No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.
Roman 8:37
When we are going through a tough time in our lives, it is so easy to just focus on the problem and not the blessing God is trying to show us, or the lesson he would like us to grasp. Sometimes it makes us feel better to dwell on the problem. Tell everyone that will listen how bad things are for us and hope we’ll get some sympathy. But how far does that really get you? You get to hear the “oh, I’m so sorry’s” and the “boy, you sure do get your dose of bad luck” but do those words really solve your problem? Do they make you feel better? Maybe for a minute. But then what? The answer is God dear sisters. If you can take your mind off of your troubles, and instead focus on what God really has in store for you, you can do all things through Christ who strengthens you. Philippians 4:13.
Since you are a member of this study, most likely your biggest problem is your unsaved spouse. You have spent so much time praying for him, thinking of ways you can get your husband to see the light, talking to other girlfriends asking their advice on what to do next. God wants you to stop and refocus your attention on Him. Go to Him with your troubles, ask His advice and then know that He will work on it. It may not be the next day or even the next month, but, you must have faith that God is working. Only then will you find peace.
Like the title of this section suggests, just because you know you are blessed, doesn’t mean it’s going to be easy! It is hard to just trust God, but try thinking of it this way, you know God is in you, right? If God has peace, shouldn’t you? Of course you should. Does God have doubt? No! So you shouldn’t either. Once you start going down that path of doubt, stress and anxiety, stop yourself and say “God is in me, if He has peace, so do I.”
Another way to deal with a trial is to rejoice in it. WHAT? Yep! Be happy God is putting you through a tough time to prepare you for great things. He is making you grow. Going through something hard is God’s way of showing you He is working on your problems and if you will obey His word and patiently trust Him during that tough situation, when the time has passed, you will come out on the other side stronger and blessed beyond your wildest dreams. If we chose to stay where we are, wallowing in our self-pity and not wanting to see hope, we miss out on the revelation God is trying to show us. Instead of being limited, trust God and be unlimited.
“There is purpose in your pain.” Those are the words God gave to Dineen when they were watching their daughter fight cancer. Wouldn’t it had been easy for Dineen’s family to just sit and question God and even be angry to allow their daughter to suffer through such a horrible disease? Sure. But when she heard the words “there is purpose in your pain” it had to be a relief to her. There is comfort in knowing you are not being put through something so horrible for nothing. I bet we can all look back on our lives and think of a struggle we’ve been through that just seemed unimaginable at the time, but once we were on the other side of the mountain, we were able to see why God took us through it. There is always a purpose. It is so important to remain faithful to God. If we do, we will be so blessed. In our marriage, in our finances, in our parenting. Faithfulness in God brings nothing but blessings.
Dineen says sometimes a mismatched marriage can feel like the fiery furnace like the one Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego went through. But those men kept their faith that God was right there in the middle of it with them and he delivered them without even a hint of smoke on their clothes. God is with you too in the middle of your mismatched marriage. He IS bringing you through it. Just keep your faith. I agree with Dineen when she says, “the key is to stop seeing our mismatched marriage and our husband as problems to be solved and accept both as blessings to be enjoyed.” That is not normally what people do in the natural, is it? But to quote another smart person, Dr. Phil, “how’s that workin’ for ya?” Seriously. How well has it been working for you to think of your husband and your mismatched marriage as a problem. The same can be said on any problem you dwell on. It doesn’t help or fix the issue. But if you can turn your thinking around and see it through God’s eyes, wow. Look out because your whole demeanor is going to change. You will be happy, worry free, stress free. Doesn’t that sound fantastic? I have started to do this in many areas of my life and the transformation in me was almost instantaneous!
I apologize for continuing to quote Dineen, but she has written this section so well and there are so many great nuggets I took away from it, but I am going to leave you with her final thoughts in this section.
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“We discover the ability to laugh and appreciate special moments despite imperfect conditions, and, most importantly, we learn that we are not responsible for the results. God is.” Isn’t that a freeing thought?! You don’t HAVE to be miserable because your husband isn’t saved. You can be happy, you can enjoy him and see him as a blessing like you did when you first met. When you do, you will feel that peace God has already given you. It is just up to you to tap into it!
Let’s Pray:
Dear Lord, it is so easy for us to get caught up in our troubles and not want to see the joy in our suffering. Sometimes we want to throw the mother of all pity parties and invite everyone we know. Please speak loudly in our hearts during these times and remind us that you have already supplied us with all the tools we need to make it through any trial or struggle. You have given us joy, hope, faith and peace. Nudge us through our tough times and from now on we will keep our focus on You. You are our greatest blessing. We love you Lord. In Jesus precious name, Amen.
Your Assignment:
Sometimes when I am going through a tough time and start sliding down into the self-pity pit, I will make a list of my blessings. When you count up all that God has given you, it makes it easier to see how awesome our God is and to be reaffirmed He has worked wonders in your life. Please list below your blessings. I won’t put a certain number on it, I’ll leave the length up to you. Let’s show God how grateful we are!
Godspeed,
Sarah
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For the “Winning Him Without Words” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!
About Sarah Boyer
sarah, as i was reading your sweet words and thoughts, i said, 'how cool is this, Father?!? sarah's blog today is all about encouraging us to remember, and think on, and be thankful for our blessings! we are beginning a 'thanks-filled journal' on the fellowship page today…and these two tie in beautifully! God is so good to us!
i will start my list with 'i am so thankful for God and His Word!' and add, 'i am so very thankful to God for directing my steps to GCH!!' <3
Oh Coleen! I know what you mean! As soon as I was done writing this, I saw so many little notes and verses that all reminded me to count my blessings!! Love affirmation!! God is SO great!!
I love your words today, Sarah! And what a wonderful way to bring in November… a time when we set aside a day just to give thanks to God! I must say, you gave me warm fuzzies and some wonderful memories came flooding in when I read the words, "Please list below your blessings." The song "Count Your Blessings" popped in my head (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nS0UvnWYtA8) Anytime I hear Bing, I think of my dad, and what a blessing he was! <3 God has blessed me abundantly with a wonderful family who gave me the best childhood I could ask for, a loving husband, two smart, gorgeous daughters, a beautiful home, a yearning to grow more in Him everyday, my beautiful Bible so I'm able to read his Word every day, a need to create, the ability to see beauty in things that people otherwise take for granted… I could go on and on. Life isn't always rosy, and there are certainly things that are sometimes hard to bear, but He's blessed us with peace and joy, so that even in hard times, we can praise Him, knowing that there is a reason.
Beautiful, Shandy!! I love your blessings list!! Once you get started, it is easy to start seeing all the blessings around you, isn't it!
Sarah, I confess that there are many times that I tjhink "When he gets saved, our life will be much happier." As you and Dr. Phil says, "it doesn't work well for me." I give thanks today for this journey with my husband; there is purpose in it, and I thank God for it.
I agree, Martha. My husband is a believer, but there is always a part of me that wants him to go deeper…having him pray with me is my biggest hope. Although I believe our life would be a lot more peaceful and fulfilling if he did pray with me, that one hope can't make me blind to all the other qualities I love about him. His kindness, his gentleness w/our children his hard work ethic. They are all things I am thankful my husband has within him. 🙂
Love this post today, Sarah. I do sometimes think "I'll be happy when … " but God has already supplied me with every tool to just BE happy. It is up to me to use them! Great insight.
As for the blessings list… I am thankful for so many things.. my husband, my family, laughter, good food, sunshine, my dogs, my home, my job, … I could go on and on. Thank you for showing me that I need to remember these things amidst the struggles!
I think a lot of people don't realize that we already have those tools, Jennifer! I think it is SO wonderful to discover that and then start to put them to use!! God is in YOU! Be so happy about that!!
Love your blessings list!!
Accidentally posted my comment in the wrong place before. So I open this with an apology for anyone who reads this more than once. Plus, this will be am abridged version.
I am grateful for my life/survival; for my mother asking me to move; for my husband's children; and, for my sister, Christi, for reintroducing God into my life.
The other version was more expressive, but you guys get the gist! 🙂
All wonderful blessings, Mandi! Thank you for sharing! <3
AMAZING post today Sarah! I cannot believe the ways God is showing me little lessons! I was just reading Psalm 22 this morning and tying into the book of Job, praising God in the storm. WHOA. And then your blog…perfectly wonderful! I am feeling completely and totally loved by my Abba today, in spite of struggles and stress. 🙂
My blessings are so numerous, my hardworking hubby, my beautiful, smart children, a roof over our heads, clothing, food for our tummys, my parents, my siblings, etc etc….Most importantly my Fathers love and Jesus sacrifice to take my punishment and offer me eternal life! How can I do anything but praise HIM? Nothing can compare to His love, nothing! <3 Thanks for being the cherry topping of my blessing lesson today! 🙂
Thank YOU for sharing all that God has shown you! There is nothing better than affirmation! And your positive attitude is what will take you through any storm!
WOW so many things I am blessed with beginning with God as my Lord..my husband..my two children, my son-in-law, my red Bible (oh how much I love it), my time with Him, and this is just the beginning, overflowing blessings every moment of my life, everyday of my life and even when a bad moment pops us I can still find a God blessing waiting on me from it….thanks Lord for being constant in my life!
Excellent, Beverly! To be able to always see the blessing in bad moments is so huge!! It really does make tough times easier!
Sarah thanks so much for your wonderful words! My blessings list: my Lord and Savior, my bible, my husband, our 3 boys, 2 daughter-in-loves, our 3 grands and 2 on the way, 3 dogs, grand dogs, job, shelter, healing of my husband's cancer. There is so much more that I know we all could name. God is such a loving God! He takes care of us always!! What if your blessing come through raindrops…
Thank you for sharing, Pamela! Husband's cured cancer!! AMEN!!
Our blessings are always there but we must first be willing to look for them. They may be small but nonetheless, there is always something to be thankful for in our lives. I believe my biggest blessings are my husband, my sons and my dogs. I am thankful for all of them but also for a home to live in, food to eat, books to read and my Bible to study. I am a blessed woman.
You are so right! And this time of year really helps us to look around and just be thankful for the simple things. I try to do that every day of the year! Not just the obvious, but the small things that may not seem important, but really are!