April 18, 2024

Lady in Waiting: Developing Patience


Have you ever heard the phrase “Patience is a virtue”?  Well, curious-little-me decided to look up where that saying came from.  As it turns out, there is an entire list of 7 heavenly virtues (to counter the 7 deadly sins).  This list is derived from the Psychomachia (“Contest of the Soul”), an epic poem written by Aurelius Clemens Prudentius (c. AD 410). These 7 virtues include: chastity, temperance, charity, diligence, patience, kindness, and humility.

Aurelius made a pretty good list, but I think he plagiarized or perhaps he drew some inspiration from Galatians 5:22-23:  “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness self-control; against such things there is no law.”

So how can we develop these virtues?  How can we develop the virtue of patience?

I believe that if we ask the Lord to help us develop the fruits of the Spirit (patience being one of them) then He will give us situations and opportunities in which we can develop our requests.  It’d be nice if He would just zap us down some “instant patience,” but that’s not how He works.  And what a blessing! He’s given each of us that opportunity RIGHT NOW! We can practice and develop our patience now in our singleness so we may glorify Him wherever He may lead us in the future.

I want to draw your attention to three points made by our authors:

  • Marriage is not a need.
  • Marriage is not a right.
  • Marriage does not complete a person.

As I write to you, I cannot tell you that I will ever get married.  To be honest, God may not have that in His plans for my life.  And I must be okay with that possibility.  Ask yourself if you are truly okay with that possibility.  Have you turned your desire for marriage and a spouse completely over to God?  This is a daily submission for me.  “Lord, go before me today, and carry me through.  I want to do Your will today; I want to live the life You’ve planned and be the person You’ve created me to be.”

God put a verse on my heart this week to share with you, dear Ladies in Waiting.  Romans 8:37-39:  “Now, in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us.  For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present (singleness) nor things to come (either more singleness or marriage), nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

WHAT A PROMISE!  Jesus is our Husband and absolutely nothing can separate us from His love!  Not even ourselves, our impatience, our earthly desires, or our temptations can separate us.  As we wait, let us focus on our love relationship with Him.  His love is never-failing and never-ending!


In love,

Carissa

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Let’s Pray:
Heavenly Father, we know and trust that Your ways are higher than ours.  Help us to trust in Your plans and Your timing for the desires of our hearts.  Lord, make our desires to be Your desires.  Father, grant us a spirit of patience as we wait upon You.  Father, thank you for Your perfectly constant and completely fulfilling love.  We love you, too, Father.  In your precious Name, Amen.


Your Assignment:

I have two questions for you.  Answer whichever you prefer – or both!  

  • Do you consider marriage a “goal” for your life, and do you think it should be? As a Lady in Waiting, what should be our goal?
  • How are you developing a patient heart? Share your experiences and strategies with us!

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Our Next Single Women’s Online Bible Study

“Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul”

by John & Stasi Eldredge

Begins January 6, 2013

To sign up for this Online Bible Study, click HERE and follow the instructions. You will also be given a link to where you can purchase this bible study. We’re looking forward to studying “Captivating” with you!!
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Lady in Waiting: Meditations

“You are my daughter.” “You are a priestess.” “You are a child of the Most High God.”

“Quiet your heart and rest.” “My child, I love you.”

The times that I wait to listen for the Lord’s voice are few and far between, but these are some of the words he has spoken when I have asked. And these words from the Lord have meant the world to me. When I take the time to meditate on his word, when I seek him in prayer, when I journal, and when I wait for his responses, I begin to build a deeply intimate relationship with the God that I love. I get to know the God of Scripture, rather than simply the God I have been told about or have decided he was. I hear his heart for me and I learn when he aches for me.

Meditation on the Lord is not an easy feat. It is hard to rest, relax, and shake the things of this world out of your mind, in order to hear the Lord’s voice better. The competing and often opposing words of the world sometimes shout into your ear as you wait on him. And the enemy longs to convince us that the things we are hearing are simply not true. So, how do we know they are from him, and not just made up in our minds? We turn to Scripture to learn about who God is, and the promises he has made to us. Here are some of the verses affirming the gentle whispers that the Lord has spoken to me:

“Some of the tree’s branches were pruned and you wild olive shoots were grafted in…” (Romans 11:17a The Message)

 

“But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.” (1 Peter 2:9 NIV)

 

“He says, “Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.”” (Psalm 4:10 NIV)

 

“For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:38-39 NIV)

The times that I actually wait to listen for my Lover’s voice are few and far between. Yet I rarely shut out the voices of all the lovers of this world; rather, I hold their opinions and thoughts to quite a high standard. But the only way to differentiate our Lover’s voice from the voices of those around us is to know Scripture. Find a devotion plan that will help you to work through the books of the Bible at a pace that is good for you. Find a quiet place where you will not be bothered (this could even be a coffee shop or a book store with a reading space if you fear you will be bothered at home!) Take a journal, and take notes of the verses that stand out to you. In your prayer time, ask the Lord to engrave these things on your heart.

If you are having trouble focusing or hearing the Lord, write down everything that is distracting you from him and decide that those are not things you are going to focus on for the next half hour. The enemy wants those distractions to come up, but our God desires our heart even more. Ask the Holy Spirit to come into this time with you and protect you from the attacks of the enemy.

What would the Lord have to say to you if you took the time to hear? What gentle reminders would he whisper into your ear? What convictions would he strengthen, what sorrows would he quiet, and what desires would he quench? I ask myself these questions today, just as I am asking you. Our Heavenly Father has plenty to say, if we open our ears, put our talking on pause, and listen!

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Let’s Pray:

Heavenly Father, I ask right now that you would cleanse our minds from the things of this world. We long to meditate on your word so that we can know you deeper. As single women, we know that we have even more time now than we ever will to get to know you intimately. Give each of us the mind of Christ, to hear your voice. Holy Spirit, protect us from the attacks of the enemy that keep us from hearing you. Engrave you Word on our hearts, Lord. We love you. Amen.

Your Assignment:

When was the last time you spent more than 15 minutes talking with God? To be completely honest, I have made many excuses to not spend time with him because of how early I get up for work. Put those excuses away! This is the most important relationship you will ever, ever, ever have! Let’s sit down and look at our schedule for next week. Find a time on each day that you can get quiet with God. Read Scripture for 30 minutes, and then spend time praying and listening to him for 30 minutes. I’d encourage you to take a journal and write down anything he says!

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For the “Lady in Waiting” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!

Lady In Waiting: To Tell the Truth

Today’s blog is brought to you by Katie Blumberg

It was young adults ministry night and I was nearly certain that he was going to be there. You know, the man I was going to marry. Yep. I already knew who he was, I just had to figure out a way to get his attention and keep it. So as I straightened my hair I plotted out what I would say when I saw him. I did not want to seem too interested and at the same time did not want to ignore him entirely. But if I could figure out just the perfect, adorable, flirty but not sexy things to say, I was certain he would be hooked. On goes the makeup that I don’t usually wear. And where did I leave that adorable button-up top and my favorite flats? Finish with lipstick and slap on a smile, grab my bible and notebook and I am off to meet my destiny.
Have you been there? Found yourself so wrapped up in the idea of seeing your dream-man (or meeting him for the first time) that you become everything but yourself in the midst of it. Your entire focus is on this man, that you may or may not even know well enough to give him such devotion. You may be doing things that, on the outside, seem like they are for the Lord. Going to ministry events. Working or volunteering at the church. Helping out in the youth ministry. Joining a small group. Etc., etc., etc. Don’t get me wrong – these are all really great things to get involved in – but check your motive. If you are not doing this solely for the Lord, you may be involved in the wrong group or ministry.
So here are some questions to ask yourself if you really are not sure about your motives for getting involved in ministry: If that special guy was not going to be there, would you still want to put time and effort into it every week? If you never ended up with this guy, would his friendship still be of value to you? Is this something that the Lord is calling you to do, or are you in it because there is a possibility of meeting your future husband? Are you involved in ministries that include other single women, married women, couples, and brothers and sisters of all ages?
If you can answer these questions by honestly saying that he Lord’s will is your greatest interest, then kudos to you! You are on the right track, Sista!! But if you examine your motives and find that, in your most honest moment, some of the ministries you are involved in would not be a part of your life if that special man were not around, maybe you ought to re-examine your commitment to these things.
So, back to that special night that I was preparing myself for. I arrived (classically late, as always), found a couple of friends to sit with, and began scanning the room. No sign of him yet, but he’ll be here. The message began and I pulled out my bible and notebook to follow along. Still not there. I even left an extra seat open just in case he arrived. No such luck. I spent the entire night eagerly looking to the door at every stir I saw in the corner of my eye. I missed the message that was spoken, couldn’t concentrate through any of the prayers, and did not even involve myself in the question and answer time or small group conversation. The entire evening I spent either excitedly waiting to bat my eyes at dream-boy, or wallowing in my disappointment that I had gotten dressed up for nothing, yet again.
When checking my heart on my motives for this night, I realized that they were all wrong. I was not involving myself in this ministry because I wanted to draw closer to the Lord. I was not in it in order to grow, I was in it because I wanted an opportunity to meet a man. I wanted to take, not learn how to give.

What are your motives?

Let’s Pray:
Heavenly Father, we thank you so much for your grace and mercy. Thank you that you know our hearts better than we know them, and we praise you for loving us even still! Please help us to honestly assess our hearts and our motives for the things we do. Change our hearts to desire your will for us, and to stop inserting our own will. Give us peace as we wait for the man you have set apart for us, and help us to become more and more like you each day. Amen.
Your Assignment:
Honestly assess yourself based on the “test” on pages 58 and 59 of the book Lady in Waiting. You don’t have to share your exact results, but in all honesty, do you fall more on the side of pursuing the Lord, or on the side of pursuing a husband? If so, ask that the Lord would reveal to you how you ought to change that.
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For the “Lady In Waiting” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!