November 22, 2024

GCH:decaf – Circle of Friends

January 18, 2013 by

Circle-of-Friends

There is a semi-old song that I think about when I think of the girls I have met through this GCH:Decaf ministry.  I have been singing it a lot lately.  If you have never listened to the girl group you should really look them up.  They have some awesome harmonies and the words to their songs are really relevant.  Chances are you have heard their songs and just didn’t know who sings them.  Anyway, the song I have had on my heart is “Circle of Friends”.  Here is the first part:

We were made to love and be loved

But the price this world demands will cost you far too much

I spent so many years just trying to fit in

Now I’ve found a place in this circle of friends

In a circle of friends we have one Father

In a circle of friends we share this prayer

That every orphaned soul will know

And all will enter in

To the shelter of this circle of friends

That is how I feel about all of the new friends I have met through the study of “A Daughter’s Worth” by Ava Sturgeon.  We began the study as just a group of random hearts from all over the United States mostly, then, we had friends join us in other countries.  People began reading our study blogs in over 100 countries around the world.  The leaders and the girls in the groups became friends and we got to know each other through our Facebook groups.  This study, this group of leaders, this group of girls has changed my life and I want to say Thank You to each one.  I’m sure there will be more lives touched through the words spoken through the blogs than we will ever know.  I pray that God multiplies the hearts blessed by the words He inspired us to write and publish.  The next verse of the song:

If you weep, I will weep with you

If you sing for joy the rest of us will lift our voices too

But no matter what you feel inside there’s no need to pretend

That’s the way it is in this circle of friends

Many of you have shared your hearts and hurts with us during this study.  We have grown close and that makes this Mama’s heart so happy.  We have loved to cry with you and sing with you and celebrate with you.  We are your FRIENDS and you are ours.  As we began making plans for the next study we looked at many things that might make a difference in the lives of teen girls and young women.  We began talking about doing the study “not a fan” by Kyle Idleman.  As we continued to pray and make decisions, it was becoming apparent that we needed to take a step back for a time.  We have decided to not go forward with a new Bible study for teens with Girlfriends Coffee Hour Ministry right now.  There are many exciting things happening at GCH.  I believe God will continue to bless the women as they minister to other women all over the world in the areas they have chosen to pour their hearts into.

                Among the nations, tribes and tongues we have sisters and brothers

                And when we meet in heaven we will recognize each other

                 With joy so deep and love so sweet

                Oh we’ll celebrate these friends

                And a life that never ends

                In a Prayer

                That will not be long before

                All will enter in

                To the shelter of this circle of friends

Because we have all become social media friends, we can contact each other whenever we want to.  Please know that your leaders love you all very much and would love the chance to keep in touch and be a part of your life as you mature.  Remember us if you ever need someone to pray for you, we would love that.  If you have questions about anything, please message us and we will be there for you.

                In a CIRCLE of FRIENDS we have one FATHER,

                In a CIRCLE of FRIENDS we share this prayer,

                That every orphaned soul will know and ALL will enter in,

                To the shelter of this CIRCLE of FRIENDS.

May our Father God bless and keep each of you until we meet again.  If you want to reach me you can find me at Teresa@girlfriendscoffeehour.com or leave me a comment here.  I’d love to hear from you.

Mama T

 

Song Credit goes to Point of Grace – Circle of Friends

Words and music by Douglas McKelvey and Steve Siler

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GCH:decaf – Friends are IMPORTANT! and so is FAMILY

January 15, 2013 by

We have been having a most AWESOME time getting to know each other these last three months.  We began our Teen Ministry with the hopes that we would be able to reach young women all over the world with the love of God and for them to see how much they are worth to the Father.  In the process, we got to know many new hearts and smiles.

Yesterday Diane shared with us about her friend, Jesus.  How many of you truly think of Jesus as a friend?  Does He have a place in your heart like your best friend does?  When bad stuff happens to you, who do you run to?  Is Jesus first, or do you go to a friend, or a parent?  Sometimes Jesus is the LAST person we go to – and only because we couldn’t figure it out on our own.  That’s not cool.  That is not how Jesus wants us to think of Him.  How long would we have a best friend if we only talked to them when we were bored or in danger?  Not long, I think.  Friends need to be cared for even when things are fun and good.

It is a FACT that bad things will happen in our lives.  It is a FACT that we need other people to walk along side of us for support.  It is a FACT that Jesus wants to be that person that we go to FIRST…even before our friends or our parents.

Through this teen ministry of GCH:Decaf I have met some pretty amazing women, teens and friends.  We have been introducing you to some of the girls that responded to our interview questions.  Today, I would like to introduce you to a pair of sisters who I met while doing the first study and preparing for things to come.  It is truly amazing how God works miracles in our hearts and lives when bad things happen to us.  Some things girls go through are just too awful to survive, let alone use that terrible thing as a ministry opportunity.

These sisters reminded me of the scripture in Psalms 34:18, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”   Through our online study group I met Trinicia and Carlia.  They answered my interview questions very honestly, just like the other girls did.  I love these girls so very much that I want to get to know them in person.  I want to watch their ministry unfold as they walk out the path God has laid before them.  The events in older sister’s life affected the life of the younger sister.  That is the way we were designed to be.  We bear each other’s burdens and joys.  I love that they are sisters and support each other.  I love that they have a heart for God.  Here is their story:

CarliaI first want to introduce you to Carlia.  She is 13 years old and lives in Memphis, Tennessee.  She likes the group One Direction (much like many of our girls here at :decaf) and this girls LOVES LeCrae.  I have to say that I am loving me some LeCrae myself these days.  I got a new CD for Christmas.  J  Her favorite movie is “Home is Where the Heart Is” and her favorite TV show is House of Payne.  By these choices alone you can tell Carlia values “home”.

 Carlia loves to dress eccentrically and to do that she needs to SHOP with her friends. When asked about food, she responded that all things “Rafferty’s” was her fave.  I have eaten at a Rafferty’s and I would have to agree that they have good food.

 Now here is the answer to the question:  What is one thing that changed your life?

“The day my oldest sister told my Mom that my dad had been touching her in a bad way.  It was hard because that was my dad and he was a part of me, but so was my sister and she was a girl, so I could feel what she was saying and it was hard for me to deal with.  It still is sometimes.  It did bring us closer as a family and it has made all of us stronger and more protective of each other.  I love her!”

Carlia loves her big sister, Trinicia.  God truly came close to these brokenhearted sisters, daughters and friends.  He has begun to heal the wounds that have crushed their spirits and out of these precious hearts, a ministry has been born.

 Trinicia

Let me introduce you to 19 year old, Miss Trinicia.  She goes to college in Nashville, Tennessee.  Her favorite singer is Beyonce and her favorite Christian artist is also LeCrae.  Oh, yeah, and he is CUTE, too.  Trinicia said that Disney’s Pete’s Dragon is her all-time favorite movie and she likes to watch Criminal Minds and Cold Case on TV.  Don’t mess with her, she’s analytical.  LOL  Trinicia likes to be casually dressy.   She sounds pretty classy to me.  Her favorite thing to do with friends is go out to eat and her favorite is Chinese food.

 So here’s the kicker for me; when Trinicia was asked about one thing that changed her life she responded:  “Meeting my best friend Devin at a time when I had to disclose to my mom that my stepdad… had been molesting me and raped me.  God has used that horrible time in my life to help other girls and women get through such a horrific moment in their life.  God has really given me a ministry!  He has used something bad and is using it for His good!”

Trinicia could have said that the action was the thing that changed her life, but what really changed her was the friendship of Devin who stood by her when she needed support to talk to her mom.  Do bad things happen to good people?  Absolutely.  Is it fair?  I don’t think so, but life isn’t fair.  The thing that matters is how Trinicia responded to the bad thing that happened in her life.  She gave it over to God to use as He saw fit and now Trinicia has a ministry helping other girls and women recover from these crushing blows of life.

Did you notice that not only did the bad stuff affect Trinicia, it affected Carlia?  Did you notice that Carlia said that their family is “closer” now than before they found out about the “bad stuff”?  How can that be?  I can understand how these sisters were reluctant to join us in our study “A Daughter’s Worth”, but getting to know them I see that they know the Father loves them and they return that love.  They have turned their pain into ministry to others who are hurting.  I truly love these young ladies.

In Matthew 22:37 it says, “Jesus replied: ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’”  That verse sums up what we were trying to learn in our last Bible study.  We want to seek God with everything in us, make HIM a part of us that we cannot live without.  We would be lost without our HEART, our SOUL or our MIND.  Make it a point to get to know Jesus this year like Trinicia and Carlia have.  Make 2013 the year you become a true FOLLOWER of Jesus!

I love all my girls,

Mama T

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 If you are interested in sending a private message to Teresa in regards to this blog, please email her at: Teresa@girlfriendscoffeehour.com

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GCH:decaf – Meet My Friend VICKY

January 1, 2013 by

It’s Tuesday, January 1, 2013!!!  We made it!  Of course the Mayans were wrong…the BIBLE says in Matthew 24:36, “But about that day or hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father.”  Let’s live 2013 like it is a GIFT from God…because it is!  The month of January we will be meeting a different GCH:decaf girl every day.  Each blogger will be introducing you to a new friend.

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Today, I want to introduce you to my friend VICKY.  She is a rockin’ awesome girl that I have met personally (swoon).  We did an interview session and I want to share what I have learned about Vicky.

Vicky  is 14 years old and lives in Murfreesboro, TN.  When asked “Who is your favorite musician or group”, Vicky answered, “One Direction”.  Hmmm, I’m really gonna have to look these English boys up.

Vicky’s favorite Christian artist is Francesca Battistelli.  She writes and sings her own music and is a totally cool young woman.  Frannie actually lives the life she sings about.  Check her out.  Thanks Vicky!

I asked Vicky what her favorite movie of all time was and she said, “Spiderman”.  That surprised me a little.  I’m going to have to investigate that topic a little further with her.  Is it because she has 4 brothers and they made her watch it so many times?  Is it because of the boyish good looks of Peter Parker?  Does she like to swing by spider silk???

Vicky and her mom, Megan, like to watch Grimm together.  I introduced them to Once Upon a Time and now they like to watch both fairy tale related TV shows.  Those Grimm guys are a little dark for me, but Vicky LOVES them.  Have you seen it?

When we talked about clothes and style, Vicky said she is a fan of all things PANTS.  I’m with her.  She looks mighty cute in her pants and she accessorizes them nicely.  Way to Go!

If you were one of Vicky’s friends you would hang out and watch movies together.  She loves to curl up and watch movies.  I’ll bring the popcorn.  You guys should totally show up and crash her couch.

I bet while she is watching movies she has a plate full of her favorite cookies.  Vicky has been taking a course in home economics and has been learning to cook.  We have seen some pictures of her delicious creations on the fellowship page.  I bet those are some good cookies!  Let me know when the next batch is coming out of the oven.

I asked Vicky one final bonus question.  “What is one thing that changed your life?”

Vicky has shared with us before in our last study that “Having her mom, Megan, come into her life” was a life changing moment.  Does that seem odd to you guys?  Life deals us some pretty rough things to handle sometimes.  But when it does, GOD is there to give us a hand out of the rough stuff.  Vicky’s mom, Megan, was adopted into their family.  Maybe you guys have similar situations.  I am thankful for Vicky and for Megan and their willingness to share their life story.  It’s pretty cool.  You really should get to know my friend Vicky.

Each day a blogger/leader will introduce you to another fellow decaf friend.  Check back every day and get to know the hearts in your study group.  We love each of you very much and pray for you daily.  If you ever want to talk to us, just leave us a message.  We would love to get to know you better.

Thanks Vicky for being such an GREAT interview subject and for doing such a great job on our study “A Daughter’s Worth” by Ava Sturgeon.  You are a true blessing.

Love you,

Mama T

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If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf  Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Please email GCH_Decaf@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information.

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GET READY!!!!! 2013 is Almost Here

December 27, 2012 by

Welcome Back, EVERYONE!!!  2013 is almost here and we are READY to get started in a BIG way.  We just completed our very first online Bible study of “A Daughter’s Worth” by Ava Sturgeon.  We had approximately 30 girls and lots of women participating in our ministry in 2012.  As our study came to a close, we were looking forward to Christmas and then the New Year.  We had time off from school for winter break in the United States and summer break in South Africa.  Is that not a wild concept???  Christmas is still Christmas, but it’s winter on one side of the world and summer on the other!  We have gone from a brand new online ministry to a ministry that is being read and has participants in over 100 countries across the globe.  God is SOOOOO good!

Do you think that when Jesus told the disciples to “Go and Tell the World” he would know that we would have the internet and Facebook and friends all over the world that are as close as our keyboards and phones?  The original disciples and followers of Jesus walked from city to city.  They floated a boat from coast to coast.  It wasn’t as easy to tell the world about Jesus as it is today, BUT THEY DID IT!!!  You know how I know they did it?  Because if they hadn’t, you and I would not know the name JESUS.  We would not be here, in this place, in this time if the followers of Jesus had not GONE and TOLD about the Savior of the World.

Over the next few weeks, the month of January, we are going to get to know each other.  We are going to see just how much we have in common, no matter where we live.  The central, most important thing we have in common is JESUS.  I want to “hear” you guys talking and getting to know one another.  I have had the chance to “meet” some wonderful friends here at Girlfriends Coffee Hour and my teen friends here at GCH:decaf are THE BEST!  I have even gotten to meet some of the girls and ladies face-to-face.  That has been so much fun.  Megan, Tina and I are going to start meeting with girls in our area to help the friendships grow.  I want you guys to form your own groups and send us pictures, videos and stories of how you are sharing GCH:decaf and Jesus with your friends and your community.  Jesus said, “Go and Tell the Good News”.  Let’s DO IT!!!

We are going to be studying the teen book “not a fan” by Kyle Idleman and working through the teen edition Follower’s Journal.  You will need both books to keep up and get the most out of our study.  We are going to look at our relationship with Jesus and see what our relationship status is.  The book starts out telling us that believers fall into TWO (2) categories:

1.  The “I Like Jesus on Facebook” group, and

2.  The “Why does Facebook even ask about religion?” group.

I liked this book from the start.  No nonsense, no church-y words, just real life.  We are going to learn a new term:  D.T.R.  (Define The Relationship).  Every girl knows that when you have a crush you want to know if that special someone likes you too.  It doesn’t take very long before you want to define the relationship (know where you stand).  We are going to do that with our relationship with Jesus, too.  He already knows how HE feels about us.  He loved us so much that he came to earth as a baby (Christmas) and died (Easter) for our sins so that we can live with Him forever.  While He was here, he taught average, normal, lost people about himself and His Father in Heaven.  Then He told them to spread the word.  The story of Jesus started with 12 disciples who followed Him and has grown to believers that cover the globe.

As we finished the study of “A Daughter’s Worth” by Ava Sturgeon, we hope that you have a better understanding of who you are to God and why Jesus came to save you.  Some of you shared how your lives were being changed and we are very thankful for that feedback and for the difference Jesus makes in your life.  The leaders were definitely changed and grew closer to the Lord and each other through this study.  We ask you to go a little deeper and define your relationship with Jesus.  Find out just how deep your crush on Him goes.

In addition, we are going to have TWO (2) age groups in GCH: decaf.  The older group will have ladies from 18-24 years old and we call them VENTI.  The younger group is for young ladies 12-18 years old and is called GRANDE.  We want you all to feel comfortable talking about relevant life issues in an age appropriate way.  The fellowship group is open to all ages, so we will get to “see” all our friends and chat and giggle with each other.  Tell all your friends.  There will be a contest coming in January and the student with the most referrals gets cool prizes.  The leaders are already recruiting and want to compete too (SMH, smh).

I cannot tell you all just how excited we are to be offering “not a fan” beginning Monday, February 4th, 2013!!!!!  My relationship with JESUS is the most important one in my life.  I hope you D.T.R. and see that it is the most important in yours as well.  Get your books.  Begin READING the RED book and we will begin the Follower’s Journal on February 4th.  Same great bloggers, same great schedule.

Let the NEW YEAR begin………………………………………….

Much LOVE to you ALL,

Mama T

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If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf  Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Please email GCH_Decaf@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information.

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A Daughter’s Worth: Week 12 / Day 2 – Recognize the Holiness of God

December 18, 2012 by

 

It is very fitting that the final week of our study is coming to a close just before Christmas.  It could not be more perfect to recognize that God wants to “come alive” in our hearts and lives than at Christmas when we celebrate Jesus coming to live with us.  We began this study learning who we are to God and just how much HE loves us.  We continued the study to learn how we are to respond to HIM as Father.  It has truly been an awesome journey to realize what A DAUGHTER IS WORTH to God.  He gave His only Son for you.  Your life matters to HIM.  How will you show Him how much HE matters to you????  Words are cool and everything, but ACTIONS speak louder!!

How are you going to bring HIS love to LIFE inside of you?  God calls us to be different from the world.  He wants us to be holy, like he is holy.  Today’s lesson focuses on church and how we are to recognize God’s holiness.  I would like to challenge you to think outside the box (the church box) and apply God’s call to YOUR LIFE – how you live every day.  When people think of you, do they think “holy”?  Hmmmm

The only time many of us use the word ‘holy’ is when we need an adjective to make something seem important.  Like cows and moly and poo.  Well, “HOLY” is important. It means to show a devotion to God and to a life of virtue; to set apart or worthy of respect by association with God.  Holy means being completely WHOLE just like GOD.

“But now you must be holy in everything you do, just as God — who chose you to be his children — is holy.  For he himself has said, “You must be holy because I am holy.”

1 Peter 1:15-16

Peter says we have been chosen to be God’s children – HIS Daughters – and we are to be holy, LIKE HE is HOLY.  God is calling out this generation to bring HOLY back.  Don’t be afraid, BE BOLD.  Can there be any safer place to be than a chosen daughter of the King of KINGS?  When God makes a promise, HE DOESN’T BREAK IT!!  All those promises in the Bible; they are still good.  God is still providing for every promise He ever made.  All those promises in the Bible – they are YOURS.  Claim them, they are free.  Let those promises bring holy to life inside of your heart.

“For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart.”

Hebrews 4:12 ESV

God knows what is in your heart.  Do not be deceived to think that you can say one thing and act another and God will not know.  Give God permission to change your heart to be like HIS and He WILL.  It’s a promise.  You won’t regret living your life for Jesus, but you will regret it if you don’t.  This season of Christmas when we celebrate Jesus being born as a baby and coming to life a life as a human, embrace the story of His holiness.  Take it inside you and let it change your heart.  Let your heart break for the things that break HIS heart.

Let Love Come to LIFE Inside of YOU this Christmas!  As Ava tells us, “As a worthy daughter, being holy is both challenging and rewarding.  You may not be perfect every time, but working toward purity is all that God asks.  Don’t be frightened by a lifestyle of holiness; after all, the Holy Spirit is in you, making all things possible.  Praise God for His presence, and most of all, acknowledge His awesome holiness.” (p. 171)

Let’s Praise God together:

Father, we praise You for WHO You are.  We thank You for Your promises to care for us and lead us and guide us every day.  Father, we give You permission to bring our hearts to life inside us and make us burn to be Your hands and feet.  Make us holy like You are holy.  Make us whole and complete in Your love.  We love You, Lord.  Thank You for loving us so much that You sent Your Son to this earth as a baby to be a sacrifice for our sins.  May our generation be one that lives to love others the way You would have us to.  Continue to teach us your ways.   AMEN

My love to you all and Merry Christmas,

Mama T <3

If you have come to a place that your heart is telling you to ask Jesus into your life as Lord and Savior, please ASK HIM.  It’s easy, it’s free and it’s the best gift you could give Him for Christmas.  We invite you today to ask Him into your heart.

Please pray with us:

Lord Jesus, I come to You today and ask You to be my Lord and Savior. I have learned who You are through this bible study Lord, and I want to know You personally.  I admit that I am a sinner, I confess the sins that I have in my heart, and I believe You will forgive me for all my sins. I ask You now to come into my life, as my personal Lord and Savior. AMEN!

If you prayed that prayer today, let us know.  We would love to rejoice with you as you celebrate you BIRTHday as a sister in Christ.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf  
Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Please email GCH_Decaf@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information.

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A Daughter’s Worth: Week 10 / Day 2 – Keep Your Life Clean

December 4, 2012 by

 

I talked to my girls about some of the names girls get called when they try to live out their life for God.  I added a few ‘old school’ words I heard when I was in school, too.  Things haven’t changed so much.  See if these look familiar:

Teacher’s Pet                                       Party Pooper                                        Weak

Goodie 2 Shoes                                   Kill Joy                                                  Stuck Up

Know It All                                           Buzz Kill                                                Goody Goody

Nerd                                                      Lame                                                  Add Yours Here

When people think about you, what kind of words come to mind?  I look over this list of words meant to hurt and cause peer pressure.  They say these words to make themselves feel okay about the way they are choosing to live their lives, not so much about the way a “good girl” lives hers.  So look back over that list again.  Is there really anything bad on that list?  Is there anything there that would cause God to be ashamed of your behavior?  Can you bring glory to God as you live your life…even if people call you names like that?   I know you have heard the words that “Bad Girls” get called.  Think about that list.  Is God glorified if you are living a “bad girl” kind of lifestyle?

At this point in our study, we have learned what God expects of us as a Daughter of the King.  We know how to bring our earthly parents joy and we know how to make our Heavenly Father happy.  It’s time to live out our faith in God.  There may still be some bad habits we have, or some areas in our lives we need to turn away from.  Look how easy it is to change:

Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.  Psalms 51:10

When your heart is clean, your thoughts will change, your actions will change, people will notice.  In today’s lesson of A Daughter’s Worth, Ava Sturgeon says, “After accepting Christ, you begin to desire the clean heart that He provides. “  Then Ava encourages us:  “Sharing Christ is so much easier when you become a living testimony.” 

For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks.  Luke 6:45b

Live YOUR Faith.  It’s impossible to give away something you don’t have.  Make sure the people in your life can see the change Jesus has made.  You won’t be perfect, but you will be forgiven and can begin each day fresh and new.  Show love, kindness, compassion and generosity.  There will be a different list of words people will say about you.  Words that truly do bring glory to God, the Father and words that you WILL NOT be embarrassed by.

Before we go, I want to remind you of ways to Keep Your Life Clean:

•Put God first. This means making the commitment to seek God.

•Finding ways to be a blessing. “Being a Blessing” means taking the focus off yourself and placing it onto someone else.

•Acting right on purpose. This means treating people with kindness, respect, and patience, even those that are hard to love.  Right behavior is Christianity in action.

Let’s Pray:

Heavenly Father,  We want to bring glory to You.  We want others to see Your life shining through us.  Create in us a clean heart.  Give us the desire to remove those bad habits from our lives and live for You.  Help us to treat others with kindness, respect and patience.  Help us as we walk out our faith, especially on the hard days.  We love You Lord.  AMEN

Be A Blessing,

Mama T <3

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For the A Daughter’s Worth Online Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button located at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH: decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Please email GCH_Decaf@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information.

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A Daughter’s Worth: Week 9 / Day 2 – Extracurricular Activities are Stressful

November 27, 2012 by

 

Extracurricular Activities are Stressful

When I was younger, much younger, I had BIG dreams.  I felt that God had BIG PLANS for my life…but I was stuck.  At least I felt stuck.  I began seeking God and His plans for me when I was about 12 years old and continued to watch for Him through my teens.  It wasn’t always easy to stay on the straight path and sometimes I strayed.  Having too many extracurricular activities was not a problem where I grew up.  There was nothing, and I mean NOTHING, to do.  Boredom can steal your focus from God just as much as being too busy can.  As I began parenting my girls, I wanted them to experience all that God’s world had to offer.  I wanted them to be able to try things and see where their passions would lie.  I wanted them to grow up with few regrets of things that might have been.

We tried various sports, dance, clubs, groups, camps and mission trips.  We went on field trips, read books and traveled.  Hopefully the girls were able to experience things in their lives that would point them to their God-given passions and abilities.  I encouraged the girls to try everything at least once and the things they liked…DO IT AGAIN.

When middle school came I asked the girls to do everything they had any interest in, but by high school they had to pick one interest.  My daughter Michele tried basketball, clubs, band and peer tutoring.  Lindsay didn’t really have any interests in and around school, she wanted to dance ballet.  Robin is sports-gifted so she tried tennis, basketball, cross-country, soccer, a little bit of golf and band.  By the time high school came around, Michele had dropped band and sports, but kept her grades high and found that she loved to help kids learn.  Lindsay still didn’t like the organization of school much, but loved her ballet classes.  Now she is enjoying being able to choose her college classes on her schedule much better than high school.  Robin chose to play soccer, keep her grades high and volunteer her time at church.

These are only three daughters from the same family with the same values seeking to find their place in God’s family.  It gets crazy at our house trying to balance everyone’s schedule, but the most important thing is to keep God FIRST and all the other STUFF falls into place.  Our family MOTTO is “You have time for what you make time for”.  If God says, “Where’s MY time?” the answer better not be “I didn’t have time”.  He gave up something pretty important for you, so you should be willing to give up a little something for HIM.

There is a famous quote from George Bernard Shaw: “Youth is Wasted On the Young”.  I think it is famous because all of us old people wish we had YOUR energy and potential with OUR wisdom and we would have made better choices when we had the chance.  In the Bible…in Ecclesiates, King Solomon says that it is good to be young and enjoy life.  Solomon lived life to the fullest.  He tried everything under the sun and you know what he found out???  It’s all meaningless unless GOD is there.

Take every opportunity to try new things and meet new people.  Put God first and let him light the way to those new things.  You will NEVER regret one minute following God.  You WILL regret leaving him out.  I promise.  Don’t waste your youth being stupid.  Your life is a GIFT, give it back to God and see what He wants to make of it.

What you ARE is God’s gift to you.  What you make of it is your gift to God.

Let’s PRAY:

Dear Father, Thank you for the gift of this life and the opportunities in it.  Thank you for giving us individual passions and desires that aren’t like anyone else’s.  Help us to find our place in your BIG family.  Help us find balance when life seems overwhelming, stressful and gets us down.  We know you love us and forgive us when we fail.  Help us to forgive ourselves and move even closer to you.  We love you.  Be patient with us as we learn to show you how much we love you with our actions.    AMEN

Be Blessed,

Mama T  <3

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For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information

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A Daughter’s Worth: Week 8 / Day 2 – You CAN Insist That Boys Treat You Well

November 20, 2012 by

When you CAN do something it means you are Able, Permitted, Possible, or Designed to do something.  That is pretty awesome to think that I was designed to be able to insist that people treat me well.  Does that mean that every person in my life WILL treat me well?  Uh, NO!  Do I have to accept that behavior from them?  Uh, No.  So, why would I let a boy treat me any less than God created me to be?  Uh, WOW.  Do you know what the past tense of CAN is??? COULD.   Could hurts me to say.  Could means that I made a bad choice and, if I could go back, I would change what happened.  Could usually comes with regret. 🙁

In our home, if we have a hard time deciding if something is right or wrong, we take it back to the Bible and see what it says about the subject.  When we have friends or family members who treat us poorly, we look to see if our behaviors have lined up with the scriptures.  The verses we go to about relationships is 1 Corinthians 13.  It’s called the LOVE chapter.  We all want to be loved and want to love other people, so why not seek out what LOVE is from the source, GOD.

 So the Bible says this is what love IS.  Anything that doesn’t look like this is NOT love and you can WALK the other way or INSIST to be treated with love.  Sometimes that is hard to do.  We may have to walk away from our friends or that cute guy that we want to like.  We may have to stand up for ourselves and tell our ‘friends’ (and sometimes our family) that we don’t want to be treated in a way that makes us feel uncomfortable.  When we deal with our friends and family, we also need to follow these verses and treat them with LOVE.

If a young man wants your attention and wants to love you, he will make you feel smart, funny and pretty. (And not because of what he can get from you)  He will never ask you to do anything that will make you ashamed or feel dirty. (Love does not insist on its own way, it does not rejoice in wrongdoing)  He will want you to spend time with your friends and family and would even want to hang out with you.  (Love is patient and kind, it does not envy, it is not arrogant or rude)  Boyfriends should draw you closer to God, not pull you away from Him.  (Love rejoices with the truth, bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things)  Boyfriends should always make you feel good inside; not sick, worthless, jealous or angry.  (Love endures all things)

When you are a teenager it is hard to find a boy that can measure up to all these standards.  Sometimes you want to lower your standards just to have someone you can call “yours”.  Each time you give your heart away, you lose a little piece of yourself.  Most teens are not able to love someone else more than they love themselves. That takes maturity and maturity comes with living life and seeking God.   It is almost impossible to find a teen boy who loves you the way God created you to be loved. It’s OK to wait for that person God has been preparing just for you.

In my family, with so many daughters, we have many different opinions on the topic of dating and boys.  Some of my daughters want to wait to have a boyfriend, to hold hands, to kiss someone; to give him her heart until she is ready to be married.  Some of my daughters enjoy having a young man to call her own and share her “life” with.  A couple have gotten tired of waiting, tried to make it happen on their own and have had broken hearts.  I love them all and continue to point them back to 1 Corinthians 13 to help them decide if they are being treated with love and if they are treating others with love.  There is no cookie cutter answer about having a boyfriend because girls are not cookies.  =D

In our study, Ava Sturgeon says, “As a daughter of worth, you should expect to be treated well.  Dating the wrong guy is a tragic waste of you.  God’s beautiful potential.”  How true!  Protect your heart.  You are going to need all those pieces of yourself.  If you find that your heart is already broken into little pieces, take them to God and let Him put them back together.  He will.  It’s not too late.  He wrote the book on LOVE, so trust Him to show you what perfect LOVE looks like.

If what you are seeing and receiving from people does not match up with what the Bible says you deserve – turn around and head back toward God.  You are on the wrong path.  That leads me back to my life verse, Proverbs 3:6, “In all your ways acknowledge Him and HE will direct your paths”. 

You CAN insist that boys/men/parents/siblings/friends treat you well.  You CAN treat them well in return.  It’s not too late to get on the right PATH facing God’s direction.  Be blessed my friends.

Let’s Pray:

Father we thank you for creating us with the desire to be loved and to want to love others.  Lord we want someone to love us the way YOU love us.  Father, give us patience to wait on the person you are preparing for us.  Give us people in our lives who support us, care about us and protect our hearts.  We know that you are the source of all love and good things and that is what we want for ourselves and for our friends.  Help us to always look to you for guidance and keep our feet on the right path.  We love you, Lord.  Amen

Mama T <3

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For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information

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A Daughter’s Worth: Week 7 / Day 2 – Children Must Obey

November 13, 2012 by

I have to admit something.  I was born with a rebellious spirit.  Really, I was…and…it didn’t go away just because I got older.  I am the firstborn.  I have two younger brothers…and I wanted a sister or nothing at all.  They could have those boys back!!!  I never let my parents, or my brothers forget that I wanted a sister.  It didn’t matter.  It didn’t matter how much I whined or complained or made everyone miserable, I still had brothers.  (sigh)  Mom said, “Go help your brother” and you KNOW what was going on in my mind.  (No need to put those words here)  You know what they were.  If they broke something, I got in trouble.  If they cried, I got yelled at.  Can you believe I still remember that stuff?  It really doesn’t matter anymore.  We are all grown-ups with families of our own.  But still, Mom said help and I helped.

I had times that I didn’t want to do the chore list that my mom and dad left for me to do, especially in the summer.  Why didn’t I get to be lazy in the summer?  I just got out of school and now I have a massive chore list.  I got old enough to get my permit and then driver’s license.  I couldn’t wait to get a car and a job and, and FREEDOM.  Somehow things never worked out the way I planned.  I was 18 before I got that job and I shared my mom’s car.  I was 21 before I had a car of my own with all the bills that go with it.  Hmmm.  Why wasn’t my life working out like I thought it should?  Why were my parents putting all these restrictions on my FREEDOM?

Hebrews 12:11 says, “For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.”

I looked up the definition of DISCIPLINE and it says this:  discipline n. Training expected to produce a specific character or pattern of behavior, especially training that produces moral or mental improvement.

So, my parents wanted me to grow up with a specific character that reflected good moral and mental behaviors????  Who’d a thunk it???  When I began thinking about raising my own daughters, I wanted to go even one step further and make sure they knew from Day 1 what and why I wanted them to do the things I asked them to do.  I wanted to be the kind of mom they could look up to.  A mom they could talk to and ask questions of.  I wanted to always point them back to God and the Scriptures.

My favorite guide for raising my daughters is found in Deuteronomy 6:7-9.  It says, “Repeat them (laws, traditions, scriptures) again and again to your children.  Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up.  8 Tie them to your hands and wear them on your forehead as reminders. 9 Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.”  There is no question that my girls (or their friends) can’t ask me.  I will answer every question as honestly and biblically as I possibly can.

So I tried to do everything RIGHT with my girls.  I tried to answer all their questions; even the hard ones.  I took them to church, taught them to serve and then one day my oldest daughter went off to college.  We sent her off to discover life for herself, with godly discipline and character behind her.  And then…we were disappointed.  There is a reason Solomon tells us in Proverbs 22:6 to “Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it.”  Even though I had taught my daughter the best way I knew how, she had to learn life lessons on her own.  I had to love her enough to let her learn the hard way.  I asked her if she would like to share some things she learned during that time in her life.  Her name is Michele and she will be 23 in December.  Here is what she had to share with you guys:

I think I was a little different than most teenagers.  Starting at 13, I understood my parents reasoning behind the rules, and that probably saved my life.  Most teens go through a phase where they feel like their parents don’t know anything about the teenager’s life and what they’re going through, so they must not know what they’re talking about.  As a result, they’ll stray a bit and rebel against their parents rules, maybe go to church less often or not at all.  My time of rebellion was once I graduated high school and moved away to college.  Because I was insistent on doing my own thing and thinking I knew best, God was not at the top of my priority list.  I hardly ever thought about Him or asked his opinion.  When my parents asked if I was going to church on the weekends, my excuse was “I don’t have time.”  Of course I didn’t have time, because I didn’t make time.  You make time for things that are important to you.

Ok, so about obeying your parents…you obey because God has commanded you to.  In fact, the first commandment in the bible with a promise attached to it is Exodus 20:12.  “Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.”  Sounds to me like that’s kind of important.

If your parents are Christians, you obey them knowing they are striving to teach you what is right and want the best for you.  No parent is perfect, just like no teenager is perfect.  The way to deal with that is to LOVE.  This is my biggest thing lately.  Love your parents enough to see their intentions and forgive them when they make the wrong choice in how to deal with something.

If your parents are not Christians, there is always a chance that the way they are leading is not in line with God’s law.  What do you do then?  Just blow them off and have a bad attitude, treating them like they’re stupid?  NO!  According to Romans 13:1, everyone must submit to authority.  In Matthew 22:37-40, Jesus says your first priority/responsibility is to love God with everything in you.  So, God’s commands are MOST important.  And the second is to love others as yourself (or as God loves you).  The key to obeying the rules, laws, and commandments is to Love God and Love People.

If your parents are asking you to do something you believe is wrong, you still must respect and honor them, but you CAN tell them how you feel.  If you are following God and respectfully informing your parents that you do not agree and don’t feel comfortable doing what they have asked.  If you are in line with the Bible, then you have fulfilled your responsibilities.  But you must ALWAYS respect authority.

<3 Michele Bolme<3

ALL I CAN SAY IS WOW!!!  So when Solomon said that if I taught my daughter right, gave her discipline and showed her how to live like Jesus, then one day when she walked away to do her own thing, she WOULD return to God because she LOVES HIM.  I am one thankful Mom.  Now only 7 more daughters to go. (sigh, sigh and sigh some more)

Much love to you all……………………  Mama T

Pray with Me:

Heavenly Father, we know you love us and that you discipline us because you love us.  We thank you for loving us enough to give us parents who want us to grow up with a good character and a love for YOU and for other people.  Please forgive us when we get distracted and don’t put you first.  Keep loving us until we come back to you.  Father, I pray for each heart reading this blog today.  Make their hearts soft and ready to serve you.  We love you Abba, Father.  Amen

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For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information

Filed Under: Teens Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

A Daughter’s Worth Week 6 / Day 2: A Good Friend Shares Her Faith

November 6, 2012 by

I would not say that I have very many friends.  I know a lot of people.  I help a lot of people.  But if I really had trouble or needed someone to talk to, I would have a very short list of people I would call or show up on their door step.  It has always been easier for me to deal with my own struggles by myself and sometimes share them with God.  That’s not how God wants me to be, that’s how I have done it…on my own.  Is anyone else guilty of this, like me?????  I’m working on this area of my life.  I have opened up more to friendship than I ever have before.  This is still hard for me, but I know God put me here to be a friend so that people can see Him in ME.  That’s weird for me to think.

I don’t have a problem talking to people in elevators, or holding a door for an elderly person, or talking to a child.  My kids find me embarrassing because I “talk to strangers”.  I’ve been guilty of carrying someone’s groceries for them, paying someone’s bill (when they didn’t expect it) and even taking time to listen to their “life story” when I had other things I needed to do.  I’ve taken people with me when I have gone out to run errands, just because they needed to get out of the house.  I’ve taken groceries and left them on doorsteps, mystery cakes have shown up at friend’s houses, bought tanks of gas when a young mom couldn’t get to work that week and taken a meal to someone just because.  I like to look for ways to share blessings with people.  I ask God to show me who needs a blessing and He always does.  It’s a lot of fun to look for random acts of kindness to do for someone.

I can’t say that I knew these people very well.  Some I did, some I had never met before.  So, if I am to live my life like Jesus, were these people my friends?  I think so.  Each time I loved on someone I got the opportunity to share Jesus with them.  Most of the time the response would be, “but you don’t have to”, or “but you don’t even know me”, or “How did you KNOW?”  My response was always a smile and the response that they were loved.  They would ask for the source of that love and I would get a chance to share what God had done for me.  I hope they told other people how God blessed them that day.   Hopefully they would do something for someone else and pay it forward.

Jesus “paid it forward” for us.  There is nothing that we can say or do that will be greater or harder for us to do than He already did.  Jesus said, “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.  You are my friends if you do what I command.”  (John 15:13-14)  Jesus laid down His life for us.  He was there for us even before we knew we needed him.  When we are sad and need a friend, He is there.  When we had a bad day and just want to scream and cry, He is there.  When we need a hug and some comfort, He is there.  Because we know JESUS, He is there for us.

What about those people who don’t know him yet?  How will they find out?  Who will teach them what it looks like to be a friend of Jesus?  Maybe it’s time to lay down your life and look for someone to help.  It’s not about dying, it’s about living.  It is very good to have Christian friends and Christian influences.  It is very good to hang out with people who can make your spiritual life stronger.  It is also VERY good to look for opportunities to share your faith with someone who doesn’t know Jesus yet.  Non-Christians are already watching the way you live.  Why not teach them to follow Jesus too?  Then they won’t be a “non-Christian” anymore.  J

SHARE YOUR FAITH.  IT’S CONTAGIOUS AND THE WORLD NEEDS SOME OF IT!!!

I found a couple of songs for you guys today.  Give them a listen and tell me what you think.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kyeyhOdgyYM&feature=fvwrel  Love Her Like Jesus by Casting Crowns

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Js_hgkHQ6Bc  Crazy Love by Hawk Nelson

If we have truly been changed, we have to give it away.  How can you do that this week?

Let’s Pray:

Dear Heavenly Father, We thank you for being our friend.  For always being there for us even when we forget to turn to you.  Thank you for the friends you give us to sharpen our faith.   Thank you for the opportunities we have to share our faith with others.   We know we need to be in fellowship with Christian friends, but show us who you need us to be friendly to, to share your love with.  We are willing to be your hands and feet.  We don’t want to be snobby, or shy.  We don’t want to take on bad habits to fit in.  We want the world to see YOU in our lives and want the love that we have.  Thank you for paying the price for our freedom from sin even before we knew we needed you.  We love you Lord.    Amen

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For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information

Filed Under: Teens Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
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