This blog is brought to you
by Katie Blumberg
For me, the excuses began in college. I wanted to meet the perfect man, and in order for that to happen, I had to become the perfect woman. In my mind the perfect man for me would be studying to become a pastor or a youth pastor, therefore I would need to become the perfect pastor’s wife. How does one attain this high and regal status? By becoming a Biblical Studies major of course! Now don’t get me wrong, I loved studying the Word and diving through Scripture, pursuing the Lord, and learning about how to do ministry well in my every day life. I do not regret what I studied in school because it has made me the woman I am today; however, my initial intentions were not the holiest! I thought that as I waited for my future man, I would have to give up on becoming anything but a future wife of someone.
Continuing on to graduate school… Studying something that may lead to a job, rather than just a marital status… Pursuing a long-term mission’s trip to another country… Traveling to the other side of the country for a summer to work in a ministry position… Taking a fellowship in another state where I could pursue my dreams of owning a coffee shop, and be connected with other Christians who are figuring out life post-college… Joining Youth With a Mission and traveling the world spreading the good news… Moving in with my aunt in Georgia and doing ministry in her church… The list goes on and on. These are all service opportunities, dreams, and passions that I gave up as I waited for my future husband. “I’ll do that when I get married,” or “What if doing that leads me away from the man that I am supposed to be with, and I miss my opportunity with him?” were always thoughts that held me back from accepting my singleness and running towards my dreams. So here I sit, snuggling my cat in a city I feel safe in, surrounded by people I feel safe with, at a job that is safe. I only fear now that I will get married, eventually, and wonder what could have been if I had pursued the desires of my heart when I was single.
Ladies, you have all been blessed with gifts, desires, and passions. Some you may be figuring out, others you have known your entire life. Use them! Don’t wait around for your husband to arrive thinking that you will be able to pursue those things then! He is not going to make you any more able to be you than you can be RIGHT now! Have you been blessed with a servants’ heart? Find out the needs of those in your neighborhood (ministry is not confined to a four-walled building we call the church!) and help them!
Has the Lord given you the gift of encouragement? Write a letter, and email, send a text, or meet a friend for coffee and tell them how much they have blessed you. Is opening your home to friends and family exciting to you? Break out your best dishes, cook up a delicious meal and invite over everyone you know! Please don’t stuff those gifts inside thinking you’ll pull them out on a rainy day or that your husband will help you to become the woman you were meant to be.
Use this time to build relationships with amazing, godly women who will encourage and lift you up, surround you with love, keep you accountable, and push you to use those gifts for the Lord.
“It is doubtful that there could ever be a better time to serve Jesus than this “moment” of singleness. Rather than wasting precious moments fantasizing about an earthly lover, take advantage of your free hours each day to serve the Lord of Heaven. If you are frustrated and distracted, rather than fruitfully serving Jesus, then ask Him right now to adjust your vision.” (pg 33).
Take this time to let the Lord teach you who you are, what you love, and how you will be used to advance his Kingdom. Your husband is not going to tell you those things, and guess what?! I bet that amazing man will be even more attracted to you if you have spent time figuring these things out, building a strong foundation in Christ, and serving the Lord and your neighbor even without him by your side! Take the risk you have been putting off for fear of losing your chance with ‘him.’ Figure out your love language, and start loving on everyone who comes across your path!
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Let’s Pray:
Abba, Pappa; thank you for your grace and mercy on us. Thank you for bestowing gifts upon us to bless you and others with. Please teach us to prayerfully and thoughtfully use these gifts in the way that you intended. Give us the courage to explore our interests; teach us who we are in YOU, so that we never lose our identity, even in marriage! Instill in us a servants heart, and a desire to seek out your plan for our lives. In the name of Jesus Christ we pray, Amen.
Your Assignment:
What have you given up for fear that you will miss out on finding the man of your dreams? Are you waiting to start something big because you think you need a husband to help you? If so, what step are you going to take to stop sitting around bored and day-dreaming about your fantasy man, and start acting on what the Lord has given you? Let’s get started ladies!
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Meet Katie Blumber – Blog Contributor Singles Ministry
Katie is a recent graduate from a small Christian liberal arts school, with a degree in Biblical Studies and Human Services. She has a huge ache for deep justice in her community and city, and longs to do God’s work in her every day life.
She is a barista at a local coffee shop, where she gets to serve amazing coffee and interact with people all day long. She volunteers at her church, loves going to shows and discovering new bands, and spends time with her amazing friends any chance that she gets.
For Katie, life is all about living out Christ’s love in the community that she lives in. She is also passionate about purity, healthy relationships, and teaching others to see themselves the way that Christ sees them.
