March 29, 2024

16 Day Love Challenge: Chapter 5 – Love is not Proud

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Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
1 Corinthians 13:4

In this verse, we are first told a bit about what LOVE is—LOVE is patient and kind. Earlier this week, our sisters Cherie and Rebecca (the authors of The 16 Day Love Challenge: Matching our Words and Actions with 1 Corinthians 13:4-8) encouraged us to honestly and bravely ask God to show us if we really are patient and kind women. We looked at the state of our own hearts to see how impatience had cost us in our relationships and if we were really willing to “be kind no matter what!”  I, myself, love these challenges; how about you?

Then we see two things that LOVE is not—LOVE does not envy or boast. Again, Cherie and Rebecca prompted us to search our hearts and seek God’s help in dealing with any and all areas of envy and boasting. Because they are sin…enough said, yes?

Now here we are at the end of Verse 4 where the Scriptures tell us “LOVE is not proud.” Now this is not talking about the kind of pride where a momma is ‘bust my buttons’ proud over the accomplishments of her little ones. Nor is it the type of pride that we are to sing “I am proud to be an American where at least I know I’m free!” Nor is it the kind of pride my young grandson has when he stands up during circle time and—from cover to cover—reads a book to his classmates without a stumble or a falter. Nor the pride we boast of when we proclaim and exclaim over the power of Jesus’ Cross.

No, this pride talked about in Verse 4 is NOT good. This pride is “the absence of love.” Wow! Not where we want to be, hmmm? As Cherie says to us, “…Pride has invaded your heart and separated you from your husband, friends, co-workers, neighbors, family members…” But there is great HOPE! Listen…

But He gives more grace. Therefore it says, “God is opposed to the proud, but gives grace to the humble.”  Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He shall lift you up.
James 4:6, 10

alright, quick now: what DOES humility mean?
From Webster’s 1828 Dictionary
Lowly; modest; meek; submissive; opposed to proud, haughty, arrogant or assuming. In an evangelical sense, having a low opinion of one’s self, and a deep sense of unworthiness in the sight of God.

So, to paraphrase, if one is humble or has humility, then they are modest, submissive, with a deep sense of unworthiness compared to God (and, to a lesser extent, compared to others also).

In closing, consider this section from 1 Peter 5:5-7:

You younger men, likewise, be subject to your elders; and all of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, for God is opposed to the proud, but gives grace to the humble. Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxiety upon Him, because He cares for you.

From these verses, we see four motivations to be humble:

  • God is opposed to the proud. Could there be anything worse? God opposed to you? So don’t be proud.
  • God gives grace to the humble. Could there be anything better than to have your awesome God treat you so graciously. He does that to the humble.
  • God exalts the humble: Under His mighty hand, God will exalt you at the proper time.
  • God cares for the humble: So give to Him all your worry, care, concern, because He cares for you.

May I encourage you (me, too!) to be a humble person because, if you are proud, God will be against you in your pride; but if you are humble he will give you grace, exalt you in due time, and care for you along the way so that you don’t have to be anxious.

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Here are a few other verses to help hide God’s Word regarding humility in your heart:

Proverbs 15:33   The reverent and worshipful fear of the Lord brings instruction in Wisdom, and humility comes before honor.

Zephaniah 2:3   Seek the Lord, all you humble of the land, you who do what he commands. Seek righteousness, seek humility; perhaps you will be sheltered on the day of the Lord’s anger.

Ephesians 4:1-3 Therefore I, the prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk worthy of the calling you have received, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, accepting one another in love, diligently keeping the unity of the Spirit with the peace that binds us.

Philippians 2:3   Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves…

Colossians 3:12 and 13   Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, 13 bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other;

1 Peter 5:5   Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.”

Esther – Chapter 6:4-9

Esther 6:4-9

So the king said, “Who is in the court?” Now Haman had just entered the outer court of the king’s palace to suggest that the king hang Mordecai on the gallows that he had prepared for him. The king’s servants said to him, “Haman is there, standing in the court.” And the king said, “Let him come in.” So Haman came in, and the king asked him, “What shall be done for the man whom the king delights to honor?” Now Haman thought in his heart, “Whom would the king delight to honor more than me?” And Haman answered the king, “For the man whom the king delights to honor, let a royal robe be brought which the king has worn, and a horse on which the king has ridden, which has a royal crest placed on its head. Then let this robe and horse be delivered to the hand of one of the king’s most noble princes, that he may array the man whom the king delights to honor. Then parade him on horseback through the city square, and proclaim before him: ‘Thus shall it be done to the man whom the king delights to honor!’”

Oh, pride…that little five letter word that I have truly grown to dislike.  A word that has proven to hurt so many lives, ruined so many relationships, guided so many down paths harder than they should have been. Pride doesn’t discriminate; it touches the work place, the home, the church, it wraps itself around our hearts and makes life a difficult place.

Googling verses on pride, I found many more than the word count of this blog will allow.

  • I will break down your stubborn pride.  Leviticus 26:19
  • He grew proud, to his destruction. For he was unfaithful to the Lord his God.    2 Chronicles 26:16
  • In his pride the wicked does not seek Him; in all his thoughts there is no room for God.  Psalm 10:4
  • When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.  Proverbs 11:2
  • Pride only breeds quarrels, but wisdom is found in those who take advice. Proverbs 13:10
  • Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.  Proverbs 16:18
  • A man’s pride brings him low, but a man of lowly spirit gains honor.  Proverbs 29:23
  • But when his heart became arrogant and hardened with pride, he was deposed from his royal throne and stripped of his glory.  Daniel 5:20
  • Your heart will become proud and you will forget the LORD your God.  Deuteronomy 8:14
  • Though the LORD is on high, He looks upon the lowly, but the proud He knows from afar.  Psalm 138:6
  • The LORD detests all the proud of heart. Be sure of this: They will not go unpunished. Proverbs 16:5
  • Better to be lowly in spirit and among the oppressed than to share plunder with the proud.  Proverbs 16:19
  • Before his downfall a man’s heart is proud, but humility comes before honor.  Proverbs 18:12
  • Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  1 Corinthians 13:4

I would be lying if I tried to say that I haven’t had an issue with pride.  I like being able to do everything myself and I don’t like asking for help and I don’t like admitting that I am wrong.  I had the thought that doing these things made me weak.  They made me less of a woman, less of a wife, less of a mom.  I should be able to handle it all.  I have the skills, the know-how and the desire.  This is pride in a different sense than what Haman showed; but it is pride none-the-less.

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When these thoughts of pride and inadequacy creep in I remind myself that I have not been doing this without God and that I cannot continue to do this without God.  We are not created to do things alone, to walk our paths alone, we can only do it with God on our side. This is where Haman fell short; he thought that he alone reached the position he was in, he thought that no other man could be held in such high regard as him. His pride was his downfall.  I don’t want to see this in my life and I don’t want to see it in yours.

It’s wrong to be proud of our accomplishments. I don’t think it’s wrong to think that we did a good job at something.  But we need to remember to give honor where honor is due.

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Let’s Pray:

Dear Heavenly Father, You bless us daily. You give us skills and talents that allow us to accomplish tasks, to succeed in this life. Lord, please forgive us for the times where we allow pride to take over, for the times when we fail to thank You.  Give us a gentle reminder when our pride starts to get too big, when we look to ourselves, and forget to look towards You.

In Jesus’ name we pray.

Amen.