March 29, 2024

Sincere Love

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Little children, let us not love [merely] in theory or in speech
but in deed and in truth (in practice and in sincerity).
1 John 3:18 AMP

This verse always steps on my toes.  Today’s ‘me first’ mentality is encouraged and supported by society.  Yet, John 13:34 (HCSB) instructs us on what Jesus says we are to do:

“I give you a new command: Love one another.
Just as I have loved you, you must also love one another.”

My struggle with selfishness is a daily battle.  It is so easy to profess love.  But getting my actions to match my words is where the rubber meets the road.  Romans 12:9a (HCSB) states “Love must be without hypocrisy.”  OUCH!  Real love is demonstrated by deeds.  It requires a deliberate choice.  That choice doesn’t necessarily have to be monetary.  Encouragement and support cost nothing, except perhaps a little bit of time.  Sincere expressions of affection and labors of love show God’s love DOES dwell within us.

Galatians 5:13 (NLT) says we “have been called to live in freedom, my brothers and sisters. But don’t use your freedom to satisfy your sinful nature. Instead, use your freedom to serve one another in love.”  We have a choice to make—live in bondage to our selfishness or live in freedom by putting our love into action.  The decision seems to be an easy one but persevering is the real challenge.

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Abba Father, this is a struggle I cannot beat on my on. I truly want Your love to be seen in me by my actions and how I love. Please help me conquer my selfish desires so my expressions of affection will be sincere. In Your mighty name I pray – AMEN, It Is So!

Love With Actions

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This is how we know what love is:
Jesus Christ laid down His life for us.
And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters.
If anyone has material possessions
and sees a brother or sister in need
but has no pity on them,
how can the love of God be in that person?
Dear children, let us not love with words or speech
but with actions and in truth.
1 John 3:16-18 NIV

For the last few years our military men and women have been in other countries fighting for freedom.  Some have paid the greatest price—they have been killed in the line of duty.  Some of those who have served in the police departments and fire departments have also given their lives in doing their jobs.

Now we are hearing of people in the Church being martyred in other countries because of the persecutions occurring there.  This is what the verse is speaking of—“lay down our lives…”.  I pray that we would be brave and strong. And that we would stand up when we need to for our religious freedom.  That we would encourage our children to speak up when our God is being put down and not be embarrassed to speak about His glory.

When we see a brother or sister in Christ having trouble we should not hesitate to help them.  God will surely honor us in this act of kindness.   We will be changed when we do this.  We will understand the struggle of our fellow Christian as they share the struggle they have been through and we can usually offer sound advice. But we will be surprised at being blessed by the other person who shows how their faith has grown as they have gone through the struggle and hurt they have experienced.

“A new command I give you: Love one another.
As I have loved you, so you must love one another.
By this everyone will know that you are My disciples,
if you love one another.”
John 13:34-35 

As Jesus told us, we are to love one another and in doing so we show that we are His.  It is not about a competition to see who can do more, do better; it is about what is in our heart that makes a difference.  God is looking for those whom He has called to step up and bring the good news to everyone.

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Father, help us to reach out to those who are hurting and lost. Remind us to pray before we act to know what You want us to do to further Your Kingdom.  Reveal Your Word to us so we can know we are hearing from You, not ourselves.  We want to do what is right.  In Jesus’ name, amen!

Blessed Blessing

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May God be gracious to us and bless us and make His face shine upon us,
that Your ways may be known on earth, Your salvation among all nations.
Psalms 67:1-2

Everyone loves to be blessed.  People don’t typically wander around praying curses for themselves.  We, as Christians, have a Father who loves to bless. (Take a look at the Beatitudes in Matthew 5:3-12.)  Yes, our God is all about blessing His children!

Why?  He loves us.

Why else?  So we can bless others.

Ephesians 4:33 tells us that God forgave us, so we can forgive others.

And in John 13:34 we read that God loves us, so we can love others.

Romans 12: 6-8 speaks about the gift(s) we were given and how they should be used, “…if, it is serving, let him serve; if it is teaching, let him teach…” We don’t use our gift(s) for ourselves, but for others!

May God be gracious to us and bless us and make his face shine upon us,
that our ways may be known on earth, your salvation among all nations.
Psalms 67:1-2

When God blesses us, others see and can come to know Him; just like He promised Judah and Israel,

As you have been an object of cursing among the nations,
O Judah and Israel, so will I save you, and you will be a blessing.
Do not be afraid, but let your hand be strong,
Zechariah 8:13

And, of course, our Jesus leads by example.

…For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that though he was rich,
yet for your sake he became poor, so that you through his poverty might become rich,
2 Corinthians 8:9

So… what’s the “catch?” Deuteronomy 28:1-14 explains how obeying the Lord leads to blessings. In order to be obedient you must know His Word.  And to know His Word and apply it as intended you need to have a RELATIONSHIP with him.

So, what’s the “catch?” You are. God gets to have you in relationship with Him and that is what He has always wanted.

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Abba, thank You for blessing me.  Thank You for providing rewards for my obedience and discipline for my disobedience.  You have shown very clearly in Your Word the consequences of both.  Help me to be forever obedient that I may constantly reap the benefits of obedience and help me to keep my hands open to others, as I share what you have given me.  Help me to remember that my obedience doesn’t affect myself alone but those around me, as well.   In Jesus’ name.  Amen.

Life’s Healing Choices: Choice 6 – How do you forgive others and (self)? (pp 171-175)

If someone had told me two years ago that, in order for me to become well and be healed, I would have to forgive someone that I felt helped get me there in the first place, I would have laughed, and shaken my head ‘no.’  That is exactly what I did, too. Yeah right, I need to forgive someone who hurt me so badly? They are the ones who had broken my heart in so many ways and did not care at all about it, why should I forgive them?  …Because the Bible says you can’t receive what you are unwilling to give: I need to forgive because God has forgiven me.

So how on earth can we do this—forgiving others? Baker gives us the three R’s to show us how.

1. Reveal Your Hurt
2. Release the Offender
3. Replace Your Hurt with God’s Peace

I learned something very important a few years ago when I attempted to write my first resentment list. Turns out about 90% of the people on that list were loved ones. So how on earth can I love someone so much towards who I feel a great deal of anger, bitterness, hurt, and resentment? Baker states, “Perhaps it’s because we have a misconception that you can’t love somebody and be angry at them the same time. The truth is, you can.”

You can’t get over hurt until you admit the pain. Have you been able to do this? I have for years been able to tell my therapist, husband, and some family about people in my life who have hurt me. I have “on the surface,” talked about being angry, disappointed, and hurt by them. Truth is, I never really let myself be real and admit that deep pain inside completely to myself. I did not want to explore those feelings that I HAVE tried to cover up by instead replacing with negative feelings. I had become consumed with resentment over the unfairness of my life.

When I joined this ministry, the first thing I shared was my testimony. I have given my testimony at church about my hurts, hang ups, and habits. In my testimony, I spoke of relationships that hurt me deeply, scars and addictions that stayed with me and held me with chains. They affected me in the way I acted, the way I interacted with others, and the way I identified with who I am. But it was different in this testimony. I actually admitted to myself the truth—the hurt. It was wrong, and it hurt me.

In the beginning, it was not easy revealing my hurts. I felt so vulnerable for a while. It was not easy being honest and revealing the pain I have felt in some situations for over 30 years. I had tried to suppress my emotions for so long.  Doing so only made those hurts in me worse and I therefore became very angry inside. “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you” Ephesians 4:31, 32.

After revealing those hurts, it was time to release the offender. How on earth was that going to be possible? I had so much anger toward them that my heart was so hardened. I now understand that I can’t forgive them myself…I needed God’s help. With man it is impossible, but not with God. For all things are possible with God. Mark 10:27 ESV.  Not only does God want us to forgive, but He wants us to love our enemy who wronged us and hurt us. Whether the person asks for forgiveness or not, you do it for your own sake. I repeat, you release the offender for your own sake. The truth is there will be a time that you and I will need forgiveness in the future.

Let’s look at some things the Lord and His Word say about forgiveness and love. Jesus said, “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven” (Matthew 5:44, 45a). Yet Jesus tells us to love as he did.  “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another” (John 13:34 ESV).

John13_34

I would like to share with you how I was able to release my offender: I prayed for them. I had much difficulty doing so, but I prayed asking God to help me to even want to forgive them because honestly I did not want to. I did this for a while, and also added in my prayer that I hoped they would have a good day. I started small, but that was enough. God started chipping away at that anger and bitterness I held in my heart toward them. The more I prayed to be able to want to forgive them, the more I could pray to forgive them. Then honestly one morning I woke up to the most unusual feeling inside (that I now understand is peace). My heart for that person was softened and God replaced the bitterness with love. God gave me peace and allowed me to forgive. He released me from that hurt. It’s just one of the amazing miracles He does for us. When we listen and obey, He helps us to love and heal inside. By blessing those who curse us, doing well to those who hate us, and praying for them He also helps us to forgive and love them. I finally started to have compassion for this particular person because I was able to see that he, too, had been hurt in his life (hurting people hurt each other).

That peace I received on the inside had changed me in so many ways. I felt better, I was so proud of myself after finally admitting to myself the truth of how I felt. And through God, I finally loved instead of hated. That’s what God wants for us all. He wants us to love and forgive;  He will help us to do that no matter what the circumstance may be. We may not ever forget what happened, but we will finally be rid of  that misery of resentment that hurt us so badly and had also hurt God. God is love; it’s not easy for us to fully show Him our love, if we don’t show others that love as well. Let’s show Him the love that He deserves. Let’s ask Him today to help us forgive that offender and replace that hurt with the peace He offers us.

Let’s Pray:
Father God, thank You for forgiveness. Thank You for the forgiveness You give to us and for helping us to forgive others who have hurt us. No one is perfect except You, Father. Each one of us needs forgiveness and we need to forgive each other. Thank You, Lord, for this help today as we do this. You bring peace and love; You heal our broken hearts. You are a God of miracles and we are so grateful and praise You for all You do. We love You!  In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Your Assignment:
On a piece of paper, write down the 3 R’s. Start with that one person who has hurt you the most. Be honest and admit what you feel. Afterward, spend time in prayer asking God to help you release that person.

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If you would like to send a private email to Leslie in regards to this blog, please email her at: Leslie@GirlfriendsCoffeeHour.com