Today’s lesson is brought to you by Tonya Ellison – GCH Singles Ministry
I want to be a woman of God. I want my thoughts and actions to glorify Him. I want to find my worth in Him before I look for that love and validation in any other person. I want to develop a relationship with Him before I invest time into any other relationship. How do I fully embrace this?
When I started reading this book last week I came up with a little saying on these three sections:
Person, Place and Faith
(because faith is more than just a thing)
New friends (person): Who am I allowing to influence me? How many times have I found myself spending time with friends and something just didn’t feel right? I’ve been in seasons in my life where I have to stand back and ask God and myself “How did I get here? What’s the deal? And to be perfectly honest I didn’t consider my friends to be part of the problem. I’m grown, I’m not doing what they’re doing, and I’m just there spending time with them. I’m not letting them control my thoughts or actions either.
I was wrong. Like the authors said, I wasn’t spending time with other Christian women who encouraged me to live my life for God, women who “spurred” me forward on my journey. My friends weren’t necessarily pulling me down but they weren’t pushing me forward either.
I’m not sure if you’ve experienced this but being a Christian woman in today’s society isn’t always going to make you the most popular person in the group. I found myself looking the other way and ignoring the behaviors of my friends because I didn’t want to lose them as friends and because I didn’t want them to look at me differently, mainly because I didn’t want to feel alone.
“Do not be deceived: Bad company corrupts good morals”
1 Corinthians 15:33
New Surroundings (Places): I have to ask God where He wants me to be. Like the example in the book it can be something as minor as a choice between two activities, or something as big as a move across states. He has places picked out for us, whether it is a church, a job or a home. He knows where He wants us.
Surroundings pt. 2: Culture. The culture we find ourselves in today is not always the most growth producing place to be. I have to ask myself on a daily basis if I am reflecting a “Christ-like culture, or am I molding to the culture of the world? I understand how hard it is to not do as others do.
We need to reflect His culture;
we need to be influenced by his behavior.
New Faith: “…devoting as much energy to Jesus as I would in a relationship with a boyfriend.” Wow! I want to devote more to Him than I would, my husband, my kids, my job, my friends, more than everything. Without a true relationship with Him, without a true journey with Him, I am not going to become the woman He destined me to be.
I have to give Him my all
before I can give any part of me to anyone or anything else.
So, what does this all mean to me? I need to look at who I spend time with, where I spend my time, and my willingness and readiness to place all of my faith in God and focus on my relationship with Him.
Who and what am I allowing to stand in the way of my reckless abandonment?
Let’s Pray:
Lord, I pray that you open our eyes and our hearts to the new things we need in our lives. The new areas that will allow us to grow in your love and to be the women you destined us to be. Please help us to love our friends who have not broken their alabaster box at your feet without allowing them to influence our thoughts and actions. Please help us to seek your will when it comes to where we need to be, where we need to work, worship, live. Lord please give us strength when we walk our journey with you, when we choose your culture over the culture of the world. Thank you for your grace in this journey. Thank you for your hand on our lives as we strive towards reckless abandonment. In Jesus’ name Amen.
Your Assignment:
In the comment section below, please answer the following questions: What do you look for in friends? What do you do, or does a friend do for you in regards to encouraging growth, and a stronger relationship with God?
And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.
Hebrews 10:24
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Blessings,
Tonya
About Tonya Ellison
Great post Tonya, In answer to the questions you asked?
1. I look for friends who are honest and down to earth. Those who share my faith and who put me in the straight and narrow. I have very few people who I call friends because of this criteria but I am so grateful because it saves me a lot of time and it prevents me from gossiping about others.
2. I have friends for each season so to speak. When I am going through tough times, God places people in my path who will encourage and support me. My spiritual life is strengthened because of such friends and life is much easier because of them.
I notice that I have different people come into my life at different times. I am so thankful that God sends us the friends we need when we need them. 🙂
Great blog, Tonya!! I hadn't really thought about HOW I choose my friends. I don't go out. When I was working, most of the people were coworkers with a couple of exceptions. I realize now those few were either people that would build me up or people I was helping to build. Like Jackie, I have friends for seasons most of the time. One notable exception is my mother-in-love. She is always there. Sometimes I don't always appreciate what she brings to the table but she is always good for me and tries her best to help. I pray we have a Ruth-Naomi type of relationship. 🙂
Tracy, I LOVE your relationship with Sandy! It truly is an inspiring "in-law" or as you say "in-Love" relationship!!!
I love it, too! I couldn't have picked better if I had tried. 😉
I never thought about How yo choose my friends either, especially as an adult. It's something I need to keep my eyes open to.
Thanks for inspiring me this morning! I loved reading this blog post and the words, I want to find my worth in Him before I look for that love and validation in any other person. Blessings, Hugs in Him…
You're welcome. I think that finding our worth in Him is a message that He wants to get across to everyone. It's easy to get caught up in life and forget this. I thank Him for His reminders. 🙂
Thanks again Tonya for an amazing blog post! It really is important for us to do a self check of our friends, our surroundings and our faith. Thanks for the reminder 🙂 <3
Great blog post Tonya! We screen or try to, our children's friends but its equally important to be selective who we choose for our own friends.
Great blog and questions. What I look for in friends is actually answered with the aecond question. My friends have got to encourage my growth and reationship with Christ. I have come down a long road of recovery and found I need friends that understand I want my relationship with Christ to be the priority. I look for honesty, compassion, joy and peace in my friends. I do want honesty to the point of tough love so relationships don't simply turn into an agree and go on with the world type commitment. My circle keeps getting smaller and smaller concerning close friends. Many acquaintances but few close committed friends.
acquaintances- but few close committed ing for m
Sorry about last 2 lines – typo!! B-)
I have learned to pray for God to send me friends. The ones I have picked, were not true friends. what is important to me is their faith and their walk. God tends to bring people in my life that we will encourage each other. The majority of my friends are married. I am also very careful of my friendships with men. Because, I am a friendly person it can come across as flirting. I don't want to give mixed signals.