Ladies, this blog today was extremely difficult for me to share with you and the world as I have never been one to be so transparent about my life, so I pray that God would use this to reach someone out there that must need to hear it, to be encouraged from it.<\/p>\n
When you were a teenager did you make this statement to one of your girlfriends, \u201cI found the man of my dreams, my soulmate\u201d \u00a0I did that when I met my man. \u00a0I wanted so much to graduate high school and get married and have someone else meet my needs that I didn\u2019t feel were being met at home.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 When I met my guy at high school, \u00a0I thought right then OK there is no one else for me, he is \u201cthe one\u201d for me.\u00a0 I never dated anyone but him.\u00a0 At that time I was not a Christian so I didn\u2019t know anything about seeking \u201cthe man\u201d God wanted for my life, I was strictly going with \u201cmy feelings, my wants, and my desires.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0 A strong desire to \u201cget married\u201d and get out of my home.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 My parents were having marital problems and I just wanted to get out of all that was going on, so I kept putting myself into this dating relationship more and more so I kept my mind off of what was going on in my home.<\/p>\n
We dated for four years and the day he asked me to marry him was \u201cwonderful\u201d.\u00a0 I thought YAY, now my needs will finally be met.\u00a0 I will get something that I want. \u00a0I did not truly know at that time what my \u201cdeepest need\u201d really was nor did I know that he was not the one who would meet it.<\/p>\n
I thought I was Cinderella and all my dreams I had ever had were gonna finally come to fruition\u2026..but ladies this was only the beginning of what would be coming to pass in my life.<\/p>\n
Wedding plans were being made\u2026<\/p>\n
A new job was provided for us both\u2026<\/p>\n
A home was found for us to move into\u2026<\/p>\n
We both were attending church at the time\u2026<\/p>\n
my dream life, my needs were coming together\u2026..or so I thought<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n
I thought this man was going to be my knight in shining armor, the one that would give me \u201ceverything\u201d I had always wanted and needed. I talked myself into believing that, into believing in him to solely take charge of that area, \u201cto provide me with \u201cevery need\u201d (and wants by the way)\u2026..he had a good job making money like I had never experienced in our home before.\u00a0 Ladies I had NEEDS and I just knew he was the one to \u201cprovide\u201d.<\/p>\n
I had need for:<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/p>\n I was spending my life trying to get my needs met by many sources and at this time in my life I was totally focused on my boyfriend to do that for me, by marrying me.<\/p>\n In the year before we were married I began going to church more and learning more about God and I was beginning to understand that there was someone else who could meet \u201cmy true need\u201d.<\/p>\n THE NEED OF SALVATION<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n I finally realized that no human being could meet \u201cmy deepest need\u201d, that only God could.\u00a0\u00a0 I was placing a lot of expectations on my boyfriend soon to be husband to take on that role and he could not do it.<\/p>\n Only God could meet my needs I had (acceptance, identity, security and purpose).\u00a0\u00a0 In John 6:35 Jesus says to me \u201cI am the bread of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry and he who believes in me will never be thirsty.\u201d<\/p>\n Ladies, Jesus had the ability to give me the spiritual food and drink that I needed to \u201csatisfy\u201d my longings, my needs.\u00a0 He invited me to come to him for my need to be met.<\/p>\n On April 17, 1979 I accepted His invitation to do just that and oh how my life changed.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I \u201cfinally\u201d had someone who could and wanted to meet \u201cmy every need<\/span>\u201d, not just the wants I was experiencing before this day.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I still did not understand that I needed to seek God for the man I was to spend my life with, I mean I had been dating for 4 years and my wedding was planned and the wedding day was approaching, was I really suppose to put all that on hold until I had time to \u201cseek Him\u201d for answers, well since I didn\u2019t truly know all that, I kept going with all the plans as they were and we were married on June 23, 1979.<\/p>\n We continued to attend church together and God was meeting my needs.\u00a0\u00a0 I was growing but \u201cwe\u201d<\/strong> were not growing in Him.\u00a0 I was still expecting my husband to meet needs that I wanted met.\u00a0 I was placing expectations on my husband that he could not uphold—you see my \u201cdeepest need\u201d would then and always only be met by God, so I need to keep these areas separate and allow God to meet the needs He will meet and my husband to meet the needs he can meet as they are not the same ladies.<\/p>\n I needed to release my husband from the job that was God\u2019s. God can heal us, love us in the way we need.<\/p>\n Man\u2019s love is natural.<\/p>\n God\u2019s love is supernatural.<\/p>\n Our husbands can\u2019t possibly take on a role that was not his to begin with and if we try to \u201cmake\u201d him do it he will begin to feel like a failure and resentment will begin to creep in and threaten our relationship.<\/p>\n \u00a0<\/i><\/b>Pg. 70-71; When our expectations are rightly placed in the One who created those needs in the first place we will discover freedoms in our marriage that allows us to be the woman God created each of us to be and the wife He needs us to be so that He can work through us to reach our husband. The burden is taken off our man, as is the label of failure. We can then respect our husband as he is and love him unconditionally.<\/p>\n I am happy to say I have been married 33 years, but sad to say I have just recently realized in the past year that I can\u2019t force\u00a0my husband to join me at church and in \u201cmy<\/b> relationship\u201d with God because he has to find those things on his own, but what I can do is pray for him and pray for us and:<\/p>\n \u201clook only to God to meet our needs\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n My man is my man and I want him as much today as I did back in high school and I have hope, joy, peace, trust and respect in Him and I need him every day, but to need him, \u00a0 \u00a0I NEED GOD FIRST because it is God who will indeed meet the deepest places in “our marriage”.<\/p>\n \u00a0<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n Let\u2019s Pray:<\/span><\/i><\/b>\u00a0 God I thank you for meeting my every \u201cneed\u201d since that day I met you and I pray for each lady who reads part of my short testimony today that if they have that same \u201cneed\u201d to meet you as their provider that they too will say yes and release their \u201cguy\u201d from trying to be the one to meet it, but allow You to be their true provider in their life, in your name I pray Amen!<\/p>\n Your assignment:<\/span><\/i><\/b>\u00a0 Who is meeting your deepest need? On a daily basis, on whom do you rely the most and to whom do you go to first to get your deepest need met?\u00a0\u00a0 Tell us about it\u2026.<\/p>\n \u00a0<\/b><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/b><\/p>\n For the \u201cWinning Him Without Words\u201d Bible Study, you will need the book, your Bible, pen or pencil, a highlighter and a quiet place. You can order the book right through our website by clicking the \u201csign-up here\u201d button at the top of our webpage; which is also where you can sign up to participate in this awesome bible study!<\/b><\/p>\n Please email Christi@girlfriendscoffeehour.com if you have any questions, or if you have a private comment that you would like to forward to one of our bloggers in regards to their post that day.<\/b><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Ladies, this blog today was extremely difficult for me to share with you and the world as I have never been one to be so transparent about my life, so I pray that God would use this to reach someone out there that must need to hear it, to be encouraged from it. 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