December 23, 2024

Captivating: Chapter 4 – The Messages of our Wounds

January 30, 2013 by

Three years ago, I stepped into the office of my counselor.  Nervous and excited (but mostly nervous) I was there to discuss my past relationships with men.  I was there to figure out how to forgive myself for the sins of my past.  I was there to talk about my ex-boyfriends and the issues in our relationships.  Boy, was I surprised when my counselor threw me a curve ball. We spent the majority of the time talking about the messages, rather the lies, I had come to believe about myself, about forgiveness, about relationships, and about God.

Our wounds produce the messages we believe.

These messages are exactly what the enemy wants us to believe, defend, and keep alive.  As we defend these messages daily through our actions and thoughts, we give the enemy victory.  But here’s the truth: the only power Satan has over us is the power that we give him.

I don’t know your story, I don’t know how you’ve been hurt in the past, and I don’t know how you may even be hurt in the future.  But God does.  God has messages for you to hear, too.  He’s waiting for you to trade in those evil messages that try to control you.  He wants to exchange those messages for His messages of affirmation, love, beauty, strength, boldness, self-worth, and perfection in Him.

Paul defines our methods of war against the enemy and his lies in 2 Corinthians 10:3-5.

For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does.  The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to DEMOLISH STRONGHOLDS <aka the messages, the lies>.  We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

So these weapons with which we fight…what are they? They are the spiritual armor of God found in Ephesians 6:14-17: the belt of truth, the breastplate of righteousness, the gospel of peace, the shield of faith, the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit.

Psalm34_4

 

So how do we gear up? I believe before we try to pile on all of the armor, we have to get rid of the stinky, smelly, worn-out rags we’ve been wearing until now.  They stink!  I encourage you to spend time today taking off those rags, removing those messages or lies that you’ve come to believe.  Some of the strongholds in your life may be apparent and some you may not know.  Ask God to reveal them to you.  Ask Him to remove the rags, to cleanse you, and prepare you for the future battles waged in your mind and in your heart.  David writes in Psalm 34:4, “I sought the LORD, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears.” He will deliver you, too.  All you must do is surrender your strongholds to Him, and let Him heal your heart.

Praise Him,

Carissa

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Let’s Pray

Heavenly Father, we praise You for the power You have and the power You’ve given to us through Your son, Jesus.  Father, the enemy’s lies are all around us; reveal those lies to us.  Help us to denounce each and every one of the strongholds in our lives, surrendering them to You.  Take them, Lord, they are Yours.  Cleanse our hearts and renew our minds as You have promised. In your precious Name, Amen.

Your Assignment

Sit with God today and ask Him to reveal the messages you may have come to believe. Denounce and surrender those messages to Him.

What are the things you have come to believe about yourself through hurts you experienced as a little girl?

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If you are interested in joining this Online Singles Bible Study, click HERE.  Once we receive your registration, we will email you further details.

If you would like to send Carissa a private email in regards to this blog post, you may email her at:  Carissa@GirlfriendsCoffeeHour.com

 

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Captivating – Chapter 3: Dominating Women – Desolate Women

January 23, 2013 by

I remember the moment like it was yesterday.  I was 8 years old and away from my family for the first time for a week of Kids Camp with my church.  It was one of the best, most memorable times of my childhood.  And the scene that follows left an immeasurable impression on my mind and heart.

While drying my hands in the bathroom, one of the counselors whom I greatly admired and loved, said to me, “Carissa, you’re so cute!” Boom.  The words were spoken, and those words felt so good.  I had a new goal.  I wanted to be “cute” all of the time.  I wanted to feel special, noticed, admired, and loved every day.

But the fact remains: I’m not as “cute” as I once was.  Over the past 17 years of my life, there have been way more “non-cute” comments directed my way.  And so, I’m sitting here, writing to you as a scarred and broken woman.  Because of the Fall, I’m cursed with a longing to be beautiful and irreplaceable. Since the world has shown me more coldness than warmth, I’m guarded.  I know I’m not alone in this either.  My guarded mindset is driven from fear—fear of being vulnerable.  Every woman deals with this fear differently.  The two main methods, pointed out by our authors of this book, are either domination or desolation.

So how do you deal?  Do you play the defense, trying to control your situation and others, sometimes even masking your controlling nature as “caring” for others?  Or are you a wallflower, preferring to be silent and unseen, thus also controlling your situation instead of surrendering it to God?

We must realize that these two attitudes are inspired by fear, a fear that was not sent from God.  Ladies, 1 John 4 affirms that “God is love.” And we know that “perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love.”  So if we live in love, then God lives in us and fear has no place to dwell.

So no matter which woman you identify with (either dominating or desolate…or maybe both) and no matter how much you try to control or how well you hide, God knows your heart.  He knows the motives behind everything you do.  He knows every thought, every attitude, every action, and every reaction.

“Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight.  Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of Him to whom we must give account” (Hebrews 4:13).

God wants you to know Him, too.  He wants you to know freedom from your fears and past hurts; He wants you to know the depth of His love for you.  He wants you to know that in His eyes, you are way more than “cute.”  You are beautiful and irreplaceable. He delights in you because you are captivating.

 

Praise Him,

 

Carissa

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Let’s Pray
Our beautiful and wonderful Savior, thank You for who You are, thank You for creating us in Your image, thank You for the beauty that you instilled in each woman.  Father, I pray that every day, we will wake to dwell in You because You are love.  I pray against the Evil One and his attacks on our hearts with fear and doubt.  Help us to daily surrender our lives to you – surrender our desires to both control and hide.  Father, we know that we can do all things through You because You are our strength.  In Your precious name we pray, Amen.

Your Assignment
Are you more dominating or desolate?  Can you see how these attitudes stem from fear?  What are some ways we can daily practice to abide in love and thus reveal the beauty within each of us?

 

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If you are interested in joining this online Bible study, please click HERE to sign up.

Once we receive your registration, we will email you further details.

 If you are interested in sending a private message to Carissa, please email her at CarissaMarkantone@GirlfriendsCoffeeHour.com

 

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