November 5, 2024

I’m Not Who I Was

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I wish you could see me now
I wish I could show you how
I’m not who I was
I used to be mad at you
A little on the hurt side too
But I’m not who I wasI found my way around
To forgiving you
Some time ago
But I never got to tell you soI found us in a photograph
I saw me and I had to laugh
You know, I’m not who I was
You were there, you were right above me
And I wonder if you ever loved me
Just for who I wasWhen the pain came back again
Like a bitter friend
It was all that I could do
To keep myself from blaming you

I reckon it’s a funny thing
I figured out I can sing
Now I’m not who I was
I write about love and such
Maybe ’cause I want it so much
I’m not who I was

I was thinking maybe I
I should let you know
I am not the same
But I never did forget your name
Hello

Well the thing I find most amazing
In amazing grace
Is the chance to give it out
Maybe that’s what love is all about

I wish you could see me now
I wish I could show you how
I’m not who I was

Listen while you read…

~  Singer / Songwriter: Brandon Heath  ~

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About 6 years ago, I started mending fences and rebuilding relationships with people I had really hurt during a really horrible time in my life.  I was in a slimy pit and I was stuck there for a while.  I hurt everyone that I held most dear and  loved the most.  Can you relate?  Is there anyone in your life that you want to tell them that you aren’t that same person that you were?  Now that Jesus is first in your life again, or maybe for the first time, you want to shout it from the rooftops that your life looks so different now.  Your light shines only for Him.  You aren’t that same gossip that used to tell what you heard about others.  You aren’t that same jealous friend that wasn’t happy for the good things that happened for others.  You aren’t that same person that held a grudge instead of giving grace and forgiveness.  And doesn’t it feel good?

Brandon Heath wrote this song about his stepmom.  After his father and she got a divorce, he lost touch with her.  He didn’t try to reach out to her.  Many birthdays and holidays went by without even so much as a card.  Later, when his life was radically changed and Jesus took the wheel, he wanted her to know that he had changed.  He wasn’t that same man and he wanted her to know that he actually cared about her…he even loved her.  What an amazing story of how our Jesus takes lives and redeems them and rebuilds them and makes it so good that we want to shout it from the rooftops!

The line “I figured out I can sing, I’m not who I was” tells me that when you give your life to Jesus and you allow Him to live through you, you find gifts that He has given you that you never knew you had.  What is your life like now?  Can you go back through and see where He has changed you?  Guess what!  You don’t have to speak any words for people will know Who you serve and follow by the way you live now.  You will live your amends and apologies, and people will see the grace that you so readily give instead of holding grudges.  I’m praying with you today that our lives will reflect Him and that we will live the abundant life because we have been totally transformed!

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Let us pray:  Dear Lord, You still change lives radically and change us from the inside out.  You fill us with Your Spirit and we cannot help but smile and spread the joy that we have.  Thank You for the gift of forgiveness that we can readily forgive those that wrong us.  We give up the sins of our past and start living out our amends to those we have wronged.  Oh Lord, we love You!  And we are no longer who we were!  In Jesus name, amen.