November 25, 2024

GCH: POTs….. Parents of Teens (an introduction)

October 19, 2012 by

This blog is specifically for parents of teens…

but will be a great resource for any parent.

I am Megan Smidt and I am  a co-founder of this ministry, Girlfriends Coffee Hour, and I also lead our ministry for teen girls called GCH:decaf.

I am an unlikely parent. I have not given birth to any children, but I have 5 that legally and lovingly call me “mom.” I always thought God wanted to use me for His purposes in working with kids, but he has shown me very clearly over the past few years that He needs me with their leaders and parents, specifically, to further His Kingdom.

My Kids

So, I have 5 kids ages 14-21 and I volunteer every week with the high school students at my local church. I have been a parent of teenagers for 8 years already and I have another 6 years to go, God willing. I love them… and I love the amazing journey that each teenaged relationship I have brings my way. I am honored to be able to walk along side  you in this season and I pray that we learn a lot from each other.

As you can imagine, I also know the added stresses of raising teens in a blended family situation. I get that… even though I am the only one who blended into our family. My teens are living through and surviving abandonment, neglect, anger, disappointment, failure, psychological sickness and abuse, and other pain that comes from being a child of divorce and being raised primarily by someone other than their biological parent.

I am a Certified Christian Life Coach who specializes in relationships…. And I really love people…. especially encouraging people in their walk with the Lord.

God has shown me it is important that, as a ministry, we not just be there for teen girls, but that we help bring healing to families through also offering support to their parents. My prayer is that GCH will be an instrument to help families become more fully devoted followers for God and, in turn, thrive in this season. I thank you for being on this journey with me.

I do not believe that kids need to wait until they are older to do something big for God…. They can do it NOW. Understanding their own unique and divine mission is a key step in them accomplishing big things for God. Being a parent myself, I know how important it is as a parent to be there for your children to give them much-needed motivation and encouragement to help a teen take a step towards God, especially being in a fallen world that is trying to get your teen to step away from Him every day.

I will be starting out this blog by writing a few times a week here about how you can help your teen discover God’s mission for their unique life purpose. I pray this blog will change your relationship with your teenager and help you prepare them for a meaningful life that God has so divinely created them for. I plan on helping you have conversations with your teens about such things as….

  • Knowing strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, and threats
  • Praying for courage, perseverance, and miracles
  • Understanding spiritual gifts, best qualities and finest values
  • Rethinking motives, relationships and use of time
  • Writing a Lifetime Dream Statement
  • Surrendering all to Jesus

 We are partners… in this together. We all know it takes a village to raise a child and I pray that you will find this to be a helpful place as you navigate these waters of teenagedom.

Lord, we come to you today praying for your leading. Help me come up with good questions to ask my kids and help me every day to truly hear my kids’ hearts. I am thankful that You have helped me find my life’s purpose in You as an adult and I pray you will use me as a willing vessel to speak into the lives of every family represented here. We thank you in advance for how relationships will be restored through this journey and for all of the incredible discoveries we will make together. Lord, we thank you for this provision! Amen.

Blessings to you and yours,

Megan 🙂

megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com

https://www.facebook.com/megan.smidt

Sign up for one of our Online Bible Study or Fellowship Groups for Women and Teen Girls here:

http://girlfriendscoffeehour.com/sign-up-for-girlfriends-coffee-hour-online-bible-studies/

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A Daughter’s Worth: Week 3/ Day 5: See Your Eternal Value

October 19, 2012 by

 

Girls, just like all of you, I want to look and feel good about myself. Like some of you I can spend hours upon hours in the mall. What can I say, I like clothes, shoes, bags, make-up, jewelry; did I leave anything out?

Over the past ten years I was able to travel to different countries and have seen some really amazing things and sites. But when I look back at the places I have been to and the stuff I have accumulated over the years, I have to ask myself if this is what life is all about?

 

Although I treasure the memories of standing under the Eiffel Tower in Paris, taking a water taxi in Venice and looking at awe at the Alps in Switzerland, I have to ask myself if this is what I value in life. Does this satisfy my deepest heart’s desire, is this something that will change my life for the better and more importantly, will I be able to impact someone else’s life?

Girls, I don’t know about you, but my deepest desire is to do something of eternal value. Something that will last forever and that I along with other people will hold dear. How can I do this you might ask, the answer is simple, it is in the little things we do for other people, it is in the attitude of our hearts. You know, when you do something good for someone, you automatically feel good about yourself, not that that should be your motivation.

Colossians 4:5 says: “…… make the most of every opportunity”. That can simply be paying someone a compliment, opening the door for someone, returning your grocery cart, giving someone a smile or helping out at a shelter. If we do these things, we are helping others find Jesus, and helping them find Jesus is the best gift we can give anyone.

Not all of us have the means or finances to support people in need, but all of us have the ability to go on our knees to pray for someone, to be kind, to do good, be faithful, gentle, have self-control, give love, spread joy, be patient and kind.

Girls, I don’t want to leave a bunch of photos and a closet full of clothes behind, but what I want to leave behind is a godly legacy.

 

Let us strive to see our eternal value. This is our lives; these are the moments that make up our lives. Let’s use them wisely.

Be blessed my dear girlfriends!

Let us pray:

Father, I thank you for each and every girl in GCH: decaf. Thank you Father, that each one of them are fearfully and wonderfully made. Thank you that each one of us will do something of eternal value every day to give You all the glory. Amen.

Be blessed!

Love you,

Edwina

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For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information.

Filed Under: Teens Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

A Daughter’s Worth: Week 3 / Day 4 – Concentrate on Inner Beauty

October 18, 2012 by

    
                

1 Peter 3:3-4

Your beauty should not come from outward adornment

such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes.

Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle quiet spirit,

which is of great worth in God’s sight.

I have been more of a plain Jane when it came to dressing up my outer appearance. My mother used to always ask me why I didn’t dress up more like my two sisters always did. I was always comfortable wearing my jeans and t-shirts, and I still am. Now there are times when I love to get all dolled up and wear very nice evening gowns and heels and make up and getting my hair done in an updo (as some call it). I think that there are occasions where all of us like to dress up really nice and celebrate.

Peter tells us that our beauty should come from on the inside. Have you met someone and everything about them just lit up? Their smile, personality, who they were on the inside, just leaped out of their skin? Well I have, and that person drew me closer to them. It is all the more exciting when they are a Christian and the Jesus that is on the inside of them jumps out at you and draws you closer to them. I have always been told to look at who a person was on the inside and not pay as much attention to who they were on the outside. My mother always told me to never judge a book by its cover; that is so true! I have picked up a lot of books and put them right back down after looking at the pictures on the cover/outside and my sister or a friend would come along later and tell me that the same book that I put back and didn’t give a chance by reading it, was a phenomenal book…a GREAT read! Of course, I immediately went back and purchased the book or checked it out at the library, but you see, if I had given the book a chance, read the summary, or opened the book and read the first page or two, I would have been hooked!

Psalm 19:14

Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight.

Oh Lord my strength and my Redeemer

It is the same with people. We have to give people a chance. We need to stop looking at where they live, what color they are, where they go to school, who their parents are, or whether they have parents or not, what clothes they are wearing, hairstyles, etc… It is so important to give people a chance by looking at their inner beauty. Try and get to know someone this week that is not like you or may not live in your neighborhood and tell me what you find out about that person in the following weeks. I am sure that you will be surprised in a GREAT way! Give it a try!!

When you allow people to see who you are on the inside that is who they need to see. It is not fun to try and pretend to be someone that you are not. It takes up too much of your time to try and be someone else. Be yourself. Be who God intended for you to be!!!

 

Start with your heart and look within. Is God pleased with who you are? If you are not, ask Him to help you change into the young lady that He desires for you to be. God wants all of His daughters to shine from within! He loves you and so do we! GCH: Decaf thinks…no, we know, that you girls are something pretty awesome and we are going to continue to do our best to pour into you what God would have for us to give you.

Dear Lord,

Please help each girl in GCH: decaf to know that it is their inner beauty that is so attractive to people. It is what You use to bring people closer to You and it is Your way of allowing them to see You for who You are and who You desire for them to be. It is what is on the inside that matters most. Yes, they can look beautiful on the outside, and yes it is important to look your best, but it is who they are on the inside that You will use for Your Glory. Lord, I thank you for each girl and I pray that You speak to their hearts and give them the makeover of all times! Your makeover! It’s in Jesus’ name that I pray. Amen.

Love you bunches,

Tonya <3

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For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information.

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Filed Under: Teens Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , ,

A Daughter’s Worth: Week 3 / Day 2 – Refute Satan’s Lies

October 16, 2012 by

 

TRUTH

Today, we are going to start with truth.  If we don’t know what TRUTH is, then we won’t know what a LIE is when we see it or hear it.  “Satan would love for us to believe the lie of “not good enough.” (A Daughter’s Worth, p. 32)  If Satan can distract us from the TRUTH of who God made us to be, then we feel like we are not good enough.  Feelings are deceptive, so we need to know what truth is before our feelings get involved.  Sometimes we need to tell our emotions what we KNOW is true so we don’t get distracted.

Look at 2 Corinthians 11:3:  I am afraid that just as Eve was deceived by the serpent’s cunning, your minds may somehow be led astray from your sincere and pure devotion to Christ.  Eve was created perfectly, by our perfect God.  She walked in the Garden and talked with God personally.  It was only when Satan began to mess with her head that she began to doubt who she was created to be.  We need to know who we are in Christ so that when doubt creeps in, we don’t believe the LIES that will destroy our hearts.  If Eve could be so easily deceived, we should not think that we can resist the devil when he wants to sneak those bad thoughts into our heads.  We have to know the truth about what and who He says we are.  We find out what God sees in us by getting to know him by reading his word and talking to him.

One of the neatest things about having eight daughters is that I have proof of how God can make us so individual, unique and BEAUTIFUL.  No two daughters are alike, but they are all the same.  God has gifted them in very different ways.  I don’t expect them to react the same way, be good at the same subjects in school, wear the same style of clothes, or reach the same kind of people as their sisters.  Wherever we go, we bring a party.  Some are planners, some are preparers, some are entertainment, but ALL of them are fun.  Sometimes one will be feeling down and we try to show her how blessed she is and how accepted she is.  We acknowledge her feelings, but emphasize the TRUTH of the matter.

When one of my girls says, “I’m not smart enough”, it usually means – I wish I was smarter or had made better choices.  Then we talk about how we can choose better next time.  When they say “I’m not pretty”, it usually means they are comparing themselves to someone else, or someone has made fun of some part of them that day.  Those days we talk about what makes them unique and how no other daughter on the face of the planet can be them.  When one of my girls thinks they have no talent or special gifts they are usually thinking about someone they admire who is gifted in a certain area and has not looked at the ways God has gifted them to serve.  We are all unique!!!!!  God made each of us special!  There could never be a more beautiful you than you are to your Heavenly Father.  When you feel those doubts creep in, and they will creep in, push them out with the TRUTH of God’s Word.

“Protect the Father’s truth with everything you have.  How?  When Satan tries to distract you, confront the lie with scripture, combat deceit with prayer, and ignore the negative messages that Satan suggests.  Thank God for His TRUTH.  Ask Him to HELP you, His precious daughter, to EMBRACE (believe) it.” (p. 33)

Let’s PRAY:

We thank you Father that you have called us daughters.  We thank you for sending your Son to us to enable us to refute the lies of the enemy of our souls.  Help us to recognize your voice.   We love you Father.  Help us to ACCEPT your love.      AMEN

“And because you are sons (DAUGHTERS), God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, “ABBA! Father!”  Galatians 4:6

 

The TRUTH is…God Loves YOU!  I love you!  Your leaders love you!  Have a blessed day, girlfriends.

 

Mama T

 

For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information.

 

Filed Under: Teens Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

A Daughter’s Worth: Week 3 – Embracing True Beauty

October 14, 2012 by

 

My dear sisters….

We’ve made it to week 3 and this week we get to dive into embracing our true beauty! This is something I struggled with so much as a teen and into my adult years as well. It wasn’t until very recently that I finally feel good in my own skin and have embraced me for who I am. I pray that the Lord shows you through our lessons this week how to embrace your divine true beauty and be confident in how God do wonderfully and perfectly created YOU!!!

Monday, Diane will be posting all about appreciating God’s handiwork. Teresa will be bringing a message about refuting Satan’s lies to you on Tuesday. On Wednesday, you will hear from Jordan about watching what you see. Tonya will be blogging on Thursday about concentrating on your inner beauty and on Friday, you will hear from Edwina about being able to see your eternal value. I also hope that you have been enjoying Coleen’s Saturday blogging series about prayer. What a blessing! She will be back with another installment this Saturday as well!

Let’s pray:

Lord, we come to you this week asking you to help us to appreciate how you divinely made us. We ask You to show us so clearly how You want us to combat the lies that satan fills our heads with and replace those lies with Your promises and truths. Help us to find our acceptance only through You, Father, and help us to concentrate on our inner beauty… the way you so divinely created each of us. Lord, we seek to find our eternal value in You and we thank you so much for all You will show us through this week’s lessons. It is in Your Son’s mighty name we pray, amen <3

Be a blessing,

<3 Megan

Jonny Diaz…. “A More Beautiful You”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ks3R2BwyO0

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For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information

Filed Under: Teens Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , ,

Lord Teach Us To Pray: Part 3

October 13, 2012 by

Today we continue a series entitled Lord, teach us to pray! Do you ever cry out with that same desire as Jesus’ disciples did ––”Teach {me} to pray”?

 

Each Saturday over the next couple of months, we will intentionally pursue asking the Lord to do just that—teach us to pray. I believe that, as we continue to look at learning how to pray through the Scriptures, we will develop into daughters who pray—who delight, yearn, love to pray to their Father. This is my heart’s desire.

Jesus was asked this important question by His disciples. One of the places that it is recorded is in Luke 11, verse 1: “Then He was praying in a certain place; and when He stopped, one of His disciples said to Him, Lord, teach us to pray….” Listen to the words that He spoke to them when they asked:

Pray, therefore, like this: Our Father Who is in heaven, hallowed (kept holy) be Your name. Your kingdom come, Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven (left, remitted, and let go of the debts, and have given up resentment against) our debtors. And lead (bring) us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one. For Yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen. Matthew 6:9-13

The first week, in this series, we focused on the very first, and most important aspect, of Jesus’ instruction—addressing God Almighty as: “Our Father….” We found that He wants to be our Father…our Abba Father! We learned that ‘Abba!’ (today we would say ‘Daddy!’ or ‘Papa!’) is used when talking about “a close, familiar, and usually affectionate or loving personal relationship with another person.”

Last week we looked at the very next aspect of prayer that Jesus deemed of importance—“Who is in heaven.” Jesus’ first attribute relating to God showed the depth of relationship we have with God. This next attribute also pertains to relationship but tells of the utmost importance of Who God is. He is in heaven. And we also were reminded of an awesome promise from God—in the coming ages, you and I will be seated together with Jesus in the heavens (Ephesians 2:4-8). We will dwell for all eternity with Jesus and our Father, Who is in heaven.

This week, as we follow Jesus’ instruction, we come to the third aspect referring to Almighty God— “hallowed (kept holy) be Your name.” Holy is an adjective, it describes. One definition of holy is: exalted or worthy of complete devotion as one perfect in goodness and righteousness. Another definition would be: (applied to the Supreme Being,) holy signifies perfectly pure, immaculate and complete in moral character. My understanding of our Lord’s instruction is that Jesus is not speaking about His Father’s actual name but metaphorically that His Father’s “name” is Who He is. The phrase could be stated as, “…holy are You….”

Throughout the Scriptures, we see God described as ‘holy’ many times:

But You are holy, O You Who dwell in [the holy place where] the praises of Israel [are offered]. (Psalms 22:3)

Are not You from everlasting, O Lord my God, my Holy One? (Habakkuk 1:12)

And one cried to another and said, Holy, holy, holy is the Lord of hosts; the whole earth is full of His glory! (Isaiah 6:3)

And [now] I am no more in the world, but these are [still] in the world, and I am coming to You. Holy Father, keep in Your Name [ in the knowledge of Yourself] those whom You have given Me, that they may be one as We [are one]. (John 17:11)

And I also heard the angel of the waters say, Righteous (just) are You in these Your decisions and judgments, You Who are and were, O Holy One! (Revelation 16:5)

Just in these five examples, we see the Almighty God, our Father, ascribed by the Psalmist as ‘You are holy’…that the prophet Habakkuk called Him ‘my Holy One’…that Isaiah saw in a vision God seated on His throne with the seraphim proclaiming ‘holy, holy, holy’…that Jesus our Lord prayed ‘Holy Father’…that one of the seven angels praised Almighty God saying ‘You Who are and were ‘O Holy One.’ There is no doubt Who each of these examples is speaking about—our Father. And there is no denying the great adulation, adoration, worship, and praise that is being communicated to our Father.

And, as such, we are to praise and worship and adore Him with that same heart…He is holy, holy, holy. What a privilege that the our Father, Who is in heaven, would allow us to come before Him and call Him ‘Holy!’ Oh. How. He. Loves. Us. So. <3

He is holy, holy, holy!

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This week we have talked about accepting our Father’s love. We have considered that He wanted us to be born; that He delights in us; that He protects us and He forgives us; as well as that He give us great advice. Possibly you have had to make a few changes in your thinking toward yourself in light of just how MUCH God loves you. Probably you are thinking more in alignment with God’s thinking about you. Perhaps you are even thinking of yourself in the same way that God thinks of you. Here is more truth that God thinks about you; consider this, daughter of God ….

But as the One Who called you is holy, you yourselves also be holy in all your conduct and manner of living. For it is written, You shall be holy, for I am holy. 1st Peter 1:13-17

Clothe yourselves therefore, as Gods own chosen ones (His own picked representatives), [who are] purified and holy and well-beloved [by God Himself, by putting on behavior marked by] tenderhearted pity and mercy, kind feeling, a lowly opinion of yourselves, gentle ways, [and] patience…. Colossians 3:12

So I ask you to add this to your new thinking: How much worth, ______ (insert your name here), do you have if you are holy {as Your Father Who is in heaven}is holy.

“…Holy be Your Name..”

with love,

Coleen

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2w_fdyLRvmE

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For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information

Filed Under: Teens Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , ,

A Daughter’s Worth: Week 2 / Day 5: Your Father Gives Great Advice

October 12, 2012 by

 

Today’s blog post is by Tina Marin 

Growing up in the south has its advantages, unless you are in a really rural area. I was protected and very naive when I went off to college and I can tell you folks had fun with me. You see I was very trusting and took what folks said literally. I wanted to trust that what others said were true and that they were not being hurtful or mean. I mean, if an adult said something, you were not to doubt what they said correct? How old were you when you learned not to trust what an adult told you something. Well, guess what? There is an adult out there that you can trust. He is our heavenly Father.

Jesus stated in John 10:27 ‘My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me.’ How do I get to know Jesus and his Father? By making the effort to communicate with God and spending time thinking about how he created us to be unique and to have a special purpose that only we can fulfill.  By reading his word and getting it into my heart, I can give that love to others. I do not always succeed. Life gets in the way and I let it become too complicated. I try to find some quiet time and some way to show God how grateful I am that He chose me to be is child. How do I do this?  It may be as easy as saying thank you in the morning before you get out of bed. It  may be choosing to listen to music that does not irritate your parents.

Proverbs 2:1-6 Instructs us to receive God’s words and to seek wisdom, then we will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of the Lord. What may that look like to you? It could be as easy as listening to scripture and thinking about a verse that really stuck out while you were listening. It could be speaking with someone more knowledgeable than you in the Bible. Or it could be reading a book that speak about God’s love.

As we finish out this week, think about James 1:5. “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.” Repeat this verse by inserting your name,  “If any of you lacks wisdom, let Tina ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given her”…. and see how it changes your thinking and your attitude toward life and others around you. It takes on a different meaning and feel. God does care about what you do, what you say and how you think. He wants you to be his daughter and to know that he is always there to help you when you reach out to him for guidance or to just say “hi” and tell him about your day.

Let’s pray:

Heavenly Father, I thank you that you love me and that you want me to grow in wisdom and knowledge. Thank you for this opportunity to learn more about your character and build on mine. Help me be the young woman you have planned for me to be. In Jesus’ precious name I pray, AMEN!

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For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information

Filed Under: Teens Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

A Daughter’s Worth – Week 2 / Day 4: Your Father Forgives You

October 11, 2012 by

 

Your blog today is brought to you by Memphis T and Mama T <3

Oh My!  This has been a tough topic for me to think about in my lifetime.  Growing up, my dad was, and still is a very hard worker.  He always worked his full time job, grew acres of vegetables on our farm and was active in our church.  My whole family worked around dad’s schedule.  It was rarely easy to keep up and do everything the way he needed it to be done.  When we messed up, and we did mess up, dad would go silent…until he blew up…and then he was silent for weeks at a time.  Sometimes we knew what was wrong, most of the time we didn’t though and that was hard to try to fix.

Girls have a basic need to please.  We especially need to please our fathers.  That is why it is so hard when we have messed up for us not to know how to make it better.  As a young teen I tried very hard to win my dad’s approval and to see him smile or say, “Thanks, gal”, or something.  I needed that from him.  As an older teen I began looking for approval from my uncles and wanted to have a boyfriend to care about me.  I have some really cool uncles.  I messed up a lot in the boyfriend area, but that’s another story for another day.  I have learned a lot and been so blessed with the men God placed in my life.  I got the laughs and hugs and teasing I needed in that way; but not from my dad.

This is by no means a sad story, because I love my dad very much and I know he loves me.  It could be that we are too much alike to express ourselves well, or maybe he didn’t have a good example of a relational father either.  The main thing I learned from my home life was what I wanted to do LIKE my parents raised me and the things I wanted to CHANGE when I had my own family.  Mostly I learned how to lean on my Heavenly Father when I needed that ABBA, daddy, role filled.  God never let me down.  When I messed up, I could ask Him to show me what had gone wrong, where I had gone wrong and to forgive me for my sins.  He was always faithful to forgive me; I had a harder time forgiving myself.

As I have learned to parent my daughters, I have always told them to be honest with me.  Even if it is hard to say what they have done, I would rather know what happened from them than to hear it from someone else or be surprised by the truth later.  I have made them a promise to be patient and slow to anger with my words so that they will trust me with their hearts.  I like to think that this is a lesson I learned from my Heavenly Father.

Jesus said, “Let the children come to me” (Mark 10:14), “Unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven” (Matthew 18:3) and in Matthew 19:13 we see that parents were bringing their children to Jesus so he could lay hands on them to pray for them and give them blessings.  I wanted to be that kind of mom someday.  I wanted to be the kind of mother that my kids could come to for comfort, talking, mutual respect and love and I wanted their friends to feel comfortable talking to me too.  It took breaking some bad learned parenting behaviors, but God has been faithful to bring me children and teens to love on.  He gave me a desire of my heart.

No matter what kind of earthly dad, or parents you were born with, God wants to be your FATHER.  With that comes love, guidance and, yes, discipline.  Discipline is not a bad word.  It means having self-control.  We don’t act on every whim and do what feels good, just because it feels good.  Our verse for today is:  Hebrews 10:22, “Let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water.”  God wants us to come to him and tell him what is on our hearts and minds.  Take some time today to think back to those “secret” things you have stuffed down inside your heart and tell HIM about it.  He already knows, but HE wants to hear you say it so you know you are clean.  No more guilty conscience.  No more beating yourself up about something in your past.  Just you and HIM.  God sees you through the filter of His Son, Jesus.  You look pretty good, you know.  Embrace the Father’s love.  You deserve it!

<3 Mama T (Teresa)

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There is nothing so horrible or terrible that God cannot or will not forgive you for <3 God sent His one and only son Jesus to die on the cross for our sins so that we would have the opportunity to live in eternity with Him. How awesome is that?

John 3:16

For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son,

that whosoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.

Have you ever did anything that you thought was so bad that you thought your parents would never forgive you for, and once you told them, they weren’t as mad as you thought they would be and things changed for the better? Well that is how God is J Satan would love to hold those old horrible things over your head, having you to think and believe that God will be angry with you for the rest of your life and never forgive you (while typing this, satan is trying to persuade me to not tell you all about what happened to me years ago because it was a very difficult time for me and my family, but it is part of who I am and it shows how God forgave me for something that I thought was so horrible at the time).  God is totally the opposite girls!! He is so loving and forgiving!!! He wants you to come to Him and repent (to tell Him that you are sorry and turn away from that thing that you were doing wrong) and live your life for Him. He is always waiting there with His big loving arms held open for you to run to Him. He desires to be there for you!

I can remember doing something that I thought was so bad. We are friends and we can be honest with each other here at GCH: Decaf. I was 20 years old, not married, working in ministry, and I got pregnant…yep, there it is…I said it, Ms. Tonya got pregnant. I felt like I had disappointed my mom and dad, my sisters, my boss, Pastor, friends…everybody, but most of all I felt like I had let God down!! I knew what God had said about getting pregnant before being married and I definitely was not married. Were the special, important people in my life disappointed in me? Yes they were. Did they ever stop loving me? No they did not!

It took me a while to heal from that time in my life. I had to really get to know who God was better than I thought I did. He wasn’t this mean old person who was going to point His finger at me and shake it and say, “Tonya, you make the biggest mistake ever and I am no longer keeping you as my daughter!” He was exactly the opposite. Our Heavenly Father loved on me! He sent people around me to comfort me, teach me more about His Word, and help me to get back on the right path of following and living a life for Him!

Remember this: When God forgives you. You are set free!!! You are free from being reminded of that thing that you did wrong and you are free to go to God whenever you need to!

When God forgives you, He forgives you and He remembers it NO More!! We are the ones who remember. God does not desire to torture us with reminding us of what we did wrong, He wants us to ask for forgiveness, turn away from that thing that were doing wrong, learn from it, and move forward. He is so forgiving!! Humans can hold grudges, God does NOT! Whatever it is that you think is so horrible that you think you cannot go to God about, think again, He wants you to come to Him! Try Him …Go to Him… Allow Him to show you who He really is! A loving Father who LOVES His daughters.. ALL of us 🙂

Let’s Pray:

Dear Heavenly Father, thank you so much for loving us for who we are. We are so grateful to be called your daughters. Thank you for being a loving, forgiving God and for reminding us that there is nothing so bad that You will not forgive us for. Please remind your daughters Lord that You are there for them, and that You still desire to have that Father daughter relationship with them. Let them know that You are waiting. In your Son’s Jesus name I pray. Amen.

<3 Memphis T (Tonya)

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For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information

Filed Under: Teens Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

A Daughter’s Worth – Week 2 / Day 3: Your Father Protects You

October 10, 2012 by

Psalm 91:4-10

His huge outstretched arms protect you– under them you’re perfectly safe; His arms will fend off all harm.

Fear nothing… No harm will even graze you. You’ll stand untouched…

Yes, because God is your refuge, the High God your very own home,

Evil can’t get close to you; harm can’t get through the door.

I don’t know about you, but I have had some friendships and relationships in my life that have ended. I have had some things I was passionate about taken away. I have experienced loss. And each time, it hurt.

One day I was madly “in love” with a guy, and the next day I was bawling my eyes out because he dumped me. Or one day “Suzy” was my very best friend, and the next day she was ignoring me. One day I was obsessed with cheerleading, and the next day, I was injured and lost the nerve to try any more stunts or tumbling. And with each loss, I experienced heartache and pain.

I can honestly say, though, with every break up, with every weekend I spent at home, with the activities I gave up, I found the purpose. Not the day after. In some cases, it took months. Other cases, it took years. Each time I found that the Lord was protecting me. From what, you may be asking? Most of the time, I find that the Lord is protecting us from ourselves. Here’s what I mean by that… We often turn boyfriends, friends, sports, grades, etc. into idols. We place them as first in our hearts. We seek THEIR approval. Sometimes we make EVERY decision with them in mind…. from how we wear our hair that morning to where we want to go to college.

We are setting ourselves up for heartbreak by allowing a person or an activity to dictate our lives. Sometimes boys change their minds. Sometimes friends have bad days and take them out on you. Sometimes you fail a test. Sometimes you lose a soccer game. But God doesn’t change His mind about you. God doesn’t have bad days. God is faithful. He is constant. He is the same… yesterday, today, and forever.

I think it’s safe to say that He knows what is best for us. After all, He created our hearts. And even when something precious to us is taken away, we HAVE to trust that He is making all things work together for our good. So let’s put Him first. Let pleasing Him be the reason behind all of our decisions.

Let’s pray~

Lord, thank You for loving us enough to protect us. You know that You are the only one who is constant, and You love us enough to protect our hearts. Continue to teach us to guard our hearts. Lord, when we place things above You, give us strength and conviction to lay those things down. And after we lay those things down, God, we will run into Your arms, we will return to our First Love.

~Jordan

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For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email megan@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information

Filed Under: Teens Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , ,

A Daughter’s Worth Week 2 / Day 2: Your Father Delights in Your Existence

October 9, 2012 by

Zephaniah 3:17

The Lord your God is with you; He is mighty to save. 

He will take great delight in you; He will quiet you with His love;

He will rejoice over you with singing.

Delight is a word that isn’t used very often.  Delight is one of those words with deep meaning.  I looked it up so we could know more fully how God feels about us and this is what I found:

DELIGHT

1) A Feeling of extreme pleasure or satisfaction; JOY

2)  To please greatly

3)  Something or someone that provides a source of happiness.

Growing up I can’t say that ‘delight’ was in my vocabulary.  Aside from a few pictures, the emotion of ‘delight’ was foreign to me.  So the thought that my Heavenly Father took delight in my existence was a little hard to grasp.  I have always been a “thinker”.  When I have questions about random, everyday stuff I ‘google’ it.  My head is full of trivial information that I don’t even know where it came from.  When I have BIG questions I go to “The Source”.  I ask God, himself, to give me the answers to my hearts questions.  As a result, my heart is full of TRUTH and I DO know where I got it; My Father!  Check out Luke 11:9: “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.”

Not only does He want us to ask, He wants us to KEEP asking.  Jesus said in Matthew 7:7-8, “Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for.  Keep on seeking, and you will find (what you are looking for).  Keep on Knocking and the door will be opened to you.  For everyone who asks, receives.  Everyone who seeks, finds and everyone who knocks, the door will be opened.”

Did you catch that promise directly from your Father?  So when we have questions and need answers we are to ask him and He promises to give us whatever we have asked for.  So if that is true – why don’t we know everything and have everything we need?  In James 4:2-3, we find the answer to that question (you see how I did that?  I took you back to the Source).

James said, “…You have NOT because you ASKED NOT.”  As a mom, there is nothing that gives me more joy, more delight, than to give my daughters something I know they really, really, REALLY want.  Most of the time, what my daughters want is not monetary.  They desire my time, my touch, my ears to listen to their hearts.  Sometimes I can show them I have really listened to them by remembering to do something nice for them.  I want to be the one who provides this very basic need for my daughters.  If it makes me that happy to please my daughters, how much more happy, joyous, delighted – must God the Father be to know that He provides for us exactly what we want and need?  Because we are God’s daughters, he wants to provide for us.

In Psalms 37:4 it says, “Take delight in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart.”  Because God created us, HE KNOWS US.  We may go through life feeling unloved, without friends, lonely, and well, UN-known.  But our heavenly father knows what we need and gives us a very specific example in the way He acknowledged Jesus on the day he was baptized.

Let’s look at that day in Jesus’ life.  He was about 30 years old, he knew what his purpose was on this earth and he knew it was time to begin the work.  I imagine the human side of Jesus was nervous to get started, anxious about what was in his future, and a bit overwhelmed at the sheer size of his job.  He had come TO SAVE THE WORLD! Where do you start?  Who do you start with?

Jesus started at the beginning.  He decided to do the job he came to this earth for.  The first public act of his obedience was to be baptized, so he went to see his cousin, John.  (You should really go read that story.  It’s awesomely cool)

Matthew 3:16-17 takes us to the next part of Jesus’ story.

16)  After his baptism, as Jesus came up out of the water, the heavens were opened and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and settling on him. 17) And a voice from heaven said, “This is my dearly loved Son, who brings me great joy.”

God gave Jesus the 3 things everyone needs to hear:

1)       God claimed Jesus as His own son.  “This is my SON.”

2)      God proclaimed His love for Jesus.  “Whom I love.”

3)      God exclaimed His Joy, Delight, and Extreme Pleasure with his Son.  “I am very pleased with him.”

I imagine that Jesus needed to know who he belonged to; who loved him and who was pleased with him to be able to begin the job God sent him to do.  If Jesus needed it, so do we.  It’s OK to admit that we need to belong, be loved and be delighted in.

That’s how God made us!!!!!

“Realizing God’s delight in your existence is a wonderful ego booster.  Your Creator, the Father of everything, is always happy to hang out with you.”  (page 18, A Daughter’s Worth)  God delights in our delighting in Him.  God values our valuing Him.  Who can tell me where the verse is in the BIBLE where it says, “We love him because He first loved us”?  (Trivia Contest – Leave the answer in the comment section)  🙂

God already has claimed us as his daughters.  He has already proven he loves us.  He gives us the desires of our hearts because it brings Him joy and pleasure.  Now it’s up to us ….

Let Us Pray:

Heavenly Father, I thank you for being my dad, my papa, my ABBA.  Thank you for loving me, for telling the world that you love me and for providing everything that I need.  I am honored to be your daughter.  I accept the place you have reserved for me in your family.  My earthly family doesn’t always look or feel very loving and secure, but I know your love for me never fails. 

Father, continue to change my heart as I draw closer to you.  I love you daddy.  AMEN

<3 Teresa Bolme

VIDEO     Mighty To Save  sung by Laura Story (scripture taken from Zephaniah 3:17

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For the A Daughter’s Worth Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website from clicking the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage.

If you are interested in joining us in our GCH:decaf Teen Girls Ministry, please click the sign-up form button at the top of our webpage. Just follow the instructions on the form and hit submit. We’ll be happy to add you to one of our Online Bible Study Groups! Our new study is A Daughter’s Worth! Please email teens@girlfriendscoffeehour.com for more information.

Filed Under: Teens Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , ,
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