Girls, I want to be honest with you from the start, this chapter was a struggle for me. As I read through it, a lot of feelings of shame and embarrassment came up for me. Feelings I honestly didn’t even know I had. Then followed the thoughts of, “How am I ever going to talk to these women about purity, when as a single, never married mom, it is obvious I am not “pure”.” I can say this much to you all. I have been saved for 3 ½ years, and I have made the commitment to remain pure until the Lord sees fit to show me the man He has planned for me. I have not had a perfect past, but I ask for your grace as we travel through this topic of purity together.
We live in such a sexually charged society don’t we? Sexual promiscuity seems more the norm than the exception to the rule. Yet as Jesus girls, we are held to a higher standard, we have a higher calling. God wants better for us. The temptations to compromise physically are all around us, but we are called to be ladies of purity.
This is not a situation unique to 2012. If you look back to the time of Ruth, her story took place in the time of the judges – a time of disobedience, idolatry and violence. These were dark days for Israel, when “everyone did as he saw fit.” Sound familiar? So to think that Ruth had it any easier than we do in modern society would be fooling ourselves. So how do we, like Ruth, safeguard our special treasure and stay women of purity? We will spend the next week trying to figure it all out together.
The deadliest deception we face in today’s society is that we should seek its ultimate pleasures because that will give us the least pain. More often than not, the exact opposite is true. As far as guidance on the topic of sex before marriage, look no farther than our Heavenly Father. God intends for us to enjoy the pleasure of sex within marriage only. The joy of such an intimate act between two people is maximized when both of you remain pure. We, especially as women, can get caught up in the fantasy of it, the romance of it, but there is always the truth, His truth: Sex is special! Not sensuous sex, but satisfying sex in your Creator’s will and time.
We are worth more my dear women of faith. We are worth more than a temporary pleasure that is likely to lead to the sting of regret. We are worth more than having a man try to lure you into something you don’t want, by using manipulation. We are worth the joy and pleasure and love that our Heavenly Father has waiting for us. Believe it, believe Him.
LET’S PRAY
Father, it is so easy for us to be lured by the traps of today’s society and the pleasure seeking, selfish ways of this world. But we know you have so much more for us. We are a precious gift, not to be given away freely. Help to give us strength when we feel weak. Show each and every woman reading this her worth. We are special, and in Your strength we prepare to give ourselves only to the man you have chosen specifically for us in your will and in your time. We ask this in Your Holy Name. Amen.
YOUR ASSIGNMENT
Is staying pure a difficult aspect to your single life? Is it something that is easy for you to cope with? In either situation, why do you think that is? What strategies do you have, or can you come up with, to help stay pure in today’s world?
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About Michelle Graziano
Michelle, thank you so much for this post! It is so comforting that God does not hold our past against us and that our past does not define us! It is so comforting for me to see that you are making a commitment to be pure until you are married, that support is huge! So many others in our society laugh at that kind of a commitment. Thank you for being an amazing, PURE, woman of God. As far as your assignment goes, It is kind of complicated for me. Because of my past I am to the point that when I think about having sex with my husband I get really worried about it. This is something that I have worked through and is getting better and better, BUT as I wait and am single, I find that my mind goes places it shouldn't with people it shouldn't. I am constantly renewing my mind and praying for God's protection. I find that the more you follow that gut feeling that you really dont want to follow because lets face it making out with a guy can be fun….the more pure you stay and the more obedient you are to the Lord and he definitely blesses that!
Oh Diane, I completely understand where you are coming from. It IS hard in this day and age to stay pure (especially when people know I haven't been in the past, like "what's the big deal") I have even been told I'll never get married because I won't have premarital sex. I can't wait til the day I can throw that in his face! 🙂
Thank you for sharing your heart with us, Michelle. You made me think…… you know, I don;t even recall anyone talking to me as a child, about staying pure until marriage. I think my parents wanted that for me and I remember being told that "my body was a sacred temple" but I don't recall ever being told WHY I should and what would come with not staying pure. I'm glad my kids BOYS AND GIRLS are being given all the information <3
It's funny that you mention that, because I didn't grow up a believer (I grew up Catholic) and it was never mentioned either. It never seemed like something that was important in my family. My mom even told me once, as I was getting older, "You know you don't have to be married to have a baby" :-/ (She wanted to be a grandma) So that's the attitude I grew up with.
michelle, thank you for sharing yours AND God's heart on this matter. y'know, we ALL–single, married, female, male, teen, older woman–have to adhere to this standard of purity. purity is a matter of the heart. so if we deal with our hearts by holding God's truth in our minds, by asking God to help us to change our hearts, by renewing our minds through Jesus' accomplishments, then our actions will follow along. i'm thinking of romans 12:2 "Do not be conformed to this world ,[fashioned after and adapted to its external, superficial customs], but be transformed (changed) by the [entire] renewal of your mind [by its new ideals and its new attitude], so that you may prove [for yourselves] what is the good and acceptable and perfect will of God, even the thing which is good and acceptable and perfect [in His sight for you]." <3
Thanks Coleen, I prayed hard before, during, and after writing this one. Still not easy, but oh so important!
I know for a fact that no one talked to be about staying pure for marriage, when I was young. I wish they had!! I wouldn't have made the mistakes that I did! We MUST understand the importance of waiting for the marriage bed, when it comes to our sex lives!! I wish I could share with you WHY I say this!!! But that time will come. Just PLEASE take my word for it, STAY PURE FOR YOUR MARRIAGE BED!!!