November 21, 2024

Girls with Swords: Chapter 13 Weekly Review – “Sword of Forgiveness and Restoration” (Contest Included)

June 21, 2013 by

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For the last few weeks, I have felt like a kid on Christmas morning as I unwrapped each gift God has literally placed in my hands.  He gave me a:

  • Sword of Harvest

  • Sword of Light

  • Sword of Song

  • Sword of Silence

  • Sword of Forgiveness and Restoration

My thanks to Lisa Bevere for helping me realize just how much God loves me.  Oh, you got the same bag of Swords?  Well, of course you did!  I feel a song coming on.  Sing it with me.

“Oh, how He loves you and me. Oh, how He loves you and me.
He gave His life, what more could He give.
Oh how He loves you, Oh how He loves me, Oh how He loves you and me!”

But, He did give more.  Not only did He give His life for us, but He gave us a bag of swords to join with Him on the battleground in which the enemy rages war against us.

Let’s go on down to the bonfire, and learn more about this Sword of Forgiveness and Restoration from my four girlfriends.  And BTW, don’t be in such a hurry to leave the bonfire tonight.  It is Bible Sword Drill Time.  You don’t want to miss it.  You will see the quiz questions below this review.  Answer the questions to the best of your ability, without using your Bible.  Submit your questions; we will announce the winner on SUNDAY, June 23rd!  

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Teresa

The concept of “stooping beneath” someone else is seen as subservient and undesirable.  Pride is prized above personal relationships.  Grudges are held until the reason for the anger can no longer be remembered.  Stubbornness and pride are not virtues in God’s economy; humbleness and forgiveness are.

Quoting Lisa:

  • We have to be devoted to a greater cause than our individual rights and opinions.
  • Though we are entrusted with a Sword of the Spirit, we are not armed to harm.
  • We do not fight to tear down, but to build up.  The authority heaven lends to us on earth is to destroy evil by doing good.

Someone will eventually need to “stoop” to show love.  Make 1 Corinthians 13 your guide as you break down family curses.

All have sinned and come short of the glory of God.  (Romans 3:23)

Jennifer

During a visit with her father, who was in a facility due to dementia, Lisa relates a story about God’s faithfulness. Lisa sensed that her father was fully cognizant of who she and her children were; and she prayed asking God what she should say. Here is the exchange:

  • “Heavenly Father, what should I say?”
  • The response was:  “Tell him he was a good dad.”
  • I countered, “That’s a lie! I am not going to lie to him…especially not now! He was not a good father.”
  • I heard a firm assurance: “He was as good as he knew how to be.”

If you are nurturing hurt from a broken relationship and God is prompting you to move toward restoration, listen to what He has to say and then act.  His timing is always perfect and He knows just what we need to say and do every time.

Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of malicious behavior.  Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.  (Ephesians 4:31-32)

Tonya  

As a Bereavement Counselor I have seen unforgiveness

  • lead to children not visiting their parent as they die
  • breed words of hurt and hate, open wounds that were thought closed, and cause those wounds to go unhealed…opportunities gone.

I have also seen forgiveness

  • build bridges, heal hearts, create new beginnings, new opportunities relationships restored and mended.

We don’t know what will happen after we pick up that sword of forgiveness and carry it with us on our journey. But what we do know is after we forgive, after we lay the issue at God’s feet and allow love to fill the space where the unforgiveness lived, that God will take over.  He will fulfill the promises He made regarding relationships before they were even formed.

Forgiveness – -whom the Son sets free is free indeed.

Kim

What is your story, dear friend?

  • Do you have deep wounds that still need healing?
  • Perhaps you have overcome and you are in a good place, but someone in your family is struggling and you are just at your end with it. The ripple effect is reaching everyone including your children.
  • Did your daddy love you and tell you how beautiful you were, or are you still begging for his attention?
  • Was your childhood stolen by someone who had no right to do so?
  • Maybe something happened in your life as an adult and you’re ashamed of the way you dealt with it.

Your story is full of opportunities to help someone else struggling. Only when we have let go of resentment and forgive can we be free.  As Lisa said:  “How might God use you as an agent of restoration?”

He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others when they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.  (2 Corinthians 1:4)

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Let’s Pray:  

Father God, we are so thankful that You gave Your life for us so that we might have a home in heaven with You.  But, we are also so thankful that You did not leave us stranded as the enemy tries to wage war against us here on this earth.  Help us look to You for guidance as to how and when to use the Sword You have given us.  In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.

 

 DON’T LEAVE YET!!  IT’S QUIZ TIME!!

 

QUIZ TIME

 

Filed Under: Women's Ministry Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Girls with Swords: Chapter 13 – “Sword of Forgiveness and Restoration” (pgs. 198-200)

June 18, 2013 by

God knows every one of us. He knows our past, our present, and our future. There is nothing that we can keep from Him: no secrets, no heartaches, no fears, no doubts, no lies. He is sovereign over all. We will never understand His ways because we cannot see what He sees. We cannot see into the hearts and minds of those around us. Our only job is to follow His leading… however difficult it may be.

The author’s story about her father is heart-wrenching. In our short section today, there is much to chew on, though. Up to this point, we have learned that this man may not have been the best father. He suffered with an alcohol problem, was dismissive of his family, and generally showed a lack of caring. Do we know what was causing all of these issues? No, but God does. He knows every detail of her father’s life. He knows his struggle, his pain, his heartache.

Plus, God knows what it will take to move the relationship forward.

During a visit with her father, who was in a facility due to dementia, the author relates a story about God’s faithfulness. Lisa sensed that her father was fully cognizant of who she and her children were and prayed, asking God what she should say. Here is the exchange:

“I lifted a silent prayer: Heavenly Father, what should I say?

The response was shocking and immediate: Tell him he was a good dad.

What? Stunned, I countered, That’s a lie! I am not going to lie to him…especially not now! He was not a good father.

I heard a firm assurance: He was as good as he knew how to be.”  (pg. 199)

Isn’t that the way of God? He tells us what to do, but His answers are often not the answers we want to hear. The things He makes us do are difficult and painful sometimes. Forgiveness is extraordinarily difficult, especially when we have been severely hurt by another person.

Yet … God knows how to mend those broken relationships. He is the Ultimate Healer and Fixer. His timing is always perfect and He knows just what we need to say and do every time. It may not make any sense to us, but to God, it makes all the sense in the world.

Can you imagine if the author did not heed God’s leading and speak those words to her father? We cannot spend another day living in regret of what we should have said or done. If you are nurturing hurt from a broken relationship and God is prompting you to move toward restoration, listen to what He has to say and then act. His timing is perfect and His plans are always good. He will not lead you astray. Holding on to those feelings of resentment and anger will only inhibit your relationship with the Lord. Release them. Release the person. Let God work it out. He wants to..you just need to let Him.

Eph4.jpg

Let’s Pray: Father, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, we pray for supernatural strength and boldness to take a step of faith in our broken relationships today. Help us, Lord, to move toward healing and restoration. Give us a heart of love and peace. Show us how to focus on the hope we have in You rather than on our bitterness and anger. We thank you in advance for this provision, Father. Amen.

Filed Under: Women's Ministry Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , ,

Life’s Healing Choices: Choice 6 – How do you forgive others and (self)? (pp 171-175)

February 12, 2013 by

If someone had told me two years ago that, in order for me to become well and be healed, I would have to forgive someone that I felt helped get me there in the first place, I would have laughed, and shaken my head ‘no.’  That is exactly what I did, too. Yeah right, I need to forgive someone who hurt me so badly? They are the ones who had broken my heart in so many ways and did not care at all about it, why should I forgive them?  …Because the Bible says you can’t receive what you are unwilling to give: I need to forgive because God has forgiven me.

So how on earth can we do this—forgiving others? Baker gives us the three R’s to show us how.

1. Reveal Your Hurt
2. Release the Offender
3. Replace Your Hurt with God’s Peace

I learned something very important a few years ago when I attempted to write my first resentment list. Turns out about 90% of the people on that list were loved ones. So how on earth can I love someone so much towards who I feel a great deal of anger, bitterness, hurt, and resentment? Baker states, “Perhaps it’s because we have a misconception that you can’t love somebody and be angry at them the same time. The truth is, you can.”

You can’t get over hurt until you admit the pain. Have you been able to do this? I have for years been able to tell my therapist, husband, and some family about people in my life who have hurt me. I have “on the surface,” talked about being angry, disappointed, and hurt by them. Truth is, I never really let myself be real and admit that deep pain inside completely to myself. I did not want to explore those feelings that I HAVE tried to cover up by instead replacing with negative feelings. I had become consumed with resentment over the unfairness of my life.

When I joined this ministry, the first thing I shared was my testimony. I have given my testimony at church about my hurts, hang ups, and habits. In my testimony, I spoke of relationships that hurt me deeply, scars and addictions that stayed with me and held me with chains. They affected me in the way I acted, the way I interacted with others, and the way I identified with who I am. But it was different in this testimony. I actually admitted to myself the truth—the hurt. It was wrong, and it hurt me.

In the beginning, it was not easy revealing my hurts. I felt so vulnerable for a while. It was not easy being honest and revealing the pain I have felt in some situations for over 30 years. I had tried to suppress my emotions for so long.  Doing so only made those hurts in me worse and I therefore became very angry inside. “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you” Ephesians 4:31, 32.

After revealing those hurts, it was time to release the offender. How on earth was that going to be possible? I had so much anger toward them that my heart was so hardened. I now understand that I can’t forgive them myself…I needed God’s help. “With man it is impossible, but not with God. For all things are possible with God.“ Mark 10:27 ESV.  Not only does God want us to forgive, but He wants us to love our enemy who wronged us and hurt us. Whether the person asks for forgiveness or not, you do it for your own sake. I repeat, you release the offender for your own sake. The truth is there will be a time that you and I will need forgiveness in the future.

Let’s look at some things the Lord and His Word say about forgiveness and love. Jesus said, “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven” (Matthew 5:44, 45a). Yet Jesus tells us to love as he did.  “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another” (John 13:34 ESV).

John13_34

I would like to share with you how I was able to release my offender: I prayed for them. I had much difficulty doing so, but I prayed asking God to help me to even want to forgive them because honestly I did not want to. I did this for a while, and also added in my prayer that I hoped they would have a good day. I started small, but that was enough. God started chipping away at that anger and bitterness I held in my heart toward them. The more I prayed to be able to want to forgive them, the more I could pray to forgive them. Then honestly one morning I woke up to the most unusual feeling inside (that I now understand is peace). My heart for that person was softened and God replaced the bitterness with love. God gave me peace and allowed me to forgive. He released me from that hurt. It’s just one of the amazing miracles He does for us. When we listen and obey, He helps us to love and heal inside. By blessing those who curse us, doing well to those who hate us, and praying for them He also helps us to forgive and love them. I finally started to have compassion for this particular person because I was able to see that he, too, had been hurt in his life (hurting people hurt each other).

That peace I received on the inside had changed me in so many ways. I felt better, I was so proud of myself after finally admitting to myself the truth of how I felt. And through God, I finally loved instead of hated. That’s what God wants for us all. He wants us to love and forgive;  He will help us to do that no matter what the circumstance may be. We may not ever forget what happened, but we will finally be rid of  that misery of resentment that hurt us so badly and had also hurt God. God is love; it’s not easy for us to fully show Him our love, if we don’t show others that love as well. Let’s show Him the love that He deserves. Let’s ask Him today to help us forgive that offender and replace that hurt with the peace He offers us.

Let’s Pray:
Father God, thank You for forgiveness. Thank You for the forgiveness You give to us and for helping us to forgive others who have hurt us. No one is perfect except You, Father. Each one of us needs forgiveness and we need to forgive each other. Thank You, Lord, for this help today as we do this. You bring peace and love; You heal our broken hearts. You are a God of miracles and we are so grateful and praise You for all You do. We love You!  In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Your Assignment:
On a piece of paper, write down the 3 R’s. Start with that one person who has hurt you the most. Be honest and admit what you feel. Afterward, spend time in prayer asking God to help you release that person.

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If you would like to send a private email to Leslie in regards to this blog, please email her at: Leslie@GirlfriendsCoffeeHour.com

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