As I read the passages for today, two very distinct ideas came through for me. In trying to decide what to talk about, I felt I should share the full spectrum of my feelings while I read and re-read the passage, so I will try to talk about both without too much confusion!
In “Full Place Setting”, the authors talk about a friend who, at first, was saving her best for when she found her future husband and got married. When she realized she didn’t need someone in her life to treat herself to the best she had to offer, it freed her. She deserved china and crystal just as much as a single woman as she would as a married woman. I agree with this 100%. While I may not have china or some of the finer things in life, I do like to treat myself to things like manicures or a good haircut. I like to use glasses and not plastic cups. I like to wear pretty pajamas. To do less implies that we are worth less without a husband and that is simply untrue. So I am reading and thinking “Hey – I got this…no problem…finally something I don’t struggle with!”
Then I thought of it. My mattress. Yes, my mattress. I moved out of my parent’s house when I was 26. I had to buy all new furniture, and my new queen bed, finally graduating from the twin I had slept in all my life! I am now 41. This mattress is 15 years old. It has rips, it sags, I constantly flip it, but it doesn’t take long before I need to do it all over again. Now why am I telling you about my beat up mattress? Guess what I say every time I wake up with a sore back, or I am changing the sheets and I see the rips or handles falling off? “When I get married, I’ll get a new mattress set. It will be a fresh beginning.” My mattress is my “paper plates”! Do I not deserve a good night sleep as a single woman? To wake up without pain? To feel like I am worth more than rips, tears and a big sag. I don’t have to wait until I will be sharing my bed with a man to get a new mattress. I am worth it all on my own! (Now to find the money! )
Now, in the rest of the passage I was called to look inward and see if I am doing all I can in service during my time as a single woman in Christ. I feel that I have fully embraced this time as a pursuit of Jesus and service. My situation is a little different, because I am a single mom of a 5 year old boy. Some may use this as a reason not to do as much at church, but have looked at the last 3+ years as a great way to include my son in the life of the church, so that he develops a love for it as much as I have. I will not lie. I have a lot on my plate, and I have been praying for guidance in whether God still wants me in all the places he has me. That does not mean that I don’t enjoy everything I am involved in (or it wouldn’t be so hard to think about letting something go!), but admittedly it is a juggling act and sometimes I am very grateful for grace!
If you have not gotten involved at your church yet, I wholeheartedly encourage you to do so. Pray to see where God leads you, think about what you enjoy, and if you don’t like babies I wouldn’t suggest the nursery as your first volunteer experience! God may surprise you. When I was first saved, I felt the calling of God clearly in the areas of youth and music. I got involved in youth group right away, but it wasn’t until a few months ago that it became my time to get involved in the Worship Team. Be sensitive to the spirit. One place I never thought I would be is the head of women’s ministries in the church, but the fruit I have seen from serving in this ministry is truly humbling.
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One of the best ways to combat feeling sorry for ourselves in our time alone is to serve others in need. So ladies, take some time to pray today. Where does our Lord want you? Where can you be of service to Him? In your church? In the missions field? In your local community? My guess is that God knows exactly where you belong, and can’t wait to see you shine! And remember, use the fine china along the way!
Let’s Pray
Lord I know that you have amazing experiences in store for every woman reading these words right now. Help them to see where they are needed. If they already faithfully serve you, give them the strength to continue on their path. All that we do is for Your glory. At times it is easy to focus inward on ourselves, and our situation. Jesus help us to be humble as we serve and be reminded that it’s not all about us. We are needed, we are useful, and we deserve to give ourselves the best along the way. In your Holy Name we pray. Amen
Your Assignment
Please leave a comment below sharing your experiences with service. Do you currently serve in your church or other organization? If so, how does that help you? Does it help you?
If you are not currently serving, what things are you interested in that could lead to service opportunities? Have you prayed for guidance? Talked to someone at your church? What would you like to see come out of that experience?
Blessings,
Michelle
About Michelle Graziano
I have been very involved in my church…I think it is very important to get involved. I run the singles ministry in my church..God has blessed me abundently through serving him. I am trying very hard this year to get to know more people and God continues to bless me as I am getting to know more people. God gives me the words and the courage to go up to new people and introduce myself and invite them to lunch. Every sunday after service a bunch of us singles go out for lunch and it is always my goal to have a new person with us every Sunday..and that has happened. I also babysit in our church and then again I am getting to know more people. When you get to know more people and get involved God will bless you more than you can imagine…I challenge each and everyone of you to make it a point to get to know a new person every week. The one thing I try to do with my singles ministry is not to just allow singles but when we do fun events I invite everyone in our church and I will tell you that it is making quite the difference couples are getting to know singles and vice versa. My feeling about leading our singles ministry is to get singles and couples to know each other cause we are all singles in Christ.
And Patty's a blessing to those she serves. 🙂 Miss you beautiful!
Thanks…I try!!
That's wonderful Patty! I wish we had a singles ministry at our church. We are small, and mostly families. (So of course every time a single man comes through the door – everyone looks at me! LOL)
I don't currently serve within my church. God has me here at home for the moment. He has however placed GCH in my life so that I will grow and serve Him. I can't tell you how much I've been blessed by the ladies here. I never thought I'd get so much out of praying for others or the singles ministry, being a married mother of 3.
I am glad God has led you to us Tracy! 🙂
Love you Tracy. Thank you for answering God's call.
michelle, i love your prayer 'specially this part: " We are needed, we are useful, and we deserve to give ourselves the best along the way." you ARE SO needed. i am praying for each of you that Jesus will show you opportunity after opportunity to give and serve and bless…to love others with His love! xo <3
Thank you Coleen – that means so much, especially coming from such a prayer warrior as you! I always struggle with my prayers! Give God the glory on this one 🙂
I was serving in my church through leading a women's group in Celebrate Recovery. I also lead a women's group with another Christian organization. I am not currently serving, as we just moved to a different state. I am praying on serving at church, but also am taking a time of rest and working with my son's school on the PTM. I do believe serving is very important as our service is to the Lord. I have enjoyed serving as I have grown more through serving than those I was serving. My blessings were in abundance. I do look forward to serving as the Lord leads. I had not really thought of using my best just for me. I always look to give
my best to others, but not just for me – something new to think about.
You are definitely in a season to take a little break, have you found a new home church? I pray he will use you mightily wherever you are!
"One of the best ways to combat feeling sorry for ourselves in our time alone is to serve others in need." So very true! I think that doing for others and helping others allows us to get our minds off of ourselves, it also allows us to see things from a different perspective.
I think that is crucial Tonya. I need to remember it's not all about me.
Great post once again Michelle. You are a blessing to us.
Thanks Jackie, I would say the same about you! xo