What God requires of all covenant relationships, including marriages, is that He be at the center. Whether your husband believes this or not doesn’t matter. — Dineen Miller, pg. 85
I cringed a bit when I opened my book and saw that I was writing on obedience this week. I’m sure the Lord got a good laugh at my expense! Obedience is not something that comes naturally to me. In fact, it is downright hard sometimes to live in full obedience to God. The earthly world is constantly pulling me this way and that, making me question my every decision. It is in these times that it becomes even more crucial to draw near to God and to live and breathe the pages of His Word.
But, how do we, as believers, live in obedience to the Lord in a spiritually unequal marriage?
Let me answer that question with another question.
How would your relationship with the Lord be different if you were in a spiritually equal marriage?
I want you to stop reading and really think about that question. Would your relationship with Jesus be different if your spouse were saved?
Mine would. I mean, I could actively live out my faith with my husband. I could talk openly about it. We could pray together. We could read Bible passages together. We could go to church together. It would be amazing!!
Right?!
Right?!?!
Well, let us look back at the question I asked. Would YOUR relationship with Jesus be different if your spouse were saved?
What defines your relationship with Jesus? Is it defined by whether or not your spouse comes to faith? Is it defined by you being able to pray with your spouse or being able to read Bible passages together? Is it defined by going to church with your spouse…or not? Why does my (or your) relationship with our mighty Savior depend on the actions (or inactions) of another sinful, imperfect human?
Dear friends . . . God can only work in your life and in your marriage if you let Him. If you do not let Him in to those dark, secret, hurtful places, things will not change. He wants more than anything in the entire world for you and your husband to have a loving, thriving marriage. And, I’m here to tell you that you can have that. If you let God in. If you let God have control. If you are obedient to what God wants you to do. I am not saying it will be easy, but it will be worth it. And you can do it with an unbelieving spouse by your side. Jesus tells us in His Word that there is one great commandment, which is:
“Master, which is the great commandment in the law?” Jesus said unto him, “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment.” (Matthew 22:36-40, KJV)
It does not say that we should love God only if our expectations of Him are met first.
It does not say that we should be obedient to God only if he meets our needs first.
God wants our love. He wants to be at the center of our lives.
He wants to be at the center of our marriages, whether our husband believes in Him or not. Since WE believe, WE bring Jesus into our marriage. And that, my dear friends, is powerful. Soak that it. Rest in that truth. Whether you see God in your marriage right now or not, I promise you HE IS THERE and HE IS WORKING.
I had to rely on God to rebuild my marriage according to His design, not my expectations. — Dineen Miller, pg. 87
So, if you are struggling in your marriage today, give God the reins. Ask God to show you how to be obedient to Him, when the world is telling you otherwise. Let God transform your marriage. He is able. The question is – Do you believe it?
*****
Let’s Pray: Father God, we sit at your feet in awe of who you are and just the depth of love that you have for each one of us. Father, please draw near to each person reading this blog today and help them grow in their relationship with you, regardless of where their spouse is spiritually. We know that you want our spouses saved even more than we do, Father. Just help us grow in our walk with you each and every day and not focus on what we do not have. We know you are able to accomplish mighty things, Lord, and we trust you to see that work through to completion. Open our ears, hearts, and minds to hear from you today and show us how to live obediently in Your Presence. In the mighty name of Jesus I pray, Amen!!!!!
Your Assignment: Write out your own prayer below asking God to help you be obedient to Him amidst any turmoil that may be surrounding you in your marriage. Let’s pray over one another today and for all of the marriages in need. Then head over to the secret Facebook group and let’s talk some more about obedience to the Lord.
*****
For the “Winning Him Without Words” Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the “sign-up here” button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!
*****
Father God, I come to you in the name of your son, Jesus, acknowledging that it's me, O Lord, standing in the need of prayer, not my husband's relationship with You, but me. Jennifer so helps me to be reminded of your words that asks "Who do YOU say I am?" And so, today, I draw near to You, longing for more of your presence in my life, and give the reins of my marriage to YOU. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.
Amen!! And a good reminder – "Who do YOU say I am?"
truth, jennifer; my relationship w/ my Lord is only about Him and me. so if there is a problem, it is only 'cause of me. <3
Father, i know i need Your help, and ask, in the name of Jesus, that You would provide that supernatural assistance! by Your grace, Lord, and my determination to obey You, may my thoughts, my words, my actions, my heart be pleasing to You. i claim Your promise: "And we receive from Him whatever we ask, because we [watchfully] obey His orders [observe His suggestions and injunctions, follow His plan for us] and [habitually] practice what is pleasing to Him" (1st john 3:22) <3
Amen! A tough truth, right? But one to really think about!!
Dear Lord, help me keep my focus on being my best for you and to not be distracted. Guide my every thought, word and action today as I seek to do my best for your glory. Help me be intentional in how I love my husband and family and show them so clearly how much they mean to me. In Your Son's name I pray, amen <3
Amen <3
Father, I thank you for the blessing of my husband, even as a pre-believer, through the struggles we have, You have drawn me into Your love through those struggles. As I continue to place You first in my life, marriage and home, show me more. More of Your love, Your mercy, Your kindness, more of Your comfort, Lord. You know our path, You know my hearts desire, You know my husband. Teach me, lead me to be better in loving my Corey, showing him Your love and allowing me to see him through Jesus eyes. Thank you for our struggles, for it is thru them that I am clinging to You! Keep me calm, strong and courageous as we weather thru this time of uncertainity and help me to bring You more into our marriage thru my actions, words and attitude. In Your precious son's name, Amen. <3
Amen, Jennifer! Beautiful! Love your heart, girlfriend!
Lord, Remind me to put You above everything else in my life. Let me keep You first and foremost in my life. I want You to be the center of all my relationships Lord, especially my marriage. I want my heart to be pure and obedient to You alone Lord, not distracted by my circumstances. For You hold my life, my husband, my marriage, my circumstances in Your mighty hands. Help me release my expectations of what marriage should be and instead rely on what You O God intend for our marriage to be. Show me how to keep my focus on You. Let me praise You for the blessings instead of bemoaning what is missing. Open my heart, my mind to the Holy Spirit within me so I can live in obedience to You, Your will and Your purpose for my life. In Jesus name, so be it!
Amen, Amen, Amen!!
Lord I pray that you would be first in my life, that I would turn to you first in all. Help me to work my marriage for the glory of you. I pray that this would be my first thought waking up and my last thought going to sleep. Thank you for marriage and for your guiding love . AMEN!
Amen!!
Lord God, may the meditations of my heart, the words of my mouth, and my actions toward the man You have blessed me with, all be pleasing unto You. Holy Spirit, help me keep a guard over a tongue. Help me be the submissive wife I am called to be.
Help me to keep YOU first, and then my husband, and everything else after. There is nothing more important Lord than my relationship with YOU and my husband. Holy Spirit give me creative ideas for our anniversary this week to help make this the most special time we've had yet! Keep all obstacles out of our way. Together, let's make this one FUN anniversary!!!
Continue to work on my husband's heart Lord, and bring him closer and closer to You, Lord.
I pray these things not only for my own marriage, Lord, but over each marriage that is represented here today. In Jesus' precious Name, AMEN!
I so love your heart, Christi!! Amen(z)!! Have a blessed anniversary! <3
I love your heart too, hon. It's such a blessing to work with so many people who love the Lord so very much, and who take spreading the gospel so seriously!! You bless my socks off!!
<3
EXCELLENT post, Jennifer. So well said and just love how you brought out how our husband's salvation does not define our relationship with Jesus. Amen!
Wow, thank you so much, Dineen!! Your words mean so much to me! The Holy Spirit really impressed this upon my heart as I was working through what to write. I think that sometimes we have expectations of God that hinder our relationship with Him when He doesn't meet our needs how WE think He should!! I think He is working in me as I am blogging through this study more than anything else!!!
God I pray you will continue to teach me to seek you first and then obey your guidance…and as I do help my husband to "see" that it's not just me putting him aside for the moment but its YOU putting and keeping us together for a LIFETIME….
I love this, Beverly. Beautiful… thank you for your words.