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I have a confession to make. My life is not perfect. I’m disappointed, saddened, and often angry at the events that mark my past and present. Things happened to me and by me that I cannot change. I find myself at a ‘cross’roads’. I have a choice to make: Do I let those events in my past define me and color the present I am living? Or do I confess my past and my present, give it to the One who truly loves me and live a future in Freedom and Purpose?
If I confess my hurts, my mistakes, my willful wrong choices, what will people think of me? I buried those things in my past so far down, no one will ever know they are there. If I just keep quiet, I can carry these hurts, deeply buried, to my grave and no one will ever know. But….I know…and God knows…and deep down inside those “secrets” are festering and poisoning my heart and I really just need to dig them out. NOW, please.
There is a part of me that screams, “What good could possibly come from dragging up the past?” And then quieter, “Leave it buried.” “You really don’t want to live through that again, do you?” And then there is the part of me that says, (Quieter) “You probably don’t want to say that at church. What if the Pastor finds out?” “You really shouldn’t write that in your blog. What if you disappoint readers or lead a bad example?” “If you let people see that part of you, you will be left alone…again.” Do you recognize these voices? Do you hear the whispered hisses?
As we have been traveling together through this book, we have learned so much. Since Lisa is using sword analogies, we have a visual representation of our cross in our hands. Our sword, when stuck in the ground, is a cross. Our sword, when held in the air…is still a cross.
It has been said that the cross is a bridge. The cross of Jesus bridges the gap between our sinful nature and the perfect, Holy God. It has also been said that sin entered the world by a beautiful, fruit-filled tree, and on the ragged, bark-stripped cross, Jesus made the perfect provision for us to be made whole. As Lisa says, “Just as Adam stole the fruit of a forbidden tree and caused all within him to die, Jesus died on a barren tree and thus became its fruit that all in him might live.” (p. 64). You and I are part of the fruit of Adam, and if we accept Jesus’ gift on the cross, we are His fruit as well.
Because we are Adam’s fruit we have a sinful, hurtful part of us. We hurt people. Many of you sisters have been hurt. Your hurt is holding you back from the freedom and abundant life Jesus Christ has to offer. Many of us have been taught to be ashamed, afraid and silent. We bear many burdens in silence, never letting anyone in to walk alongside us. We are lonely. I was lonely. That woman next door, she is lonely too. What if we no longer wanted to be lonely? Could we just get together, talk and share our stories?
That sounds risky, doesn’t it? I’m at a crossroads. I can make the decision NOT to live in fear, shame and disappointment. I can make the choice to REACH OUT to that woman and listen to her story. Maybe I will even share my story. Maybe our stories will meld together, we will strengthen each other, we will forge a bond that is not easily broken and we will no longer be alone. We will be ONE and an answer to Jesus’ prayer.
My sWord says this in Proverbs 27:17, “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.” I want to be sharp, useful and productive. I am created for a purpose. My story, when shared with another person, could be a life-changer, a world-changer.
I am not that person I used to be. You are not that person you used to be. Those people (back there in the past) made us who we are today, though, and we have to look at ourselves and see if we are who God made us to be. I have a choice to make. I think I’ll take out my sWord and see what wisdom I can find to lead me as I choose the path that leads to freedom in Christ.
Solomon, the wise man, found himself at a crossroad. God made an offer to Solomon and He makes the same offer to you. What would your heart’s desire be? Would you choose riches, fame, beauty, intelligence, a good job, a good-looking husband, a house full of kids? The Bible says Solomon asked for wisdom to be able to do God’s will for His people. Got granted him wisdom and then added riches, fame, beauty, intelligence, a kingdom, lots of wives and kids. Only God would do something so extravagant as that!
When Solomon’s life was nearing its end, he looked back over all he had, the choices he made, the things he had done and he was disappointed. The wisest man who ever lived was blessed abundantly by God and found that it is all meaningless without a relationship with the God of Heaven.
Ecclesiastes 8:9-13
I have thought deeply about all that goes on here under the sun, where people have the power to hurt each other…. When a crime is not punished quickly, people feel it is safe to do wrong. But even though a person sins a hundred times and still lives a long time, I know that those who fear God will be better off.
Solomon began to dig into his life experiences, uncover the meaningless parts that stood between him and the life God wanted for him. Solomon could have left us with the book of Proverbs and we would have thought he was quite profound and wise. Why did he write Ecclesiastes? Solomon had a story to tell. He needed to share with us what he learned so we could walk an easier path if we choose to.
If you are one of those sisters with buried secrets, living in shame and regret, you are at a crossroads. One path leads to a familiar place…loneliness, embarrassment, shame, pride, just getting by. The other path leads somewhere new and a little scary. This path makes me feel vulnerable and shaken. This path requires me to walk one step at a time lighted by faith, trust, hope and love. This path binds me to other travelers who are ready and willing to share their life story with me. I do not have to walk alone.
I don’t know about you, but I want to RISE when He calls my name. I want to lay down all the sorrow and shame, lies and pain. I want to follow Him! I want to pick up a sister along the way and take her with me.
Let’s Pray:
Father, Thank YOU for the cross. Father, give us strength to choose our cross and to follow You. Give us a willingness to share our stories with our sisters. Let those hurts, those wounds be used by You to bring healing to our hearts, Lord , and to free us from the shame that has held us captive for so long. We want to RISE when You call us. Thank You for wanting us. We are not alone. Never Alone. AMEN
If you would like to join us for the “Girls with Swords” Online Bible/Book study, click HERE to be taken to our sign-up page. Once you complete the enrollment process, we will email you further details. We hope you will join us!
About Teresa Bolme
Oh Girlfriend, you should see just how much I have highlighted in this chapter!! This is a GREAT chapter, and we need to really dig into it to understand just exactly what the Cross truly means!! I posted a message on our Facebook Community page, asking everyone to post one word stating what the Cross means to them. We had 19 descriptions given, but not one single person said SWORD! Isn’t that interesting?? Oh Lord, I pray for each woman who is reading this book…each woman that You have called as a Child, that she will dig DEEP, Lord….and find out the TRUE meaning of the Cross. There are so many wonderful meanings, but Lord studying this book with my sisters in Christ makes me see that there is so much MORE to Cross!!! Thank You Lord for your WORD!!!
Lead on Captain! We will be faithful soldiers to carry our crosses and the Word to the world.
A tree striped of its leaves many times indicates the lack of life, but in the case of the cross Jesus brought Life to the tree. That Life is meant for you and me. When we come to a ‘cross’road and recognize the prompting of the Holy Spirit to share our story with someone, we have the opportunity to pass on that Life to another. PTL
I really appreciated Lisa’s explanation of Hebrews 6:13, 17-18 (MSG) “…He backed it to the hilt..He gave His Word…His Word cannot change…” …victory is certain!” God is trustworthy and to confirm it He gave Jesus. What Love!
I love how deeply you think. Your comments spur me on to a deeper relationship with the Father. Love you Clella.
teresa, my sister, my friend, my fellow traveler in this journey—please don’t stop preaching. i thank God for what He inspires in your heart, for how He helps you be brave enough to speak (write) it, for all that He is doing through you and in you! <3
l-o-v-e this little snippet: "I am not that person I used to be. You are not that person you used to be. Those people (back there in the past) made us who we are today, though, and we have to look at ourselves and see if we are who God made us to be. I have a choice to make. I think I’ll take out my sWord and see what wisdom I can find to lead me as I choose the path that leads to freedom in Christ." walking this freedom trail with y'all! <3
I am so privileged to walk beside you, Coleen as we choose our path daily that leads to freedom.
This is beautiful:) Thank you for the reminder that I am not who I used to be. My favorite part of this part of the chapter is what you quoted from page 64: “Just as Adam stole the fruit of a forbidden tree and caused all within him to die, Jesus died on a barren tree and thus became its fruit that all in him might live.” God’s ways are so cool aren’t they? I am excited for this chapter!! Thanks for starting it off BEAUTIFULLY!
Thank you, my friend. God’s ways are waaaay cooler than anything we could dream up. I am so thankful.
What an inspiring beginning to Chapter 5! Great words, Teresa! I am inspired, also, by all of the comments above – great insight!
My favorite quotes so far in Chapter 5 are:
~ “The cross bridged the gaping chasm between heaven and earth to reconcile God and humanity and went on to transform what appeared to be a horrific defeat into a stunning triumph.”
~ “Just as Adam stole the fruit of a forbidden tree and caused all within him to die, Jesus died on a barren tree and thus became its fruit that all in him might live.”
~ “Through the offering of his Son, Jesus, God used the cross as a sword to kill the hostility between God and man.”
Powerful words!
Absolutely. You have picked out some of my favorite parts also. Thank you for coming along for the ride with us.
It’s so freeing to just let it out. Step 1 was the hardest. To admit I had an addiction but it was so freeing. God couldn’t work if I couldn’t admit. Great blog mama t
Step 4 is still the hardest for me. I thought I had dealt with my issues until God uncovered a deeply buried one a couple of weeks ago. He is faithful to take this wound as well and heal me…again. You are an inspiration to me, Ms. Kim.
Awesome, awesome, awesome blog!! I hear those voices very often. Not good enough, true. Not worthy enough, true. Shameful over past, true. But praise, He took me just as I was, sin and all. I will rise, no more sorrow, no more pain. Thanks Mama T
Thank you, Ms. Erin. God is working on something here. I love the encouragement you ladies give us to continue to listen to the Holy Spirit as we study this book together. We serve an Awesome God!
I know when I became saved, I was overwhelmed by HIS unconditional Love. He died for me to save me from my sins, it was a gift, I couldn’t earn it( couldn’t be good enough) and I just had to accept my salvation by faith and believing. I also know I sin everyday. Like you said Lisa, we hurt people often unintentionally, but like you I am often convicted of my sin. What do we do? One time when I was in prayer probably a bit discouraged with my old nature, I may have read it, but convicted by the holy spirit to clean out my closet (hidden sin) daily. Ephesians4:26-27 And “don’t sin by letting anger gain control over you.” Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a mighty foothold to the Devil. Ephesian 4:32 Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you. Our father asks us to LOVE unconditionally. I pray for God’s grace to be able to LOVE unconditionally. One book I was reading stated, when we are able by the grace of GOD to love unconditionally we experience a piece of Heaven on Earth!! As we are instructed to pray “Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name,your kingdom come. May your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.” One church in our area has a billboard that states LOVE GOD, LOVE OTHERS. Love others like he Love’s us unconditionally!! HEAVEN on earth!! I feel God’s LOVE from each one of you ladies!!! May we pass the LOVE around to our neighbors and whomever HE puts in our path!!
Amen, sweet sister. Love the encouragement from Scripture.
I loved how you tied this part of the lesson in with the wisdom of Solomon, Teresa. If we could remember to just use a little wisdom, how much heartache could we save ourselves. Great post on sharing our testimony and let iron sharpen iron.