“Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul”

by John & Stasi Eldredge

Begins January 6, 2013

To sign up for this Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to studying “Captivating” with you!!

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Lady in Waiting: Consequences of Impatience

December 5, 2012 by

Ten years ago, I found myself single and pregnant. With fear strapped to my leg like a chain, all I could think of was a future as an unwed mother. My daughter’s father, my boyfriend at the time, proposed marriage and I accepted. Throughout the next few months I felt something nagging at my spirit. Something just didn’t feel right. I ignored it for a while longer. At one point I could no longer pretend that the feeling wasn’t there, and I had to face the truth. I was being impatient, I was grasping at the life I felt I should have rather than waiting to see what God wanted for me in this situation. I needed to check my motives, I needed to step back and pray about the situation, and I needed to trust God.

The marriage didn’t happen. We went our separate ways, and although my daughter doesn’t have a relationship with her biological father, I feel in my heart that the impatient decision I was about to make would have had much more dire consequences than living as a single mom. Thinking about what could have been scares me.

When you’re facing the possibility of making an impatient decision do you take the time to step back and look at the possible consequences. Do you seek God and inquire of what He wants for your life? I didn’t until it was almost too late. The bible is very clear in saying that our decision will affect our family generations to come.

Exodus 34:7

…that will by no means clear the guilty; visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children, and upon the children’s children, unto the third and to the fourth generation.

Is this a chance we’re willing to take?

Even if children are never involved, is the possibility of not being able to share your love of Christ with your spouse a life you desire? In order for a man to truly know our heart he must first know God, if he doesn’t know God, he will never truly know you.  An impatient decision can jeopardize the blessings God has planned for our lives.

 Deuteronomy 28:2

And all these blessings shall come upon you and overtake you, because you obey the voice of the Lord your God:

Deuteronomy 28:15

“But it shall come to pass, if you do not obey the voice of the Lord your God, to observe carefully all His commandments and His statutes which I command you today, that all these curses will come upon you and overtake you.

When a decision arises that needs to be made, take the time to seek God, listen for His voice and for His direction. And always remember that He protects our heart, He only wants the best for us, including our future husband.  Don’t take the risk, and wait for his blessing.

With Love,

Tonya Ellison

____________________________

 Lets Pray:

Dear Heavenly Father, your words are clear, your warnings and your promises are plainly written. When we are facing a decision that we are going to make with an impatient heart, please Lord touch our hearts and minds so that we are not able to ignore your urging  Remind us that your promises and blessings are meant for our benefit. And that our impatient decisions will have consequences, consequences that not only affect us but those around us, consequences that will affect our futures. Instead I pray that we seek your will, and that we trust your plans. Thank you for planning our futures, thank you for protecting our hearts.  In Jesus’ name I pray amen.

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Your Assignment:

I refer to scripture a lot. I feel that the answer to every question, problem and possible impatient decision is held in that wonderful book. So, what scriptures do you go to when you are faced with a decision, when you’re unsure of what to do?

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Our Next Single Women’s Online Bible Study

“Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul”

by John & Stasi Eldgredge

Begins January 6, 2013

To sign up for this Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to studying “Captivating” with you!!

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Lady in Waiting: Avoiding Bozos

November 28, 2012 by

But, he seemed like such a “nice guy”.  How many times have we heard that?  How many times have I said that myself? I thought I had a Boaz, but after awhile the disguise fell off and the Bozo came out. I think we’ve all been there before.

Like so many things in life the difference between spotting a Bozo from a Boaz boils down to the condition of our hearts. Three aspects actually, our standards, our convictions, and our motives (yes, back to the motives!)

Oh, those motives, they seem to determine so many things in life. But they have such a large impact on our thoughts and actions that we have to constantly evaluate why we are doing things, why we are saying things and even why we  are thinking things. When it comes to dating we have to ask ourselves why we are dating who we are dating. Questioning our motives will impact our standards and our convictions in this situation or in others down the road; I believe that if our motives do not line up with God, then our standards and convictions won’t either.

God already knows why we are doing what we’re doing. He already knows why we’re dating someone. He wants us to see that we deserve more than accepting a date with a bozo because it’s been a long time since we were last taken out.  He knows we deserve more than dating a man who isn’t a Christian because the loneliness is growing in our hearts. He knows that we deserve a Boaz, and that a Bozo is not fit for a daughter of the King.

As a daughter of the most high, we can have standards that line up with His word, and yes those standards are high. But those are the standards our Father set for us, remember He has our best interest in mind, and wants us to have the Boaz that we deserve.

With Love,

Tonya Ellison

_________________________

Let’s pray:

Dear Heavenly Father, again we are found examining our motives, why do we do the things we do, and why do we accept the things from people that are less than we deserve? Please help us to examine our motives before we act.  Please help us to line our motives up with Your will and Your word. We are daughters of the Most High, and as such You have set Your standards in place for our Boaz. Please help us embrace these standards, and thank You for only wanting the best for our lives.  In Jesus. Name, amen.

Your assignment:

I love how the Auburn University student wrote down her standards and carried them with her. We are going to refer back to this list for today’s assignment. Are there any characteristics that you want to add to your list? Next, make a list similar to this if you don’t already have one, what qualities and standards do you want on your list for your Boaz. Remember, these are standards that our Father has already placed here for us may seem high, but they are what you deserve.

_________________________

For the “Lady in Waiting” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

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Lady in Waiting: Spiritual Monitor

November 22, 2012 by

This year my goal has been to slow down. To take the time to seek God in all that I do and to not rush into words and actions; so when I read this section of the chapter I was excited because it lined up with my slowing down plan. However, I never thought that this plan would extend to my friends and how I reacted when I was listening to their excited stories. But there were a few points that stood out to me in regards to this.

  • “Encourage your friend, instead to wait until she sees how the friendship develops”
  •  Our excitement and the excitement of our friends can distract from developing the relationship with God.
  • Psalm 62:5 “my soul, wait thou only upon God; my expectation is only from Him”
  • Do not run ahead of the Lord in your relationships.

I think that learning these things ourselves first will help us to become spiritual monitors for our friends.

There are three other key things needed to become spiritual monitors, both for ourselves and for our friends. These are 1. A relationship with God, 2, prayer and 3. Love. If we try to reign ourselves in, and tame our tongues without these three factors included, we will not be successful.

Talk about an eye opener for me. I always thought that my excitement for my friend’s stories is what made me a good friend. I thought that sharing the magical what if’s with my friends was what I needed to do to support their dreams and desires. But, in reality I need to be encouraging them to spend time with God and encouraging them to work on developing their relationship with Him, while He develops their relationship with others.

Thousands of needless tears,
Produced by careless cheers,
Assuming that Boaz is finally here,
When the arrival of her prince is not even near…
~JMK

Yes we can encourage our friends, and be excited from them. But we as spiritual monitors should make sure to remind our friends in love that their lives are in God’s hands and to not let their excitement distract them from the one relationship that truly matters.

With Love,
Tonya Ellison

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Let’s Pray:

Dear heavenly father, you have placed people in our lives to be our spiritual monitors. You have place d these people here in the times that our emotions are high and in times when we may not be seeing clearly. Thank you for a loving person to remind us when we’re becoming distracted. Please open our eyes and hearts to their wise words. Please remind us to focus on our relationship with you and trust that you will and that you are working on our behalf in all situations.  In Jesus’ name, Amen

Your Assignment:
Do you have a spiritual monitor? Or have you been a spiritual monitor to a friend? Share with the benefit of this person in your life and how their words blessed you in your situation.

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For the “Lady in Waiting” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

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Lady in Waiting: The 11th Commandment – Prenuptual Fantasies

November 21, 2012 by

The 11th commandment: Thou shalt not defraud thyself.

 I wanted to look up the meaning of fraud when I started reading this section of the book. The Miriam-Webster dictionary describes the word defraud as depriving someone of something by deception or fraud.  What am I depriving myself of? My contentment. I want more than what I have, I don’t take the time to slow down and pray about a situation before acting on it. I try to convince myself that a situation may be more than what it really is. I am deceiving and defrauding myself.

Sometimes reality gets boring, and sometimes reality can make me feel less than happy when I look at where I am and where others around me might be.

Remember, God wants to protect us, He wants the best for us, but we need to slow down and step back before acting. “To heed the eleventh commandment, you must consciously resist doing another good deed for a man in your life until you know the motive behind your “unselfish” gesture”. The authors of this book aid it beautifully.

Another thing that I try to always remind myself is that God made me to be an emotional person; women in general are emotional and at times these emotions try to get the best of us. We feel a flutter in our hearts and we run with it. We see the possibility for an open door and run through it, without taking the time to see if that is the direction God wants us to go in.

We need to go back to checking our motives. Why am I doing what I’m doing?

The authors also say that “a dedicated Christian should do good deeds, but if you limit your service to the men in your group it will ultimately backfire.” I want to stretch this a little further. If we do good deeds for only a selective few in our circle it will backfire, if we’re doing things for others only to benefit ourselves it will hurt us in the end.

God has our situations in His hands, He will make things happen when they need to happen and he will bring the relationship to us in his timing with the person of his choosing. We need only be willing to let Him. We need to enjoy His gift of contentment.

This doesn’t mean that if we find ourselves interested in a person that we have to run in the other direction. What it means is that we need to seek God. We need to give the situation to Him and pray that his will be done. We need to check our motives before doing good deeds, before jumping into the situation with an open heart.

Remember, a good Christian should do good deeds for those God places in your path. He wants us to show his love through our actions to everyone.

With Love,

Tonya Ellison

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Let’s Pray:

Dear Heavenly Father, Thank you for everything you have given us. It feels as if life gets boring at times, it feels like the lives of others is more than ours. Please help us to remember that you love us, and that love provides what and who we need. Please help us to recognize when we are defrauding ourselves and help us turn to you. Thank you for creating opportunities in which we can do good for others. Please remind us that we are to help all of your children because you are love. Touch our hearts when our motives are not in the right place. Thank you for your mercy and grace Lord.  In Jesus’ name we pray, Amen

Your Assignment: When you feel the pull of defrauding how do you counteract it? Please share some ideas, scriptures, quotes that you use to remind you to be content with what and who God has placed in your life.

______________________________

For the “Lady in Waiting” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

 

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Lady in Waiting: Manipulation and Maneuvering

November 14, 2012 by

 

This post is going to boil down to two questions:

1. Are we trying to maneuver and manipulate situations to our benefit ourselves?

2. Or, are we turning our situation over to God and trusting Him to send us the man (job, friend, etc.) He has chosen for us?

 

I find it interesting that we as women will go to many extremes to get what we want.  These extremes are not always manipulative, nor does it involve us “crawling across broken glass” to reach what we want. But nonetheless, we are willing to get very creative when we want something we can’t instantly get our hands on.

I can relate to this because I am a “now” person. I see something I want and I want it now. There are a lot of times where I have to step back and look at the situation, I have to step back and pray about the situation; I need to ask God questions like “do I need this”, “is this for me?” and before I met my husband I had to ask “Is he for me?”

Manipulation is a form of control.

We feel that we can lead a situation in a direction that will benefit us in the way we feel it should.

Our motives may be pure. Simply to position ourselves to better our chances at the attention we seek. Whether this attention is from a man, or an attempt at securing a better position at work, or catching a deal at a store, the bottom line is that with this manipulation and maneuvering we are trying to gain control but we are also trying to take the control from the one person who has the power and desire to work on our behalf.  We are trying to take the control away from God.

Again the two questions we need to ask ourselves: Are we trying to maneuver and manipulate situations to our benefit ourselves? Or, are we turning our situation over to God and trusting Him to send us the man (job, friend, etc.) He has chosen for us?

God wants to bless us, he wants to give u the desires of our hearts, but we have to turn the control over to Him, and trust his timing.

Psalm 84:11

For the Lord God is a sun and shield;
The Lord will give grace and glory;
No good thing will He withhold
From those who walk uprightly

So what do we do in these situations? What do we do when we want something or someone and we don’t have a clear path to that thing or person? Like the authors of the book said, instead of maneuvering the situation we are to do nothing. Give it to God. Be the person He created you to be, we continue to bless those around you as we are commanded to do regardless of the attention it may or may not generate. We trust His time and His plans. And we must pray.

With Love,

Tonya Ellison

_________________________________

Let’s pray:

Dear Lord,

Thank you. Thank you for having our lives planned out since before we were even born. At times we try to control situations around us; we try to make them work for us. Please forgive us for forgetting that you are working on our behalf and that you have already touched the situation and that it will play out to our benefit.  When we are facing situations in which we want to manipulate the control, please touch our hearts and remind us that you are in control, remind us to bless those around us, because that is what you designed us to do.

In Jesus name we pray, Amen.

_________________________________

Your Assignment:

Let’s journal today. Lets look at situations in our life that we may be trying to maintain or gain control from God. Journal about it, you don’t have to share this part, but look around and see if there is a person you can focus on blessing rather than focusing on the situation you want to change. Please share this part. This lesson came at a great time of the year, we can turn our situation over to God and our control over to God and we can bless others.

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For the “Lady in Waiting” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

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Lady in Waiting: Emotional, Relational, Spiritual

November 7, 2012 by

I honestly don’t know how to get started here. I didn’t even need to see the sections I was writing on this week before thoughts began to pour into my head, all I needed to see was the word “purity”. And it made me freeze. How can I write to women about purity when I see my past as tainted, when my purity is a thing of the past. Then I got quiet and prayed. This isn’t the first time I have had to use my past to speak to others, and yes I am no longer pure in regards to my physical state, but God has forgiven me and washed me whiter than snow. This is how I can talk about this topic. It doesn’t make it easier by any means!  The consequences of my actions are still something I deal with, but I can stop myself and pray, knowing I am forgiven, and that the lessons learned will help someone else.

I became pregnant with my daughter at 17 and had her when I was 18. I wasn’t married. I have dealt with the emotional, relational and spiritual consequence these sections speak about, I think a lot of us have.

God gave us a gift when he tied our emotions to our physical state.  It enables us to love hard.  It drives us to give our all to the one we’re with. But that gift only works the way it is designed to work when we are with the one God has chosen for us, and under the bond of marriage. It is stated more than once in this section that God wants to protect us; protect us from a broken heart, protect us from condemnation, protect us from fear, from resentment. It also lists doubt, depression, bitterness and mistrust. I remember feeling all of these after purity was no longer one of the characteristics I possessed. He wants to protect our hearts and minds from these negative emotions that sexual promiscuity will bring.

This section further defends the thought that women are complex creations. Yes ladies we are complex, we have many layers, we are hard to understand, and at times we can be complicated. This is not a bad thing. It is part of Gods security system for us. But have you ever set off an alarm by using the incorrect code and haven’t been able to turn it off? That’s what premarital sex does to us. It sets off an alarm that only God can turn off.  But instead of a screaming noise, our emotions, relationships, and spirituality are screaming.  Our internal alarm systems need the right code.

 The code of Psalm 51:10

Create in me a clean heart, O God,
And renew a steadfast spirit within me.

 The code of Colossians 3:1-2

If then you were raised with Christ, seek those things which are above,

where Christ is, sitting at the right hand of God.

Whether it is one night, or a long term relationship, premarital sex negatively effects three of the most important aspects of a woman’s life. Emotional. Relational. Spiritual. We are God’s ladies in waiting. When situations present themselves that deal with the topic of purity, take a conscious step back and think of the impact it will have on these three areas.

With Love,

Tonya Ellison

___________________________________________________________________________________________

Lets Pray:

Thank you Lord for the security system you have placed within each and every one of us. Thank you for your forgiveness and redemption. Lord please touch our hearts when we are facing different situations and bring to mind how much you value our emotions, relationships and spirituality. Thank you for protecting us.

In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen

Your assignment:

I listed some codes I use when I’m faced with certain situations or when Satan tries to remind me of my past.  What are some scriptures you turn to when purity is concerned?

___________________________________________________________________________________________

For the “Lady in Waiting” Online Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

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Lady in Waiting: Seeking True Love

October 31, 2012 by

True love.

I think these are two words that every woman wants to not only hear, but two words that she wants to feel. As a single woman I felt that I was unable to find true love. As a woman in a failed relationship I felt that what I thought was true love, truly wasn’t  and that true love was something I could never truly feel. The true love that I was seeking always seemed to be out of my grasp.

In retrospect I learned a lesson. Whether I was single, dating, married, divorced. Whatever stage of life I am in there is one person I need to seek true love from. God.  It’s not about where I am in life; it’s about my personal relationship with God. It’s about me seeking him with an open heart, a clean heart. It’s about me seeking him with all of me. It’s about the relationship between my God and me.

Seeking God isn’t some elaborate, grand quest. Like the authors of the book said, it is similar to developing a friendship. We can talk to Him, we can listen for His answers, we can write our thoughts and prayers to Him, and He has written the most beautiful book to us. We can think and meditate on His promises and on His word.  We can set our minds on pleasing Him, and on walking in His will.

Jeremiah 29:12-13

Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

His is a true love that we are promised to find. A true love that is unconditional.  Like many promises God makes to us we have a responsibility to do our part. We can seek and find this true love but we must do so with “our whole heart, a clean heart.”  We need to seek God for who He is, not what He can do. We previously talked about motives. Why do I desire to seek God? Because I feel that it will make me look better in God’s eyes and I’ll receive what I’m asking for?  We need to seek God’s face, not just His hand.”

We will find the true love that we seek when we seek God with an open heart, a pure heart and a willing heart.  Despite where we are in our lives, married or single, this true love needs to be the desire of us all. It was promised to us all, and it is our responsibility to be seekers of true love.

God Bless,

Tonya

_______________________________

Lets Pray:

Heavenly Father,

Thank you for the promise of true love. Thank you for an unconditional love. Create in us pure hearts Lord, so that we may seek you with a pure clean heart, with all of our heart, soul and mind. Please teach us how to seek you intimately, teach us how to build a relationship with you. We want to be the woman in Jeremiah 29, the woman who finds you. Thank you for giving us your true love.

In Jesus Name I pray, Amen

Your Assignment:

The first part of this section lists how we can develop a friendship with someone, then compares this to developing a relationship with God. How can you apply these steps to your daily life? How can you apply them to building a relationship with your Heavenly Father?

____________________________

For the “Lady in Waiting” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

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Lady In Waiting: Fit for a King

October 24, 2012 by

 

And Isaac went out to meditate in the field in the evening; and he lifted his eyes and looked, and there, the camels were coming. Then Rebekah lifted her eyes, and when she saw Isaac she dismounted from her camel … Then Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah’s tent; and he took Rebekah and she became his wife, and he loved her.

Genesis 24: 63-64, 67

 

Ahhh, so this is where Disney gets it from?

As little girls we learn to be princesses from Cinderella, or Sleeping Beauty, my daughter is learning from Mulan, and Tiana (Princess and the Frog). I honestly never thought to look at the Bible and the stories of Ruth and Rebekah as how-to guides on my journey to being a princess. But, the creative minds at Disney were not far off from the example of what makes a good Princess. They are always kind, willing to help and always seem to want to do what’s best. I am willing to go as far as to say that some of them pulled the characteristics of some of the best selling princesses from the bible.

Ruth and Rebekah were hard working, king, selfless, sought to do what was right, and were both examples of a virtuous woman. I’m not saying that God is necessarily asking you to haul water for strange men, or glean off of the field, but He is asking us to display his characteristics now while we are ladies in waiting, so that these characteristics will be second nature to us in what God has planned for us.

He doesn’t just want and expect this. He gave us guides on how to be the princesses he destined us to be.

A great how-to guide on being a princess is Proverbs 31. God tells us step by step how we can live to become that princess.  The commonality between the Proverbs 31 woman, Ruth, and Rebekah is that all three fully allowed God to move in their lives without trying to stop Him.  They allowed Him to create a Christ likeness within them that shown brighter than their outward appearance could ever have.

God gave Boaz to Ruth.
God gave Isaac to Rebekah.
And God showed how much the Proverbs 31 woman’s husband and children loved and respected her.

There are things and people God wants to place in our lives, but first He wants to prepare us for the futures He has planned out for us.  Every little girl dreams of being a princess on some level, as that little girl grows up that dream doesn’t often fade, it may go to the back of the dreams pile but it remains. God is telling us that we are his princesses, and He is preparing us for our Prince; but we are responsible as well. We are responsible for opening our hearts and minds and allowing God to work in us, we are responsible to being Christ-like.

To be honest I was far from these three women in these examples. I believe that God was preparing me for marriage before I married my husband, but I don’t think that I fully accepted what god was doing until after I was married, and until after I felt the pains of a lack of preparation. I didn’t truly surrender myself to God to allow Him to mold me into the princess He created me to be until after I said “I do”, until after I saw how lack of preparation on my part can affect a marriage, and myself. I thank God every day that He continued to prepare me and that He continues to prepare me.

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Let’s Pray:
Father, thank you! Thank you for making us royalty, thank you for not simply expecting something of us, but showing us how to be the virtuous women you destined us to be, thank you for your examples.  Thank you for continuing to sustain and strengthen us on our journeys as ladies in waiting.  Please continue to prepare us, and mold us. You have our “happily ever after”, we don’t know what it is, but we do know that it is from you and that it is good. Thank you for this time in our lives.  In Jesus’ name, Amen

Your Assignment:
Read through the stories of Ruth, Rebecca, and the Proverbs 31 woman, what Christ-like characteristics do you see that we as princess possess.  What characteristics have you been blessed with? What characteristics are you praying for to be strengthened?

** Remember God isn’t asking that we be a perfect princess; it takes work, preparation and his grace and mercy. It’s a life long journey.

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 For the “Lady In Waiting” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

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