May 6, 2026

Crazy Love: Chapter 6 – When You’re In Love (pp 101-103)

February 12, 2013 by

Don’t Try so Hard is the topic of conversation on pages 101-103 in Crazy Love.  Don’t try so hard to do “what” is the question we might be asking.

Mr. Chan answers that with:  “God wants us to crave a relationship with Him as we crave all genuine love relationships.  He wants believers to desire Him and not be slaves who serve Him out of obligation.”

CrazyLove_Ch6_Martha

Chan then quotes Galatians 5:13, 14:  “You, my brothers, were called to be free.  But, do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather; serve one another in love.  The entire law is summed up in a single command:  ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’”

From this scripture, Chan points out that when we love, we’re free.  We don’t have to worry about a burdensome load of commands.  He then ask the question, “Do you feel free in your Christian life?”

Before, we can answer Chan’s question, I think we must take into consideration what Galatians 5:1 says:  “Stand fast therefore in the liberty wherewith Christ hath made us free, and be not entangled again with the yoke of bondage.”

The word in that verse that is blaring out to me is entangled.  My handy on-line dictionary defines entangle as:  ‘to twist together or entwine into a confusing mass; snarl, to complicate; confuse, to involve in a tangle.’

Now back to Chan’s question:  “Do you feel free in your Christian life to genuinely love and desire God, and not serve Him out of obligation?”

I believe before we can answer that question, we must first take a look at things that might have entangled us.  May I suggest a few:

  1. Pay God Back:  Straight to the point, and excuse my English:  “It ain’t even possible to pay God back for what His Son, Jesus, did for us.”  No Scripture is needed as a reference.  If ever we should need a reminder, take a look at a picture of Jesus on the Cross; that should quench that little lie.
  2. False Guilt: A failure to trust God to forgive their sins may cause some people to try to serve God in order to work off their guilt, as in works of penance.  But, this is contrary to God’s promise of complete forgiveness to all who confess their sins.  (Colossians 2:13; 1 John 1:9)
  3. Inability to say No: Are you one who says “yes” every time someone from the church calls and ask you to fill a certain position?”  “Do you feel obligated, even though you don’t feel right for the job?”  “Are you left with feelings of guilt if you say, ‘No’?”  I fell into this category until I learned that God had placed within me certain gifts as to how He wanted me to serve Him. (Ephesians 4:11)  My pastor sums it up well:  “Our gift is the one we use with minimum effort, maximum effectiveness, and a maximum of joy.” Believe me, that took a load of guilt off me as I began to serve Him in love with the gift He had placed within me rather than out of obligation.

And the obligation list could go and on into more areas, such as:  legalism, self-seeking, performance-orientated, to name a few.

Sir Walter Scott, noted novelist and poet in the 1800’s said:  “Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive.”

If we are serving God out of obligation, we have woven a tangled web, and we are the ones being deceived.  Let’s get untangled, so we can move forward and be free to serve God out of our Love for Him.  

Be blessed,

Martha

 

************
   
Let’s Pray: 
Father God, first of all, we open our hearts to the convicting power of the Holy Spirit to show us where we have felt obligated to serve You.  Help us to replace those motives and lies, so that we are free to love YOU with a genuine love as You desire.  In Jesus’ name I pray.  Amen.

Your Assignment: 
Do you feel obligated in any way to love and serve the Lord?  If so, what has entangled you?

 

If you would like more information about Crazy Love Bible study, click HERE to sign up.  Once we receive your registration, we will email you further details.

If you would like to send Martha a personal message in regards to this blog, you may email her at: Martha@GirlfriendsCoffeeHour.com

Filed Under: Women's Ministry Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , ,

Life’s Healing Choices: Choice 6 – How do you forgive others and (self)? (pp 171-175)

February 12, 2013 by

If someone had told me two years ago that, in order for me to become well and be healed, I would have to forgive someone that I felt helped get me there in the first place, I would have laughed, and shaken my head ‘no.’  That is exactly what I did, too. Yeah right, I need to forgive someone who hurt me so badly? They are the ones who had broken my heart in so many ways and did not care at all about it, why should I forgive them?  …Because the Bible says you can’t receive what you are unwilling to give: I need to forgive because God has forgiven me.

So how on earth can we do this—forgiving others? Baker gives us the three R’s to show us how.

1. Reveal Your Hurt
2. Release the Offender
3. Replace Your Hurt with God’s Peace

I learned something very important a few years ago when I attempted to write my first resentment list. Turns out about 90% of the people on that list were loved ones. So how on earth can I love someone so much towards who I feel a great deal of anger, bitterness, hurt, and resentment? Baker states, “Perhaps it’s because we have a misconception that you can’t love somebody and be angry at them the same time. The truth is, you can.”

You can’t get over hurt until you admit the pain. Have you been able to do this? I have for years been able to tell my therapist, husband, and some family about people in my life who have hurt me. I have “on the surface,” talked about being angry, disappointed, and hurt by them. Truth is, I never really let myself be real and admit that deep pain inside completely to myself. I did not want to explore those feelings that I HAVE tried to cover up by instead replacing with negative feelings. I had become consumed with resentment over the unfairness of my life.

When I joined this ministry, the first thing I shared was my testimony. I have given my testimony at church about my hurts, hang ups, and habits. In my testimony, I spoke of relationships that hurt me deeply, scars and addictions that stayed with me and held me with chains. They affected me in the way I acted, the way I interacted with others, and the way I identified with who I am. But it was different in this testimony. I actually admitted to myself the truth—the hurt. It was wrong, and it hurt me.

In the beginning, it was not easy revealing my hurts. I felt so vulnerable for a while. It was not easy being honest and revealing the pain I have felt in some situations for over 30 years. I had tried to suppress my emotions for so long.  Doing so only made those hurts in me worse and I therefore became very angry inside. “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you” Ephesians 4:31, 32.

After revealing those hurts, it was time to release the offender. How on earth was that going to be possible? I had so much anger toward them that my heart was so hardened. I now understand that I can’t forgive them myself…I needed God’s help. “With man it is impossible, but not with God. For all things are possible with God.“ Mark 10:27 ESV.  Not only does God want us to forgive, but He wants us to love our enemy who wronged us and hurt us. Whether the person asks for forgiveness or not, you do it for your own sake. I repeat, you release the offender for your own sake. The truth is there will be a time that you and I will need forgiveness in the future.

Let’s look at some things the Lord and His Word say about forgiveness and love. Jesus said, “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven” (Matthew 5:44, 45a). Yet Jesus tells us to love as he did.  “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another” (John 13:34 ESV).

John13_34

I would like to share with you how I was able to release my offender: I prayed for them. I had much difficulty doing so, but I prayed asking God to help me to even want to forgive them because honestly I did not want to. I did this for a while, and also added in my prayer that I hoped they would have a good day. I started small, but that was enough. God started chipping away at that anger and bitterness I held in my heart toward them. The more I prayed to be able to want to forgive them, the more I could pray to forgive them. Then honestly one morning I woke up to the most unusual feeling inside (that I now understand is peace). My heart for that person was softened and God replaced the bitterness with love. God gave me peace and allowed me to forgive. He released me from that hurt. It’s just one of the amazing miracles He does for us. When we listen and obey, He helps us to love and heal inside. By blessing those who curse us, doing well to those who hate us, and praying for them He also helps us to forgive and love them. I finally started to have compassion for this particular person because I was able to see that he, too, had been hurt in his life (hurting people hurt each other).

That peace I received on the inside had changed me in so many ways. I felt better, I was so proud of myself after finally admitting to myself the truth of how I felt. And through God, I finally loved instead of hated. That’s what God wants for us all. He wants us to love and forgive;  He will help us to do that no matter what the circumstance may be. We may not ever forget what happened, but we will finally be rid of  that misery of resentment that hurt us so badly and had also hurt God. God is love; it’s not easy for us to fully show Him our love, if we don’t show others that love as well. Let’s show Him the love that He deserves. Let’s ask Him today to help us forgive that offender and replace that hurt with the peace He offers us.

Let’s Pray:
Father God, thank You for forgiveness. Thank You for the forgiveness You give to us and for helping us to forgive others who have hurt us. No one is perfect except You, Father. Each one of us needs forgiveness and we need to forgive each other. Thank You, Lord, for this help today as we do this. You bring peace and love; You heal our broken hearts. You are a God of miracles and we are so grateful and praise You for all You do. We love You!  In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Your Assignment:
On a piece of paper, write down the 3 R’s. Start with that one person who has hurt you the most. Be honest and admit what you feel. Afterward, spend time in prayer asking God to help you release that person.

***************

If you would like to send a private email to Leslie in regards to this blog, please email her at: Leslie@GirlfriendsCoffeeHour.com

Filed Under: Victorious Healing Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , ,

Crazy Love: Week 6 / Chapter 6: “When You’re In Love” (pp 99-101)

February 11, 2013 by

life-measured-by-love-crazy-love-francis-chan-T

I love love.

Seriously…. I really do! I love being in love, thinking about love, matching people up I know will fall in love…I love everything about LOVE!  I’m one of  those insanely passionate head-over-heels-in-love-makes-you-sick-to-your-stomach-to-watch-in-movies kind of characters who would rather DIE than be apart from my true love.

I know, I know…. it’s enough to make you vomit, but THIS is how God made me so I’ve decided to embrace it! I really am this way about anything I feel strongly about.  I’m one incredibly passionate person and THANK GOD that also translates to my love of Christ…although I have been in seasons where I am sad to say this wasn’t always the case.

As a Christian life coach, I have seen firsthand how intimacy issues here in-the-flesh on earth can greatly affect our relationship with God. Typically, if we keep people at arm’s length and not ever let them in, this also translates to how we interact with God in our relationship with Him. This causes us to not want to spend every waking moment with Him, or crave our time with Him.  But rather only to go to Him when we have no other option and then pick and choose the areas of our life we want to open up to Him.

As dangerous as this is for our in-the-flesh people relationships, this will 100% keep you from the type of intimate relationship God calls us to through being a Christ Follower. He calls us to Crazy Love. In my passionate life, I have held things I “loved” in 2 categories…

1. Reverence

  • A feeling of profound awe and respect and often love; veneration.

2. Intimate

  • Marked by close acquaintance, association, or familiarity. Relating to, or indicative of, one’s deepest nature: intimate prayers. Essential.

This week’s chapter is all about examining the love we have for God.  I really like this thought-provoking quote from John Piper that Chan shared in today’s lesson:

“The critical question for our generation—and for every generation—is this:

If you could have heaven, with no sickness, and with all the friends you ever had on earth,

and all the food you ever liked, and all the leisure activities you ever enjoyed,

and all the natural beauties you ever saw, all the physical pleasures you ever tasted,

and no human conflict or any natural disasters,

could you be satisfied with heaven, if Christ was not there?” 

Well, could you?

This certainly has the potential to be a very convicting question for us to ask ourselves….

Blessings,

Megan 🙂

************

Let’s Pray:

Lord, help us today to yearn to be with You as often as we can and not ever want to live without You! Some of us are struggling with obtaining this passion love for You, Father, but we do want it! We need Your help and we thank You in advance for wooing us closer to You and helping us to finally be free of anything that is keeping us from having this deep passion for You! We thank You in advance for all You will do. In Jesus’ name we pray, Amen <3

You’re Assignment:

Balance in our relationship with God is important so that we don’t “humanize” God to the point that we infer the failures of humans on God.  How often do you think of God as more of a concept rather than a real person?  Which is more of a struggle for you:  intimacy with God or reverence for God?

************

If you are interested in joining this amazing online Bible study for Crazy Love, click HERE to sign up. Once you are registered, you will receive an email with further details.

If you would like to email a private message to Megan in regards to this blog, please email her at: megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com

Filed Under: Women's Ministry Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Life’s Healing Choices: Chapter 6 – Repairing Relationships (pp 167-171)

February 11, 2013 by

Choice 6:

Evaluate all my relationships.  Offer forgiveness to those who have hurt me, and make amends for harm I’ve done to others, except when to do so would harm them or others.

___________________________

LHC_Chapter6

This week we are going to look back at our inventory and learn how to repair the damage we have seen in our relationships.  Whether the damage was what we have done to others or what others have done to us, there is one way to repair—through forgiveness.

There are three reasons the book discusses why we should forgive others.

  1. Because God has forgiven you
  2. Because resentment doesn’t work
  3. Because you’ll need forgiveness in the future

Because God has forgiven you – Have you truly accepted God’s forgiveness?  I know for so long I felt I was not worthy of His forgiveness.  Have you accepted that Jesus’ death on the cross paid for all our sins? John 19:30 states Jesus exclaimed from the cross, “It is finished.”  No matter what our sin or how badly we have hurt others, God’s grace is sufficient to forgive completely.  Remember the woman who entered Simon’s home while he was having dinner with Jesus? She took an alabaster box of oil, washed His feet with her tears and anointed His feet with the oil.  When Simon criticized her, Jesus told him, “Therefore I say to you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven, for she loved much.  But to who little is forgiven, the same loves little” (Luke 7:47). Jesus then told her that her sins were forgiven and that her faith had saved her.  This woman knew her sins were great, but also knew the greatness of God’s mercy.  She had accepted His forgiveness and been set free.

Because resentment doesn’t work – This second reason to forgive is all about letting go.  Let go of the pain of the past hurts from others.  If you hold onto those hurts or resentments, they will hold you prisoner.  When you release them, you are free…the doors open and you walk out.

  • Resentment is unreasonable: Resentment can build up into anger.  When we are angry, the only person hurting is ourselves.   We lose sleep, we don’t eat, we overeat, we start becoming more tempted by the addictions that God had removed and we snap out at those around us whom we love.  Let Go and Let God!!
  • Resentment is unhelpful: Can all that we are holding onto really help anything now or in the future?  When we become stressed, it affects all our life—our work, our home, our friends, our loved ones.  Let Go and Let God!!
  • Resentment is unhealthy: The book likened resentment to cancer.  When I read that I went back to when I received the call I had cancer.  I had dropped 30 pounds in 30 days and could barely walk.  After many tests, they had diagnosed me with stage 3 cancer.  That call knocked my feet out from under me.  If resentment is like that I want it to be taken from me, just as God healed me of cancer.

Because you will need forgiveness in the future – There have been and will always be days when we are going to need God’s or someone else’s forgiveness.  When the book stated ‘you cannot receive what you do not give,’ that one statement hit home for me. If I do not forgive other’s I will not receive forgiveness.  So wait, if I do not forgive, I will not receive my Father’s forgiveness.  That is a hard one!  But when you look at it, like all other areas of our lives, we need to take that first step.  If there were 1,000 steps, then yes, God will take the 999 others to get to us, but we have got to take that first step.  To receive salvation, we had to ask.  To receive baptism, we had to believe.  To receive healing, we have to believe.  So to receive forgiveness, we have to forgive.

In my walk out of the alternative lifestyle, I did my inventory and made amends with many people.  You see, as others are making their inventory of how others hurt them, mine was on the other side.  I did much of the hurting.  My choices destroyed my relationships with family and friends.  My choices destroyed four marriages, including my own.  I broke off an engagement at the age of 19, left my husband later at the age of 27, lost custody of my oldest son ( he was 3) at the age of 28…see where I am going?  Although there were those that did hurt me, my laundry list was long.  So the forgiveness I longed for was much greater than any I had to give.

My asking for forgiveness from others was the first, and I had to admit, the easiest.  Sure, there were those that hurt me and I did forgive them, but the hardest parts of forgiveness for me were to accept God’s forgiveness and to forgive myself.  The guilt of my choices was really deep.  I had a difficult time accepting that God had forgiven me.  Through years of destroying relationships with my parents, siblings, friends, ruining marriages—anyone who tried to care was quickly tossed to the side.  After all of the hurt I had caused, how could God forgive me?  I was not worthy; I did not deserve His mercy.

Exactly! Mercy is undeserved merit.  Mercy is not earned, He freely gives it.  We serve an amazingly compassionate God. “For we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need” Hebrews 4:15-16.

His life on earth, death on the cross and resurrection to the right hand of the Father is the reason we receive His mercy for our past and grace for our future.  I had to step up to His throne and boldly receive His forgiveness.  It took some time for me to realize He died for me too.  When He said, “It is finished,” He meant for me, too.  If you are having a hard time accepting God’s forgiveness, try this.  Put your name in front or behind that statement Jesus made. “________, it is finished.”

Once I received God’s forgiveness, He began nurturing me to forgive myself.  Jesus wants an intimate relationship with us.  He wants us to bring all our burdens, hurts, guilt, and shame to Him.  I love The Living Bible translation of this verse, it make this so personal. “Come, let’s talk this over! Says the Lord; no matter how deep the stain of your sins, I can take it out and make you as clean as freshly fallen snow.  Even if you are stained as red as crimson, I can make you white as wool!  If you will only let Me help you” Isaiah 1:18-19.  ‘Come, let’s talk’–-I can visualize Jesus saying–‘grab your coffee, let’s talk.’  He made the heavens and the earth (in six days), He set the stars perfectly in the sky, He walked me out of the gay lifestyle. He healed my cancer. He gave me two miracles through my sons. He put joy in my life through my brother. He gave me amazing family and friends and He has allowed me to share His testimony of my life with all of you.  How can I not listen and accept His forgiveness?   I urge each one of you to step boldly before His throne.  Take that one step and He will take the 999.

Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.
Romans 8:1

_______________________________

Let’s Pray:

Father, we are so grateful to be able to talk with You.  To spend time with You.  Help us to take that one step toward forgiveness.  We admit there are times when it is hard, Lord, to forgive others, ourselves, or to accept Your forgiveness.  Help us to trust You when You say there is no condemnation, and that You will turn our sins as white as snow.  Father, You cannot lie and Your word says there is NO condemnation—we believe and receive that today.  Help us to walk in that, Lord, and be able to forgive and let go of any resentments we are holding onto.

Lord, as we go through this week, guide us to those we need to make amends with—let us talk when we need to and be quiet when we need to.  Open our hearts to hear from You and give us the strength and courage we need to take this step.  Heal our hearts from the hurts, Lord.  We love You, Father.  We give all the glory and honor to You.  In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Your Assignment:

When we are talking of forgiveness, which is hardest: Forgiving others?  Accepting God’s forgiveness? Or  forgiving yourself? (You can also go to our private Facebook page and share there, as well.)

__________________________

If you would like to send a private message to Laurie in regards to this blog, please email her at Laurie@girlfriendscoffeehour.com

Filed Under: Victorious Healing Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Captivating: Chapter 6 – Healing the Wound – Hemmed In (Pgs 92-98)

February 11, 2013 by

I’m sitting at my computer stirring my coffee, allowing the warmth, and the soft vanilla smell to wake me up on this beautiful morning. I had finished reading the first two sections of the chapter and the words are still working their way into my heart. There are times when I read the book that I will re-read, look up definitions, and look up Scriptures to help me understand what I’ve read. But this morning was different. As I was curled up in my favorite reading and writing spot—the corner of our love seat—the words I was reading were an echo of what God has been speaking to me for quite some time. Hiding wounds and building walls around them is something that I have, unfortunately, become very good at. Some wounds are old while others are still fresh.

I wasn’t letting anyone near these wounds, especially not God. These wounds were destroying my heart, they were starting to show in other areas of my life because I had set up walls, I had refused access. I was taking care of it.

God had to “thwart” me. He had to step in front of me and stop all my ways from working. This summer was the time in my life when I came back to Him, wounded and aching.

I want to clear something up first: I hadn’t strayed so far from Him that I was completely living in the world. I was still going to church regularly.  I was still being kind to others. I was still trying to live the good Christian life.  My wounds were well-hidden. To be wounded, and in need of God’s healing touch, does not mean you have to be the prodigal daughter, the one who has abandoned all of her childhood teaching to go explore the world.  It means that life’s hurts, whether self-inflicted or created by others, are hindering us from being the woman God created us to be.  They are stopping us from truly being ourselves.

These sections hold some very serious topics, it may even feel overwhelming to think of it all at once.  But, if anything is taken from these sections, please let it be these four words…

If you’ll let Him

 Isaiah 61:1-3

“The Spirit of the Lord God is upon Me,
Because the Lord has anointed Me
To preach good tidings to the poor;
He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted,
To proclaim liberty to the captives,
And the opening of the prison to those who are bound;
To proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord,
And the day of vengeance of our God;
To comfort all who mourn,
 To console those who mourn in Zion,
To give them beauty for ashes,
The oil of joy for mourning,
The garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness;
That they may be called trees of righteousness,
The planting of the Lord, that He may be glorified.”

*Healing. Releasing. Comforting. Providing. Bestowing. Joy-giver. Beautifier.*

We are told why Jesus has been placed on this earth, like the text says, it is not just to offer us salvation and then leave us to our own devices. He has come to continue to make us who we were designed to be. For this, I am so thankful. I am a work in progress. We are a work in progress.

Captivating_Ch6_Blog1This summer I turned to God broken and hurting and He was there to save me…but He is not done. Thank God! Despite our wounds, despite our hurts, despite the past that we as women carry He is not done with us and He will do everything it takes to rescue us and set our hearts free.  If we let Him, He can, will, and wants to be all of these things to us. If we let Him, He will make our hearts whole.

_____________________________

Let’s Pray:

Dear Heavenly Father, You told us that You came to heal our wounds, to make us beautiful, to free us. Thank You. We try to handle our wounds ourselves. We build walls, we hide them. Healing our wounds is a job for You, Lord. Please forgive us for trusting in our own methods more than trusting Your words, and Your heart. Please help us to take a step back and allow You in to those walled places, those places of pain. Please continue to mold us into the women You designed us to be. I pray for peace, strength, and joy, Lord.  In Jesus’ Name, I pray. Amen.

___________________________

Your Assignment:

What are your thoughts on these sections? What touched your heart?  What do you have questions about?

__________________________

 If you are interested in joining this online Bible study, please click HERE to sign up.  Once we receive your registration, we will email you further details.

If you are interested in sending a private message to Tonya, please email her at TonyaEllison@GirlfriendsCoffeeHour.com

Filed Under: Singles Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Captivating: Chapter 6 – “Healing the Wound”

February 10, 2013 by

Captivating_Ch6

 

I hope studying about the enemy’s ploys last week gave you another way of looking at your struggles and reminded you to keep putting on your armor .  Most importantly I hope it reminded you that there is always hope in Jesus!  I know that my thinking was challenged.  This week we start to work on healing our wounds.  I am looking forward to this more than you know.  Here are our reading assignments for the week:

Monday: Tonya – Healing the Wound – Hemmed In

Tuesday: Tonya – Turning From the Ways You Sought to Save Yourself – We Find Our Tears

Wednesday: Carissa – Forgive – Ask Him to Destroy Your Enemies

Thursday: Michelle –  Let Him Father You – A Deeper Healing

Friday: Edwina– Weekly Review

Saturday: Diane – Love Letters from God

LET’S PRAY

Father, we stand in expectation for what You have for us as we begin week 6. If we are struggling, help us to let our fears go.  We know that the enemy is trying to steal our joy.  We strive to live completely in You and for You.  Show us the lessons we can learn, and grow us in ways we can’t even imagine.  In Your Name, we pray.  Amen.

*******************

If you are interested in joining us for the “Captivating” Online Bible Study, please click HERE.

Once we receive your registration, we will email you further details.

Filed Under: Singles Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Crazy Love: Chapter 6 – “When You’re in Love” Reading Assignment

February 10, 2013 by

We are over halfway through our Crazy Love journey! It’s been a tough road, a nail-biter really. We’ve looked deep into our spirit to see what we need to work on. The journey may not be easy, but it will be worth it. God loves each one of us SO VERY MUCH. He doesn’t want to leave us where we are! He wants us to be the people He created us to be! But He cannot do it if we do not let Him! We have to let Him into those hurtful areas, those closed-off spots. That’s where His best work will be done.

So, let us begin chapter six. Ahh…love.. <3

Monday: Chapter 6 “When You’re In Love” pgs. 99-101/Kindle LOC 1268-1282  (Megan)

Tuesday: Chapter 6 “When You’re In Love” pgs. 101-103/ Kindle LOC 1282-1318 (Don’t Try So Hard) (Martha)

Wednesday: Chapter 6 “When You’re In Love” pgs. 103-109/Kindle LOC 1318- 1372 (Help! I Don’t Love You) (Jennifer)

Thursday: Chapter 6 “When You’re In Love” pgs. 109-111/ Kindle LOC 1372-1406 (Jesus: Servant, Not Beggar/SomeOne I Can Be Real With) (Donna)

Friday: Chapter 6 “When You’re In Love” Weekly Review and Chapter 6 Study Video from YouTube (Megan)

And here is a sneak peek video for you from our author! Enjoy and have a blessed day!

Let’s Pray:

Father, we want to be SO in love with You and not just the STUFF You offer us! Help us as we study this week. Reveal anything in us that is not pleasing to You and ignite a renewed passion in us for YOU and YOU alone. In Jesus name we pray, Amen!

Jennifer

If you are interested in joining this amazing online Bible study for Crazy Love, click HERE to sign up. Once you are registered, you will receive an email with further details.

If you would like to email a private message to Jennifer in regards to this blog, please email her at Jennifer@GirlfriendsCoffeeHour.com

Filed Under: Women's Ministry Tagged With: , , , , , , , , ,

Life’s Healing Choices: Chapter 6 – Relationships (pgs 166 – 203)

February 10, 2013 by

Choice 6:

Evaluate all my relationships.

Offer forgiveness to those who have hurt me and make amends for harm I’ve done to others.

LHC_Chapter6

Forgiveness isn’t based on a feeling. Think about it, do you ever feel like forgiving someone? Or do you ruminate over ways to get back at them, or hope they get what they deserve? We keep score. We tally up the wrongs and maybe consider what they did right. We spout out “vengeance is MINE” but we forget the last part, ‘Says The Lord.” (Romans 12:19)
This week in Life’s Healing Choices we’ll take steps to mend relationships. Now, this doesn’t mean we will magically have the Hallmark moments, grand reunions, tears of joy from our reconciliations. But it will bring freedom from the harbored emotions when we let it all go in to His hands.

Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.

Colossians 3:13 NLT

Now, if you had asked me at the time what good would come out of my failed marriages, I would have said nothing. Today, I can look back and see God’s guiding hand, bringing me to a healthier place in life. All because of His mercy & love.

When I met my ex-husband, I was ending a bad marriage and an affair … definitely NOT the time I should have been getting involved with anyone else. But he swooped down and took care of me by making me laugh, doing small things to show he appreciated me, surprised me with visits & phone calls. It was the romancing and wooing we all want. Looking back, I should have seen signs that things weren’t going to work out well. Friends joked that he had bad luck, nothing ever turned out well for him, etc. Sometimes he was the brunt of the jokes just because his choices usually led to poor outcomes. But he had explanations for everything (excuses, really), and I wanted the companionship too much to listen. At one point, his mother commented that I was the best thing to ever happen to her son, but she didn’t know what I saw in him. Wow … did I really just hear that from his mom? Hindsight being what it is, I wish I had explored that comment more deeply. Instead, I listened when he told me the relationship with his mom had been strained since his parent’s divorce and he was closer to his dad.

Fast-forward about 4 years and you’ll find us married, raising a new baby, juggling jobs with family life. We quarreled about his excessive time on the computer or role-playing games with friends. He was too distracted to really be a good husband or father. We had just purchased our first home together. Our jobs were solid with promising futures. I had finished a college program; he was just starting one. The bad times seemed justified by the stress around us.

Suddenly, in a flash, it all came crumbling down around me. In the blink of an eye, I learned of lies, inner demons, addictions, and secrets that he had been keeping from me … from everyone, really. This changed everything about my life without my knowledge, agreement or consent! But for the first time in my life, I didn’t blame God. I didn’t curse at Him, demanding to know what I had done to deserve this fate.  I turned to God. I cried out to Him with a desperation I had not felt before, because I knew He was always there for me.

I prayed to the LORD, and he answered me.

He freed me from all my fears.

Those who look to him for help will be radiant with joy;

no shadow of shame will darken their faces.  

Ps 34:4-5 NLT

During this time, I was embraced by a church community. I learned what God’s “peace that passes all understanding” truly feels like (Philippians 4:7). I learned to lean on Him. I learned to accept help from others around me. I learned to trust again. I learned to love again. I learned to forgive.
I read once that harboring anger, resentment and an unforgiving heart only hurts us. The other person goes on with their life, without a care in the world, completely oblivious to the fact we’re fuming and miserable. We may be angry, but it doesn’t affect their life any anyway. So until we learn to let it go, it continues to eat away at us, hardening our heart more and more with each passing day.

It wasn’t an easy process, I assure you. And, I can’t give a date when it happened. I just know that through the following years, my heart softened as I learned more about my identity in Christ. I accepted more that he needed God’s love more than I needed to hate him. At one time, his dad asked if I could help find a Bible for him. They were not believers or church-going people. Rather than tell them what to buy, or ignore their request, I went out and bought one myself. Yes, I bought a Bible for my ex-husband even after all the pain he caused. I realized that I didn’t want to face God one day and have Him say, “all I wanted you to do was give him a Bible, and you said no.” I was being asked to do a simple task, and I answered His call.  People ask me how I could forgive him for what he did to his family and friends. How could I not knowing the lengths God went to in order to forgive me? Romans 3:24 CEV

But God treats us much better than we deserve, and because of Christ Jesus, he freely accepts us and sets us free from our sins.

I stood before a judge and gave my testimony, something called a “victim’s impact statement.” I shared the details of that fateful day. I recalled the excuses and lack of responsibility my ex-husband displayed. And, I shared that I forgave him and how it was by God’s grace that I could stand before them that day. It was the last time I saw my ex-husband face to face. I will never forget the past, and there are days when the pain is still felt and the sorrow washes over me. But the good news is that I don’t harbor the resentment, the animosity … the hatred that initially consumed me. All credit for this transformation of my heart goes to God, and God alone.
This week, we’ll explore more on making amends.

Reading Assignment for Week 6: Chapter 6 of Life’s Healing Choices
Monday: Laurie will discuss Principle 6: The Relationship Choice
Tuesday: Leslie will discuss How do you forgive Others (& Self)?
Wednesday: Kim will discuss Repair by Making Amends
Thursday: Amy will discuss Make The Choice
Friday: Laurie will bring it all back home with a recap of our week

__________________________

Let’s Pray:
Lord, we cannot begin to thank You enough for the gift of Your forgiveness through Jesus Christ. To know You gave Your Son on our behalf gives us strength to extend grace and mercy to those who have offended us. It’s not an easy task, but it is something we strive for through our healing process. We know that letting go of the pain and resentment is necessary so that we can become more like You. Bless all who read and follow our study this week. Amen.

__________________________

Power Verses for Chapter 5:
Luke 6:31-37
Hebrews 10:24
Philippians 2:4
Romans 12:17-18
Matthew 5:23-24
1 Peter 5:10
Colossians 3:13
Romans 8:31
2 Corinthians 12:9-10

__________________________

If you are interested in joining us for the “Life’s Healing Choices” online Bible study, click HERE to sign up.

Once we receive your registration, we will email you further details.

If you would like to email Amy in regards to this blog, please email her at:

Amy@GirlfriendsCoffeeHour.com

Filed Under: Victorious Healing Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Seeking Him – With My Whole Self

February 9, 2013 by

Each Saturday we have been looking in-depth at a few of the most important aspects of having a dedicated, purposeful, intentional, devoted quiet time. This week in our current series, Seeking Him, we are continuing to look at this joy and privilege of our relationship with our heavenly Father—our quiet time alone with Him.

May I ask you to think about something for just a moment?   What are some of the things you do with your body as you spend time and seek Him?  A few that I pictured in my mind were:

  • we sit
  • we stand
  • we kneel
  • we lay prone
  • we raise our hands
  • we clap our hands
  • we walk
  • we lift our eyes

Perhaps you are thinking, “Oh, that is NOT for me, Coleen!  I am kind of reserved, y’know.  And besides, what might people think?!?”  Let me remind you, my friends, we are talking about YOUR quiet time with Your Father…most probably no one is around, right?

Let’s look at some examples given in the Scriptures of people who, using their bodies, gave voice to the cries of their hearts:

When Daniel learned that the document had been signed, he went into his house. The windows in its upper room opened toward Jerusalem, and three times a day he got down on his knees, prayed, and gave thanks to his God, just as he had done before.

Daniel 6:10

While Ezra prayed and confessed, weeping and falling facedown before the house of God, an extremely large assembly of Israelite men, women, and children gathered around him. The people also wept bitterly.  Then Shecaniah son of Jehiel, an Elamite, responded to Ezra: “We have been unfaithful to our God by marrying foreign women from the surrounding peoples, but there is still hope for Israel in spite of this.  Let us therefore make a covenant before our God to send away all the foreign wives and their children, according to the counsel of my lord and of those who tremble at the command of our God.  Let it be done according to the law.  Get up, for this matter is your responsibility, and we support you. Be strong and take action!”

Ezra 10:1-4

Then Solomon stood before the altar of the Lord in the presence of all the assembly of Israel and spread out his hands toward heaven.  He said, “O Lord, the God of Israel, there is no God like You in heaven above or on earth beneath, keeping covenant and showing loving-kindness to Your servants who walk before You with all their heart…

1 Kings 8:22-24

To you I lift up my eyes, O you who are enthroned in the heavens!  Behold, as the eyes of servants look to the hand of their master, as the eyes of a maidservant to the hand of her mistress, so our eyes look to the Lord our God, till he has mercy upon us.  Have mercy upon us, O Lord, have mercy upon us…

Psalms 123:1-3

O clap your hands, all peoples; Shout to God with the voice of joy.

Psalms 47:1

Then He said to them, My soul is very sad and deeply grieved, so that I am almost dying of sorrow. Stay here and keep awake and keep watch with Me.  And going a little farther, He threw Himself upon the ground on His face and prayed saying, My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass away from Me; nevertheless, not what I will [not what I desire], but as You will and desire.

Matthew 26:38 and 39

And there are so MANY other examples throughout the Scriptures to show us that it is a good thing to physically express our adoration…our praise…our love…our great need for our Awesome and Great God!  Just as Daniel, David, Ezra, Solomon, and our Lord Jesus Himself prayed and cried to God, they used their physical bodies to express their hearts to Him.

So may I please encourage you to get up!  Allow your body to be an additional part of your expression of  the words in your heart during your quiet time with your Father!

Love the Lord your God with all your heart,
with all your soul,
with all your strength,
and with all your mind
Luke 10:27

Our heavenly Father has required that we give Him all of ourselves.  True worship and praise comes from the heart.  If our worship does not come from our hearts, it will not matter what posture, or physical expression of our praise, we use.  God requires all of you!

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Keep seeking Him and enjoy your quiet time with your Lord!  As you seek Him, He will be found…He promises!

Jeremiah 29:12,13
Then you will call upon Me, and you will come and pray to Me,
and I will hear and heed you.
Then you will seek Me, inquire for, and require Me [as a vital necessity]
and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart.

Praying for each of you!  I know that the Lord will answer your heart’s cry as you are seeking Him with all your heart!

♥ coleen

______________________

If you would like to send a personal message to Coleen concerning the series, Seeking Him, you may email her at:  Coleen@girlfriendscoffeehour.com

Filed Under: Women's Ministry Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Love Letters from God ~ I am Yours and You are Mine

February 9, 2013 by

 

My story is made up of many love letters written from my heart to God’s heart, and from His to mine.  I open up to Him with a pen in my hand and a journal in my lap.  The Lord speaks to me through my writings and I am beyond excited to share with you bits and pieces of different letters I have from God.  I share parts of my story so that God’s love, power, grace, forgiveness, and His perfectness may be showcased.  As you read I pray the Lord grabs hold of your heart and fills you with hope!

Song of Songs 6:3

I am my lover’s and my lover is mine; he browses among the lilies

Dear Lord,

This year another Valentine’s Day will come and go and yet again I do not have a handsome man to be mine.  This will be the 24th year in a row I will not go to a fancy dinner, receive a box of chocolates, or get the chance to smell pretty flowers from a man who loves me.  Can I be honest with You, God…why?  I cry at the thought of feeling so alone.  What is it that is wrong with me that no man has ever wanted to be mine?  Am I not skinny enough, sweet enough, kind enough, social enough, anything enough?  Am I not all the right things at all the right times that a man sees as I’m driving in my car…working hard at work…staying fit at the gym…trying to find my way through the grocery store…worshiping YOU at church?  I sit here sometimes and just wonder what exactly it is that has kept me from being able to have a man call me his and for him to be mine too.  I remember that awful day that awful man told me I am his but he will never be mine.  Lord, I am scared I will never meet a man who will want to be mine.  Am I deserving of such a blessing?  Have I ruined my chances, what is it Lord, please help me.  All I know is I do not want to spend another day let alone another Valentine’s day feeling so alone.

 

Love Letters from God

Oh Precious Love of Mine,

I know that you know that you are not alone.  I am with you always holding you by your right hand.  Can you do Me a favor and please get rid of the lies that you are storing in your heart?  There is not one moment of any day that I am not with you actively seeking you to grow even closer to you.  I do not want you to feel alone; I want you to feel the love I have for you always.  It breaks My heart that you cry at the thought of not having anyone to be yours.  Am I not enough for you?  The truth is I am more than enough for you.  I know the desires of your heart; after all I am the One that has placed them there.  Trust Me that I have handpicked a man for you to be yours.  One who will want to pursue you with everything he has because he has learned from Me that is what you do when you love someone.  I love you and I am pursuing you daily, moment by moment even!  You have the luxury of being pursued and loved by Me every day of your life not just the single days.  These single days are here to spend loving time with Me.  Please take advantage of this Valentine’s Day.  I promise one day there will be a man who asks you to be his, but in that moment please never forget that I, too, am asking you to be Mine—this Valentine’s Day and every day in between for the rest of your life!

Yours always, God

 *****************

The One my heart has been longing for,

It is true over and over again—You truly are the Lover of my soul!  You are what I have been longing for.  You are what takes away this awful lonely feeling I do not want to feel.  Why is it so easy for me to forget that You are my heart’s only true satisfaction?  Anyone can bring me chocolates and anyone can buy me flowers, but no one can give me the priceless gift that You have already given me!  Your sacrifice and love for me is more than enough to fulfill all of my heart’s desires.  I will never forget the day I read in the Song of Songs that You are mine and I am Yours!  Words that were once used to hurt me, You used to mend my broken heart.  Valentine’s Day is not a day for single women to feel anger or bitterness towards all of the happy couples out there.  This Valentine’s Day I will choose to pursue You and be thankful that You are pursuing me too!  This is the day I will choose to not whine about what I do not have but accept and be thankful for what I have in You!  My most disliked day of the year will surely be my most liked day of the year as I spend every waking moment with You!  With a Valentine’s Day like that, I pray for Valentine’s Day every day!

Yours always, Diane

******************

Questions for Reflection:

  1.  What are you doing this Valentine’s Day?  Are you consumed with fear because you do not have a man on this day?  Are you going to choose to pursue the One pursuing you throughout this day and every day from now on?  Embrace the comfort knowing God is yours and you are His always!
  2. Spend time thanking God for all He HAS DONE and WILL DO for you!  As a lady in waiting, you can use this time to send a lot of thank you’s to God in Heaven for His PAST, PRESENT, and FUTURE blessings!

******************

If you would like to send a private email to Diane in regards to this blog, please email her at:

Diane@girlfriendscoffeehour.com

Filed Under: Singles Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , ,
« Previous Page
Next Page »